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har1880.2007.001.0008.jpg [illustration - UNCLE REMUS AND HIS DECEITFUL JUG. ]
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THE FOLK-LORE OF THE OLD PLANTATION
D. APPLETON AND COMPANY
1, 3, AND 5 BOND STREET
har1880.2007.001.0010.jpg COPYRIGHT BY
D. APPLETON AND COMPANY
1880.
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INTRODUCTION.
I am advised by my publishers that this book is to be included in their catalogue of humorous publications, and this friendly warning gives me an opportunity to say that however humorous it may be in effect, its intention is perfectly serious; and, even if it were otherwise, it seems to me that a volume written wholly in dialect must have its solemn, not to say melancholy, features. With respect to the Folk-Lore series, my purpose has been to preserve the legends themselves in their original simplicity, and to wed them permanently to the quaint dialect—if, indeed, it can be called a dialect—through the medium of which they have become a part of the domestic history of every Southern family; and I have endeavored to give to the whole a genuine flavor of the old plantation.
Each legend has its variants, but in every instance I have retained that particular
version which seemed to me to be the most characteristic, and have given it without
embellishment and without exaggeration. The dialect, it will be observed, is wholly
different from that of the Hon. Pompey Smash and his literary descendants, and
different
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also from the intolerable
misrepresentations of the minstrel stage, but it is at least phonetically
genuine. Nevertheless, if the language of Uncle Remus fails to give vivid hints of the
really poetic imagination of the negro; if it fails to embody the quaint and homely
humor which was his most prominent characteristic; if it does not suggest a certain
picturesque sensitiveness—a curious exaltation of mind and temperament not to be
defined by words—then I have reproduced the form of the dialect merely, and not the
essence, and my attempt may be accounted a failure. At any rate, I trust I have been
successful in presenting what must be, at least to a large portion of American
readers, a new and by no means unattractive phase of negro character—a phase which
may be considered a curiously sympathetic supplement to Mrs. Stowe's wonderful
defense of slavery as it existed in the South. Mrs. Stowe, let me hasten to
say, attacked the possibilities of slavery with all the eloquence of genius; but the
same genius painted the portrait of the Southern slave-owner, and defended him.
A number of the plantation legends originally appeared in the columns of a daily
newspaper—"The Atlanta Constitution"—and in that shape they attracted the attention
of various gentlemen who were kind enough to suggest that they would prove to be
valuable contributions to myth-literature. It is but fair to say that ethnological
considerations formed no part of the undertaking which has resulted in the
publication of this volume. Professor J. W. Powell, of the Smithsonian Institution,
who is engaged in an investigation of the mythology of the North American Indians,
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informs me that some of Uncle Remus's stories
appear in a number of different languages, and in various modified forms, among the
Indians; and he is of the opinion that they are borrowed by the negroes from the
red-men. But this, to say the least, is extremely doubtful, since another
investigator (Mr. Herbert H. Smith, author of "Brazil and the Amazons") has met
with some of these stories among tribes of South American Indians, and one in
particular he has traced to India, and as far east as Siam. Mr. Smith has been kind
enough to send me the proof-sheets of his chapter on "The Myths and Folk-Lore of the
Amazonian Indians," in which he reproduces some of the stories which he gathered
while exploring the Amazons.
In the first of his series, a tortoise falls from a tree upon the head of a jaguar
and kills him; in one of Uncle Remus's stories, the terrapin falls from a shelf in
Miss Meadows's house and stuns the fox, so that the latter fails to catch the rabbit.
In the next, a jaguar catches a tortoise by the hind-leg as he is disappearing in his
hole; but the tortoise convinces him he is holding a root, and so escapes; Uncle
Remus tells how the fox endeavored to drown the terrapin, but turned him loose
because the terrapin declared his tail to be only a stump-root. Mr. Smith also gives the story of how the
tortoise outran the deer, which is identical as to incident with Uncle Remus's story
of how Brer Tarrypin outran Brer Rabbit. Then there is the story of how the tortoise
pretended that he was stronger than the tapir. He tells the latter he can drag
him into the sea, but the tapir retorts that he will pull the tortoise into the
forest and kill
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him besides. The tortoise
thereupon gets a vine-stem, ties one end around the body of the tapir, and goes to
the sea, where he ties the other end to the tail of a whale. He then goes into the
wood, midway between them both, and gives the vine a shake as a signal for the
pulling to begin. The struggle between the whale and tapir goes on until each thinks
the tortoise is the strongest of animals. Compare this with the story of the
terrapin's contest with the bear, in which Miss Meadows's bed-cord is used instead of
a vine-stem. One of the most characteristic of Uncle Remus's stories is that in which
the rabbit proves to Miss Meadows and the girls that the fox is his riding-horse.
This is almost identical with a story quoted by Mr. Smith, where the jaguar is about
to marry the deer's daughter. The cotia—a species of rodent—is also in love with
her, and he tells the deer that he can make a riding-horse of the jaguar. "Well," says the deer, "if you can make the jaguar
carry you, you shall have my daughter." Thereupon the story proceeds pretty
much as Uncle Remus tells it of the fox and rabbit. The cotia finally jumps from the
jaguar and takes refuge in a hole, where an owl is set to watch him, but he flings
sand in the owl's eyes and escapes. In another story given by Mr. Smith, the cotia is
very thirsty, and, seeing a man coming with a jar on his head, lies down in the road
in front of him, and repeats this until the man puts down his jar to go back after
all the dead cotias he has seen. This is almost identical with Uncle Remus's story of
how the rabbit robbed the fox of his game. In a story from Upper Egypt, a fox lies
down in
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the road in front of a man who is carrying
fowls to market, and finally succeeds in securing them.
This similarity extends to almost every story quoted by Mr. Smith, and some are so nearly identical as to point unmistakably to a common origin; but when and where? When did the negro or the North American Indian ever come in contact with the tribes of South America? Upon this point the author of "Brazil and the Amazons," who is engaged in making a critical and comparative study of these myth-stories, writes:
"I am not prepared to form a theory about these stories. There can be no doubt that some of them, found among the negroes and the Indians, had a common origin. The most natural solution would be to suppose that they originated in Africa, and were carried to South America by the negro slaves. They are certainly found among the Red Negroes; but, unfortunately for the African theory, it is equally certain that they are told by savage Indians of the Amazons Valley, away up on the Tapajos, Red Negro, and Tapurá. These Indians hardly ever see a negro, and their languages are very distinct from the broken Portuguese spoken by the slaves. The form of the stories, as recounted in the Tupi and Mundurucú languages, seems to show that they were originally formed in those languages or have long been adopted in them.
"It is interesting to find a story from Upper Egypt (that of the fox who pretended
to be dead) identical with an Amazonian story, and strongly resembling one found
by you among the negroes. Varnhagen,
the Brazilian historian (now Visconde de Rio Branco), tried to prove a relationship between
the ancient Egyptians, or other Turanian
stock, and the Tupi Indians. His theory rested on rather a slender basis, yet it
must be confessed that he had one or two
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strong points. Do the
resemblances between Old and New World stories point to a similar conclusion? It
would be hard to say with the material that we now have.
"One thing is certain. The animal stories told by the negroes in our Southern States and in Brazil were brought by them from Africa. Whether they originated there, or with the Arabs, or Egyptians, or with yet more ancient nations, must still be an open question. Whether the Indians got them from the negroes or from some earlier source is equally uncertain. We have seen enough to know that a very interesting line of investigation has been opened."
Professor Hartt, in his "Amazonian Tortoise Myths," quotes a story from the "Riverside Magazine" of November, 1868, which will be recognized as a variant of one given by Uncle Remus. I venture to append it here, with some necessary verbal and phonetic alterations, in order to give the reader an idea of the difference between the dialect of the cotton plantations, as used by Uncle Remus, and the lingo in vogue on the rice plantations and Sea Islands of the South Atlantic States:
"One time B'er Deer an' B'er Cooter (Terrapin) was courtin', and de lady did bin lub B'er Deer mo' so dan B'er Cooter. She did bin lub B'er Cooter, but she lub B'er Deer de morest. So de noung lady say to B'er Deer and B'er Cooter bofe dat dey mus' hab a ten-mile race, an' de one dat beats, she will go marry him. "One time Brer Deer and Brer Cooter (Terrapin) was courting, and the lady did been love Brer Deer more so than Brer Cooter. She did been love Brer Cooter, but she love Brer Deer the morest. So the young lady say to Brer Deer and Brer Cooter before that they must have a ten-mile race, and the one that beats, she will go marry him.
"So B'er Cooter say to B'er Deer: 'You has got mo' longer legs dan I has, but I will run you. You run ten mile on land, and I will run ten mile on de water!' "So Brer Cooter say to Brer Deer: 'You has got more longer legs than I has, but I will run you. You run ten mile on land, and I will run ten mile on the water!'
"So B'er Cooter went an' git nine er his fam'ly, an' put
one at ebery mile-pos', and he hisse'f, what was to run wid B'er Deer,
"So Brer Cooter went and get nine of his family, and put one at every
mile-post, and he hisself, what was to run with Brer Deer,
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he was right in front of de young lady's do', in de
broom-grass.
he was right in front of the young lady's door, in the broom-grass.
"Dat mornin' at nine o'clock, B'er Deer he did met B'er Cooter at de fus mile-pos', wey dey was to start fum. So he call: 'Well, B'er Cooter, is you ready? Go long!' As he git on to de nex' mile-pos', he say: 'B'er Cooter!' B'er Cooter say: 'Hullo!' B'er Deer say: 'You dere?' B'er Cooter say: 'Yes, B'er Deer, I dere too.' "That morning at nine o'clock, Brer Deer he did met Brer Cooter at the first mile-post, where they was to start from. So he call: 'Well, Brer Cooter, is you ready? Go long!' As he get on to the next mile-post, he say: 'Brer Cooter!' Brer Cooter say: 'Hullo!' Brer Deer say: 'You there?' Brer Cooter say: 'Yes, Brer Deer, I there too.'
"Nex' mile-pos' he jump, B'er Deer say: 'Hullo, B'er Cooter!' B'er Cooter say: 'Hullo, B'er Deer! you dere too?' B'er Deer say: 'Ki! it look like you gwine fer tie me; it look like we gwine fer de gal tie!' "Next mile-post he jump, Brer Deer say: 'Hello, Brer Cooter!' Brer Cooter say: 'Hello, Brer Deer! you there too?' Brer Deer say: it look like you going for tie me; it look like we going for the equal tie!'
"W'en he git to de nine-mile pos' he tought he git dere fus, 'cause he mek two jump; so he holler: 'B'er Cooter!' B'er Cooter answer: 'You dere too?' B'er Deer say: 'It look like you gwine tie me.' B'er Cooter say: 'Go long, B'er Deer. I git dere in due season time,' which he does, and wins the race." "When he get to the nine-mile post he thought he get there first, 'cause he make two jump; so he holler: 'Brer Cooter!' Brer Cooter answer: 'You there too?' Brer Deer say: 'It look like you going tie me.' Brer Cooter say: 'Go long, Brer Deer. I get there in due season time,' which he does, and wins the race."
The story of the Rabbit and the Fox, as told by the Southern negroes, is artistically
dramatic in this: it progresses in an orderly way from a beginning to a well-defined
conclusion, and is full of striking episodes that suggest the culmination. It seems
to me to be to a certain extent allegorical, albeit such an interpretation may be
unreasonable. At least it is a
fable thoroughly characteristic of the negro; and it needs no scientific
investigation to show why he selects as his hero the weakest and most harmless of all
animals, and brings him out victorious in contests with the bear, the wolf, and the
fox. It is not virtue that triumphs, but helplessness; it is not malice, but
mischievousness. It would be presumptive in me to offer an opinion as to the
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origin of these curious
myth-stories; but, if ethnologists should discover that they did not originate with
the African, the proof to that effect should be accompanied with a good deal of
persuasive eloquence.
Curiously enough, I have found few negroes who will acknowledge to a stranger that
they know anything of these legends; and yet to relate one of the stories is the
surest road to their confidence and esteem. In this way, and in this way only, I have
been enabled to collect and verify the folk-lore included in this volume. There is an
anecdote about the Irishman and the rabbit which a number of negroes have told to me
with great unction, and which is both funny and characteristic, though I will not
undertake to say that it has its origin with the blacks. One day an Irishman who had heard people
talking about "mares' nests" was going along
the big road—it is always the big road in contradistinction to neighborhood paths and
by-paths, called in the vernacular "nigh-cuts"—when he came to a
pumpkin-patch. The Irishman had
never seen any of this fruit before, and he at once concluded that he had discovered
a veritable mare's nest. Making the most of his opportunity, he gathered one of the
pumpkins in his arms and went on his way. A pumpkin is an exceedingly awkward thing
to carry, and the Irishman had not gone far before he made a misstep, and stumbled.
The pumpkin fell to the ground, rolled down the hill into a "brush-heap," and,
striking against a stump, was broken. The story continues in the dialect: "W'en de punkin roll in de bresh-heap, out jump a rabbit;
en soon's de I'shmuns see
"When the pumpkin roll in the brush-heap, out jump a rabbit; and soon as the
Irishman see
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dat, he take atter de rabbit en holler: 'Kworp, colty!
kworp, colty!' but de
rabbit, he des flew."
that, he take after the rabbit and holler: 'Kworp, colty! kworp,
colty!' but the
rabbit, he just flew." The point of this is obvious.
As to the songs, the reader is warned that it will be found difficult to make them conform to the ordinary rules of versification, nor is it intended that they should so conform. They are written, and are intended to be read, solely with reference to the regular and invariable recurrence of the cæsura, as, for instance, the first stanza of the Revival Hymn:
In other words, the songs depend for their melody and rhythm upon the musical quality of time, and not upon long or short, accented or unaccented syllables. I am persuaded that this fact led Mr. Sidney Lanier, who is thoroughly familiar with the metrical peculiarities of negro songs, into the exhaustive investigation which has resulted in the publication of his scholarly treatise on "The Science of English Verse."
The difference between the dialect of the legends and that of the character-sketches,
slight as it is, marks the modifications which the speech of the negro has undergone
even where education has played no part in reforming it. Indeed, save in the remote
country districts, the dialect of the legends has nearly disappeared. I am perfectly
well aware that the character-sketches are without permanent
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interest, but they are
embodied here for the purpose of presenting a phase of negro character wholly
distinct from that which I have endeavored to preserve in the legends. Only in this
shape, and with all the local allusions, would it be possible to adequately represent
the shrewd observations, the curious retorts, the homely thrusts, the quaint
comments, and the humorous philosophy of the race of which Uncle Remus is a type.
If the reader not familiar with plantation life will imagine that the myth-stories of Uncle Remus are told night after night to a little boy by an old negro who appears to be venerable enough to have lived during the period which he describes—who has nothing but pleasant memories of the discipline of slavery—and who has all the prejudices of caste and pride of family that were the natural results of the system; if the reader can imagine all this, he will find little difficulty in appreciating and sympathizing with the air of affectionate superiority which Uncle Remus assumes as he proceeds to unfold the mysteries of plantation lore to a little child who is a product of that practical reconstruction which has been going on to some extent since the war in spite of the politicians. Uncle Remus describes that reconstruction in his "Story of the War," and I may as well add here for the benefit of the curious that that story is almost literally true.
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CONTENTS.
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LEGENDS OF THE OLD PLANTATION.
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I.
UNCLE REMUS INITIATES THE LITTLE BOY.
One evening recently, the lady whom Uncle Remus calls "Miss Sally" missed her
little seven-year-old. Making search for him through the house and through the
yard, she heard the sound of voices in the old man's cabin, and, looking through
the window, saw the child sitting by Uncle Remus. His head rested against
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the old
man's arm, and he was gazing with an expression of the most intense interest into
the rough, weather-beaten face, that beamed so kindly upon him. This is what "Miss
Sally" heard:
"Bimeby, one day, arter Brer Fox bin doin' all dat he could fer ter ketch Brer Rabbit, en Brer Rabbit bin doin' all he could fer ter keep 'im fum it, Brer Fox say to hisse'f dat he'd put up a game on Brer Rabbit, en he ain't mo'n got de wuds out'n his mouf twel Brer Rabbit come a lopin' up de big road, lookin' des ez plump, en ez fat, en ez sassy ez a Moggin hoss in a barley-patch. "By and by, one day, after Brer Fox been doing all that he could for to catch Brer Rabbit, and Brer Rabbit been doing all he could for to keep him from it, Brer Fox say to hisself that he'd put up a game on Brer Rabbit, and he ain't more than got the words out of his mouth til Brer Rabbit come a loping up the big road, looking just as plump, and as fat, and as sassy as a Morgan horse in a barley-patch.
"'Hol' on dar, Brer Rabbit,' "'Hold on there Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. says Brer Fox, says he.
"'I ain't got time, Brer Fox,' "'I ain't got time, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, sorter mendin' his licks. says Brer Rabbit, says he, sort of mending his licks.
"'I wanter have some confab wid you, Brer Rabbit,' "'I want to have some confab with you, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. says Brer Fox, says he.
"'All right, Brer Fox, but you better holler fum whar you stan'. I'm monstus full er fleas dis mawnin',' "'All right, Brer Fox, but you better holler from where you stand. I'm monstrous full of fleas this morning,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'I seed Brer B'ar yistiddy,' "'I seed Brer Bar yesterday,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, says Brer Fox, says he, 'en he sorter rake me over de coals kaze you en me ain't make frens en live naberly, en I tole 'im dat I'd see you.' 'and he sort of rake me over the coals 'cause you and me ain't make friends and live neighborly, and I told him that I'd see you.'
"Den Brer Rabbit scratch one year wid his off hine-foot sorter jub'usly, en den he ups en sez, sezee: "Then Brer Rabbit scratch one ear with his off hind-foot sort of dubiously, and then he ups and says, says he:
"'All a settin', Brer Fox. Spose'n you drap roun' termorrer en take dinner wid me. We ain't got no great doin's at our house, but I speck de ole 'oman en de chilluns kin sorter scramble roun' en git up sump'n fer ter stay yo' stummuck.' "'All a setting, Brer Fox. Suppose you drop round termorrer and take dinner with me. We ain't got no great doings at our house, but I expect the old woman and the children can sort of scramble round and get up something for to stay your stomach.'
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"'I'm 'gree'ble, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'I'm agreeable, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Den I'll 'pen' on you,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Then I'll depend on you,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"Nex' day, Mr. Rabbit an' Miss Rabbit got up soon, 'fo' day, en raided on a gyarden like Miss Sally's out dar, en got some cabbiges, en some roas'n years, en some sparrer-grass, en dey fix up a smashin' dinner. Bimeby one er de little Rabbits, playin' out in de back-yard, come runnin' in hollerin', 'Oh, ma! oh, ma! I seed Mr. Fox a comin'!' En den Brer Rabbit he tuck de chilluns by der years en make um set down, en den him en Miss Rabbit sorter dally roun' waitin' for Brer Fox. En dey keep on waitin', but no Brer Fox ain't come. Atter 'while Brer Rabbit goes to de do', easy like, en peep out, en dar, stickin' out fum behime de cornder, wuz de tip-een' er Brer Fox tail. Den Brer Rabbit shot de do' en sot down, en put his paws behime his years en begin fer ter sing: "Next day, Mr. Rabbit and Miss Rabbit got up soon, before day, and raided on a garden like Miss Sally's out there, and got some cabbages, and some roasting ears, and some sparrer-grass, and they fix up a smashing dinner. By and by one of the little Rabbits, playing out in the back-yard, come runnin' in hollering, 'Oh, ma! oh, ma! I seed Mr. Fox a coming!' And then Brer Rabbit he took the children by their ears and make them set down, and then him and Miss Rabbit sort of dally round waiting for Brer Fox. And they keep on waiting, but no Brer Fox ain't come. After a while Brer Rabbit goes to the door, easy like, and peep out, and there, stickin' out from behind the corner, was the tip-end of Brer Fox tail. Then Brer Rabbit shut the door and sat down, and put his paws behind his ears and begin for to sing:
"Nex' day, Brer Fox sont word by Mr. Mink, en skuze hisse'f kaze he wuz too sick fer ter come, en he ax Brer Rabbit fer ter come en take dinner wid him, en Brer Rabbit say he wuz 'gree'ble. "Next day, Brer Fox sent word by Mr. Mink, and excuse hisself 'cause he was too sick for to come, and he ask Brer Rabbit for to come and take dinner with him, and Brer Rabbit say he was agreeable.
"Bimeby, w'en de shadders wuz at der shortes', Brer
Rabbit he sorter brush up en santer down ter Brer Fox's house, en w'en he
got dar, he yer somebody groanin', en he look in de do' en dar he see
Brer Fox settin' up in a
"By and by, when the shadows was at their shortest, Brer Rabbit he sort
of brush up and saunter down to Brer Fox's house, and when he got there,
he hear somebody groaning, and he look in the door and there he see Brer
Fox setting up in a
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rockin' cheer all wrop up wid flannil, en he look
mighty weak. Brer Rabbit look all 'roun', he did, but he ain't see no
dinner. De dish-pan wuz settin' on de table, en close by wuz a kyarvin'
knife.
rocking chair all wrap up with flannel, and he look mighty weak. Brer
Rabbit look all around, he did, but he ain't see no dinner. The dish-pan
was setting on the table, and close by was a carving knife.
"'Look like you gwineter have chicken fer dinner, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Look like you going to have chicken for dinner, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Yes, Brer Rabbit, deyer nice, en fresh, en tender,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Yes, Brer Rabbit, they're nice, and fresh, and tender,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"Den Brer Rabbit sorter pull his mustarsh, en say: 'You ain't got no calamus root, is you, Brer Fox? I done got so now dat I can't eat no chicken 'ceppin she's seasoned up wid calamus root.' En wid dat Brer Rabbit lipt out er de do' and dodge 'mong de bushes, en sot dar watchin' fer Brer Fox; en he ain't watch long, nudder, kaze Brer Fox flung off de flannil en crope out er de house en got whar he could close in on Brer Rabbit, en bimeby Brer Rabbit holler out: 'Oh, Brer Fox! I'll des put yo' calamus root out yer on dish yer stump. Better come git it while hit's fresh,' and wid dat Brer Rabbit gallop off home. En Brer Fox ain't never kotch 'im yit, en w'at's mo', honey, he ain't gwineter." "Then Brer Rabbit sort of pull his moustache, and say: 'You ain't got no calamus root, is you, Brer Fox? I done got so now that I can't eat no chicken excepting she's seasoned up with calamus root.' And with that Brer Rabbit leaped out of the door and dodge among the bushes, and sat there watching for Brer Fox; and he ain't watch long, neither, 'cause Brer Fox flung off the flannel and crept out of the house and got where he could close in on Brer Rabbit, and by and by Brer Rabbit holler out: 'Oh, Brer Fox! I'll just put your calamus root out here on this here stump. Better come get it while it's fresh,' and with that Brer Rabbit gallop off home. And Brer Fox ain't never catch him yet, and what's more, honey, he ain't going to."
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II.
THE WONDERFUL TAR-BABY STORY.
"Didn't the fox never catch the rabbit, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy the next evening.
"He come mighty nigh it, honey, sho's you bawn—Brer
Fox did. One day atter Brer Rabbit fool 'im wid dat calamus root, Brer
Fox went ter wuk en got 'im some
"He come mighty nigh it, honey, sure as you born—Brer
Fox did. One day after Brer Rabbit fool him with that calamus root, Brer
Fox went to work and got him some
tar, en mix it wid some turkentime, en fix up a
contrapshun wat he call a Tar-Baby, en he tuck dish yer Tar-Baby en he
sot 'er in de big road, en den he lay off in de bushes fer ter see wat de
news wuz gwineter be. En he didn't hatter wait long, nudder, kaze bimeby
here come Brer Rabbit
tar, and mix it with some turpentine, and fix up a
contraption what he call a Tar-Baby, and he took this here Tar-Baby and
he sat her in the big road, and then he lay off in the bushes for to see
what the news was going to be. And he didn't have to wait long, neither,
'cause by and by here come Brer Rabbit
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pacin' down de road—lippity-clippity,
clippity-lippity—dez ez sassy ez a jay-bird. Brer Fox, he lay low. Brer
Rabbit come prancin' 'long twel he spy de Tar-Baby, en den he fotch up on
his behime legs like he wuz 'stonished. De Tar-Baby, she sot dar, she
did, en Brer Fox, he lay low.
pacing down the road—lippity-clippity,
clippity-lippity—just as sassy as a jay-bird. Brer Fox, he lay low. Brer
Rabbit come prancing along til he spy the Tar-Baby, and then he fetch up
on his behind legs like he was astonished. The Tar-Baby, she sat there,
she did, and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"'Mawnin'!' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee—'nice wedder dis mawnin',' sezee. "'Morning!' says Brer Rabbit, says he—'nice weather this morning,' says he.
"Tar-Baby ain't sayin' nuthin', en Brer Fox, he lay low. "Tar Baby ain't saying nothing, and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"'How duz yo' sym'tums seem ter segashuate?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'How does your symptoms seem to segashuate?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"Brer Fox, he wink his eye slow, en lay low, en de Tar-Baby, she ain't sayin' nuthin'. "Brer Fox, he wink his eye slow, and lay low, and the Tar-Baby, she ain't saying nothing.
"'How you come on, den? Is you deaf?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'Kaze if you is, I kin holler louder,' sezee. "'How you come on, then? Is you deaf?' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'Cause if you is, I can holler louder,' says he.
"Tar-Baby stay still, en Brer Fox, he lay low. "Tar-Baby stay still, and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"'Youer stuck up, dat's w'at you is,' says Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en I'm gwineter kyore you, dat's w'at I'm a gwineter do,' sezee. "'You're stuck up, that's what you is,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and I'm going to cure you, that's what I'm a going to do,' says he.
"Brer Fox, he sorter chuckle in his stummuck, he did, but Tar-Baby ain't sayin' nuthin'. "Brer Fox, he sort of chuckle in his stomach, he did, but Tar-Baby ain't saying nothing.'
"'I'm gwineter larn you howter talk ter 'specttubble fokes ef hit's de las' ack,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'Ef you don't take off dat hat en tell me howdy, I'm gwineter bus' you wide open,' sezee. "'I'm going to learn you how to talk to respectable folks if it's the last act,' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'If you don't take off that hat and tell me howdy, I'm going to bust you wide open,' says he.
"Tar-Baby stay still, en Brer Fox, he lay low. "Tar Baby stay still, and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"Brer Rabbit keep on axin' 'im, en de Tar-Baby, she
keep on sayin' nuthin', twel present'y Brer Rabbit draw back wid his
fis', he did, en blip he tuck 'er side er de
"Brer Rabbit keep on asking him, and the Tar Baby, she keep on saying
nothing, til presently Brer Rabbit draw back with his fist, he did, and
blip he took her side of the
har1880.2007.001.0033.jpg
head. Right dar's whar he broke his merlasses jug.
His fis' stuck, en he can't pull loose. De tar hilt 'im. But Tar-Baby,
she stay still, en Brer Fox, he lay low.
head. Right there's where he broke his molasses jug. His fist stuck,
and he can't pull loose. The tar held him. But Tar-Baby, she stay still,
and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"'Ef you don't lemme loose, I'll knock you agin,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, en wid dat he fotch 'er a wipe wid de udder han', en dat stuck. Tar-Baby, she ain't sayin' nuthin', en. Brer Fox, he lay low. "'If you don't let me loose, I'll knock you again,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, and with that he fetch her a wipe with the other hand, and that stuck. Tar Baby, she ain't saying nothing, and Brer Fox, he lay low.
"'Tu'n me loose, fo' I kick de natal stuffin' outen you,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, but de Tar-Baby, she ain't sayin' nuthin'. She des hilt on, en den Brer Rabbit lose de use er his feet in de same way. Brer Fox, he lay low. Den Brer Rabbit squall out dat ef de Tar-Baby don't tu'n 'im loose he butt 'er cranksided. En den he butted, en his head got stuck. Den Brer Fox, he sa'ntered fort', lookin' des ez innercent ez wunner yo' mammy's mockin'-birds. "'Turn me loose, before I kick the natural stuffing out of you,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, but the Tar-Baby, she ain't saying nothing. She just held on, and then Brer Rabbit lose the use of his feet in the same way. Brer Fox, he lay low. Then Brer Rabbit squall out that if the Tar-Baby don't turn him loose he butt her cranksided. And then he butted, and his head got stuck. Then Brer Fox, he sauntered forth, looking just as innocent as one of your mammy's mocking birds.
"'Howdy, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. 'You look sorter stuck up dis mawnin',' sezee, en den he rolled on de groun', en laft en laft twel he couldn't laff no mo'. 'I speck you'll take dinner wid me dis time, Brer Rabbit. I done laid in some calamus root, en I ain't gwineter take no skuse,' sez Brer Fox, sezee." "'Howdy, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Fox, says he. 'You look sort of stuck up this morning,' says he, and then he rolled on the ground, and laughed and laughed til he couldn't laugh no more. 'I expect you'll take dinner with me this time, Brer Rabbit. I done laid in some calamus root, and I ain't going to take no excuse,' says Brer Fox, says he."
Here Uncle Remus paused, and drew a two-pound yam out of the ashes.
"Did the fox eat the rabbit?" asked the little boy to whom the story had been told.
"Dat's all de fur de tale goes," "That's all the far the tale goes," replied the old man. "He mout, en den agin he moutent. Some say Jedge B'ar come 'long en loosed 'im—some say he didn't. I hear Miss Sally callin'. You better run 'long." "He might, and then again he might not. Some say Judge Bear come along and loosed him—some say he didn't. I hear Miss Sally calling. You better run along."
har1880.2007.001.0034.jpg
III.
WHY MR. POSSUM LOVES PEACE.
"ONE night," said Uncle Remus—taking Miss Sally's little boy on his knee, and stroking the child's hair thoughtfully and caressingly— "one night Brer Possum call by fer Brer Coon, 'cordin' ter greement, en atter gobblin' up a dish er fried greens en smokin' a seegyar, dey rambled fort' fer ter see how de ballunce er de settlement wuz gittin' 'long. Brer Coon, he wuz wunner deze yer natchul pacers, en he racked 'long same ez Mars John's bay pony, en Brer Possum he went in a han'-gallup; en dey got over heap er groun', mon. Brer Possum, he got his belly full er 'simmons, en Brer Coon, he scoop up a 'bunnunce er frogs en tadpoles. Dey amble 'long, dey did, des ez soshubble ez a baskit er kittens, twel bimeby dey hear Mr. Dog talkin' ter hisse'f way off in de woods. "one night Brer Possum call by for Brer Coon, according to agreement, and after gobbling up a dish of fried greens and smoking a cigar, they rambled forth for to see how the balance of the settlement was getting along. Brer Coon, he was one of these here natural pacers, and he racked along same as Master John's bay pony, and Brer Possum he went in a hand-gallop; and they got over heap of ground, man. Brer Possum, he got his belly full of persimmons, and Brer Coon, he scoop up a abundance of frogs and tadpoles. They amble along, they did, just as socialble as a basket of kittens, til by and by they hear Mr. Dog talking to hisself way off in the woods.
"'Spozen he runs up on us, Brer Possum, w'at you gwineter do?' sez Brer Coon, sezee. Brer Possum sorter laff 'round de cornders un his mouf. "'Supposing he runs up on us, Brer Possum, what you going to do?' says Brer Coon, says he. Brer Possum sort of laugh around the corners of his mouth.
"'Oh, ef he come, Brer Coon, I'm gwineter stan' by you,' sez Brer Possum. 'W'at you gwineter do?' sezee. "'Oh, if he come, Brer Coon, I'm going to stand by you,' says Brer Possum. 'What you going to do?' says he.
"'Who? me?' sez Brer Coon. 'Ef he run up onter me, I lay I give 'im one twis',' sezee." "'Who? me?' says Brer Coon. 'If he run up onto me, I lay I give him one twist,' says he."
"Did the dog come?" asked the little boy.
"Go 'way, honey!"
"Go away, honey!"
responded the old man, in an impressive tone.
"Go way! Mr. Dog, he come en he come a zoonin'. En
he ain't wait fer ter say howdy, nudder.
"Go away! Mr. Dog, he come and he come a zooning. And he ain't wait for
to say howdy, neither.
har1880.2007.001.0035.jpg
He des sail inter de two un um. De ve'y fus pas he
make Brer Possum fetch a grin fum year ter year, en keel over like he wuz
dead. Den Mr. Dog, he sail inter Brer Coon, en right dar's whar he drap
his munnypus, kaze Brer Coon wuz cut out fer dat kinder bizness, en he
fa'rly wipe up de face er de earf wid 'im. You better b'leeve dat w'en
Mr. Dog got a chance to make hisse'f skase he tuck it, en w'at der wuz
lef' un him went skaddlin' thoo de woods like hit wuz shot outen a
muskit. En Brer Coon, he sorter lick his cloze inter shape en rack off,
en Brer Possum, he lay dar like he wuz dead, twel bimeby he raise up
sotter keerful like, en w'en he fine de coas' cle'r he scramble up en
scamper off like sumpin was atter 'im."
He just sail into the two of them. The very first pass he make Brer
Possum fetch a grin from ear to ear, and keel over like he was dead. Then
Mr. Dog, he sail into Brer Coon, and right there's where he drop his
moneypurse, 'cause Brer Coon was cut out for that kind of business, and
he fairly wipe up the face of the earth with him. You better believe that
when Mr. Dog got a chance to make hisself scarce he took it, and what
there was left of him went scattering through the woods like it was shot
out of a musket. And Brer Coon, he sort of lick his clothes into shape
and rack off, and Brer Possum, he lay there like he was dead, til by and
by he raise up sort of careful like, and when he find the coast clear he
scramble up and scamper off like something was after him."
Here Uncle Remus paused long enough to pick up a live coal of fire in his fingers, transfer it to the palm of his hand, and thence to his clay pipe, which he had been filling—a proceeding that was viewed by the little boy with undisguised admiration. The old man then proceeded:
"Nex' time Brer Possum meet Brer Coon, Brer Coon 'fuse ter 'spon' ter his howdy, en dis make Brer Possum feel mighty bad, seein' ez how dey useter make so many 'scurshuns tergedder. "Next time Brer Possum meet Brer Coon, Brer Coon refuse to respond to his howdy, and this make Brer Possum feel mighty bad, seeing as how they used to make so many excursions together.
"'W'at make you hol' yo' head so high, Brer Coon?' sez Brer Possum, sezee. "'What make you hold your head so high, Brer Coon?' says Brer Possum, says he.
"'I ain't runnin' wid cowerds deze days,' sez Brer Coon. 'W'en I wants you I'll sen' fer you,' sezee. "'I ain't running with cowards these days,' says Brer Coon. 'When I wants you I'll send for you,' says he.
"Den Brer Possum git mighty mad. "Then Brer Possum get mighty mad.
"'Who's enny cowerd,' sezee. "'Who's any coward,' says he.
"'You is,' sez Brer Coon,
'dat's who. I ain't soshatin'
"'You is,' says Brer Coon, 'that's who. I ain't associating
har1880.2007.001.0036.jpg
wid dem w'at lies down on de
groun' en plays dead w'en dar's a free fight gwine on,' sezee.
with them what lies down on the ground and plays
dead when there's a free fight going on,' says he.
"Den Brer Possum grin en laff fit to kill hisse'f. "Then Brer Possum grin and laugh fit to kill hisself.
"'Lor', Brer Coon, you don't speck I done dat kaze I wuz 'feared, duz you?' sezee. 'W'y I want no mo' 'feared dan you is dis minnit. W'at wuz dey fer ter be skeered un?' sezee. 'I know'd you'd git away wid Mr. Dog ef I didn't, en I des lay dar watchin' you shake him, waitin' fer ter put in w'en de time come,' sezee. "'Lord, Brer Coon, you don't expect I done that 'cause I was afeared, does you?' says he. 'Why I wasn't no more afeared than you is this minute. What was there for to be scared of?' says he. 'I know'd you'd get away with Mr. Dog if I didn't, and I just lay there watching you shake him, waiting for to put in when the time come,' says he.
"Brer Coon tu'n up his nose. "Brer Coon turn up his nose.
"'Dat's a mighty likely tale,' sezee, 'w'en Mr. Dog ain't mo'n tech you 'fo' you keel over, en lay dar stiff,' sezee. "'That's a mighty likely tale,' says he, 'when Mr. Dog ain't more than touch you before you keel over, and lay there stiff,' says he.
"'Dat's des w'at I wuz gwineter tell you 'bout,' sez Brer Possum, sezee. 'I want no mo' skeer'd dan you is right now, en' I wuz fixin' fer ter give Mr. Dog a sample er my jaw,' sezee, 'but I'm de most ticklish chap w'at you ever laid eyes on, en no sooner did Mr. Dog put his nose down yer 'mong my ribs dan I got ter laffin, en I laft twel I ain't had no use er my lim's,' sezee, 'en it's a mussy unto Mr. Dog dat I wuz ticklish, kaze a little mo' en I'd e't 'im up,' sezee. 'I don't mine fightin', Brer Coon, no mo' dan you duz,' sezee, 'but I declar' ter grashus ef I kin stan' ticklin'. Git me in a row whar dey ain't no ticklin' 'lowed, en I'm your man,' sezee. "'That's just what I was going to tell you about,' says Brer Possum, says he. 'I wasn't no more scared than you is right now, and I was fixing for to give Mr. Dog a sample of my jaw,' says he, 'but I'm the most ticklish chap what you ever laid eyes on, and no sooner did Mr. Dog put his nose down here among my ribs than I got to laughing, and I laughed til I ain't had no use of my limbs,' says he, 'and it's a mercy unto Mr. Dog that I was ticklish, 'cause a little more and I'd ate him up,' says he. 'I don't mind fighting, Brer Coon, no more than you does,' says he, 'but I declare to gracious if I can stand tickling. Get me in a row where they ain't no tickling allowed, and I'm your man,' says he.
"En down ter dis day" "And down to this day" —continued Uncle Remus, watching the smoke from his pipe curl upward over the little boy's head— "down ter dis day, Brer Possum's bound ter s'render w'en you tech him in de short ribs, en he'll laff ef he knows he's gwineter be smashed fer it." "down to this day, Brer Possum's bound to surrender when you touch him in the short ribs, and he'll laugh if he knows he's going to be smashed for it."
har1880.2007.001.0037.jpg
IV.
HOW MR. RABBIT WAS TOO SHARP FOR MR. FOX.
"UNCLE REMUS," said the little boy one evening, when he had found the old man with little or nothing to do, "did the fox kill and eat the rabbit when he caught him with the Tar-Baby?"
"Law, honey, ain't I tell you 'bout dat?" "Lord, honey, ain't I tell you about that?" replied the old darkey, chuckling slyly. "I 'clar ter grashus I ought er tole you dat, but ole man Nod wuz ridin' on my eyeleds 'twel a leetle mo'n I'd a dis'member'd my own name, en den on to dat here come yo' mammy hollerin' atter you. "I declare to gracious I ought have told you that, but old man Nod was riding on my eyelids til a little more and I'd a disremembered my own name, and then on to that here come your mammy hollering after you.
"W'at I tell you w'en I fus' begin? I tole you Brer Rabbit wuz a monstus soon beas'; leas'ways dat's w'at I laid out fer ter tell you. Well, den, honey, don't you go en make no udder kalkalashuns, kaze in dem days Brer Rabbit en his fambly wuz at de head er de gang w'en enny racket wuz on han', en dar dey stayed. 'Fo' you begins fer ter wipe yo' eyes 'bout Brer Rabbit, you wait en see whar'bouts Brer Rabbit gwineter fetch up at. But dat's needer yer ner dar. "What I tell you when I first begin? I told you Brer Rabbit was a monstrous soon beast; leastways that's what I laid out for to tell you. Well, then, honey, don't you go and make no other calculations, 'cause in them days Brer Rabbit and his family was at the head of the gang when any racket was on hand, and there they stayed. Before you begins for to wipe your eyes about Brer Rabbit, you wait and see whereabouts Brer Rabbit going to fetch up at. But that's neither here nor there.
"W'en Brer Fox fine Brer Rabbit mixt up wid de Tar-Baby, he feel mighty good, en he roll on de groun' en laff. Bimeby he up'n say, sezee: "When Brer Fox find Brer Rabbit mixed up with the Tar-Baby, he feel mighty good, and he roll on the ground and laugh. By and by he up and say, says he:
"'Well, I speck I got you dis
time, Brer Rabbit,' sezee; 'maybe I ain't, but
I speck I is. You been runnin' roun' here sassin' atter me a mighty
long time, but I speck you done come ter de een' er de row. You bin
cuttin' up yo'
"'Well, I expect I got you this time, Brer
Rabbit,' says he; 'maybe I ain't, but I expect I
is. You been running around here sassing after me a mighty long time,
but I speck you done come to the end of the row. You been cutting up
your
har1880.2007.001.0038.jpg
capers en bouncin' 'roun' in dis
naberhood ontwel you come ter b'leeve yo'se'f de boss er de whole
gang. En den youer allers some'rs whar you got no bizness,' sez
Brer Fox, sezee. 'Who ax you fer ter come en strike up
a 'quaintence wid dish yer Tar-Baby? En who stuck you up dar whar you
iz? Nobody in de roun' worril. You des tuck en jam yo'se'f on dat
Tar-Baby widout waitin' fer enny invite,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'en dar you is, en dar you'll stay twel I fixes up a
bresh-pile and fires her up, kaze I'm gwineter bobbycue you dis day,
sho,' sez Brer Fox, sezee.
capers and bouncing around in this neighborhood
until you come to believe yourself the boss of the whole gang. And
then you're always somewheres where you got no business,' says
Brer Fox, says he. 'Who ask you for to come and strike
up a acquaintance with this here Tar-Baby? And who stuck you up there
where you is? Nobody in the round world. You just took and jam
yourself on that Tar-Baby without waiting for any invite,' says
Brer Fox, says he, 'and there you is, and there you'll
stay til I fixes up a brush-pile and fires her up, 'cause I'm going to
barbecue you this day, sure,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"Den Brer Rabbit talk mighty 'umble. "Then Brer Rabbit talk mighty humble.
"'I don't keer w'at you do wid me, Brer Fox,' sezee, 'so you don't fling me in dat brier-patch. Roas' me, Brer Fox,' sezee, 'but don't fling me in dat brier-patch,' sezee. "'I don't care what you do with me, Brer Fox,' says he, 'so you don't fling me in that briar-patch. Roast me, Brer Fox,' says he, 'but don't fling me in that briar-patch,' says he.
"'Hit's so much trouble fer ter kindle a fier,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'dat I speck I'll hatter hang you,' sezee. "'It's so much trouble for to kindle a fire,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'that I expect I'll have to hang you,' says he.
"'Hang me des ez high as you please, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'but do fer de Lord's sake don't fling me in dat brier-patch,' sezee. "'Hang me just as high as you please, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'but do for the Lord's sake don't fling me in that briar-patch,' says he.
"'I ain't got no string,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'en now I speck I'll hatter drown you,' sezee. "'I ain't got no string,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'and now I expect I'll have to drown you,' says he.
"'Drown me des ez deep ez you please, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'but do don't fling me in dat brier-patch,' sezee. "'Drown me just as deep as you please, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'but do don't fling me in that briar-patch,' says he.
"'Dey ain't no water nigh,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'en now I speck I'll hatter skin you,' sezee. "'There ain't no water nigh,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'and now I expect I'll have to skin you,' says he.
"'Skin me, Brer Fox,' sez
Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'snatch out my eyeballs, t'ar
out my years by de roots, en cut off
"'Skin me, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says
he, 'snatch out my eyeballs, tear out my ears by
the roots, and cut off
har1880.2007.001.0039.jpg
my legs,' sezee, 'but do please, Brer Fox, don't fling me in dat
brier-patch,' sezee.
my legs,' says he, 'but
do please, Brer Fox, don't fling me in that briar-patch,' says
he.
"Co'se Brer Fox wanter hurt Brer Rabbit bad ez he kin, so he cotch 'im by de behime legs en slung 'im right in de middle er de brier-patch. Dar wuz a considerbul flutter whar Brer Rabbit struck de bushes, en Brer Fox sorter hang 'roun' fer ter see w'at wuz gwineter happen. Bimeby he hear somebody call 'im, en way up de hill he see Brer Rabbit settin' cross-legged on a chinkapin log koamin' de pitch outen his har wid a chip. Den Brer Fox know dat he bin swop off mighty bad. Brer Rabbit wuz bleedzed fer ter fling back some er his sass, en he holler out: "Course Brer Fox want to hurt Brer Rabbit bad as he can, so he catch him by the behind legs and slung him right in the middle of the briar-patch. There was a considerable flutter where Brer Rabbit struck the bushes, and Brer Fox sort of hang around for to see what was going to happen. By and by he hear somebody call him, and way up the hill he see Brer Rabbit setting cross-legged on a chincapin log combing the pitch out of his hair with a chip. Then Brer Fox know that he been swap off mighty bad. Brer Rabbit was pleased for to fling back some of his sass, and he holler out:
"'Bred en bawn in a brier-patch, Brer Fox—bred en bawn in a brier-patch!' en wid dat he skip out des ez lively ez a cricket in de embers." "'Bred and born in a briar-patch, Brer Fox—bred and born in a briar-patch!' and with that he skip out just as lively as a cricket in the embers."
V.
THE STORY OF THE DELUGE AND HOW IT CAME ABOUT.
"ONE time," said Uncle Remus—adjusting his spectacles so
as to be able to see how to thread a large darning-needle with which he was
patching his coat—
"one time, way back yander, 'fo' you wuz borned,
honey, en 'fo' Mars John er Miss Sally wuz borned—way back yander 'fo'
enny
"one time, way back yonder, before you was borned, honey, and before
Master John or Miss Sally was borned—way back yonder before any
har1880.2007.001.0040.jpg
un us wuz borned, de anemils en
de beasteses sorter 'lecshuneer roun' 'mong deyselves, twel at las' dey'
greed fer ter have a 'sembly. In dem days," continued the old man,
observing a look of incredulity on the little boy's face, "in dem days creeturs had lots mo' sense dan dey got
now; let 'lone dat, dey had sense same like folks. Hit was tech en go wid
um, too, mon, en w'en dey make up dere mines w'at hatter be done, 'twant
mo'n menshun'd 'fo' hit wuz done. Well, dey 'lected dat dey hatter hole
er 'sembly fer ter sorter straighten out marters en yer de complaints, en
w'en de day come dey wuz on han'. De Lion, he wuz dere, kaze he wuz de
king, en he hatter be dere. De Rhynossyhoss, he wuz dere, en de Elephent,
he wuz dere, en de Cammils, en de Cows, en plum down ter de Crawfishes,
dey wuz dere. Dey wuz all dere. En w'en de Lion shuck his mane, en tuck
his seat in de big cheer, den de sesshun begun fer ter commence."
of us was borned, the animals and the beasts sort of
electioneer around among theyselves, til at last they agreed for to have
a assembly. In them days," continued the old man, observing a look of
incredulity on the little boy's face, "in them days
creatures had lots more sense than they got now; let alone that, they had
sense same like folks. It was touch and go with them, too, man, and when
they make up their minds what had to be done, it wasn't more than
mentioned before it was done. Well, they elected that they had to hold an
assembly for to sort of straighten out matters and hear the complaints,
and when the day come they was on hand. The Lion, he was there, 'cause he
was the king, and he had to be there. The Rhinoceros, he was there, and
the Elephant, he was there, and the Camels, and the Cows, and plum down
to the Crawfishes, they was there. They was all there. And when the Lion
shook his mane, and took his seat in the big chair, then the session
begun for to commence."
"What did they do, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"I kin skacely call to mine 'zackly wa't dey did do, but dey spoke speeches, en hollered, en cusst, en flung der langwidge 'roun' des like w'en yo' daddy wuz gwineter run fer de legislater en got lef'. Howsomever, dey 'ranged der 'fairs, en splained der bizness. Bimeby, w'ile dey wuz 'sputin' 'longer wunner nudder, de Elephent tromped on wunner de Crawfishes. Co'se w'en dat creetur put his foot down, w'atsumever's under dere's bound fer ter be squshed, en dey wuzn't nuff er dat Crawfish lef' fer ter tell dat he'd bin dar. "I can scarcely call to mind exactly what they did do, but they spoke speeches, and hollered, and cussed, and flung their language around just like when your daddy was going to run for the legislature and got left. Howsoever, they arranged their affairs, and explained their business. By and by, while they was disputing along with one another, the Elephant tromped on one of the Crawfishes. Course when that creature put his foot down, whatsoever's under there's bound for to be squished, and they wasn't enough of that Crawfish left for to tell that he'd been there.
har1880.2007.001.0041.jpg
"Dis make de udder Crawfishes mighty mad, en dey sorter swawmed tergedder en draw'd up a kinder peramble wid some wharfo'es in it, en read her out in de 'sembly. But, bless grashus! sech a racket wuz a gwine on dat nobody ain't hear it, 'ceppin may be de Mud Turkle en de Spring Lizzud, en dere enfloons wuz pow'ful lackin'. "This make the other Crawfishes mighty mad, and they sort of swarmed together and drawed up a kind of preamble with some wherefores in it, and read her out in the assembly. But, bless gracious! such a racket was a going on that nobody ain't hear it, excepting maybe the Mud Turtle and the Spring Lizard, and their influence was powerful lacking.
"Bimeby, w'iles de Nunicorn wuz 'sputin' wid de Lion, en w'ile de Hyener wuz a laffin ter hisse'f, de Elephent squshed anudder one er de Crawfishes, en a little mo'n he'd er ruint de Mud Turkle. Den de Crawfishes, w'at dey wuz lef' un um, swawmed tergedder en draw'd up anudder peramble wid sum mo' wharfo'es; but dey might ez well er sung Ole Dan Tucker ter a harrycane. De udder creeturs wuz too bizzy wid der fussin' fer ter 'spon' unto de Crawfishes. So dar dey wuz, de Crawfishes, en dey didn't know w'at minnit wuz gwineter be de nex'; en dey kep' on gittin madder en madder en skeerder en skeerder, twel bimeby dey gun de wink ter de Mud Turkle en de Spring Lizzud, en den dey bo'd little holes in de groun' en went down outer sight." "By and by, while the Unicorn was disputing with the Lion, and while the Hyena was a laughing to hisself, the Elephant squished another one of the Crawfishes, and a little more and he'd of ruined the Mud Turtle. Then the Crawfishes, what there was left of them, swarmed together and drawed up another preamble with some more wherefores; but they might as well have sung Old Dan Tucker to a hurricane. The other creatures was too busy with their fussing for to respond unto the Crawfishes. So there they was, the Crawfishes, and they didn't know what minute was going to be the next; and they kept on getting madder and madder and scareder and scareder, til by and by they begun to wink to the Mud Turtle and the Spring Lizard and then they bored little holes in the ground and went down out of sight."
"Who did, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"De Crawfishes, honey. Dey bo'd inter de groun' en kep' on bo'in twel dey onloost de fountains er de earf; en de waters squirt out, en riz higher en higher twel de hills wuz kivvered, en de creeturs wuz all drownded; en all bekaze dey let on 'mong deyselves dat dey wuz bigger dan de Crawfishes." "The Crawfishes, honey. They bored into the ground and kept on boring til they unloosed the fountains of the earth; and the waters squirt out, and rise higher and higher til the hills was covered, and the creatures was all drownded; and all because they let on among theyselves that they was bigger than the Crawfishes."
Then the old man blew the ashes from a smoking yam, and proceeded to remove the peeling.
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"Where was the ark, Uncle Remus?" the little boy inquired, presently.
"W'ich ark's dat?" "Which ark's that?" asked the old man, in a tone of well-feigned curiosity.
"Noah's ark," replied the child.
"Don't you pester wid ole man Noah, honey. I boun' he tuck keer er dat ark. Dat's w'at he wuz dere fer, en dat's w'at he done. Leas'ways, dat's w'at dey tells me. But don't you bodder longer dat ark, 'ceppin' your mammy fetches it up. Dey mout er bin two deloojes, en den agin dey moutent. Ef dey wuz enny ark in dish yer w'at de Crawfishes brung on, I ain't heern tell un it, en w'en dey ain't no arks 'roun, I ain't got no time fer ter make um en put um in dere. Hit's gittin' yo' bedtime, honey." "Don't you pester with old man Noah, honey. I bound he took care of that ark. That's what he was there for, and that's what he done. Leastways, that's what they tells me. But don't you bother longer that ark, excepting your mammy fetches it up. They might have been two deluges, and then again they might not. If they was any ark in this here what the Crawfishes brung on, I ain't heard tell of it, and when they ain't no arks around, I ain't got no time for to make them and put them in there. It's getting your bedtime, honey."
VI.
MR. RABBIT GROSSLY DECEIVES MR. FOX.
ONE evening when the little boy, whose nights with Uncle Remus are as entertaining
as those Arabian ones of blessed memory, had finished supper and hurried out to
sit with his venerable patron, he found the old man in great glee. Indeed, Uncle
Remus was talking and laughing to himself at such a rate that the little boy was
afraid he had company. The truth is, Uncle Remus had heard the child coming, and,
when the rosy-cheeked chap put his head in
har1880.2007.001.0043.jpg
at the door, was engaged in a
monologue, the burden of which seemed to be—
As a matter of course this vague allusion reminded the little boy of the fact that the wicked Fox was still in pursuit of the Rabbit, and he immediately put his curiosity in the shape of a question.
"Uncle Remus, did the Rabbit have to go clean away when he got loose from the Tar-Baby?"
"Bless grashus, honey, dat he didn't. Who? Him? You dunno nuthin' 'tall 'bout Brer Rabbit ef dat's de way you puttin' 'im down. W'at he gwine 'way fer? He mouter stayed sorter close twel de pitch rub off'n his ha'r, but twern't menny days 'fo' he wuz lopin' up en down de naberhood same ez ever, en I dunno ef he wern't mo' sassier dan befo'. "Bless gracious, honey, that he didn't. Who? Him? You don't know nothing at all about Brer Rabbit if that's the way you putting him down. What he going away for? He might have stayed sort of close til the pitch rub off of his hair, but it weren't many days before he was loping up and down the neighborhood same as ever, and I don't know if he weren't more sassier than before.
"Seem like dat de tale 'bout how he got mixt up wid de Tar-Baby got 'roun' 'mongst de nabers. Leas'ways, Miss Meadows en de gals got win' un' it, en de nex' time Brer Rabbit paid um a visit Miss Meadows tackled 'im 'bout it, en de gals sot up a monstus gigglement. Brer Rabbit, he sot up des ez cool ez a cowcumber, he did, en let 'em run on." "Seem like that the tale about how he got mixed up with the Tar-Baby got around amongst the neighbors. Leastways, Miss Meadows and the gals got wind of it, and the next time Brer Rabbit paid them a visit Miss Meadows tackled him about it, and the gals set up a monstrous gigglement. Brer Rabbit, he sat up just as cool as a cucumber, he did, and let them run on."
"Who was Miss Meadows, Uncle Remus?" inquired the little boy.
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"Don't ax me, honey. She wuz in de tale, Miss Meadows en de gals wuz, en de tale I give you like hi't wer' gun ter me. Brer Rabbit, he sot dar, he did, sorter lam' like, en den bimeby he cross his legs, he did, and wink his eye slow, en up en say, sezee: "Don't ask me, honey. She was in the tale, Miss Meadows and the gals was, and the tale I give you like it were given to me. Brer Rabbit, he sat there, he did, sort of lamb like, and then by and by he cross his legs, he did, and wink his eye slow, and up and say, says he:
"'Ladies, Brer Fox wuz my daddy's ridin'-hoss fer thirty year; maybe mo', but thirty year dat I knows un,' sezee; en den he paid um his 'specks, en tip his beaver, en march off, he did, des ez stiff en ez stuck up ez a fire-stick. "'Ladies, Brer Fox was my daddy's riding-horse for thirty year; maybe more, but thirty year that I knows of,' says he; and then he paid them his respects, and tip his beaver, and march off, he did, just as stiff and as stuck up as a fire-stick.
"Nex' day, Brer Fox cum a callin', and w'en he gun fer ter laff 'bout Brer Rabbit, Miss Meadows en de gals, dey ups en tells 'im 'bout w'at Brer Rabbit say. Den Brer Fox grit his toof sho' nuff, he did, en he look mighty dumpy, but w'en he riz fer ter go he up en say, sezee: "Next day, Brer Fox come a calling, and when he begun for to laugh about Brer Rabbit, Miss Meadows and the gals, they ups and tells him about what Brer Rabbit say. Then Brer Fox grit his tooth sure enough, he did, and he look mighty dumpy, but when he rise for to go he up and say, says he:
"'Ladies, I ain't 'sputin' w'at you say, but I'll make Brer Rabbit chaw up his words en spit um out right yer whar you kin see 'im,' sezee; en wid dat off Brer Fox marcht. "'Ladies, I ain't disputing what you say, but I'll make Brer Rabbit chew up his words and spit them out right here where you can see them,' says he; and with that off Brer Fox marched.
"En w'en he got in de big road, he shuck de dew off'n his tail, en made a straight shoot fer Brer Rabbit's house. W'en he got dar, Brer Rabbit wuz spectin' un 'im, en de do' wuz shet fas'. Brer Fox knock. Nobody ain't ans'er. Brer Fox knock. Nobody ans'er. Den he knock agin—blam! blam! Den Brer Rabbit holler out mighty weak: "And when he got in the big road, he shook the dew off of his tail, and made a straight shoot for Brer Rabbit's house. When he got there, Brer Rabbit was expecting of him, and the door was shut fast. Brer Fox knock. Nobody ain't answer. Brer Fox knock. Nobody answer. Then he knock again—blam! blam! Then Brer Rabbit holler out mighty weak:
"'Is dat you, Brer Fox? I want you ter run en fetch de doctor. Dat bait er pusly w'at I e't dis mawnin' is gittin' 'way wid me. Do, please, Brer Fox, run quick,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Is that you, Brer Fox? I want you to run and fetch the doctor. That bait of parsley what I ate this morning is getting away with me. Do, please, Brer Fox, run quick,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'I come atter you, Brer
Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee.
"'I come after you, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Fox,
says he.
har1880.2007.001.0045.jpg
'Dere's gwineter be a party up
at Miss Meadows's,' sezee. 'All de gals 'll be
dere, en I promus' dat I'd fetch you. De gals, dey 'lowed dat hit
wouldn't be no party 'ceppin' I fotch you,' sez Brer Fox, sezee.
'There's going to be a party up at Miss
Meadows's,' says he. 'All the gals will be there,
and I promised that I'd fetch you. The gals, they allowed that it
wouldn't be no party excepting I fetch you,' says Brer Fox, says
he.
"Den Brer Rabbit say he wuz too sick, en Brer Fox say he wuzzent, en dar dey had it up and down, 'sputin' en contendin'. Brer Rabbit say he can't walk. Brer Fox say he tote 'im. Brer Rabbit say how? Brer Fox say in his arms. Brer Rabbit say he drap 'im. Brer Fox 'low he won't. Bimeby Brer Rabbit say he go ef Brer Fox tote 'im on his back. Brer Fox say he would. Brer Rabbit say he can't ride widout a saddle. Brer Fox say he git de saddle. Brer Rabbit say he can't set in saddle less he have bridle fer ter hol' by. Brer Fox say he git de bridle. Brer Rabbit say he can't ride widout bline bridle, kaze Brer Fox be shyin' at stumps 'long de road, en fling 'im off. Brer Fox say he git bline bridle. Den Brer Rabbit say he go. Den Brer Fox say he ride Brer Rabbit mos' up ter Miss Meadows's, en den he could git down en walk de balance er de way. Brer Rabbit 'greed, en den Brer Fox lipt out atter de saddle en de bridle. "Then Brer Rabbit say he was too sick, and Brer Fox say he wasn't, and there they had it up and down, disputing and contending. Brer Rabbit say he can't walk. Brer Fox say he tote him. Brer Rabbit say how? Brer Fox say in his arms. Brer Rabbit say he drop him. Brer Fox allow he won't. By and by Brer Rabbit say he go if Brer Fox tote him on his back. Brer Fox say he would. Brer Rabbit say he can't ride without a saddle. Brer Fox say he get the saddle. Brer Rabbit say he can't set in saddle less he have bridle for to hold by. Brer Fox say he get the bridle. Brer Rabbit say he can't ride without blind bridle, 'cause Brer Fox be shying at stumps along the road, and fling him off. Brer Fox say he get blind bridle. Then Brer Rabbit say he go. Then Brer Fox say he ride Brer Rabbit almost up to Miss Meadows's, and then he could get down and walk the balance of the way. Brer Rabbit agreed, and then Brer Fox leapt out after the saddle and the bridle.
"Co'se Brer Rabbit know de game dat Brer Fox wuz
fixin' fer ter play, en he 'termin' fer ter outdo 'im, en by de time he
koam his ha'r en twis' his mustarsh, en sorter rig up, yer come Brer Fox,
saddle en bridle on, en lookin' ez peart ez a circus pony. He trot up ter
de do' en stan' dar pawin' de ground en chompin' de bit same like sho
'nuff hoss, en Brer Rabbit he mount, he did, en dey amble off. Brer Fox
can't see behime wid de bline bridle
"Course Brer Rabbit know the game that Brer Fox was fixing for to play,
and he determine for to outdo him, and by the time he comb his hair and
twist his moustache, and sort of rig up, here come Brer Fox, saddle and
bridle on, and looking as pert as a circus pony. He trot up to the door
and stand there pawing the ground and chomping the bit same like sure
enough horse, and Brer Rabbit he mount, he did, and they amble off. Brer
Fox can't see behind with the blind bridle
har1880.2007.001.0046.jpg
on, but bimeby he feel Brer Rabbit raise one er his
foots.
on, but by and by he feel Brer Rabbit raise one of his foots.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' sezee. "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?' says he.
"'Short'nin' de lef stir'p, Brer Fox,' sezee. "'Shortening the left stirrup, Brer Fox,' says he.
"Bimeby Brer Rabbit raise up de udder foot. "By and by Brer Rabbit raise up the other foot.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' sezee. "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?' says he.
"'Pullin' down my pants, Brer Fox,' sezee. "'Pulling down my pants, Brer Fox,' says he.
"All de time, bless grashus, honey, Brer Rabbit wer puttin' on his spurrers, en w'en dey got close to Miss Meadows's, whar Brer Rabbit wuz to git off, en Brer Fox made a motion fer ter stan' still, Brer Rabbit slap de spurrers inter Brer Fox flanks, en you better b'leeve he got over groun'. W'en dey got ter de house, Miss Meadows en all de gals wuz settin' on de peazzer, en stidder stoppin' at de gate, Brer Rabbit rid on by, he did, en den come gallopin' down de road en up ter de hoss-rack, w'ich he hitch Brer Fox at, en den he santer inter de house, he did, en shake han's wid de gals, en set dar, smokin' his seegyar same ez a town man. Bimeby he draw in long puff, en den let hit out in a cloud, en squar hisse'f back en holler out, he did: "All the time, bless gracious, honey, Brer Rabbit were putting on his spurs, and when they got close to Miss Meadows's, where Brer Rabbit was to get off, and Brer Fox made a motion for to stand still, Brer Rabbit slap the spurs into Brer Fox flanks, and you better believe he got over ground. When they got to the house, Miss Meadows and all the gals was setting on the piazza, and instead of stopping at the gate, Brer Rabbit rode on by, he did, and then come galloping down the road and up to the horse-rack, which he hitch Brer Fox at, and then he saunter into the house, he did, and shake hands with the gals, and set there, smoking his cigar same as a town man. By and by he draw in long puff, and then let it out in a cloud, and square hisself back and holler out, he did:
"'Ladies, ain't I done tell you Brer Fox wuz de ridin'-hoss fer our fambly? He sorter losin' his gait' now, but I speck I kin fetch 'im all right in a mont' er so,' sezee. "'Ladies, ain't I done tell you Brer Fox was the riding-horse for our family? He sort of losing his gait now, but I expect I can fetch him all right in a moment or so,' says he.
"En den Brer Rabbit sorter grin, he did, en de gals giggle, en Miss Meadows, she praise up de pony, en dar wuz Brer Fox hitch fas' ter de rack, en couldn't he'p hisse'f." "And then Brer Rabbit sort of grin, he did, and the gals giggle, and Miss Meadows, she praise up the pony, and there was Brer Fox hitch fast to the rack, and couldn't help hisself."
"Is that all, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy as the old man paused.
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"Dat ain't all, honey, but 'twon't do fer ter give out too much cloff fer ter cut one pa'r pants," "That ain't all, honey, but it won't do for to give out too much cloth for to cut one pair pants," replied the old man sententiously.
VII.
MR. FOX IS AGAIN VICTIMIZED.
When "Miss Sally's" little boy went to Uncle Remus the next night to hear the conclusion of the adventure in which the Rabbit made a riding-horse of the Fox to the great enjoyment and gratification of Miss Meadows and the girls, he found the old man in a bad humor.
"I ain't tellin' no tales ter bad chilluns," "I ain't telling no tales to bad children," said Uncle Remus curtly.
"But, Uncle Remus, I ain't bad," said the little boy plaintively.
"Who dat chunkin' dem chickens dis mawnin'? Who dat knockin' out fokes's eyes wid dat Yallerbammer sling des 'fo' dinner? Who dat sickin' dat pinter puppy atter my pig? Who dat scatterin' my ingun sets? Who dat flingin' rocks on top er my house, w'ich a little mo' en one un em would er drap spang on my head?" "Who that chucking them chickens this morning? Who that knocking out folks's eyes with that Yallerhammer sling just before dinner? Who that siccing that pointer puppy after my pig? Who that scattering my onion sets? Who that flinging rocks on top of my house, which a little more than one of them would have dropped spang on my head?"
"Well, now, Uncle Remus, I didn't go to do it. I won't do so any more. Please, Uncle Remus, if you will tell me, I'll run to the house and bring you some tea-cakes."
"Seein' um's better'n hear'in' tell un um,"
"Seeing them's better than hearing tell of them,"
replied the
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old man, the severity of his countenance relaxing somewhat; but the
little boy darted out, and in a few minutes came running back with his pockets
full and his hands full.
"I lay yo' mammy'll 'spishun dat de rats' stummucks is widenin' in dis naberhood w'en she come fer ter count up 'er cakes," "I lay your mammy'll suspicion that the rats' stomachs is widening in this neighborhood when she come for to count up her cakes," said Uncle Remus, with a chuckle. "Deze," "These," he continued, dividing the cakes into two equal parts— "deze I'll tackle now, en deze I'll lay by fer Sunday. "these I'll tackle now, and these I'll lay by for Sunday.
"Lemme see. I mos' dis'member wharbouts Brer Fox en Brer Rabbit wuz." "Let me see. I almost disremember whereabouts Brer Fox and Brer Rabbit was."
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"The rabbit rode the fox to Miss Meadows's, and hitched him to the horse-rack," said the little boy.
"W'y co'se he did," "Why course he did," said Uncle Remus. "Co'se he did. Well, Brer Rabbit rid Brer Fox up, he did, en tied 'im to de rack, en den sot out in de peazzer wid de gals a smokin' er his seegyar wid mo' proudness dan wa't you mos' ever see. Dey talk, en dey sing, en dey play on de peanner, de gals did, twel bimeby hit come time fer Brer Rabbit fer to be gwine, en he tell um all good-by, en strut out to de hoss-rack same's ef he wuz de king er de patter-rollers, "Course he did. Well, Brer Rabbit rode Brer Fox up, he did, and tied him to the rack, and then sat out in the piazza with the gals a smoking on his cigar with more proudness than what you most ever see. They talk, and they sing, and they play on the piano, the gals did, til by and by it come time for Brer Rabbit for to be going, and he tell them all good-bye, and strut out to the horse-rack same as if he was the king of the patrollers, [note * ]
Patrols. In the country districts; order was kept on the plantations at night by the knowledge that they were liable to be visited at any moment by the patrols. Hence a song current among the negroes, the chorus of which was:
"Brer Fox ain't sayin' nuthin 'tall. He des rack off, he did, en keep his mouf shet, en Brer Rabbit know'd der wuz bizness cookin' up fer him, en he feel monstus skittish. Brer Fox amble on twel he git in de long lane, outer sight er Miss Meadows's house, en den he tu'n loose, he did. He rip en he r'ar, en he cuss, en he swar; he snort en he cavort." "Brer Fox ain't saying nothing at all. He just rack off, he did, and keep his mouth shut, and Brer Rabbit knowed there was business cooking up for him, and he feel monstrous skittish. Brer Fox amble on til he get in the long lane, out of sight of Miss Meadows's house, and then he turn loose, he did. He rip and he roar, and he cuss, and he swear; he snort and he cavort."
"What was he doing that for, Uncle Remus?" the little boy inquired.
"He wuz tryin' fer ter fling Brer Rabbit off'n his
back, bless yo' soul! But he des might ez well er rastle wid his own
shadder. Every time he hump hisse'f Brer Rabbit slap de spurrers in 'im,
en dar dey had it, up en down. Brer Fox fa'rly to' up de groun', he did,
en he jump so
"He was trying for to fling Brer Rabbit off of his back, bless your
soul! But he just might as well have wrestle with his own shadow. Every
time he hump hisself Brer Rabbit slap the spurs in him, and there they
had it, up and down. Brer Fox fairly tore up the ground, he did, and he
jump so
har1880.2007.001.0050.jpg
high en he jump so quick dat he mighty nigh snatch
his own tail off. Dey kep' on gwine on dis way twel bimeby Brer Fox lay
down en roll over, he did, en dis sorter onsettle Brer Rabbit, but by de
time Brer Fox got back on his footses agin, Brer Rabbit wuz gwine thoo de
under-bresh mo' samer dan a race-hoss. Brer Fox he lit out atter 'im, he
did, en he push Brer Rabbit so close dat it wuz 'bout all he could do fer
ter git in a holler tree. Hole too little fer Brer Fox fer ter git in, en
he hatter lay down en res' en gedder his mine tergedder.
high and he jump so quick that he mighty nigh snatch his own tail off.
They kept on going on this way til by and by Brer Fox lay down and roll
over, he did, and this sort of unsettle Brer Rabbit, but by the time Brer
Fox got back on his foots again, Brer Rabbit was going through the
under-brush more samer than a race-horse. Brer Fox he lit out after him,
he did, and he push Brer Rabbit so close that it was about all he could
do for to get in a hollow tree. Hole too little for Brer Fox for to get
in, and he had to lay down and rest and gather his mind together.
"While he wuz layin' dar, Mr. Buzzard come floppin' long, en seein' Brer Fox stretch out on de groun', he lit en view de premusses. Den Mr. Buzzard sorter shake his wing, en put his head on one side, en say to hisse'f like, sezee: "While he was laying there, Mr. Buzzard come flopping along, and seeing Brer Fox stretch out on the ground, he lit and view the premises. Then Mr. Buzzard sort of shake his wing, and put his head on one side, and say to hisself like, says he:
"'Brer Fox dead, en I so sorry,' sezee. "'Brer Fox dead, and I so sorry,' says he.
"'No I ain't dead, nudder,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. 'I got ole man Rabbit pent up in yer,' sezee, 'en I'm a gwineter git 'im dis time ef it take twel Chris'mus,' sezee. "'No I ain't dead, neither,' says Brer Fox, says he. 'I got old man Rabbit pent up in here,' says he, 'and I'm a going to get him this time if it take til Christmas,' says he.
"Den, atter some mo' palaver, Brer Fox make a bargain dat Mr. Buzzard wuz ter watch de hole, en keep Brer Rabbit dar wiles Brer Fox went atter his axe. Den Brer Fox, he lope off, he did, en Mr. Buzzard, he tuck up his stan' at de hole. Bimeby, w'en all git still, Brer Rabbit sorter scramble down close ter de hole, he did, en holler out: "Then, after some more palaver, Brer Fox make a bargain that Mr. Buzzard was to watch the hole, and keep Brer Rabbit there while Brer Fox went after his axe. Then Brer Fox, he lope off, he did, and Mr. Buzzard, he took up his stand at the hole. By and by, when all get still, Brer Rabbit sort of scramble down close to the hole, he did, and holler out:
"'Brer Fox! Oh! Brer Fox!'
"Brer Fox done gone, en nobody say nuthin'. Den Brer Rabbit squall out like he wuz mad; sezee: "Brer Fox done gone, and nobody say nothing. Then Brer Rabbit squall out like he was mad; says he:
har1880.2007.001.0051.jpg
"'You needn't talk less you wanter,' sezee; 'I knows youer dar, en I ain't keerin',' sezee. 'I des wanter tell you dat I wish mighty bad Brer Tukkey Buzzard wuz here,' sezee. "'You needn't talk unless you want to,' says he; 'I knows you're there, and I ain't caring,' says he. 'I just want to tell you that I wish mighty bad Brer Turkey Buzzard was here,' says he.
"Den Mr. Buzzard try ter talk like Brer Fox: "Then Mr. Buzzard try to talk like Brer Fox:
"'W'at you want wid Mr. Buzzard?' sezee. "'What you want with Mr. Buzzard?' says he.
"'Oh, nuthin' in 'tickler, 'cep' dere's de fattes' gray squir'l in yer dat ever I see,' sezee, 'en ef Brer Tukkey Buzzard wuz 'roun' he'd be mighty glad fer ter git 'im,' sezee. "'Oh, nothing in particular, except there's the fattest gray squirrel in here that ever I see,' says he, 'and if Brer Turkey Buzzard was around he'd be mighty glad for to get him,' says he.
"'How Mr. Buzzard gwine ter git 'im?' sez de Buzzard, sezee. "'How Mr. Buzzard going to get him?' says the Buzzard, says he.
"'Well, dars a little hole roun' on de udder side er de tree,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en ef Brer Tukkey Buzzard wuz here so he could take up his stan' dar,' sezee, 'I'd drive dat squir'l out,' sezee. "'Well, there's a little hole round on the other side of the tree,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and if Brer Turkey Buzzard was here so he could take up his stand there,' says he, 'I'd drive that squirrel out,' says he.
"'Drive 'im out, den,' sez Mr. Buzzard, sezee, 'en I'll see dat Brer Tukkey Buzzard gits 'im,' sezee. "'Drive him out, then,' says Mr. Buzzard, says he, 'and I'll see that Brer Turkey Buzzard gets him,' says he.
"Den Brer Rabbit kick up a racket, like he wer' drivin' sumpin' out, en Mr. Buzzard he rush 'roun' fer ter ketch de squir'l, en Brer Rabbit, he dash out, he did, en he des fly fer home." "Then Brer Rabbit kick up a racket, like he were driving something out, and Mr. Buzzard he rush around for to catch the squirrel, and Brer Rabbit, he dash out, he did, and he just fly for home."
At this point Uncle Remus took one of the tea-cakes, held his head back, opened his mouth, dropped the cake in with a sudden motion, looked at the little boy with an expression of astonishment, and then closed his eyes, and begun to chew, mumbling as an accompaniment the plaintive tune of "Don't you Grieve atter after Me."
The séance was over; but, before the little boy went
har1880.2007.001.0052.jpg
into the
"big house," Uncle Remus laid his rough hand tenderly on the child's shoulder, and
remarked, in a confidential tone:
"Honey, you mus' git up soon Chris'mus mawnin' en open de do'; kase I'm gwineter bounce in on Marse John en Miss Sally, en holler Chris'mus gif' des like I useter endurin' de fahmin' days fo' de war, w'en ole Miss wuz 'live. I boun' dey don't fergit de ole nigger, nudder. W'en you hear me callin' de pigs, honey, you des hop up en onfassen de do'. I lay I'll give Marse John wunner deze yer 'sprize parties." "Honey, you must get up soon Christmas morning and open the door; 'cause I'm going to bounce in on Master John and Miss Sally, and holler Christmas gift just like I used to enduring the famine days before the war, when old Miss was alive. I bound they don't forget the old nigger, neither. When you hear me calling the pigs, honey, you just hop up and unfasten the door. I lay I'll give Master John one of these here surprise parties."
VIII.
MR. FOX IS "OUTDONE" BY MR. BUZZARD.
"Ef I don't run inter no mistakes," "If I don't run into no mistakes," remarked Uncle Remus, as the little boy came tripping in to see him after supper, "Mr. Tukkey Buzzard wuz gyardin' de holler whar Brer Rabbit went in at, en w'ich he come out un." "Mr. Turkey Buzzard was guarding the hollow where Brer Rabbit went in at, and which he come out of."
The silence of the little boy verified the old man's recollection.
"Well, Mr. Buzzard, he feel mighty lonesome, he did, but he done prommust Brer Fox dat he'd stay, en he 'termin' fer ter sorter hang 'roun' en jine in de joke. En he ain't hatter wait long, nudder, kase bimeby yer come Brer Fox gallopin' thoo de woods wid his axe on his shoulder. "Well, Mr. Buzzard, he feel mighty lonesome, he did, but he done promised Brer Fox that he'd stay, and he determine for to sort of hang around and join in the joke. And he ain't had to wait long, neither, 'cause by and by here come Brer Fox galloping through the woods with his axe on his shoulder.
har1880.2007.001.0053.jpg
"'How you speck Brer Rabbit gittin' on, Brer Buzzard?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'How you expect Brer Rabbit getting on, Brer Buzzard?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Oh, he in dar,' sez Brer Buzzard, sezee. 'He mighty still, dough. I speck he takin' a nap,' sezee. "'Oh, he in there,' says Brer Buzzard, says he. 'He mighty still, though. I expect he taking a nap,' says he.
"'Den I'm des in time fer ter wake 'im up,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. En wid dat he fling off his coat, en spit in his han's, en grab de axe. Den he draw back en come down on de tree—pow! En eve'y time he come down wid de axe—pow!—Mr. Buzzard, he step high, he did, en holler out: "'Then I'm just in time for to wake him up,' says Brer Fox, says he. And with that he fling off his coat, and spit in his hands, and grab the axe. Then he draw back and come down on the tree—pow! And every time he come down with the axe—pow!—Mr. Buzzard, he step high, he did, and holler out:
"'Oh, he in dar, Brer Fox. He in dar, sho.' "'Oh, he in there, Brer Fox. He in there, sure.'
"En eve'y time a chip ud fly off, Mr. Buzzard, he'd jump, en dodge, en hole his head sideways, he would, en holler: "And every time a chip would fly off, Mr. Buzzard, he'd jump, and dodge, and hold his head sideways, he would, and holler:
"'He in dar, Brer Fox. I done heerd 'im. He in dar, sho.' "'He in there, Brer Fox. I done heard him. He in there, sure.'
"En Brer Fox, he lammed away at dat holler tree, he did, like a man maulin' rails, twel bimeby, atter he done got de tree mos' cut thoo, he stop fer ter ketch his bref, en he seed Mr. Buzzard laffin' behime his back, he did, en right den en dar, widout gwine enny fudder, Brer Fox, he smelt a rat. But Mr. Buzzard, he keep on holler'n: "And Brer Fox, he lammed away at that hollow tree, he did, like a man mauling rails, til by and by, after he done got the tree most cut through, he stop for to catch his breath, and he seed Mr. Buzzard laughing behind his back, he did, and right then and there, without going any further, Brer Fox, he smelt a rat. But Mr. Buzzard, he keep on hollering:
"'He in dar, Brer Fox. He in dar, sho. I done seed 'im.' "'He in there, Brer Fox. He in there, sure. I done seen him.'
"Den Brer Fox, he make like he peepin' up de holler, en he say, sezee: "Then Brer Fox, he make like he peeping up the holler, and he say, says he:
"'Run yer, Brer Buzzard, en look ef dis ain't Brer Rabbit's foot hanging down yer.' "'Run here, Brer Buzzard, and look if this ain't Brer Rabbit's foot hanging down here.'
"En Mr. Buzzard, he come steppin' up, he did, same
ez ef he wer treddin' on kurkle-burrs, en he stick his head
"And Mr. Buzzard, he come stepping up, he did, same as if he were
tredding on cockleburs, and he stick his head
har1880.2007.001.0054.jpg
in de hole; en no sooner did he done dat dan Brer
Fox grab 'im. Mr. Buzzard flap his wings, en scramble 'roun' right
smartually, he did, but 'twant no use. Brer Fox had de 'vantage er de
grip, he did, en he hilt 'im right down ter de groun'. Den Mr. Buzzard
squall out, sezee:
in the hole; and no sooner did he done that than Brer Fox grab him. Mr.
Buzzard flap his wings, and scramble around right smartly, he did, but it
wasn't no use. Brer Fox had the advantage of the grip, he did, and he
held him right down to the ground. Then Mr. Buzzard squall out, says
he:
"'Lemme 'lone, Brer Fox. Tu'n me loose,' sezee; 'Brer Rabbit'll git out. Youer gittin' close at 'im,' sezee, 'en leb'm mo' licks'll fetch 'im,' sezee. "'Let me alone, Brer Fox. Turn me loose,' says he; 'Brer Rabbit'll get out. You're getting close at him,' says he, 'and eleven more licks'll fetch him,' says he.
"'I'm nigher ter you, Brer Buzzard,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'dan I'll be ter Brer Rabbit dis day,' sezee. 'W'at you fool me fer?' sezee. "'I'm nigher to you, Brer Buzzard,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'than I'll be to Brer Rabbit this day,' says he. 'What you fool me for?' says he.
"'Lemme 'lone, Brer Fox,' sez Mr. Buzzard, sezee; 'my ole 'oman waitin' fer me. Brer Rabbit in dar,' sezee. "'Let me alone, Brer Fox,' says Mr. Buzzard, says he; 'my old woman waiting for me. Brer Rabbit in there,' says he.
"'Dar's a bunch er his fur on dat black-be'y bush,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'en dat ain't de way he come,' sezee. "'There's a bunch of his fur on that black-berry bush,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'and that ain't the way he come,' says he.
"Den Mr. Buzzard up'n tell Brer Fox how 'twuz, en he low'd, Mr. Buzzard did, dat Brer Rabbit wuz de low-downest w'atsizname w'at he ever run up wid. Den Brer Fox say, sezee: "Then Mr. Buzzard up and tell Brer Fox how it was, and he allowed, Mr. Buzzard did, that Brer Rabbit was the low-downest what's-his-name what he ever run up with. Then Brer Fox say, says he:
"'Dat's needer here ner dar, Brer Buzzard,' sezee. 'I lef' you yer fer ter watch dish yer hole, en I lef' Brer Rabbit in dar. I comes back en I fines you at de hole en Brer Rabbit ain't in dar,' sezee. 'I'm gwineter make you pay fer't. I done bin tampered wid twel plum' down ter de sap sucker'll set on a log en sassy me. I'm gwineter fling you in a bresh-heap en burn you up,' sezee. "'That's neither here nor there, Brer Buzzard,' says he. 'I left you here for to watch this here hole, and I left Brer Rabbit in there. I comes back and I finds you at the hole and Brer Rabbit ain't in there,' says he. 'I'm going to make you pay for it. I done been tampered with til plumb down to the sap sucker'll set on a log and sass me. I'm going to fling you in a brush-heap and burn you up,' says he.
"'Ef you fling me on der fier, Brer Fox, I'll fly 'way,' sez Mr. Buzzard, sezee. "'If you fling me on the fire, Brer Fox, I'll fly away,' says Mr. Buzzard, says he.
"'Well, den, I'll settle yo'
hash right now,' sez Brer
"'Well, then, I'll settle your hash right now,'
says Brer
har1880.2007.001.0055.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0056.jpg
[illustration - MISS COW FALLS A VICTIM TO BRER RABBIT S DECEIT. ]
har1880.2007.001.0057.jpg
Fox, sezee, en wid dat he grab Mr. Buzzard by de
tail, he did, en make fer ter dash 'im 'gin de groun', but des 'bout dat
time de tail fedders come out, en Mr. Buzzard sail off like wunner dese
yer berloons; en ez he riz, he holler back:
Fox, says he, and with that he grab Mr. Buzzard by the tail, he did,
and make for to dash him against the ground, but just about that time the
tail feathers come out, and Mr. Buzzard sail off like one of these here
balloons; and as he rise, he holler back:
"'You gimme good start, Brer Fox,' sezee, en Brer Fox sot dar en watch 'im fly outer sight." "'You give me good start, Brer Fox,' says he, and Brer Fox sat there and watch him fly out of sight."
"But what became of the Rabbit, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"Don't you pester 'longer Brer Rabbit, honey, en don't you fret 'bout 'im. You'll year whar he went en how he come out. Dish yer cole snap rastles wid my bones, now," "Don't you pester along with Brer Rabbit, honey, and don't you fret about him. You'll hear where he went and how he come out. This here cold snap wrestles with my bones, now," continued the old man, putting on his hat and picking up his walking-stick. "Hit rastles wid me monstus, en I gotter rack 'roun' en see if I kin run up agin some Chris'mus leavin's." "It wrestles with me monstrous, and I got to rack around and see if I can run up against some Christmas leavings."
IX.
MISS COW FALLS A VICTIM TO MR. RABBIT.
"Uncle Remus," said the little boy, "what became of the Rabbit after he fooled the Buzzard, and got out of the hollow tree?"
"Who? Brer Rabbit? Bless yo' soul, honey, Brer
Rabbit went skippin' 'long home, he did, des ez sassy ez a jay-bird at a
sparrer's nes'. He went gallopin' 'long, he did, but he feel mighty tired
out, en stiff in his jints, en he wuz mighty nigh dead for sumpin fer ter
drink, en bimeby,
"Who? Brer Rabbit? Bless your soul, honey, Brer Rabbit went skipping
along home, he did, just as sassy as a jay-bird at a sparrow's nest. He
went galloping along, he did, but he feel mighty tired out, and stiff in
his joints, and he was mighty nigh dead for something for to drink, and
by and by,
har1880.2007.001.0058.jpg
wen he got mos' home, he spied ole Miss Cow feedin'
roun' in a fiel', he did, en he 'termin' fer ter try his han' wid 'er.
Brer Rabbit know mighty well dat Miss Cow won't give 'im no milk, kaze
she done 'fuse 'im mo'n once, en w'en his ole 'oman wuz sick, at dat. But
never mind dat. Brer Rabbit sorter dance up 'long side er de fence, he
did, en holler out:
when he got almost home, he spied old Miss Cow feeding around in a
field, he did, and he determined for to try his hand with her. Brer
Rabbit know mighty well that Miss Cow won't give him no milk, 'cause she
done refuse him more than once, and when his old woman was sick, at that.
But never mind that. Brer Rabbit sort of dance up along side of the
fence, he did, and holler out:
"'Howdy, Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Howdy, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'W'y, howdy, Brer Rabbit,' sez Miss Cow, sez she. "'Why, howdy, Brer Rabbit,' says Miss Cow, says she.
"'How you fine yo'se'f deze days, Sis Cow?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'How you find yourself these days, Sis Cow?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'I'm sorter toler'ble, Brer Rabbit; how you come on?' sez Miss Cow, sez she. "'I'm sort of tolerable, Brer Rabbit; how you come on?' says Miss Cow, says she.
"'Oh, I'm des toler'ble myse'f, Sis Cow; sorter linger'n' twix' a bauk en a break-down,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Oh, I'm just tolerable myself, Sis Cow; sort of lingering twixt a bank and a break-down,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'How yo' fokes, Brer Rabbit?' sez Miss Cow, sez she. "'How your folks, Brer Rabbit?' says Miss Cow, says she.
"'Dey er des middlin', Sis Cow; how Brer Bull gittin' on?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'They are just middling, Sis Cow; how Brer Bull getting on?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Sorter so-so,' sez Miss Cow, sez she. "'sort of so-so,' says Miss Cow, says she.
"'Dey er some mighty nice 'simmons up dis tree, Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en I'd like mighty well fer ter have some un um,' sezee. "'They are some mighty nice persimmons up this tree, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and I'd like mighty well for to have some of them,' says he.
"'How you gwineter git um, Brer Rabbit?' sez she. "'How you going to get them, Brer Rabbit?' says she.
"'I 'low'd maybe dat I might ax you fer ter butt 'gin de tree, en shake some down, Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'I allowed maybe that I might ask you for to butt against the tree, and shake some down, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"C'ose Miss Cow don't wanter diskommerdate Brer
Rabbit, en she march up ter de 'simmon tree, she did, en
"Course Miss Cow don't want to discommodate Brer Rabbit, and she march
up to the persimmon tree, she did, and
har1880.2007.001.0059.jpg
hit it a rap wid'er hawns—blam! Now, den,"
hit it a rap with her horns—blam! Now, then,"
continued Uncle Remus, tearing off the corner of a plug of tobacco and
cramming it into his mouth—
"now, den, dem 'simmons wuz green ez grass, en
na'er one never drap. Den Miss Cow butt de tree—blim! Na'er 'simmon drap.
Den Miss Cow sorter back off little, en run agin de tree—blip! No
'simmons never drap. Den Miss Cow back off little fudder, she did, en
hi'st her tail on 'er back, en come agin de tree, kerblam! en she come so
fas', en she come so hard, twel wunner her hawns went spang thoo de tree,
en dar she wuz. She can't go forreds, en she can't go backerds. Dis
zackly w'at Brer Rabbit waitin' fer, en he no sooner seed ole Miss Cow
all fas'en'd up dan he jump up, he did, en cut de pidjin-wing.
"now, then, them persimmons was green as grass, and nary a one never
drop. Then Miss Cow butt the tree—blim! Nary a persimmon drop. Then Miss
Cow sort of back off little, and run against the tree—blip! No persimmons
never drop. Then Miss Cow back off little further, she did, and hoist her
tail on her back, and come against the tree, kerblam! and she come so
fast, and she come so hard, til one of her horns went spang through the
tree, and there she was. She can't go forwards, and she can't go
backwards. This exactly what Brer Rabbit waiting for, and he no sooner
seed old Miss Cow all fastened up than he jump up, he did, and cut the
pigeon-wing.
"'Come he'p me out, Brer Rabbit,' sez Miss Cow, sez she. "'Come help me out, Brer Rabbit,' says Miss Cow, says she.
"'I can't clime, Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'but I'll run'n tell Brer Bull,' sezee; en wid dat Brer Rabbit put out fer home, en 'twan't long 'fo here he come wid his ole 'oman en all his chilluns, en de las' wunner de fambly wuz totin' a pail. De big uns had big pails, en de little uns had little pails. En dey all s'roundid ole Miss Cow, dey did, en you hear me, honey, dey milk't 'er dry. De ole uns milk't en de young uns milk't, en den w'en dey done got nuff, Brer Rabbit, he up'n say, sezee: "'I can't climb, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'but I'll run and tell Brer Bull,' says he; and with that Brer Rabbit put out for home, and it wasn't long before here he come with his old woman and all his children, and the last one of the family was toting a pail. The big ones had big pails, and the little ones had little pails. And they all surounded old Miss Cow, they did, and you hear me, honey, they milked her dry. The old ones milked and the young ones milked, and then when they done got enough, Brer Rabbit, he up and say, says he:
"'I wish you mighty well, Sis Cow. I 'low'd bein's how dat you'd hatter sorter camp out all night dat I'd better come en swaje yo' bag,' sezee." "'I wish you mighty well, Sis Cow. I allowed being as how that you'd had to sort of camp out all night that I'd better come and assuage your bag,' says he."
"Do which, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
har1880.2007.001.0060.jpg
"Go 'long, honey! Swaje 'er bag. W'en cows don't git milk't, der bag swells, en youk'n hear um a moanin' en a beller'n des like dey wuz gittin' hurtid. Dat's w'at Brer Rabbit done. He 'sembled his fambly, he did, en he swaje ole Miss Cow's bag. "Go along, honey! Swage her bag. When cows don't get milked, their bag swells, and you can hear them a'moaning and a'bellowing just like they was getting hurted. That's what Brer Rabbit done. He assembled his family, he did, and he swage old Miss Cow's bag.
"Miss Cow, she stood dar, she did, en she study en study, en strive fer ter break loose, but de hawn done bin jam in de tree so tight dat twuz way 'fo day in de mornin' 'fo' she loose it. Ennyhow hit wuz endurin' er de night, en atter she git loose she sorter graze 'roun', she did, fer ter jestify 'er stummuck. She 'low'd, ole Miss Cow did, dat Brer Rabbit be hoppin' 'long dat way fer ter see how she gittin' on, en she tuck'n lay er trap fer 'im; en des 'bout sunrise wat'd ole Miss Cow do but march up ter de 'simmon tree en stick er hawn back in de hole? But, bless yo' soul, honey, w'ile she wuz croppin' de grass, she tuck one moufull too menny, kaze w'en she hitch on ter de 'simmon tree agin, Brer Rabbit wuz settin' in de fence cornder a watchin' un 'er. Den Brer Rabbit he say ter hisse'f: "Miss Cow, she stood there, she did, and she study and study, and strive for to break loose, but the horn done been jam in the tree so tight that it was way before day in the morning before she loose it. Anyhow it was enduring of the night, and after she get loose she sort of graze around, she did, for to justify her stomach. She allowed, old Miss Cow did, that Brer Rabbit be hopping along that way for to see how she getting on, and she took and lay her trap for him; and just about sunrise what did old Miss Cow do but march up to the persimmon tree and stick her horn back in the hole? But, bless your soul, honey, while she was cropping the grass, she took one mouthful too many, 'cause when she hitch on to the persimmon tree again, Brer Rabbit was setting in the fence corner a'watching of her. Then Brer Rabbit he say to hisself:
"'Heyo,' sezee, 'w'at dis yer gwine on now? Hole yo' hosses, Sis Cow, twel you hear me comin',' sezee. "'Heyo,' says he, 'what this here going on now? Hold your horses, Sis Cow, til you hear me coming,' says he.
"En den he crope off down de fence, Brer Rabbit did, en bimeby here he come—lippity-clippity, clippity-lippity—des a sailin' down de big road. "And then he crept off down the fence, Brer Rabbit did, and by and by here he come—lippity-clippity, clippity-lippity—just a sailing down the big road.
"'Mawnin', Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'how you come on dis mawnin'?' sezee. "'Morning, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'how you come on this morning?' says he.
"'Po'ly, Brer Rabbit, po'ly,'
sez Miss Cow, sez she. 'I ain't had no res' all
night,' sez she. 'I can't pull loose,' sez she,
'but ef you'll come en ketch holt er my tail, Brer
"'Poorly, Brer Rabbit, poorly,' says Miss Cow,
says she. 'I ain't had no rest all night,' says
she. 'I can't pull loose,' says she, 'but if you'll come and catch hold of my tail, Brer
har1880.2007.001.0061.jpg
Rabbit,' sez she, 'I reckin may be I kin fetch my hawn out,' sez she.
Den Brer Rabbit, he come up little closer, but he ain't gittin' too
close.
Rabbit,' says she, 'I reckon
maybe I can fetch my horn out,' says she. Then Brer Rabbit, he
come up little closer, but he ain't getting too close.
"'I speck I'm nigh nuff, Sis Cow,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'I'm a mighty puny man, en I might git trompled,' sezee. 'You do de pullin', Sis Cow,' sezee, 'en I'll do de gruntin',' sezee. "'I speck expect I'm nigh enough, Sis Cow,' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'I'm a mighty puny man, and I might get trampled,' says he. 'You do the pulling, Sis Cow,' says he, 'and I'll do the grunting,' says he.
Den Miss Cow, she pull out 'er hawn, she did, en tuck atter Brer Rabbit, en down de big road dey had it, Brer Rabbit wid his years laid back, en Miss Cow wid 'er head down en 'er tail curl. Brer Rabbit kep' on gainin', en bimeby he dart in a brier-patch, en by de time Miss Cow come 'long he had his head stickin' out, en his eyes look big ez Miss Sally's chany sassers. Then Miss Cow, she pull out her horn, she did, and took after Brer Rabbit, and down the big road they had it, Brer Rabbit with his ears laid back, and Miss Cow with her head down and her tail curl. Brer Rabbit kept on gaining, and by and by he dart in a briar-patch, and by the time Miss Cow come along he had his head sticking out, and his eyes look big as Miss Sally's china saucers.
"'Heyo, Sis Cow! Whar you gwine?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Heyo, Sis Cow! Where you going?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Howdy, Brer Big-Eyes,' sez Miss Cow, sez she. 'Is you seed Brer Rabbit go by?' "'Howdy, Brer Big-Eyes,' says Miss Cow, says she. 'Is you seen Brer Rabbit go by?'
"'He des dis minit pass,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en he look mighty sick,' sezee. "'He just this minute pass,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and he look mighty sick,' says he.
"En wid dat, Miss Cow tuck down de road like de dogs wuz atter 'er, en Brer Rabbit, he des lay down dar in de brier-patch en roll en laff twel his sides hurtid 'im. He bleedzd ter laff. Fox atter 'im, Buzzard atter 'im, en Cow atter 'im, en dey ain't kotch 'im yit." "And with that, Miss Cow took down the road like the dogs was after her, and Brer Rabbit, he just lay down there in the briar-patch and roll and laugh til his sides hurted him. He pleased to laugh. Fox after him, Buzzard after him, and Cow after him, and they ain't catch him yet."
har1880.2007.001.0062.jpg
X.
MR. TERRAPIN APPEARS UPON THE SCENE.
Miss Sally's little boy again occupying the anxious position of auditor, Uncle Remus took the shovel and "put de noses er de chunks tergedder," "put the noses of the chunks together," as he expressed it, and then began:
"One day, atter Sis Cow done run pas' 'er own shadder tryin' fer ter ketch 'im, Brer Rabbit tuck'n 'low dat he wuz gwineter drap in en see Miss Meadows en de gals, en he got out his piece er lookin'-glass en primp up, he did, en sot out. Gwine canterin' 'long de road, who should Brer Rabbit run up wid but ole Brer Tarrypin—de same ole one-en-sixpunce. Brer Rabbit stop, he did, en rap on de roof er Brer Tarrypin house." "One day, after Sis Cow done run past her own shadow trying for to catch him, Brer Rabbit took and allow that he was going to drop in and see Miss Meadows and the gals, and he got out his piece of looking-glass and primp up, he did, and set out. Going cantering along the road, who should Brer Rabbit run up with but old Brer Terrapin—the same old one-and-sixpence. Brer Rabbit stop, he did, and rap on the roof of Brer Terrapin house."
"On the roof of his house, Uncle Remus?" interrupted the little boy.
"Co'se honey, Brer Tarrypin kare his house wid 'im.
Rain er shine, hot er cole, strike up wid ole Brer Tarrypin w'en you will
en w'ilst you may, en whar you fine 'im, dar you'll fine his shanty.
Hit's des like I tell you. So den! Brer Rabbit he rap on de roof er Brer
Tarrypin's house, he did, en ax wuz he in, en Brer Tarrypin 'low dat he
wuz, en den Brer Rabbit, he ax 'im howdy, en den Brer Tarrypin he
likewise 'spon' howdy, en den Brer Rabbit he say whar wuz Brer Tarrypin
gwine, en Brer Tarrypin, he say w'ich he wern't gwine nowhar skasely. Den
Brer Rabbit 'low he wuz on his way fer ter see Miss Meadows en de gals,
en he
"Course honey, Brer Terrapin carry his house with him. Rain or shine,
hot or cold, strike up with old Brer Terrapin when you will and whilst
you may, and where you find him, there you'll find his shanty. It's just
like I tell you. So then! Brer Rabbit he rap on the roof of Brer
Terrapin's house, he did, and ask was he in, and Brer
Terrapin allow that he was, and then Brer Rabbit, he ask him
howdy, and then Brer Terrapin he likewise respond
howdy, and then Brer Rabbit he say where was Brer Terrapin going, and
Brer Terrapin, he say which he weren't going nowhere scarsely. Then Brer
Rabbit allow he was on his way for to see Miss Meadows and the gals, and
he
har1880.2007.001.0063.jpg
ax Brer Tarrypin ef he won't jine in en go long, en
Brer Tarrypin 'spon' he don't keer ef he do, en den dey sot out. Dey had
plenty er time fer confabbin' 'long de way, but bimeby dey got dar, en
Miss Meadows en de gals dey come ter de do', dey did, en ax um in, en in
dey went.
ask Brer Terrapin if he won't join in and go along, and Brer Terrapin
respond he don't care if he do, and then they set out. They
had plenty of time for confabbing along the way, but by and by they got
there, and Miss Meadows and the gals they come to the door, they did, and
ask them in, and in they went.
"W'en dey got in, Brer Tarrypin wuz so flat-footed dat he wuz too low on de flo', en he wern't high nuff in a cheer, but while they wuz all scramblin' 'roun' tryin' fer ter git "When they got in, Brer Terrapin was so flat-footed that he was too low on the floor, and he weren't high enough in a chair, but while they was all scrambling around trying for to get Brer Tarrypin a cheer, Brer Rabbit, he pick 'im up en put 'im on de shelf whar de water-bucket sot, en ole Brer Tarrypin, he lay back up dar, he did, des es proud ez a nigger widder cook 'possum. Brer Terrapin a chair, Brer Rabbit, he pick him up and put him on the shelf where the water-bucket sat, and old Brer Terrapin he lay back up there, he did, just as proud as a nigger with a cook opossum.
har1880.2007.001.0064.jpg
"Co'se de talk fell on Brer Fox, en Miss Meadows en de gals make a great 'miration 'bout w'at a gaily ridin'-hoss Brer Fox wuz, en dey make lots er fun, en laff en giggle same like gals duz deze days. Brer Rabbit, he sot dar in de cheer smokin' his seegyar, en he sorter kler up his th'oat, en say, sezee: "Course the talk fell on Brer Fox, and Miss Meadows and the gals make a great admiration about what a gaily riding-horse Brer Fox was, and they make lots of fun, and laugh and giggle same like gals does these days. Brer Rabbit, he sat there in the chair smoking his cigar, and he sort of clear up his throat, and say, says he:
"'I'd er rid 'im over dis mawnin', ladies,' sezee, 'but I rid 'im so hard yistiddy dat he went lame in de off fo' leg, en I speck I'll hatter swop 'im off yit,' sezee. "'I'd have rode him over this morning, ladies,' says he, 'but I rode him so hard yesterday that he went lame in the off fore leg, and I expect I'll have to swop him off yet,' says he.
"Den Brer Tarrypin, he up'n say, sezee: "Then Brer Terrapin, he up and say, says he:
"'Well, ef you gwineter sell 'im Brer Rabbit,' sezee, 'sell him some'rs outen dis naberhood, kase he done bin yer too long now,' sezee. 'No longer'n day 'fo' yistiddy,' sezee, 'Brer Fox pass me on de road, en whatter you reckin he say?' sezee: "'Well, if you going to sell him Brer Rabbit,' says he, 'sell him somewheres out of this neighborhood, 'cause he done been here too long now,' says he. 'No longer than day before yesterday,' says he, 'Brer Fox pass me on the road, and what do you reckon he say?' says he:
"'Law, Brer Tarrypin,' sez Miss Meadows, sez she, 'you don't mean ter say he cust?' sez she, en den de gals hilt der fans up 'fo' der faces. "'Lord, Brer Terrapin,' says Miss Meadows, says she, 'you don't mean to say he curst?' says she, and then the gals held their fans up before their faces.
"'Oh, no, ma'm,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee, 'he didn't cust, but he holler out—"Heyo Stinkin' Jim!"' sezee. "'Oh, no, ma'm,' says Brer Terrapin, says he, 'he didn't curse, but he holler out—"Heyo Stinking Jim!"' says he.
"'Oh, my! You hear dat, gals?' sez Miss Meadows, sez she; 'Brer Fox call Brer Tarrypin Stinkin' Jim,' sez she, en den Miss Meadows en de gals make great wonderment how Brer Fox kin talk dat a way 'bout nice man like Brer Tarrypin. "'Oh, my! You hear that, gals?' says Miss Meadows, says she; 'Brer Fox call Brer Terrapin Stinking Jim,' says she, and then Miss Meadows and the gals make great wonderment how Brer Fox can talk that a way about nice man like Brer Terrapin.
"But bless grashus, honey! w'ilst all dis gwine on,
Brer Fox wuz stannin' at de back do' wid one year at de cat-hole
lissenin'. Eave-drappers don't hear no good er
"But bless gracious, honey! whilst all this going on, Brer Fox was
standing at the back door with one ear at the cat-hole listening.
Eavesdroppers don't hear no good of
har1880.2007.001.0065.jpg
deyse'f, en de way Brer Fox wuz 'bused dat day wuz
a caution.
theyself, and the way Brer Fox was abused that day was a caution.
"Bimeby Brer Fox stick his head in de do', en holler out: "By and by Brer Fox stick his head in the door, and holler out:
"'Good evenin', fokes, I wish you mighty well,' sezee, en wid dat he make a dash fer Brer Rabbit, but Miss Meadows en de gals dey holler en squall, dey did, en Brer Tarrypin he got ter scramblin' roun' up dar on de shelf, en off he come, en blip he tuck Brer Fox on de back er de head. Dis sorter stunted Brer Fox, en w'en he gedder his 'membunce de mos' he seed wuz a pot er greens turnt over in de fireplace, en a broke cheer. Brer Rabbit wuz gone, en Brer Tarrypin wuz gone, en Miss Meadows en de gals wuz gone." "'Good evening, folks, I wish you mighty well,' says he, and with that he make a dash for Brer Rabbit, but Miss Meadows and the gals they holler and squall, they did, and Brer Tarrypin he got to scrambling around up there on the shelf, and off he come, and blip he took Brer Fox on the back of the head. This sort of stunted Brer Fox, and when he get to his remembrance the most he seed was a pot of greens turned over in the fireplace, and a broke chair. Brer Rabbit was gone, and Brer Terrapin was gone, and Miss Meadows and the gals was gone."
"Where did the Rabbit go, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked, after a pause.
"Bless yo' soul, honey! Brer Rabbit he skint up de chimbly—dats w'at turnt de pot er greens over. Brer Tarrypin, he crope under de bed, he did, en got behime de cloze-chist, en Miss Meadows en de gals, dey run out in de yard. "Bless your soul, honey! Brer Rabbit he skinned up the chimney—that's what turned the pot of greens over. Brer Terrapin, he crept under the bed, he did, and got behind the clothes-chest, and Miss Meadows and the gals, they run out in the yard.
"Brer Fox, he sorter look roun' en feel er de back er his head, whar Brer Tarrypin lit, but he don't see no sine er Brer Rabbit. But de smoke en de ashes gwine up de chimbly got de best er Brer Rabbit, en bimeby he sneeze—huckychow! "Brer Fox, he sort of look around and feel of the back of his head, where Brer Terrapin lit, but he don't see no sign of Brer Rabbit. But the smoke and the ashes going up the chimney got the best of Brer Rabbit, and by and by he sneeze—huckychow!
"'Aha!' sez Brer Fox, sezee: 'youer dar, is you?' sezee. 'Well, I'm gwineter smoke you out, ef it takes a mont'. Youer mine dis time,' sezee. Brer Rabbit ain't sayin' nuthin'. "'Aha!' says Brer Fox, says he: 'you're there, is you?' says he. 'Well, I'm going to smoke you out, if it takes a month. You're mine this time,' says he. Brer Rabbit ain't saying nothing.
har1880.2007.001.0066.jpg
"'Ain't you comin' down?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. Brer Rabbit ain't sayin' nuthin'. Den Brer Fox, he went out atter some wood, he did, en w'en he come back he hear Brer Rabbit laffin'. "'Ain't you coming down?' says Brer Fox, says he. Brer Rabbit ain't saying nothing. Then Brer Fox, he went out after some wood, he did, and when he come back he hear Brer Rabbit laughing.
"'W'at you laffin' at, Brer Rabbit?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'What you laughing at, Brer Rabbit?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Can't tell you, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Can't tell you, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Better tell, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Better tell, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"''Taint nuthin but a box er money somebody done gone en lef' up yer in de chink er de chimbly,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'It ain't nothing but a box of money somebody done gone and left up here in the chink of the chimney,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Don't b'leeve you,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Don't believe you,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Look up en see,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, en w'en Brer Fox look up, Brer Rabbit spit his eyes full er terbarker joose, he did, en Brer Fox, he make a break fer de branch, en Brer Rabbit he come down en tole de ladies good-by. "'Look up and see,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, and when Brer Fox look up, Brer Rabbit spit his eyes full of tobacco juice, he did, and Brer Fox, he make a break for the branch, and Brer Rabbit he come down and told the ladies good-bye.
"'How you git 'im off, Brer Rabbit?' sez Miss Meadows, sez she. "'How you get him off, Brer Rabbit?' says Miss Meadows, says she.
"'Who? me?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee; 'w'y I des tuck en tole 'im dat ef he didn't go 'long home en stop playin' his pranks on spectubble fokes, dat I'd take 'im out and th'ash 'im,' sezee." "'Who? me?' says Brer Rabbit, says he; 'why I just took and told him that if he didn't go along home and stop playing his pranks on respectable folks, that I'd take him out and thrash him,' says he."
"And what became of the Terrapin?" asked the little boy.
"Oh, well den!" "Oh, well then!" exclaimed the old man, "chilluns can't speck ter know all 'bout eve'ything 'fo' dey git some res'. Dem eyeleds er yone wanter be propped wid straws dis minnit." "children can't expect to know all about everything before they get some rest. Them eyelids of yours want to be propped with straws this minute."
har1880.2007.001.0067.jpg
XI.
MR. WOLF MAKES A FAILURE.
"I LAY yo' ma got comp'ny," "I LAY your ma got company," said Uncle Remus, as the little boy entered the old man's door with a huge piece of mince-pie in his hand, "en ef she aint got comp'ny, den she done gone en drap de cubberd key som'ers whar you done run up wid it." "and if she ain't got company, then she done gone and drop the cupboard key somewheres where you done run up with it."
"Well, I saw the pie lying there, Uncle Remus, and I just thought I'd fetch it out to you."
"Tooby sho, honey," "To be sure, honey," replied the old man, regarding the child with admiration. "Tooby sho, honey; dat changes marters. Chrismus doin's is outer date, en dey aint got no bizness layin' roun' loose. Dish yer pie," "To be sure, honey; that changes matters. Christmas doings is out of date, and they ain't got no business laying around loose. This here pie," Uncle Remus continued, holding it up and measuring it with an experienced eye, "will gimme strenk fer ter persoo on atter Brer Fox en Brer Rabbit en de udder beastesses w'at dey roped in 'long wid um." "will give me strength for to pursue on after Brer Fox and Brer Rabbit and the other beasts what they roped in along with them."
Here the old man paused, and proceeded to demolish the pie—a feat accomplished in a very short time. Then he wiped the crumbs from his beard and began:
"Brer Fox feel so bad, en he git so mad 'bout Brer
Rabbit, dat he dunno w'at ter do, en he look mighty down-hearted. Bimeby,
one day wiles he wuz gwine 'long de road, ole Brer Wolf come up wid 'im.
W'en dey done howdyin' en axin' atter one nudder's fambly kunnexshun,
Brer Wolf, he 'low, he did, dat der wuz sump'n wrong wid Brer Fox, en
Brer Fox, he 'low'd der wern't, en he went
"Brer Fox feel so bad, and he get so mad about Brer Rabbit, that he
don't know what to do, and he look mighty down-hearted. By and by, one
day while he was going along the road, old Brer Wolf come up with him.
When they done howdying and asking after one another's family connection,
Brer Wolf, he allow, he did, that there was something wrong with Brer
Fox, and Brer Fox, he allowed there weren't, and he went
har1880.2007.001.0068.jpg
on en laff en make great ter-do kaze Brer Wolf look
like he spishun sump'n. But Brer Wolf, he got mighty long head, en he
sorter broach 'bout Brer Rabbit's kyar'ns on, kaze de way dat Brer Rabbit
'ceive Brer Fox done got ter be de talk er de naberhood. Den Brer Fox en
Brer Wolf dey sorter palavered on, dey did, twel bimeby Brer Wolf he up'n
say dat he done got plan fix fer ter trap Brer Rabbit. Den Brer Fox say
how. Den Brer Wolf up'n tell 'im dat de way fer ter git de drap on Brer
Rabbit wuz ter git 'im in Brer Fox house. Brer Fox dun know Brer Rabbit
uv ole, en he know dat sorter game done wo' ter a frazzle, but Brer Wolf,
he talk mighty 'swadin'.
on and laugh and make great to-do 'cause Brer Wolf look like he
suspicion something. But Brer Wolf, he got mighty long head, and he sort
of broach about Brer Rabbit's carryings on, 'cause the way that Brer
Rabbit deceive Brer Fox done got to be the talk of the neighborhood. Then
Brer Fox and Brer Wolf they sort of palavered on, they did, til by and by
Brer Wolf he up and say that he done got plan fix for to trap Brer
Rabbit. Then Brer Fox say how. Then Brer Wolf up and tell him that the
way for to get the drop on Brer Rabbit was to get him in Brer Fox house.
Brer Fox done know Brer Rabbit of old, and he know that sort of game done
wore to a frazzle, but Brer Wolf, he talk mighty persuading.
"'How you gwine git 'im dar?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'How you going get him there?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Fool 'im dar,' sez Brer Wolf, sezee. "'Fool him there,' says Brer Wolf, says he.
"'Who gwine do de foolin'?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Who going do the fooling?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'I'll do de foolin',' sez Brer Wolf, sezee, 'ef you'll do de gamin',' sezee. "'I'll do the fooling,' says Brer Wolf, says he, 'if you'll do the gaming,' says he.
"'How you gwine do it?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'How you going do it?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'You run 'long home, en git on de bed, en make like you dead, en don't you say nuthin' twel Brer Rabbit come en put his han's onter you,' sez Brer Wolf, sezee, 'en ef we don't git 'im fer supper, Joe's dead en Sal's a widder,' sezee. "'You run along home, and get on the bed, and make like you dead, and don't you say nothing til Brer Rabbit come and put his hands onto you,' says Brer Wolf, says he, 'and if we don't get him for supper, Joe's dead and Sal's a widow,' says he.
"Dis look like mighty nice game, en Brer Fox 'greed. So den he amble off home, en Brer Wolf, he march off ter Brer Rabbit house. W'en he got dar, hit look like nobody at home, but Brer Wolf he walk up en knock on de do'—blam! blam! Nobody come. Den he lam aloose en knock 'gin—blim! blim! "This look like mighty nice game, and Brer Fox agreed. So then he amble off home, and Brer Wolf, he march off to Brer Rabbit house. When he got there, it look like nobody at home, but Brer Wolf he walk up and knock on the door—blam! blam! Nobody come. Then he lam aloose and knock again—blim! blim!
har1880.2007.001.0069.jpg
"'Who dar?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Who there?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Fr'en',' sez Brer Wolf. "'Friend,' says Brer Wolf.
"'Too menny fr'en's spiles de dinner,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee; 'w'ich un's dis?' sezee. "'Too many friends spoils the dinner,' says Brer Rabbit, says he; 'which one's this?' says he.
"'I fetch bad news, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Wolf, sezee. "'I fetch bad news, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Wolf, says he.
"'Bad news is soon tole,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Bad news is soon told,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"By dis time Brer Rabbit done come ter de do', wid his head tied up in a red hankcher. "By this time Brer Rabbit done come to the door, with his head tied up in a red handkerchief.
"'Brer Fox died dis mawnin',' sez Brer Wolf, sezee. "'Brer Fox died this morning,' says Brer Wolf, says he.
"'Whar yo' mo'nin' gown, Brer Wolf?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Where your mourning gown, Brer Wolf?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Gwine atter it now,' sez Brer Wolf, sezee. 'I des call by fer ter bring de news. I went down ter Brer Fox house little bit 'go, en dar I foun' 'im stiff,' sezee. "'Going after it now,' says Brer Wolf, says he. 'I just call by for to bring the news. I went down to Brer Fox house little bit ago, and there I found him stiff,' says he.
"Den Brer Wolf lope off. Brer Rabbit sot down en scratch his head, he did, en bimeby he say ter hisse'f dat he b'leeve he sorter drap 'roun' by Brer Fox house fer ter see how de lan' lay. No sooner said'n done. Up he jump, en out he went. W'en Brer Rabbit got close ter Brer Fox house, all look lonesome. Den he went up nigher. Nobody stirrin'. Den he look in, en dar lay Brer Fox stretch out on de bed des ez big ez life. Den Brer Rabbit make like he talkin' to hisse'f. "Then Brer Wolf lope off. Brer Rabbit sat down and scratch his head, he did, and by and by he say to hisself that he believe he sort of drop around by Brer Fox house for to see how the land lay. No sooner said than done. Up he jump, and out he went. When Brer Rabbit got close to Brer Fox house, all look lonesome. Then he went up nigher. Nobody stirring. Then he look in, and there lay Brer Fox stretch out on the bed just as big as life. Then Brer Rabbit make like he talking to hisself.
"'Nobody 'roun' fer ter look
atter Brer Fox—not even Brer Tukkey Buzzard ain't come ter de
funer'l,' sezee. 'I hope Brer Fox ain't
dead, but I speck he is,' sezee. 'Even down
ter Brer Wolf done gone en lef' 'im. Hit's de busy season wid me, but
I'll set up wid 'im. He seem like he dead, yit he mayn't be,' sez
Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'W'en a
"'Nobody around for to look after Brer Fox—not
even Brer Turkey Buzzard ain't come to the funeral,' says he. 'I hope Brer Fox ain't dead, but I suspect he
is,' says he. 'Even down to Brer Wolf done gone
and left him. It's the busy season with me; but I'll set up with him.
He seem like he dead, yet he may not be,' says Brer Rabbit, says
he. 'When a
har1880.2007.001.0070.jpg
man go ter see dead fokes,
dead fokes allers raises up der behime leg en hollers, wahoo!' sezee.
man go to see dead folks, dead folks always
raises up their behind leg and hollers, wahoo!' says he.
"Brer Fox he stay still. Den Brer Rabbit he talk little louder: "Brer Fox he stay still. Then Brer Rabbit he talk little louder:
"'Mighty funny. Brer Fox look like he dead, yit he don't do like he dead. Dead fokes hists der behime leg en hollers wahoo! w'en a man come ter see um,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Mighty funny. Brer Fox look like he dead, yet he don't do like he dead. Dead folks hoists their behind leg and hollers wahoo! when a man come to see them,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"Sho' nuff, Brer Fox lif' up his foot en holler wahoo! en Brer Rabbit he tear out de house like de dogs wuz atter 'im.' Brer Wolf mighty smart, but nex' time you hear fum 'im, honey, he'll be in trouble. You des hole yo' breff'n wait." "Sure enough, Brer Fox lift up his foot and holler wahoo! and Brer Rabbit he tear out the house like the dogs was after him. Brer Wolf mighty smart, but next time you hear from him, honey, he'll be in trouble. You just hold your breath and wait."
XII.
MR. FOX TACKLES OLD MAN TARRYPIN.
"One day," said Uncle Remus, sharpening his knife on the palm of his hand— "one day Brer Fox strike up wid Brer Tarrypin right in the middle er de big road. Brer Tarrypin done heerd 'im comin', en he 'low ter hissef dat he'd sorter keep one eye open; but Brer Fox wuz monstus perlite, en he open up de confab, he did, like he ain't see Brer Tarrypin sence de las' freshit. "one day Brer Fox strike up with Brer Terrapin right in the middle of the big road. Brer Terrapin done heard him coming, and he allow to hisself that he'd sort of keep one eye open; but Brer Fox was monstrous polite, and he open up the confab, he did, like he ain't see Brer Terrapin since the last freshet.
"'Heyo, Brer Tarrypin, whar you bin dis long-come-short?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Heyo, Brer Terrapin, where you been this long-come-short?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Lounjun 'roun', Brer Fox, lounjun 'roun',' sez Brer Tarrypin. "'Lounging around, Brer Fox, lounging around,' says Brer Terrapin.
har1880.2007.001.0071.jpg [illustration - BRER FOX TACKLES BRER TARRYPIN. ]
har1880.2007.001.0072.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0073.jpg
"'You don't look sprucy like you did, Brer Tarrypin,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'You don't look sprucy like you did, Brer Terrapin,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Lounjun 'roun' en suffer'n',' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Lounging around and suffering,' says Brer Terrapin, says he.
"Den de talk sorter run on like dis: "Then the talk sort of run on like this:
"'W'at ail you, Brer Tarrypin? Yo' eye look mighty red,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'What ail you, Brer Terrapin? Your eye look mighty red,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Lor', Brer Fox, you dunner w'at trubble is. You ain't bin lounjun 'roun' en suffer'n',' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Lord, Brer Fox, you don't know what trouble is. You ain't been lounging around and suffering,' says Brer Terrapin, says he.
"'Bofe eyes red, en you look like you mighty weak, Brer Tarrypin,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Both eyes red, and you look like you mighty weak, Brer Terrapin,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Lor', Brer Fox, you dunner w'at truble is,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Lord, Brer Fox, you don't know what trouble is,' says Brer Terrapin, says he.
"'W'at ail you now, Brer Tarrypin?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'What ail you now, Brer Terrapin?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Tuck a walk de udder day, en man come 'long en sot de fiel' a-fier. Lor', Brer Fox, you dunner w'at trubble is,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Took a walk the other day, and man come along and set the field a-fire. Lord, Brer Fox, you don't know what trouble is,' says Brer Terrapin, says he.
"'How you git out de fier, Brer Tarrypin?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'How you get out the fire, Brer Terrapin?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Sot en tuck it, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Sat and took it, Brer Fox,' says Brer Terrapin, says he. "'Sot en tuck it, en de smoke sif' in my eye, en de fier scorch my back,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee. "'Sat and took it, and the smoke sift in my eye, and the fire scorch my back,' says Brer Terrapin, says he.
"'Likewise hit bu'n yo' tail off,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Likewise it burned your tail off,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Oh, no, dar's de tail, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee, en wid dat he oncurl his tail fum under de shell, en no sooner did he do dat dan Brer Fox grab it, en holler out: "'Oh, no, there's the tail, Brer Fox,' says Brer Terrapin, says he, and with that he uncurl his tail from under the shell, and no sooner did he do that than Brer Fox grab it, and holler out:
"'Oh, yes, Brer Tarrypin! Oh,
yes! En so youer de
"'Oh, yes, Brer Terrapin! Oh, yes! And so you're
the
har1880.2007.001.0074.jpg
man w'at lam me on de head at Miss Meadows's is you?
Youer in wid Brer Rabbit, is you? Well, I'm gwineter out you.'
man what lam me on the head at Miss Meadows's is you?
You're in with Brer Rabbit, is you? Well, I'm going to out you.'
"Brer Tarrypin beg en beg, but 'twan't no use. Brer Fox done bin fool so much dat he look like he 'termin' fer ter have Brer Tarrypin haslett. Den Brer Tarrypin beg Brer Fox not fer ter drown 'im, but Brer Fox ain't makin' no prommus, en den he beg Brer Fox fer ter bu'n' im, kaze he done useter fier, but Brer Fox don't say nuthin'. Bimeby Brer Fox drag Brer Tarrypin off little ways b'low de spring-'ouse, en souze 'im under de water. Den Brer Tarrypin begin fer ter holler: "Brer Terrapin beg and beg, but it wasn't no use. Brer Fox done been fool so much that he look like he determined for to have Brer Terrapin haslett. Then Brer Terrapin beg Brer Fox not for to drown him, but Brer Fox ain't making no promise, and then he beg Brer Fox for to burn him, 'cause he done used to fire, but Brer Fox don't say nothing. By and by Brer Fox drag Brer Terrapin off little ways below the spring-house, and souse him under the water. Then Brer Terrapin begin for to holler:
"'Tu'n loose dat stump root en ketch holt er me—tu'n loose dat stump root en ketch holt er me.' "'Turn loose that stump root and catch hold of me—turn loose that stump root and catch hold of me.'
"Brer Fox he holler back:
"'I ain't got holt er no stump root, en I is got holt er you.' "'I ain't got hold of no stump root, and I is got hold of you.'
"Brer Tarrypin he keep on holler'n: "Terrapin he keep on hollering:
"'Ketch holt er me—I'm a drownin'—I'm a drownin' —tu'n loose de stump root en ketch holt er me.' "'Catch hold of me—I'm a drowning—I'm a drowning—turn loose the stump root and catch hold of me.'
"Sho nuff, Brer Fox tu'n loose de tail, en Brer Tarrypin, he went down ter de bottom—kerblunkity-blink!" "Sure enough, Brer Fox turn loose the tail, and Brer Terrapin he went down to the bottom—kerblunkity-blink!"
No typographical combination or description could do justice to the guttural sonorousness—the peculiar intonation—which Uncle Remus imparted to this combination.
It was so peculiar, indeed, that the little boy asked:
"How did he go to the bottom, Uncle Remus?"
"Kerblunkity-blink!"
"Was he drowned, Uncle Remus?"
har1880.2007.001.0075.jpg
"Who? Ole man Tarrypin? Is you drowndid w'en yo' ma tucks you in de bed?" "Who? Old man Terrapin? Is you drowned when your ma tucks you in the bed?"
"Well, no," replied the little boy, dubiously.
"Ole man Tarrypin wuz at home I tell you, honey. Kerblinkity-blunk!" "Old man Tarrypin was at home I tell you, honey. Kerblinkity-blunk!"
XIII.
THE AWFUL FATE OF MR. WOLF.
Uncle Remus was half-soling one of his shoes, and his Miss Sally's little boy had been handling his awls, his hammers, and his knives to such an extent that the old man was compelled to assume a threatening attitude; but peace reigned again, and the little boy perched himself on a chair, watching Uncle Remus driving in pegs.
"Folks w'at's allers pesterin' people, en bodderin' 'longer dat w'at ain't dern, don't never come ter no good eend. Dar wuz Brer Wolf; stidder mindin' un his own bizness, he hatter take en go in pardnerships wid Brer Fox, en dey want skacely a minnit in de day dat he want atter Brer Rabbit, en he kep' on en kep' on twel fus' news you knowed he got kotch up wid—en he got kotch up wid monstus bad." "Folks what's always pestering people, and bothering along with that what ain't theirs, don't never come to no good end. There was Brer Wolf; instead of minding of his own business, he had to take and go in partnerships with Brer Fox, and they wasn't scarcely a minute in the day that he wasn't after Brer Rabbit, and he kept on and kept on till first news you knowed he got catch up with—and he got catch up with monstrous bad."
"Goodness, Uncle Remus! I thought the Wolf let the Rabbit alone, after he tried to fool him about the Fox being dead."
"Better lemme tell dish yer my way. Bimeby hit'll
be yo' bed time, en Miss Sally'll be a hollerin' atter you, en
"Better let me tell this here my way. By and by it'll be your bedtime,
and Miss Sally'll be a hollering after you, and
har1880.2007.001.0076.jpg
you'll be a whimplin' roun', en den Mars John'll
fetch up de re'r wid dat ar strop w'at I made fer 'im."
you'll be a whimpering around, and then Master John'll fetch up the
rear with that there strap what I made for him."
The child laughed, and playfully shook his fist in the simple, serious face of the venerable old darkey, but said no more. Uncle Remus waited awhile to be sure there was to be no other demonstration, and then proceeded:
"Brer Rabbit ain't see no peace w'atsumever. He
can't leave home 'cep' Brer Wolf 'ud make a raid en
"Brer Rabbit ain't see no peace whatsoever. He can't leave home except
Brer Wolf would make a raid and
tote off some er de fambly. Brer Rabbit b'ilt 'im a
straw house, en hit wuz tored down; den he made a house outen pine-tops,
en dat went de same way; den he made 'im a bark house, en dat wuz raided
on, en eve'y time he los' a
tote off some of the family. Brer Rabbit built him a straw house, and
it was tored down; then he made a house out of pine-tops,
and that went the same way; then he made him a bark house, and that was
raided on, and every time he lost a
har1880.2007.001.0077.jpg
house he los' wunner his chilluns. Las' Brer Rabbit
got mad, he did, en cust, en den he went off, he did, en got some
kyarpinters, en dey b'ilt 'im a plank house wid rock foundashuns. Atter
dat he could have some peace en quietness. He could go out en pass de
time er day wid his nabers, en come back en set by de fier, en smoke his
pipe, en read de newspapers same like enny man w'at got a fambly. He made
a hole, he did, in de cellar whar de little Rabbits could hide out w'en
dar wuz much uv a racket in de naberhood, en de latch er de front do'
kotch on de inside. Brer Wolf, he see how de lan' lay, he did, en he lay
low. De little Rabbits wuz mighty skittish, but hit got so dat cole
chills ain't run up Brer Rabbit's back no mo' w'en he heerd Brer Wolf go
gallopin' by.
house he lost one of his children. Last Brer Rabbit got mad, he did,
and cursed, and then he went off, he did, and got some carpenters, and
they built him a plank house with rock foundations. After that he could
have some peace and quietness. He could go out and pass the time of day
with his neighbors, and come back and set by the fire, and smoke his
pipe, and read the newspapers same like any man what got a family. He
made a hole, he did, in the cellar where the little Rabbits could hide
out when there was much of a racket in the neighborhood and the latch of
the front door catch on the inside. Brer Wolf, he see how the land lay,
he did, and he lay low. The little Rabbits was mighty skittish, but it
got so that cold chills ain't run up Brer Rabbit's back no more when he
heard Brer Wolf go galloping by.
"Bimeby, one day w'en Brer Rabbit wuz fixin' fer ter call on Miss Coon, he heerd a monstus fuss en clatter up de big road, en 'mos' 'fo' he could fix his years fer ter lissen, Brer Wolf run in de do'. De little Rabbits dey went inter dere hole in de cellar, dey did, like blowin' out a cannle. Brer Wolf wuz far'ly kivver'd wid mud, en mighty nigh outer win'. "By and by, one day when Brer Rabbit was fixing for to call on Miss Coon, he heard a monstrous fuss and clatter up the big road, and almost before he could fix his ears for to listen, Brer Wolf run in the door. The little Rabbits they went into their hole in the cellar, they did, like blowing out a candle. Brer Wolf was fairly covered with mud, and mighty nigh out of wind.
"'Oh, do pray save me, Brer Rabbit!' sez Brer Wolf, sezee. 'Do please, Brer Rabbit!' de dogs is atter me, en dey'll t'ar me up. Don't you year um comin'? Oh, do please save me, Brer Rabbit! Hide me some'rs whar de dogs won't git me.' "'Oh, do pray save me, Brer Rabbit!' says Brer Wolf, says he. 'Do please, Brer Rabbit!' the dogs is after me, and they'll tear me up. Don't you hear them coming? Oh, do please save me, Brer Rabbit! Hide me somewheres where the dogs won't get me.'
"No quicker sed dan done. "No quicker said than done.
"'Jump in dat big chist dar, Brer Wolf,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee; 'jump in dar en make yo'se'f at home.' "'Jump in that big chest there, Brer Wolf,' says Brer Rabbit, says he; 'jump in there and make yourself at home.'
har1880.2007.001.0078.jpg
"In jump Brer Wolf, down come de led, en inter de hasp went de hook, en dar Mr. Wolf wuz. Den Brer Rabbit went ter de lookin'-glass, he did, en wink at hisse'f, en den he drawd de rockin'-cheer in front er de fier, he did, en tuck a big chaw terbarker." "In jump Brer Wolf, down come the lid, and into the hasp went the hook, and there Mr. Wolf was. Then Brer Rabbit went to the looking-glass, he did, and wink at hisself, and then he drawed the rocking-chair in front of the fire, he did, and took a big chaw tobacco."
"Tobacco, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy, incredulously.
"Rabbit terbarker, honey. You know dis yer life ev'lastin' w'at Miss Sally puts 'mong de cloze in de trunk; well, dat's rabbit terbarker. Den Brer Rabbit sot dar long time, he did, turnin' his mine over en wukken his thinkin' masheen. Bimeby he got up, en sorter stir 'roun'. Den Brer Wolf open up: "Rabbit tobacco, honey. You know this here life everlasting what Miss Sally puts among the clothes in the trunk; well, that's rabbit tobacco. Then Brer Rabbit sat there long time, he did, turning his mind over and working his thinking machine. By and by he got up, and sort of stir around. Then Brer Wolf open up:
"'Is de dogs all gone, Brer Rabbit?' "'Is the dogs all gone, Brer Rabbit?'
"'Seem like I hear one un um smellin' roun' de chimbly-cornder des now.' "'Seem like I hear one of them smelling around the chimney-corner just now.'
"Den Brer Rabbit git de kittle en fill it full er water, en put it on de fier. "Then Brer Rabbit get the kettle and fill it full of water, and put it on the fire.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?'
"'I'm fixin' fer ter make you a nice cup er tea, Brer Wolf.' "'I'm fixing for to make you a nice cup of tea, Brer Wolf.'
"Den Brer Rabbit went ter de cubberd en git de gimlet, en commence for ter bo' little holes in de chist-led. "Then Brer Rabbit went to the cupboard and get the gimlet, and commence for to bore little holes in the chest-lid.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?'
"'I'm a bo'in' little holes so you kin get bref, Brer Wolf.' "'I'm a boring little holes so you can get breath, Brer Wolf.'
"Den Brer Rabbit went out en git some mo' wood, en fling it on de fier. "Then Brer Rabbit went out and get some more wood, and fling it on the fire.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?'
har1880.2007.001.0079.jpg
"'I'm a chunkin' up de fier so you won't git cole, Brer Wolf.' "'I'm a chunking up the fire so you won't get cold, Brer Wolf.'
"Den Brer Rabbit went down inter de cellar en fotch out all his chilluns. "Then Brer Rabbit went down into the cellar and fetch out all his children.
"'W'at you doin' now, Brer Rabbit?' "'What you doing now, Brer Rabbit?'
"'I'm a tellin' my chilluns w'at a nice man you is, Brer Wolf.' "'I'm a telling my children what a nice man you is, Brer Wolf.'
"En de chilluns, dey had ter put der han's on der moufs fer ter keep fum laffin'. Den Brer Rabbit he got de kittle en commenced fer to po' de hot water on de chist-lid. "And the children, they had to put their hands on their mouths for to keep from laughing. Then Brer Rabbit he got the kettle and commenced for to pour the hot water on the chest-lid.
"'W'at dat I hear, Brer Rabbit?' "'What that I hear, Brer Rabbit?'
"'You hear de win' a blowin', Brer Wolf.' "'You hear the wind a blowing, Brer Wolf.'
"Den de water begin fer ter sif' thoo. "Then the water begin for to sift through.
"'W'at dat I feel, Brer Rabbit?' "'What that I feel, Brer Rabbit?'
"'You feels de fleas a bitin', Brer Wolf.' "'You feels the fleas a biting, Brer Wolf.'
"'Dey er bitin' mighty hard, Brer Rabbit.' "'They are biting mighty hard, Brer Rabbit.'
"'Tu'n over on de udder side, Brer Wolf.' "'Turn over on the other side, Brer Wolf.'
"'W'at dat I feel now, Brer Rabbit?' "'What that I feel now, Brer Rabbit?'
"'Still you feels de fleas, Brer Wolf.' "'Still you feels the fleas, Brer Wolf.'
"'Dey er eatin' me up, Brer Rabbit,' en dem wuz de las' words er Brer Wolf, kase de scaldin' water done de bizness. "'They are eating me up, Brer Rabbit,' and them was the last words of Brer Wolf, 'cause the scalding water done the business.
"Den Brer Rabbit call in his nabers, he did, en dey hilt a reg'lar juberlee; en ef you go ter Brer Rabbit's house right now, I dunno but w'at you'll fine Brer Wolf's hide hangin' in de back-po'ch, en all bekaze he wuz so bizzy wid udder fo'kses doin's." "Then Brer Rabbit call in his neighbors, he did, and they held a regular jubilee; and if you go to Brer Rabbit's house right now, I don't know but what you'll find Brer Wolf's hide hanging in the back-porch, and all because he was so busy with other folks' doings."
har1880.2007.001.0080.jpg
XIV.
MR. FOX AND THE DECEITFUL FROGS.
When the little boy ran in to see Uncle Remus the night after he had told him of the awful fate of Brer Wolf, the only response to his greeting was:
"I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker!"
No explanation could convey an adequate idea of the intonation and pronunciation which Uncle Remus brought to bear upon this wonderful word. Those who can recall to mind the peculiar gurgling, jerking, liquid sound made by pouring water from a large jug, or the sound produced by throwing several stones in rapid succession into a pond of deep water, may be able to form a very faint idea of the sound, but it can not be reproduced in print. The little boy was astonished.
"What did you say, Uncle Remus?"
"I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker! I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker!"
"What is that?"
"Dat's Tarrypin talk, dat is. Bless yo' soul,
honey,"
"That's Terrapin talk, that is. Bless your soul, honey,"
continued the old man, brightening 'up,
"w'en you git ole ez me—w'en you see w'at I sees,
en year w'at I years—de creeturs dat you can't talk wid 'll be mighty
skase—dey will dat. W'y, ders er old gray rat w'at uses 'bout yer, en
time atter time he comes out w'en you all done gone ter bed en sets up
dar in de cornder en dozes, en me en him talks by de 'our; en w'at dat
ole rat dunno ain't down in de
"when you get old as me—when you see what I sees, and hear what I
hears—the creatures that you can't talk with will be mighty scarce—they
will that. Why, there's er old gray rat what uses
about here, and time after time he comes out when you all done gone to
bed and sets up there in the corner and dozes, and me and him talks by
the hour; and what that old rat don't know ain't down in the
har1880.2007.001.0081.jpg
spellin' book. Des now, w'en you run in and broke
me up, I wuz fetchin' inter my mine w'at Brer Tarrypin say ter Brer Fox
w'en he turn 'im loose in de branch."
spelling book. Just now, when you run in and broke me up, I was
fetching into my mind what Brer Terrapin say to Brer Fox when he turn him
loose in the branch."
"What did he say, Uncle Remus?"
"Dat w'at he said—I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker! Brer Tarrypin wuz at de bottom er de pon', en he talk back, he did, in bubbles—I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker! Brer Fox, he ain't sayin' nuthin', but Brer Bull-Frog, settin' on de bank, he hear Brer Tarrypin, he did, en he holler back: "That what he said—I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker! Brer Terrapin was at the bottom of the pond, and he talk back, he did, in bubbles—I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker! Brer Fox, he ain't saying nothing, but Brer Bull-Frog, setting on the bank, he hear Brer Terrapin, he did, and he holler back:
"'Jug-er-rum-kum-dum! Jug-er-rum-kum-dum!'
"Den n'er Frog holler out: "Then another Frog holler out:
"'Knee-deep! Knee-deep!'
"Den ole Brer Bull-Frog, he holler back: "Then old Brer Bull-Frog, he holler back:
"'Don't-you-berlieve-'im! Don't-you-berlieve-'im!' "'Don't-you-believe-him! Don't-you-believe-him!'
"Den de bubbles come up fum Brer Tarrypin: "Then the bubbles come up from Brer Terrapin:
"'I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker!'
"Den n'er Frog sing out: "Then another Frog sing out:
"'Wade in! Wade in!'
"Den ole Brer Bull-Frog talk thoo his ho'seness: "Then old Brer Bull-Frog talk through his hoarseness:
"'Dar-you'll-fine-yo'-brudder! Dar-you'll-fine-yo'-brudder!' "'There-you'll-find-your-brother! There-you'll-find-your-brother!
"Sho nuff, Brer Fox look over de bank, he did, en dar wuz n'er Fox lookin' at 'im outer de water. Den he retch out fer ter shake han's, en in he went, heels over head, en Brer Tarrypin bubble out: "Sure enough, Brer Fox look over the bank, he did, and there was another Fox looking at him out of the water. Then he reach out for to shake hands, and in he went, heels over head, and Brer Terrapin bubble out:
"'I-doom-er-ker-kum-mer-ker!'"
"Was the Fox drowned, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"He wern't zackly drowndid, honey,"
"He weren't exactly drowned, honey,"
replied the old
har1880.2007.001.0082.jpg
man,
with an air of cautious reserve.
"He did manage fer ter scramble out, but a little
mo' en de Mud Turkle would er got 'im, en den he'd er bin made hash un
worril widout een'."
"He did manage for to scramble out, but a little more and the Mud
Turtle would have got him, and then he'd have been made hash
un
worril without een'."
XV.
MR. FOX GOES A-HUNTING, BUT MR. RABBIT BAGS THE GAME.
"Atter Brer Fox hear 'bout how Brer Rabbit done Brer Wolf," "After Brer Fox hear about how Brer Rabbit done Brer Wolf," said Uncle Remus, scratching his head with the point of his awl, "he 'low, he did, dat he better not be so brash, en he sorter let Brer Rabbit 'lone. Dey wuz all time seein' one nudder, en 'bunnunce er times Brer Fox could er nab Brer Rabbit, but eve'y time he got de chance, his mine 'ud sorter rezume 'bout Brer Wolf, en he let Brer Rabbit 'lone. Bimeby dey 'gun ter git kinder familious wid wunner nudder like dey useter, en it got so Brer Fox'd call on Brer Rabbit, en dey'd set up en smoke der pipes, dey would, like no ha'sh feelin's 'd ever rested 'twixt um. "he allow, he did, that he better not be so brash, and he sort of let Brer Rabbit alone. They was all time seeing one another, and abundance of times Brer Fox could have nab Brer Rabbit, but every time he got the chance, his mind would sort of resume about Brer Wolf, and he let Brer Rabbit alone. By and by they begun to get kind of familiar with one another like they used to, and it got so Brer Fox'd call on Brer Rabbit, and they'd set up and smoke their pipes, they would, like no harsh feelings had ever rested betwixt them.
"Las', one day Brer Fox come 'long all rig out, en
ax Brer Rabbit fer ter go huntin' wid 'im, but Brer Rabbit, he sorter
feel lazy, en he tell Brer Fox dat he got some udder fish fer ter fry.
Brer Fox feel mighty sorry, he did, but he say he b'leeve he try his han'
enny how, en off he put. He wuz gone all day, en he had a monstus streak
er luck, Brer Fox did, en he bagged a sight er game. Bimeby, to'rds de
"Last, one day Brer Fox come along all rig out, and
ask Brer Rabbit for to go hunting with him, but Brer Rabbit,
he sort of feel lazy, and he tell Brer Fox that he got some other fish
for to fry. Brer Fox feel mighty sorry, he did, but he say he believe he
try his hand any how, and off he put. He was gone all day, and he had a
monstrous streak of luck, Brer Fox did, and he bagged a sight of game. By
and by, towards the
har1880.2007.001.0083.jpg
shank er de evenin', Brer Rabbit sorter stretch
hisse'f, he did, en 'low hit's mos' time fer Brer Fox fer ter git 'long
home. Den Brer Rabbit, he went'n mounted a stump fer ter see ef he could
year Brer Fox comin'. He ain't bin dar long, twel sho' nuff, yer come
Brer Fox thoo de woods, singing like a nigger at a frolic. Brer Rabbit,
he lipt down off'n de stump, he did, en lay down in de road en make like
he dead. Brer Fox he come 'long, he did, en see Brer Rabbit layin' dar.
He tu'n 'im over, he did, en 'zamine 'im, en say, sezee:
shank of the evening, Brer Rabbit sort of stretch hisself, he did, and
allow it's almost time for Brer Fox for to get along home. Then Brer
Rabbit, he went and mounted a stump for to see if he could hear Brer Fox
coming. He ain't been there long, til sure enough, here come Brer Fox
through the woods, singing like a nigger at a frolic. Brer Rabbit, he
leaped down off of the stump, he did, and lay down in the road and make
like he dead. Brer Fox he come' along, he did, and see Brer Rabbit laying
there. He turn him over, he did, and examine him, and say, says he:
"'Dish yer rabbit dead. He look like he bin dead long time. He dead, but he mighty fat. He de fattes' rabbit w'at I ever see, but he bin dead too long. I feard ter take 'im home,' sezee. "'This here rabbit dead. He look like he been dead long time. He dead, but he mighty fat. He the fattest rabbit what I ever see, but he been dead too long. I feared to take him home,' says he.
"Brer Rabbit ain't sayin' nuthin'. Brer Fox, he sorter lick his chops, but he went on en lef' Brer Rabbit layin' in de road. Dreckly he wuz outer sight, Brer Rabbit, he jump up, he did, en run roun' thoo de woods en git befo Brer Fox agin. Brer Fox, he come up, en dar lay Brer Rabbit, periently cole en stiff. Brer Fox, he look at Brer Rabbit, en he sorter study. Atter while he onslung his game-bag, en say ter hisse'f, sezee: "Brer Rabbit ain't saying nothing. Brer Fox, he sort of lick his chops, but he went on and left Brer Rabbit laying in the road. Directly he was out of sight, Brer Rabbit, he jump up, he did, and run round through the woods and get before Brer Fox again. Brer Fox, he come up, and there lay Brer Rabbit, apparently cold and stiff. Brer Fox, he look at Brer Rabbit, and he sort of study. After while he unslung his game-bag, and say to hisself, sezee:
"'Deze yer rabbits gwine ter was'e. I'll des 'bout leave my game yer, en I'll go back'n git dat udder rabbit, en I'll make fokes b'leeve dat I'm ole man Hunter fum Huntsville,' sezee. "'These here rabbits going to waste. I'll just about leave my game here, and I'll go back and get that other rabbit, and I'll make folks believe that I'm old man Hunter from Huntsville,' says he.
"En wid dat he drapt his game en loped back up de
road atter de udder rabbit, en w'en he got outer sight, ole Brer Rabbit,
he snatch up Brer Fox game en
"And with that he dropped his game and loped back up the road after the
other rabbit, and when he got out of sight, old Brer Rabbit, he snatch up
Brer Fox game and
har1880.2007.001.0084.jpg
put out fer home. Nex' time he see Brer Fox, he
holler out:
put out for home. Next time he see Brer Fox, he holler out:
"'What you kill de udder day,' Brer Fox?' sezee. "'What you kill the other day,' Brer Fox?' says he.
Den Brer Fox, he sorter koam his flank wid his tongue, en holler back: Then Brer Fox, he sort of comb his flank with his tongue, and holler back:
"'I kotch a han'ful er hard sense, Brer Rabbit,' sezee. "'I catch a handful of hard sense, Brer Rabbit,' says he.
"Den ole Brer Rabbit, he laff, he did, en up en 'spon,' sezee: "Then old Brer Rabbit, he laugh, he did, and up and respond, says he:
"'Ef I'd a know'd you wuz atter dat, Brer Fox, I'd a loant you some er mine,' sezee." "'If I'd a knowed you was after that, Brer Fox, I'd a loaned you some of mine,' says he."
XVI.
OLD MR. RABBIT, HE'S A GOOD FISHERMAN.
"Brer Rabbit en Brer Fox wuz like some children w'at I knows un," "Brer Rabbit and Brer Fox was like some children what I knows of," said Uncle Remus, regarding the little boy, who had come to hear another story, with an affectation of great solemnity. "Bofe un um wuz allers atter wunner nudder, a prankin' en a pester'n 'roun', but Brer Rabbit did had some peace, kaze Brer Fox done got skittish 'bout puttin' de clamps on Brer Rabbit. "Both of them was always after one another, a pranking and a pestering around, but Brer Rabbit did had some peace, 'cause Brer Fox done got skittish about putting the clamps on Brer Rabbit.
"One day, w'en Brer Rabbit, en Brer Fox, en Brer
Coon, en Brer B'ar, en a whole lot un um wuz clearin' up a new groun' fer
ter plant a roas'n'year patch, de sun 'gun ter git sorter hot, en Brer
Rabbit he got tired; but he didn't let on, kaze he 'fear'd de balance un
um'd call 'im
"One day, when Brer Rabbit, and Brer Fox, and Brer Coon, and Brer Bear,
and a whole lot of them was clearing up a new ground for to plant a
roasting ear patch, the sun begun to get sort of hot, and Brer Rabbit he
got tired; but he didn't let on, 'cause he afeard the balance of them'd
call him
har1880.2007.001.0085.jpg
lazy, en he keep on totin' off trash en pilin' up
bresh, twel bimeby he holler out dat he gotter brier in his han', en den
he take'n slip off, en hunt fer cool place fer ter res'. Atter w'ile he
come 'crosst a well wid a bucket hangin' in it.
lazy, and he keep on toting off trash and piling up brush, til by and
by he holler out that he got a briar in his hand, and then he take and
slip off, and hunt for cool place for to rest. After while he come across
a well with a bucket hanging in it.
"'Dat look cool,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en cool I speck she is. I'll des 'bout git in dar en take a nap,' en wid dat in he jump, he did, en he ain't no sooner fix hisse'f dan de bucket 'gun ter go down." "'That look cool,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and cool I expect she is. I'll just about get in there and take a nap,' and with that in he jump, he did, and he ain't no sooner fix hisself than the bucket begun to go down."
"Wasn't the Rabbit scared, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"Honey, dey ain't bin no wusser skeer'd beas' sence de worril begin dan dish yer same Brer Rabbit. He far'ly had a ager. He know whar he cum fum, but he dunner whar he gwine. Dreckly he feel de bucket hit de water, en dar she sot, but Brer Rabbit he keep mighty still, kaze he dunner w'at minnit gwineter be de nex'. He des lay dar en shuck en shiver. "Honey, they ain't been no worser scared beast since the world begin than this here same Brer Rabbit. He fairly had a ague. He know where he come from, but he don't know where he going. Directly he feel the bucket hit the water, and there she sat, but Brer Rabbit he keep mighty still, 'cause he don't know what minute going to be the next. He just lay there and shook and shiver.
"Brer Fox allers got one eye on Brer Rabbit, en w'en he slip off fum de new groun', Brer Fox he sneak atter 'im. "Brer Fox always got one eye on Brer Rabbit, and when he slip off from the new ground, Brer Fox he sneak after him. He know Brer Rabbit wuz atter some projick er nudder, en he tuck'n crope off, he did, en watch 'im. Brer Fox see Brer Rabbit come to de well en stop, en den he see 'im jump in de bucket, en den, lo en beholes, he see 'im go down outer sight. Brer Fox wuz de mos' 'stonish Fox dat you ever laid eyes on. He sot off dar in de bushes en study en study, but he don't make no head ner tails ter dis kinder bizness. Den he say ter hisse'f, sezee: He know Brer Rabbit was after some project or another, and he took and crept off, he did, and watch him. Brer Fox see Brer Rabbit come to the well and stop, and then he see him jump in the bucket, and then, lo and behold, he see him go down out of sight. Brer Fox was the most astonish Fox that you ever laid eyes on. He sat off there in the bushes and study and study, but he don't make no head nor tails to this kind of business. Then he say to hisself, says he:
"'Well, ef dis don't bang my
times,' sezee, 'den Joe's
"'Well, if this don't bang my times,' says he,
'then Joe's
har1880.2007.001.0086.jpg
dead en Sal's a widder. Right
down dar in dat well Brer Rabbit keep his money hid, en ef 'tain't dat
den he done gone en 'skiver'd a gole-mine, en ef 'tain't dat, den I'm
a gwineter see w'at's in dar,' sezee.
dead and Sal's a widow. Right down there in that
well Brer Rabbit keep his money hid, and if it ain't that then he done
gone and discovered a gold-mine, and if it ain't that, then I'm a
going to see what's in there,' says he.
"Brer Fox crope up little nigher, he did, en lissen, but he don't year no fuss, en he keep on gittin' nigher, en yit he don't year nuthin'. Bimeby he git up close en peep down, but he don't see nuthin' en he don't year nuthin'. All dis time Brer Rabbit mighty nigh skeer'd outen his skin, en he fear'd fer ter move kaze de bucket might keel over en spill him out in de water. W'ile he sayin' his pra'rs over like a train er kyars runnin', ole Brer Fox holler out: "Brer Fox crept up little nigher, he did, and listen, but he don't hear no fuss, and he keep on getting nigher, and yet he don't hear nothing. By and by he get up close and peep down, but he don't see nothing and he don't hear nothing. All this time Brer Rabbit mighty nigh scared out of his skin, and he feared for to move 'cause the bucket might keel over and spill him out in the water. While he saying his prayers over like a train of cars running, old Brer Fox holler out:
"'Heyo, Brer Rabbit! Who you wizzitin' down dar?' sezee. "'Heyo, Brer Rabbit! Who you visiting down there?' says he.
"'Who? Me? Oh, I'm des a fishin', Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'I des say ter myse'f dat I'd sorter sprize you all wid a mess er fishes fer dinner, en so here I is, en dar's de fishes. I'm a fishin' fer suckers, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Who? Me? Oh, I'm just a fishing, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'I just say to myself that I'd sort of surprise you all with a mess of fishes for dinner, and so here I is, and there's the fishes. I'm a fishing for suckers, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Is dey many un um down dar, Brer Rabbit?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Is they many of them down there, Brer Rabbit?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Lot's un um, Brer Fox; scoze en scoze un um. De water is natally live wid um. Come down en he'p me haul um in, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Lot's of them, Brer Fox; scores and scores of them. The water is naturally live with them. Come down and help me haul them in, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'How I gwineter git down, Brer Rabbit?' "'How I going to get down, Brer Rabbit?'
"'Jump inter de bucket, Brer Fox. Hit'll fetch you down all safe en soun'.' "'Jump into the bucket, Brer Fox. It'll fetch you down all safe and sound.'
"Brer Rabbit talk so happy en talk so sweet dat
Brer Fox he jump in de bucket, he did, en, ez he went down,
"Brer Rabbit talk so happy and talk so sweet that Brer Fox he jump in
the bucket, he did, and, as he went down,
har1880.2007.001.0087.jpg
co'se his weight pull Brer Rabbit up. W'en dey pass
one nudder on de half-way groun', Brer Rabbit he sing out:
course his weight pull Brer Rabbit up. When they pass one another on
the half-way ground, Brer Rabbit he sing out:
As a Northern friend suggests that this story may be somewhat obscure, it may be as well to state that the well is supposed to be supplied with a rope over a wheel, or pulley, with a bucket at each end. [back]
"W'en Brer Rabbit got out, he gallop off en tole de fokes w'at de well b'long ter dat Brer Fox wuz down in dar muddyin' up de drinkin' water, en den he gallop back ter de well, en holler down ter Brer Fox: "When Brer Rabbit got out, he gallop off and told the folks what the well belong to that Brer Fox was down in there muddying up the drinking water, and then he gallop back to the well, and holler down to Brer Fox:
"What then, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy, as the old man paused.
"In des 'bout half n'our, honey, bofe un um wuz back in de new groun' wukkin des like dey never heer'd er no well, ceppin' dat eve'y now'n den Brer Rabbit'd bust out in er laff, en ole Brer Fox, he'd git a spell er de dry grins." "In just about half an hour, honey, both of them was back in the new ground working just like they never heared of no well, excepting that every now and then Brer Rabbit'd bust out in a laugh, and old Brer Fox, he'd get a spell of the dry grins."
XVII.
MR. RABBIT NIBBLES UP THE BUTTER.
"De animils en de beastesses,"
"The animals and the beasts,"
said Uncle Remus, shaking his coffee around in the bottom of his tin-cup, in
order
har1880.2007.001.0088.jpg
to gather
up all the sugar,
"dey kep' on gittin' mo' en mo' familious wid
wunner nudder, twel bimeby, 'twan't long 'fo' Brer Rabbit, en Brer Fox,
en Brer Possum got ter sorter bunchin' der perwishuns tergedder in de
same shanty. Atter w'ile de roof sorter 'gun ter leak, en one day Brer
Rabbit, en Brer Fox, en Brer Possum, 'semble fer ter see ef dey can't
kinder patch her up. Dey had a big day's work in front un um, en dey
fotch der dinner wid um. Dey lump de vittles up in one pile, en de butter
w'at Brer Fox brung, dey goes en puts in de spring-'ouse fer ter keep
cool, en den dey went ter wuk, en 'twan't long 'fo' Brer Rabbit stummuck
'gun ter sorter growl en pester 'im. Dat butter er Brer Fox sot heavy on
his mine, en his mouf water eve'y time he 'member 'bout it. Present'y he
say ter hisse'f dat he bleedzd ter have a nip at dat butter, en den he
lay his plans, he did. Fus' news you know, w'ile dey wuz all wukkin'
'long, Brer Rabbit raise his head quick en fling his years forrerd en
holler out:
"they kept on getting more and more familiar with one another, til by
and by, it wasn't long before Brer Rabbit, and Brer Fox, and Brer Possum
got to sort of bunching their possessions together in the same shanty.
After while the roof sort of begun to leak, and one day Brer Rabbit, and
Brer Fox, and Brer Possum, assemble for to see if they can't kind of
patch her up. They had a big day's work in front of them, and they fetch
their dinner with them. They lump the vittles up in one pile, and the
butter what Brer Fox brung, they goes and puts in the spring-house for to
keep cool, and then they went to work, and it wasn't long before Brer
Rabbit stomach begun to sort of growl and pester him. That butter of Brer
Fox sat heavy on his mind, and his mouth water every time he remember
about it. Presently he say to hisself that he pleased to have a nip at
that butter, and then he lay his plans, he did. First news you know,
while they was all working along, Brer Rabbit raise his head quick and
fling his ears forward and holler out:
"'Here I is. W'at you want wid me?' en off he put like sump'n wuz atter 'im. "'Here I is. What you want with me?' and off he put like something was after him.
"He sallied 'roun', ole Brer Rabbit did, en atter he make sho dat nobody ain't foller'n un 'im, inter de spring-'ouse he bounces, en dar he stays twel he git a bait er butter. Den he santer on back en go to wuk. "He sallied around, old Brer Rabbit did, and after he make sure that nobody ain't following of him, into the spring-house he bounces, and there he stays til he get a bait of butter. Then he saunter on back and go to work.
"'Whar you bin?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Where you been?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'I hear my chilluns callin' me,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en I hatter go see w'at dey want. My ole 'oman done gone en tuck mighty sick,' sezee. "'I hear my children calling me,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and I had to go see what they want. My old woman done gone and took mighty sick,' says he.
"Dey wuk on twel bimeby de butter tas'e so good dat
"They work on til by and by the butter taste so good that
har1880.2007.001.0089.jpg
ole Brer Rabbit want some mo'. Den he raise up his
head, he did, en holler out:
old Brer Rabbit want some more. Then he raise up his head, he did, and
holler out:
"'Heyo! Hole on! I'm a comin'!' en off he put. "'Heyo! Hold on! I'm a coming!' and off he put.
"Dis time he stay right smart w'ile, en w'en he git back Brer Fox ax him whar he bin. "This time he stay right smart while, and when he get back Brer Fox ask him where he been.
"'I bin ter see my ole 'oman, en she's a sinkin,' sezee. "'I been to see my old woman, and she's a sinking,' says he.
"Dreckly Brer Rabbit hear um callin' 'im ag'in en off he goes, en dis time, bless yo' soul, he gits de butter out so clean dat he kin see hisse'f in de bottom er de bucket. He scrape it clean en lick it dry, en den he go back ter wuk lookin' mo samer dan a nigger w'at de patter-rollers bin had holt un. "Directly Brer Rabbit hear them calling him again and off he goes, and this time, bless your soul, he gets the butter out so clean that he can see hisself in the bottom of the bucket. He scrape it clean and lick it dry, and then he go back to work looking more samer than a nigger what the patrollers been had hold of.
"'How's yo' ole 'oman dis time?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'How's your old woman this time?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'I'm oblije ter you, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'but I'm fear'd she's done gone by now,' en dat sorter make Brer Fox en Brer Possum feel in moanin' wid Brer Rabbit. "'I'm obliged to you, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'but I'm feared she's done gone by now,' and that sort of make Brer Fox and Brer Possum feel in moaning with Brer Rabbit.
"Bimeby, w'en dinner-time come, dey all got out der vittles, but Brer Rabbit keep on lookin' lonesome, en Brer Fox en Brer Possum dey sorter rustle roun' fer ter see ef dey can't make Brer Rabbit feel sorter splimmy." "By and by, when dinner-time come, they all got out their vittles, but Brer Rabbit keep on looking lonesome, and Brer Fox and Brer Possum they sort of rustle round for to see if they can't make Brer Rabbit feel sort of splimmy."
"What is that, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"Sorter splimmy-splammy, honey—sorter like he in a crowd—sorter like his ole 'oman ain't dead ez she mout be. You know how fokes duz w'en dey gits whar people's a moanin'." "Sort of splimmy-splammy, honey—sort of like he in a crowd—sort of like his old woman ain't dead as she might be. You know how folks does when they gets where people's a moanin'."
The little boy didn't know, fortunately for him, and Uncle Remus went on:
"Brer Fox en Brer Possum rustle roun', dey did, gittin out de vittles, en bimeby Brer Fox, he say, sezee: "Brer Fox and Brer Possum rustle around, they did, getting out the vittles, and by and by Brer Fox, he say, says he:
har1880.2007.001.0090.jpg
"'Brer Possum, you run down ter de spring en fetch de butter, en I'll sail 'roun' yer en set de table,' sezee. "'Brer Possum, you run down to the spring and fetch the butter, and I'll sail around here and set the table,' says he.
"Brer Possum, he lope off atter de butter, en dreckly here he come lopin' back wid his years a trimblin' en his tongue a hangin' out. Brer Fox, he holler out: "Brer Possum, he lope off after the butter, and directly here he come loping back with his ears a trembling and his tongue a hanging out. Brer Fox, he holler out:
"'W'at de matter now, Brer Possum?' sezee. "'What the matter now, Brer Possum?' says he.
"'You all better run yer, fokes,' sez Brer Possum, sezee. 'De las' drap er dat butter done gone!' "'You all better run here, folks,' says Brer Possum, says he. 'The last drop of that butter done gone!'
"'Whar she gone?' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'Where she gone?' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Look like she dry up,' sez Brer Possum, sezee. "'Look like she dry up,' says Brer Possum, says he.
"Den Brer Rabbit, he look sorter sollum, he did, en he up'n say, sezee: "Then Brer Rabbit, he look sort of solemn, he did, and he up and say, says he:
"'I speck dat butter melt in somebody mouf,' sezee. "'I expect that butter melt in somebody mouth,' says he.
"Den dey went down ter de spring wid Brer Possum,
en sho nuff de butter done gone. W'iles dey wuz sputin' over der
wunderment, Brer Rabbit say he see tracks all 'roun' dar, en he p'int out
dat ef dey'll all go ter sleep, he kin ketch de chap w'at stole de
butter. Den dey all lie down en Brer Fox en Brer Possum dey soon drapt
off ter sleep, but Brer Rabbit he stay 'wake, en w'en de time come he
raise up easy en smear Brer Possum mouf wid de butter on his paws, en den
he run off en nibble up de bes' er de dinner w'at dey lef' layin' out, en
den he come back en wake up Brer Fox, en show 'im de butter on Brer
Possum mouf. Den dey wake up Brer Possum, en tell 'im 'bout it, but c'ose
Brer Possum 'ny it ter de las'. Brer Fox, dough, he's a kinder lawyer, en
he argafy dis way—dat Brer Possum wuz de fus one at de butter, en de fus
one fer ter miss it, en mo'n dat, dar hang de signs on his mouf. Brer
Possum
"Then they went down to the spring with Brer Possum, and sure enough
the butter done gone. While they was disputing over their wonderment,
Brer Rabbit say he see tracks all around there, and he point out that if
they'll all go to sleep, he can catch the chap what stole the butter.
Then they all lie down and Brer Fox and Brer Possum they soon dropped off
to sleep, but Brer Rabbit he stay awake, and when the time come he raise
up easy and smear Brer Possum mouth with the butter on his paws, and then
he run off and nibble up the best of the dinner what they left laying
out, and then he come back and wake up Brer Fox, and show him the butter
on Brer Possum mouth. Then they wake up Brer Possum, and tell him about
it, but course Brer Possum deny it to the last. Brer Fox, though, he's a
kind of lawyer, and he argufy this way—that Brer Possum was the first one
at the butter, and the first one for to miss it, and more than that,
there hang the signs on his mouth. Brer Possum
har1880.2007.001.0091.jpg
see dat dey got 'im jammed up in a cornder, en den
he up en say dat de way fer ter ketch de man w'at stole de butter is ter
b'il' a big bresh-heap en set her afier, en all han's try ter jump over,
en de one w'at fall in, den he de chap w'at stole de butter. Brer Rabbit
en Brer Fox dey bofe 'gree, dey did, en dey whirl in en b'il' de
bresh-heap, en dey b'il' her high en dey b'il' her wide, en den dey totch
her off. W'en she got ter blazin' up good, Brer Rabbit, he tuck de fus
turn. He sorter step back, en look 'roun' en giggle, en over he went mo'
samer dan a bird flyin'. Den come Brer Fox. He got back little fudder, en
spit on his han's, en lit out en made de jump, en he come so nigh gittin'
in dat de een' er his tail kotch afier. Ain't you never see no fox,
honey?"
see that they got him jammed up in a corner, and then he up and say
that the way for to catch the man what stole the butter is to build a big
brush-heap and set her afire, and all hands try to jump over, and the one
what fall in, then he the chap what stole the butter. Brer Rabbit and
Brer Fox they both agree, they did, and they whirl in and build the
brush-heap, and they build her high and they build her wide, and then
they touch her off. When she got to blazing up good, Brer Rabbit, he took
the first turn. He sort of step back, and look around and giggle, and
over he went more samer than a bird flying. Then come Brer Fox. He got
back little further, and spit on his hands, and lit out and made the
jump, and he come so nigh getting in that the end of his tail catch
afire. Ain't you never see no fox, honey?"
inquired Uncle Remus, in a tone that implied both conciliation and
information.
The little boy thought probably he had, but he wouldn't commit himself.
"Well, den," "Well, then," continued the old man, "nex' time you see one un um, you look right close en see ef de een' er his tail ain't w'ite. Hit's des like I tell you. Dey b'ars de skyar er dat bresh-heap down ter dis day. Dey er marked—dat's w'at dey is—dey er marked." "next time you see one of them, you look right close and see if the end of his tail ain't white. It's just like I tell you. They bears the scar of that brush-heap down to this day. They are marked—that's what they is—they are marked."
"And what about Brother Possum?" asked the little boy.
"Ole Brer Possum, he tuck a runnin' start, he did, en he come lumberin' 'long, en he lit—kerblam!—right in de middle er de fier, en dat wuz de las' er ole Brer Possum." "Old Brer Possum, he took a running start, he did, and he come lumbering along, and he lit—kerblam!—right in the middle of the fire, and that was the last of old Brer Possum."
"But, Uncle Remus, Brother Possum didn't steal the
har1880.2007.001.0092.jpg
butter after all," said the little boy, who was not at all
satisfied with such summary injustice.
"Dat w'at make I say w'at I duz, honey. In dis worril, lots er fokes is gotter suffer fer udder fokes sins. Look like hit's mighty onwrong; but hit's des dat away. Tribbalashun seem like she's a waitin' roun' de cornder fer ter ketch one en all un us, honey." "That what make I say what I does, honey. In this world, lots of folks is got to suffer for other folks' sins. Look like it's mighty unwrong; but it's just that away. Tribulation seem like she's a waiting round the corner for to catch one and all of us, honey."
XVIII.
MR. RABBIT FINDS HIS MATCH AT LAST.
"Hit look like ter me dat I let on de udder night dat in dem days w'en de beastesses wuz santer'n 'roun' same like fokes, none un um wuz brash nuff fer ter ketch up wid Brer Rabbit," "It look like to me that I let on the other night that in them days when the beasts was sauntering around same like folks, none of them was brash enough for to catch up with Brer Rabbit," remarked Uncle Remus, reflectively.
"Yes," replied the little boy, "that's what you said."
"Well, den," "Well, then," continued the old man with unction, "dar's whar my 'membunce gin out, kaze Brer Rabbit did git kotched up wid, en hit cool 'im off like po'in' spring water on one er deze yer biggity fices." "there's where my rememberance give out, 'cause Brer Rabbit did get catched up with, and it cool him off like pouring spring water on one of these here biggity fices."
"How was that, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"One day w'en Brer Rabbit wuz gwine lippity-clippitin' down de road, he meet up wid ole Brer Tarrypin, en atter dey pass de time er day wid wunner nudder, Brer Rabbit, he 'low dat he wuz much 'blije ter Brer Tarrypin fer de han' he tuck in de rumpus dat day down at Miss Meadows's." "One day when Brer Rabbit was going lippity-clippitin' down the road, he meet up with old Brer Terrapin, and after they pass the time of day with one another, Brer Rabbit, he allow that he was much obliged to Brer Terrapin for the hand he took in the rumpus that day down at Miss Meadows's."
har1880.2007.001.0093.jpg
"When he dropped off of the water-shelf on the Fox's head," suggested the little boy.
"Dat's de same time, honey. Den Brer Rabbit 'low dat Brer Fox run mighty fas' dat day, but dat ef he'd er bin atter 'im stidder Brer Rabbit, he'd er kotch 'im. Brer Rabbit say he could er kotch 'im hisse'f but he didn't keer 'bout leavin' de ladies. Dey keep on talkin', dey did, twel bimeby dey gotter 'sputin' 'bout w'ich wuz de swif'es'. Brer Rabbit, he say he kin outrun Brer Tarrypin, en Brer Tarrypin, he des vow dat he kin outrun Brer Rabbit. Up en down dey had it, twel fus news you know Brer Tarrypin say he got a fifty-dollar bill in de chink er de chimbly at home, en dat bill done tole 'im dat he could beat Brer Rabbit in a fa'r race. Den Brer Rabbit say he got a fifty-dollar bill w'at say dat he kin leave Brer Tarrypin so fur behime, dat he could sow barley ez he went 'long en hit 'ud be ripe nuff fer ter cut by de time Brer Tarrypin pass dat way. "That's the same time, honey. Then Brer Rabbit allow that Brer Fox run mighty fast that day, but that if he'd have been after him instead of Brer Rabbit, he'd have catch him. Brer Rabbit say he could have catch him hisself but he didn't care about leaving the ladies. They keep on talking, they did, til by and by they got to disputing about which was the swiftest. Brer Rabbit, he say he can outrun Brer Terrapin, and Brer Terrapin he just vow that he can outrun Brer Rabbit. Up and down they had it, til first news you know Brer Terrapin say he got a fifty-dollar bill in the chink of the chimney at home, and that bill done told him that he could beat Brer Rabbit in a fair race. Then Brer Rabbit say he got a fifty-dollar bill what say that he can leave Brer Terrapin so far behind, that he could sow barley as he went along and it would be ripe enough for to cut by the time Brer Terrapin pass that way.
"Enny how dey make de bet en put up de money, en
ole Brer Tukky Buzzard, he wuz summonzd fer ter be de jedge, en de
stakeholder; en 'twan't long 'fo' all de 'rangements wuz made. De race
wuz a five-mile heat, en de groun' wuz medjud off, en at de een' er ev'ey
mile a pos' wuz stuck up. Brer Rabbit wuz ter run down de big road, en
Brer Tarrypin, he say he'd gallup thoo de woods. Fokes tole 'im he could
git long faster in de road, but ole Brer Tarrypin, he know wa't he doin'.
Miss Meadows en de gals en mos' all de nabers got win' er de fun, en w'en
de day wuz sot dey 'termin' fer ter be on han'. Brer Rabbit he train
hisse'f ev'ey day, en he skip over de groun'
"Any how they make the bet and put up the money, and old Brer Turkey
Buzzard, he was summoned for to be the judge, and the stakeholder; and it
wasn't long before all the arrangements was made. The race was a
five-mile heat, and the ground was measured off, and at the end of every
mile a post was stuck up. Brer Rabbit was to run down the big road, and
Brer Terrapin, he say he'd gallup through the woods. Folks told him he
could get long faster in the road, but old Brer Terrapin, he
know what he doing. Miss Meadows and the gals and most all the neighbors
got wind of the fun, and when the day was set they determined for to be
on hand. Brer Rabbit he train hisself every day, and he skip over the
ground
har1880.2007.001.0094.jpg
des ez gayly ez a June cricket. Ole Brer Tarrypin,
he lay low in de swamp. He had a wife en th'ee chilluns, ole Brer
Tarrypin did, en dey wuz all de ve'y spit en image er de ole man.
Ennybody w'at know one fum de udder gotter take a spy-glass, en den dey
er li'ble fer ter git fooled.
just as gaily as a June cricket. Old Brer Terrapin, he lay low in the
swamp. He had a wife and three children, old Brer Terrapin did, and they
was all the very spit and image of the old man. Anybody what
know one from the other got to take a spy-glass, and then they are liable
for to get fooled.
"Dat's de way marters stan' twel de day er de race, en on dat day, ole Brer Tarrypin, en his ole 'oman, en his th'ee chilluns, dey got up 'fo' sun-up, en went ter de place. De ole 'oman, she tuck 'er stan' nigh de fus' mile-pos', she did, en de chilluns nigh de udders, up ter de las', en dar ole Brer Tarrypin, he tuck his stan'. Bimeby, here come de fokes: Jedge Buzzard, he come, en Miss Meadows en de gals, dey come, en den yer come Brer Rabbit wid ribbins tied 'roun' his neck en streamin' fum his years. De fokes all went ter de udder een' er de track fer ter see how dey come out. W'en de time come Jedge Buzzard strut 'roun' en pull out his watch, en holler out: "That's the way matters stand til the day of the race, and on that day, old Brer Terrapin, and his old woman, and his three children, they got up before sun-up, and went to the place. The old woman, she took her stand nigh the first mile-post, she did, and the children nigh the others, up to the last, and there old Brer Terrapin, he took his stand. By and by, here come the folks: Judge Buzzard, he come, and Miss Meadows and the gals, they come, and then here come Brer Rabbit with ribbons tied around his neck and streaming from his ears. The folks all went to the other end of the track for to see how they come out. When the time come Judge Buzzard strut around and pull out his watch, and holler out:
"'Gents, is you ready?'
"Brer Rabbit, he say 'yes,' en ole Miss Tarrypin holler 'go' fum de aidge er de woods. Brer Rabbit, he lit out on de race, en ole Miss Tarrypin, she put out for home. Jedge Buzzard, he riz en skimmed 'long fer ter see dat de race wuz runned fa'r. W'en Brer Rabbit got ter de fus mile- pos' wunner de Tarrypin chilluns crawl out de woods, he did, en make fer de place. Brer Rabbit, he holler out: "Brer Rabbit, he say 'yes,' and old Miss Terrapin holler 'go' from the edge of the woods. Brer Rabbit, he lit out on the race, and old Miss Terrapin, she put out for home. Judge Buzzard, he rise and skimmed along for to see that the race was runned fair. When Brer Rabbit got to the first mile-post one of the Terrapin children crawl out the woods, he did, and make for the place. Brer Rabbit, he holler out:
"'Whar is you, Brer Tarrypin?' "'Where is you, Brer Terrapin?'
"'Yer I come a bulgin',' sez de Tarrypin, sezee. "'Here I come a bulgin',' says the Terrapin, says he.
"Brer Rabbit so glad he's ahead dat he put out
harder
"Brer Rabbit so glad he's ahead that he put out harder
har1880.2007.001.0095.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0096.jpg
[illustration - MISS MEADOWS EN DE GALS. ]
har1880.2007.001.0097.jpg
dan ever, en de Tarrypin, he make fer home. W'en he
come ter de nex' pos', nudder Tarrypin crawl out er de woods.
than ever, and the Terrapin, he make for home. When he come to the next
post, another Terrapin crawl out of the woods.
"'Whar is you, Brer Tarrypin?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Where is you, Brer Terrapin?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'Yer I come a bilin',' sez de Tarrypin, sezee. "'Here I come a billing,' says the Terrapin, says he.
"Brer Rabbit, he lit out, he did, en come ter nex' pos', en dar wuz de Tarrypin. Den he come ter nex', en dar wuz de Tarrypin. Den he had one mo' mile fer ter run, en he feel like he gittin' bellust. Bimeby, ole Brer Tarrypin look way off down de road en he see Jedge Buzzard sailin' 'long en he know hit's time fer 'im fer ter be up. So he scramble outen de woods, en roll 'cross de ditch, en shuffle thoo de crowd er folks en git ter de mile-pos' en crawl behime it. Bimeby, fus' news you know, yer come Brer Rabbit. He look 'roun' en he don't see Brer Tarrypin, en den he squall out: "Brer Rabbit, he lit out, he did, and come to next post, and there was the Terrapin. Then he come to next, and there was the Terrapin. Then he had one more mile for to run, and he feel like he getting ballast. By and by, old Brer Terrapin look way off down the road and he see Judge Buzzard sailing along and he know it's time for him for to be up. So he scramble out of the woods, and roll across the ditch, and shuffle through the crowd of folks and get to the mile-post and crawl behind it. By and by, first news you know, here come Brer Rabbit. He look around and he don't see Brer Terrapin and then he squall out:
"'Gimme de money, Brer Buzzard! Gimme de money!' "'Give me the money, Brer Buzzard! Give me the money!'
"Den Miss Meadows en de gals, dey holler and laff fit ter kill deyse'f, en ole Brer Tarrypin, he raise up fum behime de pos' en sez, sezee: "Then Miss Meadows and the gals, they holler and laugh fit to kill theyself, and old Brer Terrapin, he raise up from behind the post and says, says he:
"'Ef you'll gimme time fer
ter ketch my breff, gents en ladies, one en all, I speck I'll finger
dat money myse'f,' sezee, en sho nuff, Brer Tarrypin tie de pu's
'roun' his neck en skaddle [note * ]
It may be interesting to note here that
in all probability the word "skedaddle," about which there was some
controversy during the war, came from the Virginia negro's use of
"skaddle,' which is a corruption of "scatter." The matter, however, is
hardly worth referring to. [back]
har1880.2007.001.0098.jpg
"But, Uncle Remus," said the little boy, dolefully, "that was cheating."
"Co'se, honey. De beastesses 'gun ter cheat, en den fokes tuck it up, en hit keep on spreadin'. Hit mighty ketchin', en you mine yo' eye, honey, dat somebody don't cheat you 'fo' yo' ha'r git gray ez de ole nigger's." "Course, honey. The beasts begun to cheat, and then folks took it up, and it keep on spreading. It mighty catching, and you mind your eye, honey, that somebody don't cheat you before your hair get gray as the old nigger's."
XIX.
THE FATE OF MR. JACK SPARROW.
"You'll tromple on dat bark twel hit won't be fitten fer ter fling 'way, let 'lone make hoss-collars out'n," "You'll trample on that bark til it won't be fitting for to fling away, let alone make horse-collars out of," said Uncle Remus, as the little boy came running into his cabin out of the rain. All over the floor long strips of "wahoo" bark were spread, and these the old man was weaving into horse-collars.
"I'll sit down, Uncle Remus," said the little boy.
"Well, den, you better, honey," "Well, then, you better, honey," responded the old man, "kaze I 'spizes fer ter have my wahoo trompled on. Ef 'twuz shucks, now, hit mout be diffunt, but I'm a gittin' too ole fer ter be projickin' longer shuck collars." "'cause I spies for to have my wahoo trampled on. If it was shucks, now, it might be different, but I'm a getting too old for to be projickin' along with shuck collars."
For a few minutes the old man went on with his work, but with a solemn air
altogether unusual. Once or twice he sighed deeply, and the sighs ended in a
prolonged groan, that seemed to the little boy to be the result of the most
unspeakable mental agony. He knew by experlence that he had done something which
failed to meet the approval
har1880.2007.001.0099.jpg
of Uncle Remus, and he tried to
remember what it was, so as to frame an excuse; but his memory failed him. He
could think of nothing he had done calculated to stir Uncle Remus's grief. He was
not exactly seized with remorse, but he was very uneasy. Presently Uncle Remus
looked at him in a sad and hopeless way, and asked:
"W'at dat long rigmarole you bin tellin' Miss Sally 'bout yo' little brer dis mawnin'?" "What that long rigamarole you been telling Miss Sally about your little brother this morning?"
"Which, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy, blushing guiltily.
"Dat des w'at I'm a axin' un you now. I hear Miss Sally say she's a gwineter stripe his jacket, en den I knowed you bin tellin' on 'im." "That just what I'm a asking of you now. I hear Miss Sally say she's a going to stripe his jacket, and then I knowed you been telling on him."
"Well, Uncle Remus, he was pulling up your onions, and then he went and flung a rock at me," said the child, plaintively.
"Lemme tell you dis," "Let me tell you this," said the old man, laying down the section of horse-collar he had been plaiting, and looking hard at the little boy— "lemme tell you dis—der ain't no way fer ter make tattlers en tail-b'arers turn out good. No, dey ain't. I bin mixin' up wid fokes now gwine on eighty year, en I ain't seed no tattler come ter no good een'. Dat I ain't. En ef ole man M'thoozlum wuz livin' clean twel yit, he'd up'n tell you de same. Sho ez youer settin' dar. You 'member w'at 'come er de bird w'at went tattlin' 'roun' 'bout Brer Rabbit?" "let me tell you this—there ain't no way for to make tattlers and tail-bearers turn out good. No, they ain't. I been mixing up with folks now going on eighty year, and I ain't seen no tattler come to no good end. That I ain't. And if old man Methuselah was living clean til yet, he'd up and tell you the same. Sure as you're setting there. You remember what 'come of the bird what went tattling around about Brer Rabbit?"
The little boy didn't remember, but he was very anxious to know; and he also wanted to know what kind of a bird it was that so disgraced itself.
har1880.2007.001.0100.jpg
"Hit wuz wunner deze yer uppity little Jack Sparrers, I speck," "It was one of these here uppity little Jack Sparrows, I expect," said the old man; "dey wuz allers bodder'n' longer udder fokes's bizness, en dey keeps at it down ter dis day—peckin' yer, and pickin' dar, en scratchin' out yander. One day, atter he bin fool by ole Brer Tarrypin, Brer Rabbit wuz settin' down in de woods studdyin' how he wuz gwineter git even. He feel mighty lonesome, en he feel mighty mad, Brer Rabbit did. Tain't put down in de tale, but I speck he cusst en r'ar'd 'roun' considerbul. Leas'ways, he wuz settin' out dar by hisse'f, en dar he sot, en study en study, twel bimeby he jump up en holler out: "they was always bothering along with other folks's business, and they keeps at it down to this day—pecking here, and picking there, and scratching out yonder. One day, after he been fool by old Brer Terrapin, Brer Rabbit was setting down in the woods studying how he was going to get even. He feel mighty lonesome, and he feel mighty mad, Brer Rabbit did. It ain't put down in the tale, but I expect he cursed and roared around considerable. Leastways, he was setting out there by hisself, and there he sat, and study and study, til by and by he jump up and holler out:
"'Well, doggone my cats ef I can't gallop 'roun' ole Brer Fox, en I'm gwineter do it. I'll show Miss Meadows en de gals dat I'm de boss er Brer Fox,' sezee. "'Well, doggone my cats if I can't gallop around old Brer Fox, and I'm going to do it. I'll show Miss Meadows and the gals that I'm the boss of Brer Fox,' says he.
"Jack Sparrer up in de tree, he hear Brer Rabbit, he did, en he sing out: "Jack Sparrow up in the tree, he hear Brer Rabbit, he did, and he sing out:
"'I'm gwine tell Brer Fox! I'm gwine tell Brer Fox! Chick-a-biddy-win'-a-blowin'-acuns-fallin'! I'm gwine tell Brer Fox!'" "'I'm going tell Brer Fox! I'm going tell Brer Fox! Chick-a-biddy-wind-a-blowing-acorns-falling! I'm going tell Brer Fox!'"
Uncle Remus accompanied the speech of the bird with a peculiar whistling sound in his throat, that was a marvelous imitation of a sparrow's chirp, and the little boy clapped his hands with delight, and insisted on a repetition.
"Dis kinder tarrify Brer Rabbit, en he skasely know w'at he gwine do; but bimeby he study ter hisse'f dat de man w'at see Brer Fox fus wuz boun' ter have de inturn, en den he go hoppin' off to'rds home. He didn't got fur w'en who should he meet but Brer Fox, en den Brer Rabbit, he open up: "This kind of terrify Brer Rabbit, and he scarcely know what he going do; but by and by he study to hisself that the man what see Brer Fox first was bound to have the inturn, and then he go hopping off towards home. He didn't got far when who should he meet but Brer Fox, and then Brer Rabbit, he open up:
har1880.2007.001.0101.jpg
"'W'at dis twix' you en me, Brer Fox?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'I hear tell you gwine ter sen' me ter 'struckshun, en nab my fambly, en 'stroy my shanty,' sezee. "'What this betwixt you and me, Brer Fox?' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'I hear tell you going to send me to destruction and nab my family, and destroy my shanty,' says he.
"Den Brer Fox he git mighty mad. "Then Brer Fox he get mighty mad.
"'Who bin tellin' you all dis?' sezee. "'Who been telling you all this?' says he.
"Brer Rabbit make like he didn't want ter tell, but Brer Fox he 'sist en 'sist, twel at las' Brer Rabbit he up en tell Brer Fox dat he hear Jack Sparrer say all dis. "Brer Rabbit make like he didn't want to tell, but Brer Fox he insist and insist, til at last Brer Rabbit he up and tell Brer Fox that he hear Jack Sparrow say all this.
"'Co'se,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'w'en Brer Jack Sparrow tell me dat I flew up, I did, en I use some langwidge w'ich I'm mighty glad dey wern't no ladies 'roun' nowhars so dey could hear me go on,' sezee. "'Course,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'when Brer Jack Sparrer tell me that I flew up, I did, and I use some language which I'm mighty glad they weren't no ladies around nowheres so they could hear me go on,' says he.
"Brer Fox he sorter gap, he did, en say he speck he better be sa'nter'n on. But, bless yo' soul, honey, Brer Fox ain't sa'nter far, 'fo' Jack Sparrer flipp down on a 'simmon-bush by de side er de road, en holler out: "Brer Fox he sort of gape, he did, and say he expect he better be sauntering on. But, bless your soul, honey, Brer Fox ain't saunter far, before Jack Sparrow flip down on a persimmon-bush by the side of the road, and holler out:
"'Brer Fox! Oh, Brer Fox!—Brer Fox!'
"Brer Fox he des sorter canter 'long, he did, en make like he don't hear 'im. Den Jack Sparrer up'n sing out agin: "Brer Fox he just sort of canter along, he did, and make like he don't hear him. Then Jack Sparrow up and sing out again:
"'Brer Fox! Oh, Brer Fox! Hole on, Brer Fox! I got some news fer you. Wait, Brer Fox! Hit'll 'stonish you.' "'Brer Fox! Oh, Brer Fox! Hold on, Brer Fox! I got some news for you. Wait, Brer Fox! It'll astonish you.'
"Brer Fox he make like he don't see Jack Sparrer,
ner needer do he hear 'im, but bimeby he lay down by de road, en sorter
stretch hisse'f like he fixin' fer ter nap. De tattlin' Jack Sparrer he
flew'd 'long, en keep on callin' Brer Fox, but Brer Fox, he ain't sayin'
nuthin'. Den little Jack Sparrer, he hop down on de groun' en flutter
'roun'
Brer Fox he make like he don't see Jack Sparrow, nor niether do he hear
him, but by and by he lay down by the road, and sort of stretch hisself
like he fixing for to nap. The tattling Jack Sparrow he flewed
along, and keep on calling Brer Fox, but Brer Fox, he ain't saying
nothing. Then little Jack Sparrow, he hop down on the ground and flutter
around
har1880.2007.001.0102.jpg
'mongst de trash. Dis sorter 'track Brer Fox
'tenshun, en he look at de tattlin' bird, en de bird he keep on callin':
amongst the trash. This sort of attract Brer Fox attention, and he look
at the tattling bird, and the bird he keep on calling:
"'I got sump'n fer ter tell you, Brer Fox.' "'I got something for to tell you, Brer Fox.'
"'Git on my tail, little Jack Sparrer,' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'kaze I'm de'f in one year, en I can't hear out'n de udder. Git on my tail,' sezee. "'Get on my tail, little Jack Sparrow,' says Brer Fox, says he, ''cause I'm deaf in one ear, and I can't hear out of the other. Get on my tail,' says he.
"Den de little bird he up'n hop on Brer Fox's tail. "Then the little bird he up and hop on Brer Fox's tail.
"'Git on my back, little Jack Sparrer, kaze I'm de'f in one year en I can't hear out'n de udder.' "'Get on my back, little Jack Sparrow, 'cause I'm deaf in one ear and I can't hear out of the other.'
"Den de little bird hop on his back. "Then the little bird hop on his back.
"'Hop on my head, little Jack Sparrer, kaze I'm de'f in bofe years.' "'Hop on my head, little Jack Sparrow, 'cause I'm deaf in both ears.'
"Up hop de little bird. "Up hop the little bird.
"'Hop on my toof, little Jack Sparrer, kaze I'm de'f in one year en I can't hear out'n de udder.' "'Hop on my tooth, little Jack Sparrow, 'cause I'm deaf in one ear and I can't hear out of the other.'
"De tattlin' little bird hop on Brer Fox's toof, en den—" "The tattling little bird hop on Brer Fox's tooth, and then—"
Here Uncle Remus paused, opened wide his mouth and closed it again in a way that told the whole story.
"Did the Fox eat the bird all—all—up?" asked the little boy.
"Jedge B'ar come 'long nex' day,"
"Judge Bear come along next day,"
replied Uncle Remus,
har1880.2007.001.0103.jpg
"en he fine some fedders, en fum dat word went
roun' dat ole man Squinch Owl done kotch nudder watziz-name."
"and he find some feathers, and from that word went round that old man
Squinch Owl done catch another what's-his-name."
XX.
HOW MR. RABBIT SAVED HIS MEAT.
"One time," said Uncle Remus, whetting his knife slowly and thoughtfully on the palm of his hand, and gazing reflectively in the fire—"one time Brer Wolf—"
"Why, Uncle Remus!" the little boy broke in, "I thought you said the Rabbit scalded the Wolf to death a long time ago."
The old man was fairly caught and he knew it; but this made little difference to him. A frown gathered on his usually serene brow as he turned his gaze upon the child—a frown in which both scorn and indignation were visible. Then all at once he seemed to regain control of himself. The frown was chased away by a look of Christian resignation.
"Dar now! W'at I tell you?"
"There now! What I tell you?"
he exclaimed as if addressing a witness concealed under the bed.
"Ain't I done tole you so? Bless grashus! ef
chilluns ain't gittin' so dey knows mo'n ole fokes, en dey'll spute
longer you en spute longer you, ceppin der ma call um, w'ich I speck
twon't be long 'fo' she will, en den I'll set yere by de chimbly-cornder
en git some peace er mine. W'en ole Miss wuz livin',"
"Ain't I done told you so? Bless gracious! if children ain't getting so
they knows more than old folks, and they'll dispute along with you and
dispute longer you, excepting their ma call them, which I expect it won't
be long before she will, and then I'll set here by the chimney-corner and
get some peace of mind. When old Miss was living,"
continued
har1880.2007.001.0104.jpg
the old man, still addressing some imaginary person,
"hit 'uz mo'n enny her chilluns 'ud dast ter do ter
come 'sputin' longer me, en Mars John'll tell you de same enny day you ax
'im."
"it was more than any her children would dare to do to come disputing
along with me, and Master John'll tell you the same any day you ask
him."
"Well, Uncle Remus, you know you said the Rabbit poured hot water on the Wolf and killed him," said the little boy.
The old man pretended not to hear. He was engaged in searching among some scraps
of leather under his chair,
har1880.2007.001.0105.jpg
and kept on talking to the
imaginary person. Finally, he found and drew forth a nicely plaited whip-thong
with a red snapper all waxed and knotted.
"I wuz fixin' up a w'ip fer a little chap," "I was fixing up a whip for a little chap," he continued, with a sigh, "but, bless grashus! 'fo' I kin git'er done, de little chap done grow'd up twel he know mo'n I duz." "but, bless gracious! before I can get her done, the little chap done growed up til he know more than I does."
The child's eyes filled with tears and his lips began to quiver, but he said nothing; whereupon Uncle Remus immediately melted.
"I 'clar' to goodness," "I declare to goodness," he said, reaching out and taking the little boy tenderly by the hand, "ef you ain't de ve'y spit en image er ole Miss w'en I brung 'er de las' news er de war. Hit's des like skeerin' up a ghos' w'at you ain't fear'd un." "if you ain't the very spit and image of old Miss when I brung her the last news of the war. It's just like scaring up a ghost what you ain't feared of."
Then there was a pause, the old man patting the little child's hand caressingly.
"You ain't mad, is you, honey?" Uncle Remus asked finally, "kaze ef you is, I'm gwine out yere en butt my head 'gin de do' jam'." "'cause if you is, I'm going out here and butt my head against the door jamb."
But the little boy wasn't mad. Uncle Remus had conquered him and he had conquered Uncle Remus in pretty much the same way before. But it was some time before Uncle Remus would go on with the story. He had to be coaxed. At last, however, he settled himself back in the chair and began:
"Co'se, honey, hit mout er bin ole Brer Wolf, er
hit mout er bin er n'er Brer Wolf; it mout er bin 'fo' he got kotch up
wid, er it mout er bin atterwards. Ez de tale wer gun to me des dat away
I gin it unter you. One time Brer Wolf
"Course, honey, it might have been old Brer Wolf, or it might have been
another Brer Wolf; it might of been before he got catch up with, or it
might of been afterwards. As the tale were begun to me just that away I
begin it unto you. One time Brer Wolf
har1880.2007.001.0106.jpg
wuz comin' 'long home fum a fishin' frolic. He
s'anter 'long de road, he did, wid his string er fish 'cross his
shoulder, wen fus news you know ole Miss Pa'tridge, she hop outer de
bushes en flutter 'long right at Brer Wolf nose. Brer Wolf he say ter
hisse'f dat ole Miss Pa'tridge tryin' fer ter toll 'im 'way fum her nes',
en wid dat he lay his fish down en put out inter de bushes whar ole Miss
Pa'tridge come fum, en 'bout dat time Brer Rabbit, he happen 'long. Dar
wuz de fishes, en dar wuz Brer Rabbit, en w'en dat de case w'at you speck
a sorter innerpen'ent man like Brer Rabbit gwine do? I kin tell you dis,
dat dem fishes ain't stay whar Brer Wolf put um at, en w'en Brer Wolf
come back dey wuz gone.
was coming along home from a fishing frolic. He saunter along the road,
he did, with his string of fish across his shoulder, when first news you
know old Miss Partridge, she hop out of the bushes and flutter along
right at Brer Wolf nose. Brer Wolf he say to hisself that old Miss
Partridge trying for to toll him away from her nest, and with that he lay
his fish down and put out into the bushes where old Miss Partridge come
from, and about that time Brer Rabbit, he happen along. There was the
fishes, and there was Brer Rabbit, and when that the case what you expect
a sort of independent man like Brer Rabbit going do? I can tell you this,
that them fishes ain't stay where Brer Wolf put them at, and when Brer
Wolf come back they was gone.
"Brer Wolf, he sot down en scratch his head, he did, en study en study, en den hit sorter rush inter his mine dat Brer Rabbit bin 'long dar, en den Brer Wolf, he put out fer Brer Rabbit house, en w'en he git dar he hail 'im. Brer Rabbit, he dunno nuthin' tall 'bout no fishes. Brer Wolf he up'n say he bleedzd ter b'leeve Brer Rabbit got dem fishes. Brer Rabbit 'ny it up en down, but Brer Wolf stan' too it dat Brer Rabbit got dem fishes. Brer Rabbit, he say dat if Brer Wolf b'leeve he got de fishes, den he give Brer Wolf lief fer ter kill de bes' cow he got. Brer Wolf, he tuck Brer Rabbit at his word, en go off ter de pastur' en drive up de cattle en kill Brer Rabbit bes' cow. "Brer Wolf, he sat down and scratch his head, he did, and study and study, and then it sort of rush into his mind that Brer Rabbit been along there, and then Brer Wolf, he put out for Brer Rabbit house, and when he get there he hail him. Brer Rabbit, he don't know nothing at all about no fishes. Brer Wolf he up and say he bleedzd to believe Brer Rabbit got them fishes. Brer Rabbit deny it up and down, but Brer Wolf stand to it that Brer Rabbit got them fishes. Brer Rabbit, he say that if Brer Wolf believe he got the fishes, then he give Brer Wolf lief for to kill the best cow he got. Brer Wolf, he took Brer Rabbit at his word, and go off to the pasture and drive up the cattle and kill Brer Rabbit best cow.
"Brer Rabbit, he hate mighty bad fer ter lose his
cow, but he lay his plans, en he tell his chilluns dat he gwineter have
dat beef yit. Brer Wolf, he bin tuck up by de
patter-
"Brer Rabbit, he hate mighty bad for to lose his cow, but he lay his
plans, and he tell his children that he going to have that beef yet. Brer
Wolf, he been took up by the patrollers
har1880.2007.001.0107.jpg
rollers 'fo' now, en he mighty skeerd un um, en fus
news you know, yer come Brer Rabbit hollerin' en tellin' Brer Wolf dat de
patter-rollers comin'.
before now, and he mighty scared of them, and first news you know, here
come Brer Rabbit hollering and telling Brer Wolf that the patrollers
coming.
"'You run en hide, Brer Wolf,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en I'll stay yer en take keer er de cow twel you gits back,' sezee. "'You run and hide, Brer Wolf,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and I'll stay here and take care of the cow til you gets back,' says he.
"Soon's Brer Wolf hear talk er de patter-rollers, he scramble off inter de underbresh like he bin shot out'n a gun. En he want mo'n gone 'fo' Brer Rabbit, he whirl in en skunt de cow en salt de hide down, en den he tuck'n cut up de kyarkiss en stow it 'way in de smoke-'ouse, en den he tuck'n stick de een' er de cow-tail in de groun'. Atter he gone en done all dis, den Brer Rabbit he squall out fer Brer Wolf: "Soon as Brer Wolf hear talk of the patrollers, he scramble off into the underbrush like he been shot out of a gun. And he wasn't more than gone before Brer Rabbit, he whirl in and skinned the cow and salt the hide down, and then he took and cut up the carcass and stow it away in the smoke-house, and then he took and stick the end of the cow-tail in the ground. After he gone and done all this, then Brer Rabbit he squall out for Brer Wolf:
"'Run yer, Brer Wolf! Run yer! Yo' cow gwine in de groun'! Run yer!' "'Run here, Brer Wolf! Run here! Your cow going in the ground! Run here!'
"W'en ole Brer Wolf got dar, w'ich he come er scootin', dar wuz Brer Rabbit hol'in' on ter de cow-tail, fer ter keep it fum gwine in de groun'. Brer Wolf, he kotch holt, en dey 'gin a pull er two en up come de tail. Den Brer Rabbit, he wink his off eye en say, sezee: "When old Brer Wolf got there, which he come a'scooting, there was Brer Rabbit holding on to the cow-tail, for to keep it from going in the ground. Brer Wolf, he catch hold, and they begin a pull or two and up come the tail. Then Brer Rabbit, he wink his off eye and say, says he:
"'Dar! de tail done pull out en de cow gone,' sezee. "'There! the tail done pull out and the cow gone,' says he.
"But Brer Wolf he wer'n't de man fer ter give it up dat away, en he got 'im a spade, en a pick-axe, en a shovel, en he dig en dig fer dat cow twel diggin' wuz pas' all endu'unce, en ole Brer Rabbit he sot up dar in his front po'ch en smoke his seegyar. Eve'y time ole Brer Wolf stuck de pick-axe in de clay, Brer Rabbit, he giggle ter his chilluns: "But Brer Wolf he weren't the man for to give it up that away, and he got him a spade, and a pick-axe, and a shovel, and he dig and dig for that cow til digging was past all endurance, and old Brer Rabbit he sat up there in his front porch and smoke his cigar. Every time old Brer Wolf stuck the pick-axe in the clay, Brer Rabbit, he giggle to his children:
har1880.2007.001.0108.jpg
"'He diggy, diggy, diggy, but no meat dar! He diggy, diggy, diggy, but no meat dar!' "'He diggy, diggy, diggy, but no meat there! He diggy, diggy, diggy, but no meat there!'
"Kaze all de time de cow wuz layin' pile up in his smoke-'ouse, en him en his chilluns wuz eatin' fried beef en inguns eve'y time dey mouf water. "'Cause all the time the cow was laying pile up in his smoke-house, and him and his children was eating fried beef and onions every time they mouth water.
"Now den, honey, you take dis yer w'ip," "Now then, honey, you take this here whip," continued the old man, twining the leather thong around the little boy's neck, "en scamper up ter de big 'ouse en tell Miss Sally fer ter gin you some un it de nex' time she fine yo' tracks in de sugar-bairl." "and scamper up to the big house and tell Miss Sally for to give you some of it the next time she find your tracks in the sugar-barrel."
XXI.
MR. RABBIT MEETS HIS MATCH AGAIN.
"Dere wuz nudder man dat sorter play it sharp on Brer Rabbit," "There was another man that sort of play it sharp on Brer Rabbit," said Uncle Remus, as, by some mysterious process, he twisted a hog's bristle into the end of a piece of thread—an operation which the little boy watched with great interest. "In dem days," "In them days," continued the old man, "de beastesses kyar'd on marters same ez fokes. Dey went inter fahmin', en I speck ef de troof wuz ter come out, dey kep' sto', en had der camp-meetin' times en der bobbycues w'en de wedder wuz 'greeble." "the beasts carried on matters same as folks. They went into farming, and I expect if the truth was to come out, they kep' sto', and had their camp-meeting times and their barbecues when the weather was agreeble."
Uncle Remus evidently thought that the little boy wouldn't like to hear of any further discomfiture of Brer Rabbit, who had come to be a sort of hero, and he was not mistaken.
har1880.2007.001.0109.jpg [illustration - BRER RABBIT MEETS HIS MATCH AGAIN. ]
har1880.2007.001.0110.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0111.jpg
"I thought the Terrapin was the only one that fooled the Rabbit," said the little boy, dismally.
"Hit's des like I tell you, honey. Dey ain't no smart man, 'cep' w'at dey's a smarter. Ef ole Brer Rabbit hadn't er got kotch up wid, de nabers 'ud er tuck 'im for a h'ant, en in dem times dey bu'nt witches 'fo' you could squinch yo' eyeballs. Dey did dat." "It's just like I tell you, honey. They ain't no smart man, except what they's a smarter. If old Brer Rabbit hadn't have got catch up with, the neighbors would have took him for a haunt, and in them times they burnt witches before you could squinch your eyeballs. They did that."
"Who fooled the Rabbit this time?" the little boy asked.
When Uncle Remus had the bristle "sot" in the thread, he proceeded with the story:
"One time Brer Rabbit en ole Brer Buzzard 'cluded dey'd sorter go snacks, en crap tergedder. Hit wuz a mighty good year, en de truck tu'n out monstus well, but bimeby, w'en de time come fer dividjun, hit come ter light dat ole Brer Buzzard ain't got nuthin'. De crap wuz all gone, en dey want nuthin' dar fer ter show fer it. Brer Rabbit, he make like he in a wuss fix'n Brer Buzzard, en he mope 'roun', he did, like he fear'd dey gwineter sell 'im out. "One time Brer Rabbit and old Brer Buzzard concluded they'd sort of go snacks, and crop together. It was a mighty good year, and the truck turn out monstrous well, but by and by, when the time come for dividing, it come to light that old Brer Buzzard ain't got nothing. The crop was all gone, and they wasn't nothing there for to show for it. Brer Rabbit, he make like he in a worse fix than Brer Buzzard, and he mope around, he did, like he feared they going to sell him out.
"Brer Buzzard, he ain't sayin' nuthin', but he keep up a monstus thinkin', en one day he come 'long en holler en tell Brer Rabbit dat he done fine rich gole-mine des 'cross de river. "Brer Buzzard, he ain't saying nothing, but he keep up a monstrous thinking, and one day he come along and holler and tell Brer Rabbit that he done find rich gold-mine just across the river.
"'You come en go 'longer me, Brer Rabbit,' sez Brer Tukky Buzzard, sezee. 'I'll scratch en you kin grabble, en 'tween de two un us we'll make short wuk er dat gole-mine,' sezee. "'You come and go along with me, Brer Rabbit,' says Brer Turkey Buzzard, says he. 'I'll scratch and you can grabble, and between the two of us we'll make short work of that gold-mine,' says he.
"Brer Rabbit, he wuz high up for de job, but he
study en study, he did, how he gwineter git 'cross de water, kaze
"Brer Rabbit, he was high up for the job, but he study and study, he
did, how he going to get across the water, 'cause
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ev'y time he git his foot wet all de fambly kotch
cole. Den he up'n ax Brer Buzzard how he gwine do, en Brer Buzzard he
up'n say dat he kyar Brer Rabbit 'cross, en wid dat ole Brer Buzzard, he
squat down, he did, en spread his wings, en Brer Rabbit, he mounted, en
up dey riz."
every time he get his foot wet all the family catch cold. Then he up
and ask Brer Buzzard how he going do, and Brer Buzzard he up
and say that he carry Brer Rabbit across, and with that old Brer Buzzard,
he squat down, he did, and spread his wings, and Brer Rabbit, he mounted,
and up they rose."
There was a pause.
"What did the Buzzard do then?" asked the little boy.
"Dey riz," "They rose," continued Uncle Remus, "en w'en dey lit, dey lit in de top er de highest sorter pine, en de pine w'at dey lit in wuz growin' on er ilun, en de ilun wuz in de middle er de river, wid de deep water runnin' all 'roun'. Dey ain't mo'n lit 'fo' Brer Rabbit, he know w'ich way de win' 'uz blowin', en by de time ole Brer Buzzard got hisse'f ballunce on a lim', Brer Rabbit, he up'n say, sezee: "and when they lit, they lit in the top of the highest sort of pine, and the pine what they lit in was growing on a island, and the island was in the middle of the river, with the deep water running all around. They ain't more than lit before Brer Rabbit, he know which way the wind was blowing, and by the time old Brer Buzzard got hisself balance on a limb, Brer Rabbit, he up and say, says he:
"'W'iles we er res'n here, Brer Buzzard, en bein's you bin so good, I got sump'n fer ter tell you,' sezee. 'I got a gole-mine er my own, one w'at I make myse'f, en I speck we better go back ter mine 'fo' we bodder 'longer yone,' sezee. "'While we are resting here, Brer Buzzard, and being as you been so good, I got something for to tell you,' says he. 'I got a gold-mine of my own, one what I make myself, and I expect we better go back to mine before we bother along with yours,' says he.
"Den ole Brer Buzzard, he laff, he did, twel he shake, en Brer Rabbit, he sing out: "Then old Brer Buzzard, he laugh, he did, til he shake, and Brer Rabbit, he sing out:
"'Hole on, Brer Buzzard! Don't flop yo' wings w'en you laff, kaze den ef you duz, sump'n 'ill drap fum up yer, en my gole-mine won't do you no good, en needer will yone do me no good.' "'Hold on, Brer Buzzard! Don't flap your wings when you laugh, 'cause then if you does, something will drop from up here, and my gold-mine won't do you no good, and neither will yours do me no good.'
"But 'fo' dey got down fum dar, Brer Rabbit done tole all 'bout de crap, en he hatter promus fer ter 'vide fa'r en squar. So Brer Buzzard, he kyar 'im back, en Brer Rabbit he walk weak in de knees a mont' atterwuds." "But before they got down from there, Brer Rabbit done told all about the crop, and he had to promise for to divide fair and square. So Brer Buzzard, he carry him back, and Brer Rabbit he walk weak in the knees a month afterwards."
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XXII.
A STORY ABOUT THE LITTLE RABBITS.
"Fine um whar you will en w'en you may," "Find them where you will and when you may," remarked Uncle Remus with emphasis, "good chilluns allers gits tuck keer on. Dar wuz Brer Rabbit's chilluns; dey minded der daddy en mammy fum day's een' ter day's een'. W'en ole man Rabbit say 'scoot,' dey scooted, en w'en ole Miss Rabbit say 'scat,' dey scatted. Dey did dat. En dey kep der cloze clean, en dey ain't had no smut on der nose nudder." "good children always gets took care on. There was Brer Rabbit's children; they minded their daddy and mammy from day's end to day's end. When old man Rabbit say 'scoot,' they scooted, and when old Miss Rabbit say 'scat,' they scatted. They did that. And they kept their clothes clean, and they ain't had no smut on their nose neither." Involuntarily the hand of the little boy went up to his face, and he scrubbed the end of his nose with his coat-sleeve.
"Dey wuz good chilluns," "They was good children," continued the old man, heartily, "en ef dey hadn't er bin, der wuz one time w'en dey wouldn't er bin no little rabbits—na'er one. Dat's w'at." "and if they hadn't have been, there was one time when they wouldn't have been no little rabbits—nary one. That's what."
"What time was that, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked.
"De time w'en Brer Fox drapt in at Brer Rabbit
house, en didn't foun' nobody dar ceppin' de little Rabbits. Ole Brer
Rabbit, he wuz off some'rs raiding on a collard patch, en ole Miss Rabbit
she wuz tendin' on a quiltin' in de naberhood, en wiles de little Rabbits
wuz playin' hidin'-switch, in drapt Brer Fox. De little Rabbits wuz so
fat dat dey fa'rly make his mouf water, but he 'member 'bout Brer Wolf,
en he skeered fer ter gobble um up ceppin' he got some skuse. De little
Rabbits, dey mighty skittish, en dey
"The time when Brer Fox dropped in at Brer Rabbit house, and didn't
found nobody there excepting the little Rabbits. Old Brer Rabbit, he was
off somewheres raiding on a collard patch, and old Miss Rabbit she was
tending on a quilting in the neighborhood and while the little Rabbits
was playing hiding-switch, in dropped Brer Fox. The little
Rabbits was so fat that they fairly make his mouth water, but he remember
about Brer Wolf, and he scared for to gobble them up excepting he got
some excuse. The little Rabbits, they mighty skittish, and they
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sorter huddle deyse'f up tergedder en watch Brer
Fox motions. Brer Fox, he sot dar en study w'at sorter skuse he gwineter
make up. Bimeby he see a great big stalk er sugar-cane stan'in' up in de
cornder, en he cle'r up his th'oat en talk biggity:
sort of huddle theyself up together and watch Brer Fox motions. Brer
Fox, he sat there and study what sort of excuse he going to make up. By
and by he see a great big stalk of sugar-cane standing up in the corner,
and he clear up his throat and talk biggity:
"'Yer! you young Rabs dar, sail 'roun' yer en broke me a piece er dat sweetnin'-tree,' sezee, en den he koff. "'Here! you young Rabs there, sail around here and broke me a piece of that sweetning-tree,' says he, and then he cough.
"De little Rabbits, dey got out de sugar-cane, dey did, en dey rastle wid it, en sweat over it, but twan't no use. Dey couldn't broke it. Brer Fox, he make like he ain't watchin', but he keep on holler'n: "The little Rabbits, they got out the sugar-cane, they did, and they wrestle with it, and sweat over it, but it wasn't no use. They couldn't broke it. Brer Fox, he make like he ain't watching, but he keep on hollering:
"'Hurry up dar, Rabs! I'm a waitin' on you.' "'Hurry up there, Rabs! I'm a waiting on you.'
"En de little Rabbits, dey hustle 'roun' en rastle wid it, but dey couldn't broke it. Bimeby dey hear little bird singin' on top er de house, en de song wa't de little bird sing wuz dish yer: "And the little Rabbits, they hustle around and wrestle with it, but they couldn't broke it. By and by they hear little bird singing on top of the house, and the song what the little bird sing was this here:
"Den de little Rabbits, dey git mighty glad, en dey gnyawed de cane mos' 'fo' ole Brer Fox could git his legs oncrosst, en w'en dey kyard 'im de cane, Brer Fox, he sot dar en study how he gwineter make some mo' skuse fer nabbin' un um, en bimeby he git up en git down de sifter w'at wuz hangin' on de wall, en holler out: "Then the little Rabbits, they get mighty glad, and they gnawed the cane almost before old Brer Fox could get his legs uncrossed, and when they carried him the cane, Brer Fox, he sat there and study how he going to make some more excuse for nabbing of them, and by and by he get up and get down the sifter what was hanging on the wall, and holler out:
"'Come yer, Rabs! Take dish yer sifter, en run down't de spring en fetch me some fresh water.' "'Come here, Rabs! Take this here sifter, and run down to the spring and fetch me some fresh water.'
har1880.2007.001.0115.jpg
"De little Rabbits, dey run down't de spring, en try ter dip up de water wid de sifter, but co'se hit all run out, en hit keep on runnin' out, twell bimeby de little Rabbits sot down en 'gun ter cry. Den de little bird settin' up in de tree he begin fer ter sing, en dish yer's de song wa't he sing: "The little Rabbits, they run down to the spring, and try to dip up the water with the sifter, but course it all run out, and it keep on running out, til by and by the little Rabbits sat down and begun to cry. Then the little bird setting up in the tree he begin for to sing, and this here's the song what he sing:
"Up dey jump, de little Rabbits did, en dey fix de sifter so 'twon't leak, en den dey kyar de water ter ole Brer Fox. Den Brer Fox he git mighty mad, en p'int out a great big stick er wood, en tell de little Rabbits fer ter put dat on de fier. De little chaps dey got 'roun' de wood, dey did, en dey lif' at it so hard twel dey could see der own sins, but de wood ain't budge. Den dey hear de little bird singin', en dish yer's de song w'at he sing: "Up they jump, the little Rabbits did, and they fix the sifter so it won't leak, and then they carry the water to old Brer Fox. Then Brer Fox he get mighty mad, and point out a great big stick of wood, and tell the little Rabbits for to put that on the fire. The little chaps they got around the wood, they did, and they lift at it so hard til they could see their own sins, but the wood ain't budge. Then they hear the little bird singing, and this here's the song what he sing:
"En des 'bout de time dey got de wood on de fier, der daddy, he come skippin' in, en de little bird, he flew'd away. Brer Fox, he seed his game wuz up, en 'twan't long 'fo' he make his skuse en start fer ter go. "And just about the time they got the wood on the fire, their daddy, he come skipping in, and the little bird, he flewed away. Brer Fox, he seed his game was up, and it wasn't long before he make his excuse and start for to go.
"'You better stay en take a snack wid me, Brer Fox,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. 'Sence Brer Wolf done quit comin' en settin' up wid me, I gittin' so I feels right lonesome dese long nights,' sezee. "'You better stay and take a snack with me, Brer Fox,' says Brer Rabbit, says he. 'Since Brer Wolf done quit coming and setting up with me, I getting so I feels right lonesome these long nights,' says he.
har1880.2007.001.0116.jpg
"But Brer Fox, he button up his coat-collar tight en des put out for home. En dat w'at you better do, honey, kaze I see Miss Sally's shadder sailin' backerds en for'ds 'fo' de winder, en de fus' news you know she'll be spectin' un you." "But Brer Fox, he button up his coat-collar tight and just put out for home. And that what you better do, honey, 'cause I see Miss Sally's shadow sailing backwards and forwards before the window, and the first news you know she'll be expecting of you."
XXIII.
MR. RABBIT AND MR. BEAR.
"Dar wuz one season," "There was one season," said Uncle Remus, pulling thoughtfully at his whiskers, "w'en Brer Fox say to hisse'f dat he speck he better whirl in en plant a goober-patch, en in dem days, mon, hit wuz tech en go. De wud wern't mo'n out'n his mouf 'fo' de groun' 'uz brok'd up en de goobers 'uz planted. Ole Brer Rabbit, he sot off en watch de motions, he did, en he sorter shet one eye en sing to his chilluns: "when Brer Fox say to hisself that he expect he better whirl in and plant a goober-patch, and in them days, man, it was touch and go. The words weren't more than out of his mouth before the ground was broked up and the goobers was planted. Old Brer Rabbit, he set off and watch the motions, he did, and he sort of shut one eye and sing to his children:
"Sho' 'nuff w'en de goobers 'gun ter ripen up,
eve'y time Brer Fox go down ter his patch, he fine whar somebody bin
grabblin' 'mongst de vines, en he git mighty mad. He sorter speck who de
somebody is, but ole Brer Rabbit he cover his tracks so cute dat Brer Fox
dunner how ter ketch 'im. Bimeby, one day Brer Fox take a walk all
"Sure enough when the goobers begun to ripen up, every time Brer Fox go
down to his patch, he fine where somebody been grabbling amongst the
vines, and he get mighty mad. He sort of suspect who the somebody is, but
old Brer Rabbit he cover his tracks so cute that Brer Fox don't know how
to catch him. By and by, one day Brer Fox take a walk all
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roun' de groun'-pea patch, en 'twan't long 'fo' he
fine a crack in de fence whar de rail done bin rub right smoove, en right
dar he sot 'im a trap. He tuck'n ben' down a
round the ground-pea patch, and it wasn't long before he find a crack
in the fence where the rail done been rub right smooth, and right there
he set him a trap. He took and bend down a
hick'ry saplin', growin' in de fence-cornder, en
tie one een' un a plow-line on de top, en in de udder een' he fix a
loop-knot, en dat he fasten wid a trigger right in de crack. Nex' mawnin'
w'en ole Brer Rabbit come slippin' 'long en crope thoo de crack, de
loop-knot kotch 'im behime de fo' legs, en de saplin' flew'd up, en dar
he wuz 'twix' de heavens en de yeth. Dar he swung, en he fear'd he
gwineter fall, en he fear'd he wern't gwineter fall. W'ile he
hickory sapling, growing in the fence-corner, and tie one end of a
plow-line on the top, and in the other end he fix a loop-knot, and that
he fasten with a trigger right in the crack. Next morning when old Brer
Rabbit come slipping along and crept through the crack, the loop-knot
catch him behind the fore legs, and the sapling flewed up, and
there he was betwixt the heavens and the earth. There he swung, and he
feared he going to fall, and he feared he weren't going to fall. While
he
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wuz a fixin' up a tale fer Brer Fox, he hear a
lumberin' down de road, en present'y yer cum ole Brer B'ar amblin' 'long
fum whar he bin takin' a bee-tree. Brer Rabbit, he hail 'im:
was a fixing up a tale for Brer Fox, he hear a lumbering down the road,
and presently here come old Brer Bear ambling along from where he been
taking a bee-tree. Brer Rabbit, he hail him:
"'Howdy, Brer B'ar!' Bear
"Brer B'ar, he look 'roun en bimeby he see Brer Rabbit swingin' fum de saplin', en he holler out: "Brer Bear, he look around and by and by he see Brer Rabbit swinging from the sapling, and he holler out:
"'Heyo, Brer Rabbit! How you come on dis mawnin'?' "'Heyo, Brer Rabbit! How you come on this morning?'
"'Much oblije, I'm middlin', Brer B'ar,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'Much obliged, I'm middling, Brer Bear,' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"Den Brer B'ar, he ax Brer Rabbit w'at he doin' up dar in de elements, en Brer Rabbit, he up'n say he makin' dollar minnit. Brer B'ar, he say how. Brer Rabbit say he keepin' crows out'n Brer Fox's groun'-pea patch, en den he ax Brer B'ar ef he don't wanter make dollar minnit, kaze he got big fambly er chilluns fer ter take keer un, en den he make sech nice skeer-crow. Brer B'ar 'low dat he take de job, en den Brer Rabbit show 'im how ter ben' down de saplin', en twan't long 'fo' Brer B'ar wuz swingin' up dar in Brer Rabbit place. Den Brer Rabbit, he put out fer Brer Fox house, en w'en he got dar he sing out: "Then Brer Bear, he ask Brer Rabbit what he doing up there in the elements, and Brer Rabbit, he up and say he making dollar minute. Brer Bear, he say how. Brer Rabbit say he keeping crows out of Brer Fox's ground-pea patch, and then he ask Brer Bear if he don't want to make dollar minute, 'cause he got big family of children for to take care of, and then he make such nice scare-crow. Brer Bear allow that he take the job, and then Brer Rabbit show him how to bend down the sapling, and it wasn't long before Brer Bear was swinging up there in Brer Rabbit place. Then Brer Rabbit, he put out for Brer Fox house, and when he got there he sing out:
"'Brer Fox! Oh, Brer Fox! Come out yer, Brer Fox, en I'll show you de man w'at bin stealin' yo' goobers.' "'Brer Fox! Oh, Brer Fox! Come out here, Brer Fox, and I'll show you the man what been stealing your goobers.'
"Brer Fox, he grab up his walkin'-stick, en bofe un um went runnin' back down ter der goober-patch, en w'en dey got dar, sho 'nuff, dar wuz ole Brer B'ar. "Brer Fox, he grab up his walking-stick, and both of them went running back down to their goober-patch, and when they got there, sure enough, there was old Brer Bear.
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"'Oh, yes! youer kotch, is you?' sez Brer Fox, en 'fo' Brer B'ar could 'splain, Brer Rabbit he jump up en down, en holler out: "'Oh, yes! you're catch, is you?' says Brer Fox, and before Brer Bear could explain, Brer Rabbit he jump up and down, and holler out:
"'Hit 'im in de mouf, Brer Fox; hit 'im in de mouf'; en Brer Fox, he draw back wid de walkin'-cane, en blip he tuck 'im, en eve'y time Brer B'ar'd try ter 'splain, Brer Fox'd shower down on him. "'Hit him in the mouth, Brer Fox; hit him in the mouth'; and Brer Fox, he draw back with the walking-cane, and blip he took him, and every time Brer Bear'd try to explain, Brer Fox'd shower down on him.
"W'iles all dis 'uz gwine on, Brer Rabbit, he slip off en git in a mud-hole en des lef' his eyes stickin' out, kaze he know'd dat Brer B'ar'd be a comin' atter 'im. Sho 'nuff, bimeby here come Brer B'ar down de road, en w'en he git ter de mud-hole, he say: "while all this was going on, Brer Rabbit, he slip off and get in a mud-hole and just left his eyes sticking out, 'cause he knowed that Brer Bear'd be a coming after him. Sure enough, by and by here come Brer Bear down the road, and when he get to the mud-hole, he say:
"'Howdy, Brer Frog; is you seed Brer Rabbit go by yer?' "'Howdy, Brer Frog; is you seen Brer Rabbit go by here?'
"'He des gone by,' sez Brer Rabbit, en ole man B'ar tuck off down de road like a skeer'd mule, en Brer Rabbit, he come out en dry hisse'f in de sun, en go home ter his fambly same ez enny udder man." "'He just gone by,' says Brer Rabbit, and old man Bear took off down the road like a scared mule, and Brer Rabbit, he come out and dry hisself in the sun, and go home to his family same as any other man."
"The Bear didn't catch the Rabbit, then?" inquired the little boy, sleepily.
"Jump up fum dar, honey!" "Jump up from there, honey!" exclaimed Uncle Remus, by way of reply. "I ain't got no time fer ter be settin' yer proppin' yo' eyeleds open." "I ain't got no time for to be setting here propping your eyelids open."
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XXIV.
MR. BEAR CATCHES OLD MR. BULL-FROG.
"Well, Uncle Remus," said the little boy, counting to see if he hadn't lost a marble somewhere, "the Bear didn't catch the Rabbit after all, did he?"
"Now you talkin', honey," "Now you talking, honey," replied the old man, his earnest face breaking up into little eddies of smiles— "now you talkin' sho. 'Tain't bin proned inter no Brer B'ar fer ter kotch Brer Rabbit. Hit sorter like settin' a mule fer ter trap a hummin'-bird. But Brer B'ar, he tuck'n got hisse'f inter some mo' trubble, w'ich it look like it mighty easy. Ef folks could make der livin' longer gittin' inter trubble," "now you talking sure. It ain't been proned into no Brer Bear for to catch Brer Rabbit. It sort of like setting a mule for to trap a humming-bird. But Brer Bear, he took and got hisself into some more trouble, which it look like it mighty easy. If folks could make their living along with getting into trouble," continued the old man, looking curiously at the little boy, "ole Miss Favers wouldn't be bodder'n yo' ma fer ter borry a cup full er sugar eve'y now en den; en it look like ter me dat I knows a nigger dat wouldn't be squattin' 'roun' yer makin' dese yer fish-baskits." "old Miss Favers wouldn't be bothering your ma for to borrow a cup full of sugar every now and then; and it look like to me that I knows a nigger that wouldn't be squatting around here making these here fish-baskets."
"How did the Bear get into more trouble, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"Natchul, honey. Brer B'ar, he tuck a notion dat
ole Brer Bull-frog wuz de man wa't fool 'im, en he say dat he'd come up
wid 'im ef 'twuz a year atterwuds. But 'twan't no year, an 'twan't no
mont', en mo'n dat, hit wan't skasely a week, w'en bimeby one day Brer
B'ar wuz gwine home fum de takin' un a bee-tree, en lo en beholes, who
should he see but ole Brer Bull-frog settin' out on de aidge er de
mud-puddle fas' 'sleep! Brer B'ar drap his axe, he did, and
"Natural, honey. Brer Bear, he took a notion that old Brer Bull-frog
was the man what fool him, and he say that he'd come up with him if it
was a year afterwards. But it wasn't no year, and it wasn't no month, and
more than that, it wasn't scarcely a week, when by and by one day Brer
Bear was going home from the taking of a bee-tree, and lo and behold, who
should he see but old Brer Bull-frog setting out on the edge of the
mud-puddle fast asleep! Brer Bear drop his axe, he did, and
har1880.2007.001.0121.jpg
crope up, en retch out wid his paw, en scoop ole
Brer Bull-frog in des dis away."
crept up, and reach out with his paw, and scoop old Brer Bull-frog in
just this away."
Here the old man used his hand ladle-fashion, by way of illustration.
"He scoop 'im in, en dar he wuz. W'en Brer B'ar got
his clampers on 'im good, he sot down en talk at 'im.
>"He scoop him in, and there he was. When Brer B'ar got his clampers on
him good, he sat down and talk at him.
"'Howdy, Brer Bull-frog, howdy! En how yo' fambly? I hope deyer well, Brer Bull-frog, kaze dis day you got some bizness wid me w'at'll las' you a mighty long time.' "'Howdy, Brer Bull-frog, howdy! And how your family? I hope they're well, Brer Bull-frog, 'cause this day you got some business with me what'll last you a mighty long time.'
"Brer Bull-frog, he dunner w'at ter say. He dunner wat's up, en he don't say nuthin'. Ole Brer B'ar he keep runnin' on: "Brer Bull-frog, he don't know what to say. He don't know what's up, and he don't say nothing. Old Brer Bear he keep running on:
"'Youer de man w'at tuck en fool me 'bout Brer Rabbit t'er day. You had yo' fun, Brer Bull-frog, en now I'll git mine.' "'You're the man what took and fool me about Brer Rabbit the other day. You had your fun, Brer Bull-frog, and now I'll get mine.'
"Den Brer Bull-frog, he gin ter git skeerd, he did, en he up'n say: "Then Brer Bull-frog, he begin to get scared, he did, and he up and say:
"'W'at I bin doin' Brer B'ar? How I bin foolin' you?' "'What I been doing Brer Bear? How I been fooling you?'
"Den Brer B'ar laff, en make like he dunno, but he keep on talkin'. "Then Brer Bear laugh, and make like he don't know, but he keep on talking.
"'Oh, no, Brer Bull-frog! You ain't de man w'at stick yo' head up out'n de water en tell me Brer Rabbit done gone on by. Oh, no! you ain't de man. I boun' you ain't. 'Bout dat time, you wuz at home wid yo' fambly, whar you allers is. I dunner whar you wuz, but I knows whar you is, Brer Bull-frog, en hit's you en me fer it. Atter de sun goes down dis day you don't fool no mo' folks gwine 'long dis road.' "'Oh, no, Brer Bull-frog! You ain't the man what stick your head up out of the water and tell me Brer Rabbit done gone on by. Oh, no! you ain't the man. I bound you ain't. About that time, you was at home with your family, where you always is. I don't know where you was, but I knows where you is, Brer Bull-frog, and it's you and me for it. After the sun goes down this day you don't fool no more folks going along this road.'
"Co'se, Brer Bull-frog dunner w'at Brer B'ar
drivin' at,
"Course, Brer Bull-frog don't know what Brer Bear driving at,
har1880.2007.001.0122.jpg
but he know sump'n hatter be done, en dat mighty
soon, kaze Brer B'ar 'gun to snap his jaws tergedder en foam at de mouf,
en Brer Bull-frog holler out:
but he know something had to be done, and that mighty soon, 'cause Brer
Bear begun to snap his jaws together and foam at the mouth, and Brer
Bull-frog holler out:
"'Oh, pray, Brer B'ar! Lemme off dis time, en I won't never do so no mo'. Oh, pray, Brer B'ar! do lemme off dis time, en I'll show you de fattes' bee-tree in de woods.' "'Oh, pray, Brer Bear! Let me off this time, and I won't never do so no more. Oh, pray, Brer Bear! do let me off this time, and I'll show you the fattest bee-tree in the woods.'
"Ole Brer B'ar, he chomp his toofies en foam at de mouf. Brer Bull-frog he des up'n squall: "Old Brer Bear, he chomp his tooths and foam at the mouth. Brer Bull-frog he just up and squall:
"'Oh, pray, Brer B'ar! I won't never do so no mo'! Oh, pray, Brer B'ar! lemme off dis time!' "'Oh, pray, Brer Bear! I won't never do so no more! Oh, pray, Brer Bear! let me off this time!'
"But ole Brer B'ar say he gwineter make way wid 'im, en den he sot en study, ole Brer B'ar did, how he gwineter squench Brer Bull-frog. He know he can't drown 'im, en he ain't got no fier fer ter bu'n 'im, en he git mighty pestered. Bimeby ole Brer Bull-frog, he sorter stop his cryin' en his boo-hooin', en he up'n say: "But old Brer Bear say he going to make way with him, and then he sat and study, old Brer Bear did, how he going to squench Brer Bull-frog. He know he can't drown him, and he ain't got no fire for to burn him, and he get mighty pestered. By and by old Brer Bull-frog, he sort of stop his crying and his boo-hooing, and he up and say:
"'Ef you gwineter kill me, Brer B'ar, kyar me ter dat big flat rock out dar on de aidge er de mill-pon', whar I kin see my fambly, en atter I see um, den you kin take you axe en sqush me.' "'If you going to kill me, Brer Bear, carry me to that big flat rock out there on the edge of the mill-pond, where I can see my family, and after I see them, then you can take you axe and sqush me.'
"Dis look so fa'r and squar' dat Brer B'ar he 'gree, en he take ole Brer Bull-frog by wunner his behime legs, en sling his axe on his shoulder, en off he put fer de big flat rock. When he git dar he lay Brer Bull-frog down on de rock, en Brer Bull-frog make like he lookin' 'roun' fer his folks. Den Brer B'ar, he draw long breff en pick up his axe. Den he spit in his han's en draw back en come down on de rock—pow!" "This look so fair and square that Brer Bear he agree, and he take old Brer Bull-frog by one of his behind legs, and sling his axe on his shoulder, and off he put for the big flat rock. When he get there he lay Brer Bull-frog down on the rock, and Brer Bull-frog make like he looking around for his folks. Then Brer Bear, he draw long breath and pick up his axe. Then he spit in his hands and draw back and come down on the rock—pow!"
"Did he kill the Frog, Uncle Remus?" asked the little
har1880.2007.001.0123.jpg
boy, as the old man paused to
scoop up a thimbleful of glowing embers in his pipe.
"'Deed, en dat he didn't, honey. 'Twix' de time w'en Brer B'ar raise up wid his axe en w'en he come down wid it, ole Brer Bull-frog he lipt up en dove down in de mill-pon', kerblink-kerblunk! En w'en he riz way out in de pon' he riz a singin', en dish yer's de song w'at he sing: "'Indeed, and that he didn't, honey. Betwixt the time when Brer Bear raise up with his axe and when he come down with it, old Brer Bull-frog he leaped up and dove down in the mill-pond, kerblink-kerblunk! And when he rose way out in the pond he rose a singing, and this here's the song what he sing:
"That's a mighty funny song," said the little boy.
"Funny now, I speck," "Funny now, I expect," said the old man, "but 'twern't funny in dem days, en 'twouldn't be funny now ef folks know'd much 'bout de Bull-frog langwidge ez dey useter. Dat's w'at." "but it weren't funny in them days, and it wouldn't be funny now if folks knowed much about the Bull-frog language as they used to. That's what."
har1880.2007.001.0124.jpg
XXV.
HOW MR. RABBIT LOST HIS FINE BUSHY TAIL.
"One time," said Uncle Remus, sighing heavily and settling himself back in his seat with an air of melancholy resignation— "one time Brer Rabbit wuz gwine 'long down de road shakin' his big bushy tail, en feelin' des ez scrumpshus ez a bee-martin wid a fresh bug." "one time Brer Rabbit was going along down the road shaking his big bushy tail, and feeling just as scrumptious as a bee-martin with a fresh bug." Here the old man paused and glanced at the little boy, but it was evident that the youngster had become so accustomed to the marvelous developments of Uncle Remus's stories, that the extraordinary statement made no unusual impression upon him. Therefore the old man began again, and this time in a louder and more insinuating tone:
"One time ole man Rabbit, he wuz gwine 'long down de road shakin' his long, bushy tail, en feelin' mighty biggity." "One time old man Rabbit, he was going along down the road shaking his long, bushy tail, and feeling mighty biggity."
This was effective.
"Great goodness, Uncle Remus!" exclaimed the little boy in open-eyed wonder, "everybody knows that rabbits haven't got long, bushy tails."
The old man shifted his position in his chair and allowed his venerable head to drop forward until his whole appearance was suggestive of the deepest dejection; and this was intensified by a groan that seemed to be the result of great mental agony. Finally he spoke, but not as addressing himself to the little boy.
"I notices dat dem fokes w'at makes a great
'miration
"I notices that them folks what makes a great admiration
har1880.2007.001.0125.jpg
'bout w'at dey knows is des de folks w'ich you
can't put no 'pennunce in w'en de 'cashun come up. Yer one un um now, en
he done come en excuse me er 'lowin' dat rabbits is got long, bushy
tails, w'ich goodness knows ef I'd a dremp' it, I'd a whirl in en ondremp
it."
about what they knows is just the folks which you can't put no
dependence in when the occasion come up. You're one of them now, and he
done come and excuse me for allowing that rabbits is got long, bushy
tails, which goodness knows if I'd a dreamt it, I'd a
whirl in and undreamt it."
"Well, but Uncle Remus, you said rabbits had long, bushy tails," replied the little boy. "Now you know you did."
"Ef I ain't fergit it off'n my mine, I say dat ole Brer Rabbit wuz gwine down de big road shakin' his long, bushy tail. Dat w'at I say, en dat I stan's by." "If I ain't forget it off of my mind, I say that old Brer Rabbit was going down the big road shaking his long, bushy tail. That what I say, and that I stands by."
The little boy looked puzzled, but he didn't say anything. After a while the old man continued:
har1880.2007.001.0126.jpg
"Now, den, ef dat's 'greed ter, I'm gwine on, en ef tain't 'greed ter, den I'm gwineter pick up my cane en look atter my own intrust. I got wuk lyin' roun' yer dat's des natally gittin' moldy." "Now, then, if that's agreed to, I'm going on, and if it ain't agreed to, then I'm going to pick up my cane and look after my own interest. I got work lying round here that's just naturally getting moldy."
The little boy still remained quiet, and Uncle Remus proceeded:
"One day Brer Rabbit wuz gwine down de road shakin'
his long, bushy tail, w'en who should he strike up wid but ole Brer Fox
gwine amblin' long wid a big string er fish! W'en dey pass de time er day
wid wunner nudder, Brer Rabbit, he open up de confab, he did, en he ax
Brer Fox whar he git dat nice string er fish, en Brer Fox, he up'n 'spon'
dat he kotch um, en Brer Rabbit, he say whar'bouts, en Brer Fox, he say
down at de babtizin' creek, en Brer Rabbit he ax how, kaze in dem days
dey wuz monstus fon' er minners, en Brer Fox, he sot down on a log, he
did, en he up'n tell Brer Rabbit dat all he gotter do fer ter git er big
mess er minners is ter go ter de creek atter sun down, en drap his tail
in de water en set dar twel daylight, en den draw up a whole armful er
fishes, en dem w'at he don't want, he kin fling back. Right dar's whar
Brer Rabbit drap his watermillion, kaze he tuck'n sot out dat night en
went a fishin'. De wedder wuz sorter cole, en Brer Rabbit, he got 'im a
bottle er dram en put out fer de creek, en w'en he git dar he pick out a
good place, en he sorter squot down, he did, en let his tail hang in de
water. He sot dar, en he sot dar, en he drunk his dram, en he think he
gwineter freeze, but bimeby day come, en dar he wuz. He make a pull, en
he feel like he comin' in' two, en he
"One day Brer Rabbit was going down the road shaking his long, bushy
tail, when who should he strike up with but old Brer Fox going ambling
long with a big string of fish! When they pass the time
of day with one another, Brer Rabbit, he open up the confab, he did, and
he ask Brer Fox where he get that nice string of fish, and
Brer Fox, he up and respond that he catch them, and Brer Rabbit, he say
whereabouts, and Brer Fox, he say down at the baptizing creek, and Brer
Rabbit he ask how, 'cause in them days they was monstrous fond
of minnows, and Brer Fox, he sat down on a log, he did, and he up and
tell Brer Rabbit that all he got to do for to get a big mess of minnows
is to go to the creek after sun down, and drop his tail in the water and
set there til daylight, and then draw up a whole armful of fishes, and
them what he don't want, he can fling back. Right there's where Brer
Rabbit drop his watermelon, 'cause he took and set out that night and
went a fishing. The weather was sort of cold, and Brer Rabbit, he got him
a bottle of dram and put out for the creek, and when he get there he pick
out a good place, and he sort of squat down, he did, and let his tail
hang in the water. He sat there, and he sat there, and he drunk his dram,
and he think he going to freeze, but by and by day come, and there he
was. He make a pull, and he feel like he coming in two, and he
har1880.2007.001.0127.jpg
fetch nudder jerk, en lo en beholes, whar wuz his
tail?"
fetch another jerk, and lo and behold, where was his tail?"
There was a long pause.
"Did it come off, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy, presently.
"She did dat!" "She did that!" replied the old man with unction. "She did dat and dat w'at make all deze yer bob-tail rabbits w'at you see hoppin' en skaddlin thoo de woods." "She did that and that what make all these here bob-tail rabbits what you see hopping and scattering through the woods."
"Are they all that way just because the old Rabbit lost his tail in the creek?" asked the little boy.
"Dat's it, honey," "That's it, honey," replied the old man. "Dat's w'at dey tells me. Look like dey er bleedzd ter take atter der pa." "That's what they tells me. Look like they are bleedzd to take after their pa."
XXVI.
MR. TERRAPIN SHOWS HIS STRENGTH.
"Brer Tarrypin wuz de out'nes' man," "Brer Terrapin was the out'nes' man," said Uncle Remus, rubbing his hands together contemplatively, and chuckling to himself in a very significant manner; "he wuz de out'nes' man er de whole gang. He wuz dat." "he was the out'nes' man of the whole gang. He was that."
The little boy sat perfectly quiet, betraying no impatience when Uncle Remus paused to hunt, first in one pocket and then in another, for enough crumbs of tobacco to replenish his pipe. Presently the old man proceeded:
"One night Miss Meadows en de gals dey gun a
candy-pullin', en so many er de nabers come in 'sponse ter de invite
"One night Miss Meadows and the gals they begun a candy-pulling, and so
many of the neighbors come in response to the invite
har1880.2007.001.0128.jpg
dat dey hatter put de 'lasses in de wash pot en
b'il' de fier in de yard. Brer B'ar, he
hope
Miss Meadows bring de wood, Brer Fox, he men' de fier, Brer Wolf, he kep'
de dogs off, Brer Rabbit, he grease de bottom er de plates fer ter keep
de candy fum stickin', en Brer Tarrypin, he klum up in a cheer, en say
he'd watch en see dat de 'lasses didn't bile over. Dey wuz all dere, en
dey wern't cuttin' up no didos, nudder, kase Miss Meadows, she done put
her foot down, she did, en say dat w'en dey come ter her place dey hatter
hang up a flag er truce at de front gate en 'bide by it.
that they had to put the molasses in the wash pot and build the fire in
the yard. Brer Bear, he
hope
Miss Meadows bring the wood, Brer Fox, he mend the fire, Brer Wolf, he
kept the dogs off, Brer Rabbit, he grease the bottom of the plates for to
keep the candy from sticking, and Brer Terrapin, he klum
up in a chair, and say he'd watch and see that the molasses didn't boil
over. They was all there, and they weren't cutting up no didos, neither,
'cause Miss Meadows, she done put her foot down, she did, and say that
when they come to her place they had to hang up a flag of truce at the
front gate and abide by it.
"Well, den, w'iles dey wuz all a settin' dar en de 'lasses wuz a bilin' en a blubberin', dey got ter runnin' on talkin' mighty biggity. Brer Rabbit, he say he de swiffes'; but Brer Tarrypin, he rock 'long in de cheer en watch de 'lasses. Brer Fox, he say he de sharpes', but Brer Tarrypin he rock 'long. Brer Wolf, he say he de mos' suvvigus, but Brer Tarrypin, he rock en he rock 'long. Brer B'ar, he say he de mos' stronges', but Brer Tarrypin he rock, en he keep on rockin'. Bimeby he sorter shet one eye, en say, sezee: "Well, then, while they was all a setting there and the molasses was a boiling and a blubbering, they got to running on talking mighty biggity. Brer Rabbit, he say he the swiftest; but Brer Terrapin, he rock along in the chair and watch the molasses. Brer Fox, he say he the sharpest, but Brer Terrapin he rock along. Brer Wolf, he say he de most suvvigus, but Brer Terrapin, he rock and he rock along. Brer Bear, he say he the most strongest, but Brer Terrapin he rock, and he keep on rocking. By and by he sort of shut one eye, and say, says he:
"'Hit look like 'periently dat de ole hardshell ain't nowhars 'longside er dis crowd, yit yer I is, en I'm de same man w'at show Brer Rabbit dat he ain't he swiffes'; en I'm de same man w'at kin show Brer B'ar dat he ain't de stronges',' sezee. "'It look like apparently that the old hardshell ain't nowheres alongside of this crowd, yet here I is, and I'm the same man what show Brer Rabbit that he ain't the swiftest; and I'm the same man what can show Brer Bear that he ain't the strongest,' says he.
"Den dey all laff en holler, kaze it look like Brer B'ar mo' stronger dan a steer. Bimeby, Miss Meadows, she up'n ax, she did, how he gwine do it. "Then they all laugh and holler, 'cause it look like Brer Bear more stronger than a steer. By and by, Miss Meadows, she up and ask, she did, how he going do it.
har1880.2007.001.0129.jpg
"'Gimme a good strong rope,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee, 'en lemme git in er puddle er water, en den let Brer B'ar see ef he kin pull me out,' sezee. "'Give me a good strong rope,' says Brer Terrapin, says he, 'and let me get in a puddle of water, and then let Brer Bear see if he can pull me out,' says he.
"Den dey all laff g'in, en Brer B'ar, he ups en sez, sezee: 'We ain't got no rope,' sezee. "Then they all laugh again, and Brer Bear, he ups and says, says he: 'We ain't got no rope,' says he.
"'No,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee, 'en needer is you got de strenk,' sezee, en den Brer Tarrypin, he rock en rock 'long, en watch de 'lasses a bilin' en a blubberin'. "'No,' says Brer Terrapin, says he, 'and neither is you got the strength,' says he, and then Brer Terrapin, he rock and rock along, and watch the molasses a boiling and a blubbering.
"Atter w'ile Miss Meadows, she up en say, she did, dat she'd take'n loan de young men her bed-cord, en w'iles de candy wuz a coolin' in de plates, dey could all go ter de branch en see Brer Tarrypin kyar out his projick. Brer Tarrypin," "After while Miss Meadows, she up and say, she did, that she'd take and loan the young men her bed-cord, and while the candy was a cooling in the plates, they could all go to the branch and see Brer Terrapin carry out his project. Brer Terrapin," continued Uncle Remus, in a tone at once confidential and argumentative, "wern't much bigger'n de pa'm er my han', en it look mighty funny fer ter year 'im braggin' 'bout how he kin outpull Brer B'ar. But dey got de bed-cord atter w'ile, en den dey all put out ter de branch. W'en Brer Tarrypin fine de place he wanter, he tuck one een' er de bed-cord, en gun de yuther een' to Brer B'ar. "weren't much bigger than the palm of my hand, and it look mighty funny for to hear him bragging about how he can outpull Brer Bear. But they got the bed-cord after while, and then they all put out to the branch. When Brer Terrapin find the place he wanted, he took one end of the bed-cord, and give the other end to Brer Bear.
"'Now den, ladies en gents,' sez Brer Tarrypin, sezee, 'you all go wid Brer B'ar up dar in de woods en I'll stay yer, en w'en you year me holler, den's de time fer Brer B'ar fer ter see ef he kin haul in de slack er de rope. You all take keer er dat ar een',' sezee, 'en I'll take keer er dish yer een',' sezee. "'Now then, ladies and gents,' says Brer Terrapin, says he, 'you all go with Brer Bear up there in the woods and I'll stay here, and when you hear me holler, then's the time for Brer Bear for to see if he can haul in the slack of the rope. You all take care of that there end,' says he, 'and I'll take care of this here end,' says he.
"Den dey all put out en lef' Brer Tarrypin at de branch, en w'en dey got good en gone, he dove down inter de water, he did, en tie de bedcord hard en fas' ter wunner deze yer big clay-roots, en den he riz up en gin a whoop. "Then they all put out and left Brer Terrapin at the branch, and when they got good and gone, he dove down into the water, he did, and tie the bed cord hard and fast to one of these here big clay-roots, and then he rose up and give a whoop.
har1880.2007.001.0130.jpg
"Brer B'ar he wrop de bed-cord roun' his han', en wink at de gals, en wid dat he gin a big juk, but Brer Tarrypin ain't budge. Den he take bofe han's en gin a big pull, but, all de same, Brer Tarrypin ain't budge. Den he tu'n 'roun,' he did, en put de rope cross his shoulders en try ter walk off wid Brer Tarrypin, but Brer Tarrypin look like he don't feel like walkin'. Den Brer Wolf, he put in en hope Brer B'ar pull, but dez like he didn't, en den dey all hope 'im, en, bless grashus! w'iles dey wuz all a pullin', Brer Tarrypin, he holler, en ax um w'y dey don't take up de slack. Den w'en Brer Tarrypin feel um quit pullin', he dove down, he did, en ontie de rope, en by de time dey got ter de branch, Brer Tarrypin, he wuz settin' in de aidge er de water des ez natchul ez de nex' un, en he up'n say, sezee: "Brer Bear he wrap the bed-cord round his hand, and wink at the gals, and with that he give a big jerk, but Brer Terrapin ain't budge. Then he take both hands and give a big pull, but, all the same, Brer Terrapin ain't budge. Then he turn around, he did, and put the rope cross his shoulders and try to walk off with Brer Terrapin, but Brer Terrapin look like he don't feel like walking. Then Brer Wolf, he put in and hope Brer Bear pull, but just like he didn't, and then they all hope him, and, bless gracious! while they was all a pulling, Brer Terrapin he holler, and ask them why they don't take up the slack. Then when Brer Terrapin feel them quit pulling, he dove down, he did, and untie the rope, and by the time they got to the branch, Brer Terrapin, he was setting in the edge of the water just as natural as the next one, and he up and say, says he:
"'Dat las' pull er yone wuz a mighty stiff un, en a leetle mo'n you'd er had me,' sezee. 'Youer monstus stout, Brer B'ar,' sezee, 'en you pulls like a yoke er steers, but I sorter had de purchis on you,' sezee. "'That last pull of yours was a mighty stiff one, and a little more and you'd have had me,' says he. 'You're monstrous stout, Brer Bear,' says he, 'and you pulls like a yoke of steers, but I sort of had the purchase on you,' says he.
Den Brer B'ar, bein's his mouf 'gun ter water atter de sweetnin', he up'n say he speck de candy's ripe, en off dey put atter it!" Then Brer Bear, being as his mouth begun to water after the sweetning, he up and say he expect the candy's ripe, and off they put after it!"
"It's a wonder," said the little boy, after a while, "that the rope didn't break."
"Break who?" exclaimed Uncle Remus, with a touch of indignation in his tone— "break who? In dem days, Miss Meadows's bed-cord would a hilt a mule." "break who? In them days, Miss Meadows's bed-cord would have held a mule."
This put an end to whatever doubts the child might have entertained.
har1880.2007.001.0131.jpg
XXVII.
WHY MR. POSSUM HAS NO HAIR ON HIS TAIL.
"Hit look like ter me," "It look like to me," said Uncle Remus, frowning, as the little boy came hopping and skipping into the old man's cabin, "dat I see a young un 'bout yo' size playin' en makin' free wid dem ar chilluns er ole Miss Favers's yistiddy, en w'en I seed dat, I drap my axe, en I come in yer en sot flat down right whar youer settin' now, en I say ter myse'f dat it's 'bout time fer ole Remus fer ter hang up en quit. Dat's des zackly w'at I say." "that I see a young un about your size playing and making free with them there children of old Miss Favers's yesterday, and when I seed that, I drop my axe, and I come in here and sat flat down right where you're setting now, and I say to myself that it's about time for old Remus for to hang up and quit. That's just exactly what I say."
"Well, Uncle Remus, they called me," said the little boy, in a penitent tone. "They come and called me, and said they had a pistol and some powder over there."
"Dar now!"
"There now!"
exclaimed the old man, indignantly.
"Dar now! w'at I bin sayin'? Hit's des a born
blessin' dat you wa'n't brung home on a litter wid bofe eyeballs hangin'
out en one year clean gone; dat's w'at 'tis! Hit's des a born blessin'.
Hit hope me up might'ly de udder day w'en I hear Miss Sally layin' down
de law 'bout you en dem Favers chillun, yit, lo en beholes, de fus news I
knows yer you is han'-in-glove wid um. Hit's nuff fer ter fetch ole Miss
right up out'n dat berryin'-groun' fum down dar in Putmon County, en w'at
yo' gran'ma wouldn't er stood me en yo' ma ain't gwineter stan' nudder,
en de nex' time I hear 'bout sech a come off az dis, right den en dar I'm
boun' ter lay de case 'fo' Miss Sally. Dem Favers's wa'n't no 'count 'fo'
de war, en dey wa'n't no 'count endurin' er de war, en dey ain't no
'count atterwards, en w'iles my
"There now! what I been saying? It's just a born blessing that you
wasn't brung home on a litter with both eyeballs hanging out and one ear
clean gone; that's what it is! It's just a born blessing. It
hope me up mightily the other day when I hear Miss Sally
laying down the law about you and them Favers children, yet, lo and
behold, the first news I knows here you is hand-in-glove with them. It's
enough for to fetch old Miss right up out of that burying-ground from
down there in Putnam County, and what your grandma wouldn't have stood me
and your ma ain't going to stand neither, and the next time I hear about
such a come off as this, right then and there I'm bound to lay the case
before Miss Sally. Them Favers's wasn't no account before the war, and
they wasn't no account enduring of the war, and
they ain't no account afterwards, and while my
har1880.2007.001.0132.jpg
head's hot you ain't gwineter go mixin' up yo'se'f
wid de riff-raff er creashun."
head's hot you ain't going to go mixing up yourself with the riff-raff
of creation."
The little boy made no further attempt to justify his conduct. He was a very wise little boy, and he knew that, in Uncle Remus's eyes, he had been guilty of a flagrant violation of the family code. Therefore, instead of attempting to justify himself, he pleaded guilty, and promised that he would never do so any more. After this there was a long period of silence, broken only by the vigorous style in which Uncle Remus puffed away at his pipe. This was the invariable result. Whenever the old man had occasion to reprimand the little boy—and the occasions were frequent—he would relapse into a dignified but stubborn silence. Presently the youngster drew forth from his pocket a long piece of candle. The sharp eyes of the old man saw it at once.
"Don't you come a tellin' me dat Miss Sally gun you dat," "Don't you come a telling me that Miss Sally gun you that," he exclaimed, "kaze she didn't. En I lay you hatter be monstus sly 'fo' you gotter chance fer ter snatch up dat piece er cannle." "'cause she didn't. And I lay you had to be monstrous sly before you got a chance for to snatch up that piece of candle."
"Well, Uncle Remus," the little boy explained, "it was lying there all by itself, and I just thought I'd fetch it out to you."
"Dat's so, honey," "That's so, honey," said Uncle Remus, greatly mollified; "dat's so, kaze by now some er dem yuther niggers 'ud er done had her light up. Dey er mighty biggity, dem house niggers is, but I notices dat dey don't let nuthin' pass. Dey goes 'long wid der han's en der mouf open, en w'at one don't ketch de tother one do." "that's so, 'cause by now some of them other niggers would have done had her light up. They are mighty biggity, them house niggers is, but I notices that they don't let nothing pass. They goes along with their hands and their mouth open, and what one don't catch the other one do."
har1880.2007.001.0133.jpg
There was another pause, and finally the little boy said:
"Uncle Remus, you know you promised today to tell me why the 'Possum has no hair on his tail."
"Law, honey! ain't you done gone en fergot dat off'n yo' mine yit? Hit look like ter me," "Lord, honey! ain't you done gone and forgot that off of your mind yet? It look like to me," continued the old man, leisurely refilling his pipe, "dat she sorter run like dis: One time ole Brer Possum, he git so hongry, he did, dat he bleedzd fer ter have a mess er 'simmons. He monstus lazy man, ole Brer Possum wuz, but bimeby his stummuck 'gun ter growl en holler at 'im so dat he des hatter rack 'roun' en hunt up sump'n; en w'iles he wuz rackin' 'roun', who sh'd he run up wid but Brer Rabbit, en dey wuz hail-fellers, kaze Brer Possum, he ain't bin bodder'n Brer Rabbit like dem yuther beas's. Dey sot down by de side er de big road, en dar dey jabber en confab 'mong wunner nudder, twel bimeby old Brer Possum, he take 'n tell Brer Rabbit dat he mos' pe'sh out, en Brer Rabbit, he lip up in de a'r, he did, en smack his han's tergedder, en say dat he know right whar Brer Possum kin git a bait er 'simmons. Den Brer Possum, he say whar, en Brer Rabbit, he say w'ich 'twuz over at Brer B'ar's 'simmon orchard." "that she sort of run like this: One time old Brer Possum, he get so hungry, he did, that he bleedzd for to have a mess of persimmons. He monstrous lazy man, old Brer Possum was, but by and by his stomach begun to growl and holler at him so that he just had to rack around and hunt up something; and while he was racking around, who should he run up with but Brer Rabbit, and they was hail-fellows, 'cause Brer Possum, he ain't been bothering Brer Rabbit like them other beasts. They sat down by the side of the big road, and there they jabber and confab among one another, til by and by old Brer Possum, he take and tell Brer Rabbit that he mos' pe'sh out, and Brer Rabbit, he leaped up in the air, he did, and smack his hands together, and say that he know right where Brer Possum can get a bait of persimmons. Then Brer Possum, he say where, and Brer Rabbit, he say which it was over at Brer Bear's persimmon orchard."
"Did the Bear have a 'simmon orchard, Uncle Remus?" "Did the Bear have a persimmon orchard, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked.
"Co'se, honey, kase in dem days Brer B'ar wuz a
bee-hunter. He make his livin' findin' bee trees, en de way he fine um he
plant 'im some 'simmon-trees, w'ich de bees dey'd come ter suck de
'simmons en den ole Brer B'ar he'd watch um whar dey'd go, en den he'd be
mighty ap' for ter
"Course, honey, 'cause in them days Brer Bear was a bee-hunter. He make
his living finding bee trees, and the way he find them he plant him some
persimmon-trees, which the bees they'd come to suck the persimmons and
then old Brer Bear he'd watch them where they'd go, and then he'd be
mighty apt for to
har1880.2007.001.0134.jpg
come up wid um. No matter 'bout dat, de 'simmon
patch 'uz dar des like I tell you, en ole Brer Possum mouf 'gun ter water
soon's he year talk un um, en mos' 'fo' Brer Rabbit done tellin' 'im de
news, Brer Possum, he put out, he did, en 'twa'n't long 'fo' he wuz perch
up in de highes' tree in Brer B'ar 'simmon patch. But Brer Rabbit, he
done 'termin' fer ter see some fun, en w'iles all dis 'uz gwine on, he
run 'roun' ter Brer B'ar house, en holler en tell 'im w'ich dey wuz
somebody 'stroyin' un his 'simmons, en Brer B'ar, he hustle off fer ter
ketch 'im.
come up with them. No matter about that, the persimmon patch was there
just like I tell you, and old Brer Possum mouth begun to water soon as he
hear talk of them, and almost before Brer Rabbit done telling him the
news, Brer Possum, he put out, he did, and it wasn't long before he was
perch up in the highest tree in Brer Bear persimmon patch. But Brer
Rabbit, he done determined for to see some fun, and while all this was
going on, he run around to Brer Bear house, and holler and tell him which
they was somebody destroying of his persimmons, and Brer Bear, he hustle
off for to catch him.
"Eve'y now en den Brer Possum think he year Brer B'ar comin', but he keep on sayin', sezee: "Every now and then Brer Possum think he hear Brer Bear coming, but he keep on saying, says he:
"'I'll des git one mo' 'simmon en den I'll go; one 'simmon 'mo en den I'll go.' "'I'll just get one more persimmon and then I'll go; one persimmon more and then I'll go.'
"Las' he year Brer B'ar comin' sho nuff, but 'twuz de same ole chune—'One 'simmon mo' en den I'll go'—en des 'bout dat time Brer B'ar busted inter de patch, en gin de tree a shake, en Brer Possum, he drapt out longer de yuther ripe 'simmons, but time he totch de groun' he got his foots tergedder, en he lit out fer de fence same ez a race-hoss, en 'cross dat patch him en Brer B'ar had it, en Brer B'ar gain' eve'y jump, twel time Brer Possum make de fence Brer B'ar grab 'im by de tail, en Brer Possum, he went out 'tween de rails en gin a powerful juk en pull his tail out 'twix Brer B'ar tushes; en, lo en beholes, Brer B'ar hole so tight en Brer Possum pull so hard dat all de ha'r come off in Brer B'ar's mouf, w'ich, ef Brer Rabbit hadn't er happen up wid a go'd er water, Brer B'ar'd er got strankle. "Last he hear Brer Bear coming sure enough, but it was the same old tune—'One persimmon more and then I'll go'—and just about that time Brer Bear busted into the patch, and give the tree a shake, and Brer Possum, he dropped out along with the other ripe persimmons, but time he touch the ground he got his foots together, and he lit out for the fence same as a race-horse, and across that patch him and Brer Bear had it, and Brer Bear gained every jump, til time Brer Possum make the fence Brer Bear grab him by the tail, and Brer Possum, he went out between the rails and give a powerful jerk and pull his tail out betwixt Brer Bear tushes; and, lo and behold, Brer Bear hold so tight and Brer Possum pull so hard that all the hair come off in Brer Bear's mouth, which, if Brer Rabbit hadn't have happen up with a gourd of water, Brer Bear'd have got strangle.
"Fum dat day ter dis,"
"From that day to this,"
said Uncle Remus, knocking
har1880.2007.001.0135.jpg
the ashes carefully out of his
pipe,
"Brer Possum ain't had no h'ar on his tail, en
needer do his chilluns."
"Brer Possum ain't had no hair on his tail, and neither do his
children."
XXVIII.
THE END OF MR. BEAR.
The next time the little boy sought Uncle Remus out, he found the old man unusually cheerful and good-humored. His rheumatism had ceased to trouble him, and he was even disposed to be boisterous. He was singing when the little boy got near the cabin, and the child paused on the outside to listen to the vigorous but mellow voice of the old man, as it rose and fell with the burden of the curiously plaintive song—a senseless affair so far as the words were concerned, but sung to a melody almost thrilling in its sweetness:
The quick ear of Uncle Remus, however, had detected the presence of the little boy, and he allowed his song to run into a recitation of nonsense, of which the following, if it be rapidly spoken, will give a faint idea:
"Ole M'er Jackson, fines' confraction, fell down
sta'rs fer to git satisfaction; big Bill Fray, he rule de day, eve'ything
"Old Mister Jackson, finds confraction, fell down stairs for to get
satisfaction; big Bill Fray, he rule the day, everything
har1880.2007.001.0136.jpg
he call for come one, two by three. Gwine 'long one
day, met Johnny Huby, ax him grine nine yards er steel for me, tole me
w'ich he couldn't; den I hist 'im over Hickerson Dickerson's barn-doors;
knock 'im ninety-nine miles under water, w'en he rise, he rise in Pike
straddle un a hanspike, en I lef' 'im dar smokin' er de hornpipe, Juba
reda seda breda. Aunt Kate at de gate; I want to eat, she fry de meat en
gimme skin, w'ich I fling it back agin. Juba!"
he call for come one, two by three. Going along one day, met Johnny
Huby, ask him grind nine yards of steel for me, told me which
he couldn't; then I hoist him over Hickerson Dickerson's barn-doors;
knock him ninety-nine miles under water, when he rise, he rise in Pike
straddle un a hanspike, and I left him there
smoking er the hornpipe, Juba reda seda breda. Aunt Kate at
the gate; I want to eat, she fry the meat and give me skin, which I fling
it back again. Juba!"
All this, rattled off at a rapid rate and with apparent seriousness, was calculated to puzzle the little boy, and he slipped into his accustomed seat with an expression of awed bewilderment upon his face.
"Hit's all des dat away, honey," "It's all just that away, honey," continued the old man, with the air of one who had just given an important piece of information. "En w'en you bin cas'n shadders long ez de ole nigger, den you'll fine out who's w'ich, en w'ich's who." "And when you been casting shadows long as the old nigger, then you'll find out who's which, and which's who."
The little boy made no response. He was in thorough sympathy with all the whims and humors of the old man, and his capacity for enjoying them was large enough to include even those he could not understand. Uncle Remus was finishing an axe-handle, and upon these occasions it was his custom to allow the child to hold one end while he applied sand-paper to the other. These relations were pretty soon established, to the mutual satisfaction of the parties most interested, and the old man continued his remarks, but this time not at random:
"W'en I see deze yer swell-head folks like dat
'oman
"When I see these here swell-head folks like that woman
har1880.2007.001.0137.jpg
w'at come en tell yo' ma 'bout you chunkin' at her
chilluns, w'ich yo' ma make Mars John strop you, hit make my mine run
back to ole Brer B'ar. Ole Brer B'ar, he got de swell-headedness hisse'f,
en ef der wuz enny swinkin', hit swunk too late fer ter he'p ole Brer
B'ar. Leas'ways dat's w'at dey tells me, en I ain't never yearn it
'sputed."
what come and tell your ma about you chucking> at her children, which
your ma make Master John strop you, it make my mind run
back to old Brer Bear. Old Brer Bear, he got the swell-headedness
hisself, and if there was any swinkin', it
swunk too late for to help old Brer
Bear. Leastways that's what they tells me, and I ain't never heard it
disputed."
"Was the Bear's head sure enough swelled, Uncle Remus?"
"Now you talkin', honey!" "Now you talking, honey!" exclaimed the old man.
"Goodness! what made it swell?"
This was Uncle Remus's cue. Applying the sand-paper to the axe-helve with gentle vigor, he began:
"One time when Brer Rabbit wuz gwine lopin' home fum a frolic w'at dey bin havin' up at Miss Meadows's, who should he happin up wid but ole Brer B'ar. Co'se, atter w'at done pass 'twix um dey wa'n't no good feelin's 'tween Brer Rabbit en ole Brer B'ar, but Brer Rabbit, he wanter save his manners, en so he holler out: "One time when Brer Rabbit was going loping home from a frolic what they been having up at Miss Meadows's, who should he happen up with but old Brer Bear. Course, after what done pass betwixt them they wasn't no good feelings between Brer Rabbit and old Brer Bear, but Brer Rabbit, he want to save his manners, and so he holler out:
"'Heyo, Brer B'ar! how you come on? I aint seed you in a coon's age. How all down at yo' house? How Miss Brune en Miss Brindle?'" "'Heyo, Brer Bear! how you come on? I ain't seen you in a coon's age. How all down at your house? How Miss Brune and Miss Brindle?'"
"Who was that, Uncle Remus?" the little boy interrupted.
"Miss Brune en Miss Brindle? Miss Brune wuz Brer
B'ar's ole 'oman, en Miss Brindle wuz his gal. Dat w'at dey call um in
dem days. So den Brer Rabbit, he ax him howdy, he did, en Brer B'ar, he
'spon' dat he wuz mighty po'ly, en dey amble 'long, dey did, sorter
familious like, but Brer Rabbit, he keep one eye on Brer B'ar, en
"Miss Brune en Miss Brindle? Miss Brune was Brer Bear's old woman, and
Miss Brindle was his gal. That what they call them in them days. So then
Brer Rabbit, he ax him howdy, he did, en Brer Bear,
he responded that he was mighty poorly, and they amble along, they did,
sort of familiar like, but Brer Rabbit, he keep one eye on Brer Bear,
and
har1880.2007.001.0138.jpg
Brer B'ar, he study how he gwine nab Brer Rabbit.
Las' Brer Rabbit, he up'n say, sezee:
Brer Bear, he study how he going nab Brer Rabbit. Last Brer Rabbit, he
up and say, says he:
"'Brer B'ar, I speck I got some bizness cut out fer you,' sezee. "'Brer Bear, I expect I got some business cut out for you,' says he.
"'Wat dat, Brer Rabbit?' sez Brer B'ar, sezee. "'What that, Brer Rabbit?' says Brer Bear, says he.
"'W'iles I wuz cleanin' up my new-groun' day 'fo' yistiddy,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'I come 'cross wunner deze yer ole time bee-trees. Hit start holler at de bottom, en stay holler plum ter de top, en de honey's des natally oozin' out, en ef you'll drap yo' 'gagements en go 'longer me,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'you'll git a bait dat'll las' you en yo' fambly twel de middle er nex' mont',' sezee. "'While I was cleaning up my new-ground day before yesterday,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'I come across one of these here old time bee-trees. It start hollow at the bottom, and stay hollow plum to the top, and the honey's just naturally oozing out, and if you'll drop your engagements and go along with me,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'you'll get a bait that'll last you and your family til the middle of next month,' says he.
"Brer B'ar say he much oblije en he b'leeve he'll go 'long, en wid dat dey put out fer Brer Rabbit's new-groun', w'ich twa'n't so mighty fur. Leas'ways, dey got dar atter w'ile. Ole Brer B'ar, he 'low dat he kin smell de honey. Brer Rabbit, he 'low dat he kin see de honey-koam. Brer B'ar, he 'low dat he kin hear de bees a zoonin'. Dey stan' 'roun' en talk biggity, dey did, twel bimeby Brer Rabbit, he up'n say, sezee: "Brer Bear say he much obliged and he believe he'll go along, and with that they put out for Brer Rabbit's new-ground, which it wasn't so mighty far. Leastways, they got there after while. Old Brer Bear, he allow that he can smell the honey. Brer Rabbit, he allow that he can see the honey-comb. Brer Bear, he allow that he can hear the bees a zooning. They stand around and talk biggity, they did, til by and by Brer Rabbit, he up and say, says he:
"'You do de clim'in', Brer B'ar, en I'll do de rushin' 'roun'; you clime up ter de hole, en I'll take dis yer pine pole en shove de honey up whar you kin git 'er,' sezee. "'You do the climbing, Brer Bear, and I'll do the rushing around; you climb up to the hole, and I'll take this here pine pole and shove the honey up where you can get her,' says he.
"Ole Brer B'ar, he spit on his han's en skint up de
tree, en jam his head in de hole, en sho nuff, Brer Rabbit, he grab de
pine pole, en de way he stir up dem bees wuz sinful—dat's w'at it wuz.
Hit wuz sinful. En de bees dey swawm'd on Brer B'ar's head, twel 'fo' he
could take it out'n de hole hit wuz done swell up bigger dan dat
dinner-pot,
"Old Brer Bear, he spit on his hands and skinned up the tree, and jam
his head in the hole, and sure enough, Brer Rabbit, he grab the pine
pole, and the way he stir up them bees was sinful—that's what it was. It
was sinful. And the bees they swarmed on Brer Bear's head, til before he
could take it out of the hole it was done swell up bigger than that
dinner-pot,
har1880.2007.001.0139.jpg
en dar he swung, en ole Brer Rabbit, he dance
'roun' en sing:
and there he swung, and old Brer Rabbit, he dance around and
sing:
"But dar ole Brer B'ar hung, en ef his head ain't swunk, I speck he hangin' dar yit—dat w'at I speck." "But there old Brer Bear hung, and if his head ain't swunk, I expect he hanging there yet—that what I expect."
XXIX.
MR. FOX GETS INTO SERIOUS BUSINESS.
"It turn out one time," said Uncle Remus, grinding some crumbs of tobacco between the palms of his hands, preparatory to enjoying his usual smoke after supper— "hit turn out one time dat Brer Rabbit make so free wid de man's collard-patch dat de man he tuck'n sot a trap fer ole Brer Rabbit." "it turn out one time that Brer Rabbit make so free with the man's collard-patch that the man he took and set a trap for old Brer Rabbit."
"Which man was that, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy.
"Des a man, honey. Dat's all. Dat's all I knows—des wunner dese yer mans w'at you see trollopin 'roun' eve'y day. Nobody ain't never year w'at his name is, en ef dey did dey kep' de news mighty close fum me. Ef dish yer man is bleedzd fer ter have a name, den I'm done, kaze you'll hatter go fudder dan me. Ef you bleedzd ter know mo' dan w'at I duz, den you'll hatter hunt up some er deze yer niggers w'at's sprung up sence I commence fer ter shed my ha'r." "Just a man, honey. That's all. That's all I knows—just one of these here mans what you see trolloping around every day. Nobody ain't never hear what his name is, and if they did they kept the news mighty close from me. If this here Man is bleedzd for to have a name, then I'm done, 'cause you'll have to go further than me. If you bleedzd to know more than what I does, then you'll have to hunt up some of these here niggers what's sprung up since I commence for to shed my hair."
har1880.2007.001.0140.jpg
"Well, I just thought, Uncle Remus," said the little boy, in a tone remarkable for self-depreciation, "that the man had a name."
"Tooby sho," "To be sure," replied the old man, with unction, puffing away at his pipe. "Co'se. Dat w'at make I say w'at I duz. Dish yer man mout a had a name, en den ag'in he moutn't. He mout er bin name Slip-shot Sam, en he mouter bin name ole One-eye Riley, w'ich ef 'twuz hit ain't bin handed roun' ter me. But dis yer man, he in de tale, en w'at we gwine do wid 'im? Dat's de p'int, kase w'en I git ter huntin' 'roun' 'mong my 'membunce atter dish yer Mister W'atyoumaycollum's name, she ain't dar. Now den, less des call 'im Mr. Man en let 'im go at dat." "Course. That what make I say what I does. This here man might have had a name, and then again he mightn't. He might have been name Slip-shot Sam, and he might have been name old One-eye Riley, which if it was it ain't been handed round to me. But this here man, he in the tale, and what we going do with him? That's the point, 'cause when I get to hunting around among my rememberance after this here Mister Whatyoumaycallhim's name, she ain't there. Now then, lets just call him Mr. Man and let him go at that."
The silence of the little boy gave consent.
"One time," said Uncle Remus, carefully taking up the thread of the story where it had been dropped, "hit turn out dat Brer Rabbit bin makin' so free wid Mr. Man's greens en truck dat Mr. Man, he tuck'n sot a trap fer Brer Rabbit, en Brer Rabbit he so greedy dat he tuck'n walk right spang in it 'fo' he know hisse'f. Well, 'twa'n't long 'fo' yer come Mr. Man, broozin' 'roun', en he ain't no sooner see ole Brer Rabbit dan he smack his han's tergedder en holler out: "it turn out that Brer Rabbit been making so free with Mr. Man's greens and truck that Mr. Man, he took and set a trap for Brer Rabbit, and Brer Rabbit he so greedy that he took and walk right spang in it before he know hisself. Well, it wasn't long before here come Mr. Man, broozin' around, and he ain't no sooner see old Brer Rabbit than he smack his hands together and holler out:
"'Youer nice feller, you is! Yer you bin gobblin' up my green truck, en now you tryin' ter tote off my trap. Youer mighty nice chap—dat's w'at you is! But now dat I got you, I'll des 'bout settle wid you fer de ole en de new.' "'You're nice fellow, you is! Here you been gobbling up my green truck, and now you trying to tote off my trap. You're mighty nice chap—that's what you is! But now that I got you, I'll just about settle with you for the old and the new.'
"En wid dat, Mr. Man, he go off, he did, down in de
bushes atter han'ful er switches. Ole Brer Rabbit he ain't
"And with that, Mr. Man, he go off, he did, down in the bushes after
handful of switches. Old Brer Rabbit he ain't
har1880.2007.001.0141.jpg
sayin' nuthin', but he feelin' mighty lonesome, en
he sot dar lookin' like eve'y minnit wuz gwineter be de nex'. En w'iles
Mr. Man wuz off prepa'r'n his bresh-broom, who should come p'radin' 'long
but Brer Fox? Brer Fox make a great 'miration, he did, 'bout de fix w'at
he fine Brer Rabbit in, but Brer Rabbit he make like he fit ter kill
hisse'f laffin', en he up'n tell Brer Fox, he did, dat Miss Meadows's
fokes want 'im ter go down ter der house in 'tennunce on a weddin', en he
'low w'ich he couldn't, en dey 'low how he could, en den bimeby dey
take'n tie 'im dar w'iles dey go atter de preacher, so he be dar w'en dey
come back. En mo'n dat, Brer Rabbit up'n tell Brer Fox dat his chillun's
mighty low wid de fever, en he bleedzd ter go atter some pills fer'm, en
he ax Brer Fox fer ter take his place en go down ter Miss Meadows's en
have nice time wid de gals. Brer Fox, he in fer dem kinder pranks, en
'twa'n't no time 'fo' Brer Rabbit had ole Brer Fox harness up dar in his
place, en den he make like he got ter make 'as'e en git de pills fer dem
sick chilluns. Brer Rabbit wa'n't mo'n out er sight 'fo' yer come Mr. Man
wid a han'ful er hick'ries, but w'en he see Brer Fox tied up dar, he look
like he 'stonished.
saying nothing, but he feeling mighty lonesome, and he sat there
looking like every minute was going to be the next. And while Mr. Man was
off preparing his brush-broom, who should come parading along but Brer
Fox? Brer Fox make a great admiration, he did, about the fix what he find
Brer Rabbit in, but Brer Rabbit he make like he fit to kill hisself
laughing, and he up and tell Brer Fox, he did, that Miss Meadows's folks
want him to go down to their house in attendance on a wedding and he
allow which he couldn't, and they allow how he could, and then by and by
they take and tie him there while they go after the preacher, so he be
there when they come back. And more than that, Brer Rabbit up and tell
Brer Fox that his children mighty low with the fever, and he
bleedzd to go after some pills for them, and he
ask Brer Fox for to take his place and go down to Miss
Meadows's and have nice time with the gals. Brer Fox, he in for them kind
of pranks, and it wasn't no time before Brer Rabbit had old Brer Fox
harness up there in his place, and then he make like he got to make
'as'e and get the pills for them sick children. Brer
Rabbit wasn't more than out of sight before here come Mr. Man with a
handful of hickories, but when he see Brer Fox tied up there, he look
like he astonished.
"'Heyo!' sez Mr. Man, sezee, 'you done change color, en you done got bigger, en yo' tail done grow out. W'at kin'er w'atzyname is you, ennyhow?' sezee. "'Heyo!' says Mr. Man, says he, 'you done change color, and you done got bigger, and your tail done grow out. What kind of what's-his-name is you, anyhow?' says he.
"Brer Fox, he stay still, en Mr. Man, he talk on: Brer Fox, he stay still, and Mr. Man, he talk on:
"'Hit's mighty big luck,'
sezee, 'ef w'en I ketch de chap w'at nibble my greens,
likewise I ketch de feller w'at gnyaw my goose,' sezee, en wid dat
he let inter Brer Fox wid de hick'ries, en de way he play rap-jacket wuz
a caution
"'It's mighty big luck,' says he, 'if when I catch the chap what nibble my greens, likewise I catch the
fellow what gnaw my goose,' says he, and with that he let into
Brer Fox with the hickories, and the way he play rap-jacket was a
caution
har1880.2007.001.0142.jpg
ter de naberhood. Brer Fox, he juk en he jump, en
he squeal en he squall, but Mr. Man, he shower down on 'im, he did, like
fightin' a red was'-nes'."
to the neighborhood. Brer Fox, he jerk and he jump, and he squeal and
he squall, but Mr. Man, he shower down on him, he did, like fighting a
red wasp-nest."
The little boy laughed, and Uncle Remus supplemented this endorsement of his descriptive powers with a most infectious chuckle.
"Bimeby," "By and by," continued the old man, "de switches, dey got frazzle out, en Mr. Man, he put out atter mo', en w'en he done got fa'rly outer yearin', Brer Rabbit, he show'd up, he did, kaze he des bin hidin' out in de bushes lis'nin' at de racket, en he 'low hit mighty funny dat Miss Meadows ain't come 'long, kaze he done bin down ter de doctor house, en dat's fudder dan de preacher, yit. Brer Rabbit make like he hurr'in' on home, but Brer Fox, he open up, he did, en he say: "the switches, they got frazzle out, and Mr. Man, he put out after more, and when he done got fairly out of hearing, Brer Rabbit, he showed up, he did, 'cause he just been hiding out in the bushes listening at the racket, and he allow it mighty funny that Miss Meadows ain't come along, 'cause he done been down to the doctor house, and that's further than the preacher, yet. Brer Rabbit make like he hurrying on home, but Brer Fox, he open up, he did, and he say:
"'I thank you fer ter tu'n me loose, Brer Rabbit, en I'll be 'blije,' sezee, 'kaze you done tie me up so tight dat it make my head swim, en I don't speck I'd las' fer ter git ter Miss Meadows's,' sezee. "'I thank you for to turn me loose, Brer Rabbit, and I'll be obliged,' says he, ''cause you done tie me up so tight that it make my head swim, and I don't expect I'd last for to get to Miss Meadows's,' says he.
"Brer Rabbit, he sot down sorter keerless like, en begin fer ter scratch one year like a man studyin' 'bout sump'n. "Brer Rabbit, he sat down sort of careless like, and begin for to scratch one ear like a man studying about something.
"'Dat's so, Brer Fox,' sezee, 'you duz look sorter stove up. Look like sump'n bin onkoamin' yo' ha'rs,' sezee. "'That's so, Brer Fox,' says he, 'you does look sort of stove up. Look like something been uncombing your hairs,' says he.
"Brer Fox ain't sayin' nothin', but Brer Rabbit, he keep on talkin': "Brer Fox ain't saying nothing, but Brer Rabbit, he keep on talking:
"'Dey ain't no bad feelin's 'twix' us, is dey, Brer Fox? Kaze ef dey is, I ain't got no time fer ter be tarryin' 'roun' yer.' "'They ain't no bad feelings betwixt us, is they, Brer Fox? 'Cause if they is, I ain't got no time for to be tarrying around here.'
"Brer Fox say w'ich he don't have no onfrennelness,
en
"Brer Fox say which he don't have no unfriendliness, and
har1880.2007.001.0143.jpg
wid dat Brer Rabbit cut Brer Fox loose des in time
fer ter hear Mr. Man w'isserlin up his dogs, en one went one way en de
udder went nudder."
with that Brer Rabbit cut Brer Fox loose just in time for to hear Mr.
Man whistling up his dogs, and one went one way and the other went
another."
XXX.
HOW MR. RABBIT SUCCEEDED IN RAISING A DUST.
"In dem times,"
"In them times,"
said Uncle Remus, gazing admiringly at himself in a fragment of
looking-glass,
"Brer Rabbit, en Brer Fox, en Brer Coon, en dem
yuther beas's go co'tin' en sparklin' 'roun' de naberhood mo' samer dan
folks. 'Twan't no 'Lemme a hoss,' ner 'Fetch me my buggy,' but dey des
up'n lit out en tote deyse'f. Dar's ole Brer Fox, he des wheel 'roun' en
fetch his flank one swipe wid 'is tongue en he'd be koam up; en Brer
Rabbit, he des spit on his han' en twis' it 'roun' 'mongst de roots un
his years en his ha'r'd be roach. Dey wuz dat flirtashus,"
"Brer Rabbit, and Brer Fox, and Brer Coon, and them other beasts go
courting and sparkling around the neighborhood more samer than folks. It
wasn't no 'Lemme a horse,' nor 'Fetch me my
buggy,' but they just up and lit out and tote theyself. There's old Brer
Fox, he just wheel around and fetch his flank one swipe with his tongue
and he'd be comb up; and Brer Rabbit, he just spit on his hand and twist
it around amongst the roots of his ears and his hair'd be roach. They was
that flirtatious,"
continued the old man, closing one eye at his image in the glass,
"dat Miss Meadows en de gals don't see no peace fum
one week een' ter de udder. Chuseday wuz same as Sunday, en Friday wuz
same as Chuseday, en hit come down ter dat pass dat w'en Miss Meadows 'ud
have chicken-fixins fer dinner, in 'ud drap Brer Fox en Brer Possum, en
w'en she'd have fried greens in 'ud pop ole Brer Rabbit, twel 'las' Miss
Meadows, she tuck'n tell de gals dat she be dad-blame ef she gwineter
keep no tavvun. So dey fix it up 'mong
"that Miss Meadows and the gals don't see no peace from one week end to
the other. Tuesday was same as Sunday, and Friday was same as Tuesday,
and it come down to that pass that when Miss Meadows would have
chicken-fixings for dinner, in would drop Brer Fox and Brer Possum, and
when she'd have fried greens in would pop old Brer Rabbit, til
'las' Miss Meadows, she took and tell the gals that
she be dad-blame if she going to keep no tavern. So they fix it up
among
har1880.2007.001.0144.jpg
deyse'f, Miss Meadows en de gals did, dat de nex'
time de gents call dey'd gin um a game. De gents, dey wuz a
theyself, Miss Meadows and the gals did, that the next time the gents
call they'd give them a game. The gents, they was a
co'tin, but Miss Meadows, she don't wanter marry
none un um, en needer duz de gals, en likewise dey don't wanter
courting, but Miss Meadows, she don't want to marry none of them, and
neither does the gals, and likewise they don't want to
har1880.2007.001.0145.jpg
have um pester'n 'roun'. Las', one Chuseday, Miss
Meadows, she tole um dat ef dey come down ter her house de nex' Sat'day
evenin', de whole caboodle un um 'ud go down de road a piece, whar der
wuz a big flint rock, en de man w'at could take a sludge-hammer en knock
de dus' out'n dat rock, he wuz de man w'at 'ud git de pick er de gals.
Dey all say dey gwine do it, but ole Brer Rabbit, he crope off whar der
wuz a cool place under some jimson weeds, en dar he sot wukkin his mind
how he gwineter git dus' out'n dat rock. Bimeby, w'ile he wuz a settin'
dar, up he jump en crack his heels tergedder en sing out:
have them pestering around. Last, one Tuesday, Miss Meadows, she told
them that if they come down to her house the next Saturday evening, the
whole caboodle of them would go down the road a piece, where there was a
big flint rock, and the man what could take a sledge-hammer and knock the
dust out of that rock, he was the man what would get the pick of the
gals. They all say they going do it, but old Brer Rabbit, he crept off
where there was a cool place under some jimson weeds, and
there he sat working his mind how he going to get dust out of that rock.
By and by, while he was a setting there, up he jump and crack his heels
together and sing out:
"Where was the Rabbit?" the little boy asked.
"Youk'n put yo' 'pennunce in ole Brer Rabbit,"
"You can put your dependence in old Brer Rabbit,"
the old man replied, with a chuckle.
"He wuz dere, but he shuffle up kinder late, kaze
w'en Miss Meadows en de ballunce un um done gone down ter de place, Brer
Rabbit, he crope 'roun' ter de ash-hopper, en fill Brer Coon slippers
full er ashes, en den he tuck'n put um on en march off. He got dar atter
'w'ile, en soon's Miss Meadows en de gals seed 'im, dey up'n giggle, en
make a great 'miration kaze Brer Rabbit got on slippers. Brer Fox, he so
smart, he
"He was there, but he shuffle up kind of late, 'cause when Miss Meadows
and the balance of them done gone down to the place, Brer Rabbit, he
crept around to the ash-hopper, and fill Brer Coon slippers full of
ashes, and then he took and put them on and march off. He got there after
awhile, and soon as Miss Meadows and the gals seed him, they up and
giggle, and make a great admiration 'cause Brer Rabbit got on slippers.
Brer Fox, he so smart, he
har1880.2007.001.0146.jpg
holler out, he did, en say he lay Brer Rabbit got
de groun'-eatch, but Brer Rabbit, he sorter shet one eye, he did, en say,
sezee:
holler out, he did, and say he lay Brer Rabbit got the
groun'-eatch, but Brer Rabbit, he sort of shut one eye, he
did, and say, says he:
"'I bin so useter ridin'
hoss-back, ez deze ladies knows, dat I'm gittin' sorter
tender-footed;' en dey don't hear much mo' fum Brer Fox dat day,
kaze he 'member how Brer Rabbit done bin en rid him; en hit 'uz des 'bout
much ez Miss Meadows en de gals could do fer ter keep der snickers fum
gittin' up a 'sturbance 'mong de congergashun. But, never mine dat, old
Brer Rabbit, he wuz dar, en he so brash dat leetle mo' en he'd er grab up
de sludge-hammer en er open up de racket 'fo' ennybody gun de word; but
Brer Fox, he shove Brer Rabbit out'n de way en pick up de sludge hisse'f.
Now den,"
"'I been so use to riding horse-back, as these
ladies knows, that I'm getting sort of tender-footed;' and they
don't hear much more from Brer Fox that day, 'cause he remember how Brer
Rabbit done been and rode him; and it was just about much as Miss Meadows
and the gals could do for to keep their snickers from getting up a
disturbance among the congregation. But, never mind that, old Brer
Rabbit, he was there, and he so brash that little more and he'd have grab
up the sledge-hammer and have open up the racket before anybody
give the word; but Brer Fox, he shove Brer Rabbit out of
the way and pick up the sledge hisself. Now then,"
continued the old man, with pretty much the air of one who had been the
master of similar ceremonies,
"de progance wuz dish yer: Eve'y gent wer ter have
th'ee licks at de rock, en de gent w'at fetch de dus' he wer de one w'at
gwineter take de pick er de gals. Ole Brer Fox, he grab de sludge-hammer,
he did, en he come down on de rock—blim! No dus'
ain't come. Den he draw back en down he come ag'in—blam! No dus' ain't come. Den he spit in his han's, en give 'er
a big swing en down she come—ker-blap! En yit no
dus' ain't flew'd. Den Brer Possum he make triul, en Brer Coon, en all de
ballunce un um 'cep' Brer Tarrypin, en he 'low dat he got a crick in his
neck. Den Brer Rabbit, he grab holt er de sludge, en he lipt up in de a'r
en come down on de rock all at de same time—pow!—en de ashes, dey flew'd up so, dey did, dat Brer Fox, he
tuck'n had a sneezin' spell,
"the progance was this here: Every gent were to
have three licks at the rock, and the gent what fetch the dust he were
the one what going to take the pick of the gals. Old Brer Fox, he grab
the sledge-hammer, he did, and he come down on the rock—blim! No dust ain't come. Then he draw back and
down he come again—blam! No dust ain't come. Then
he spit in his hands, and give her a big swing and down she come—ker-blap! And yet no dust ain't
flewed. Then Brer Possum he make trial, and Brer
Coon, and all the balance of them except Brer Terrapin, and he allow that
he got a crick in his neck. Then Brer Rabbit, he grab hold of the sledge,
and he leaped up in the air and come down on the rock all at the same
time—pow!—and the ashes, they
flewed up so, they did, that Brer Fox, he took and had a
sneezing spell,
har1880.2007.001.0147.jpg
en Miss Meadows en de gals dey up'n koff. Th'ee
times Brer Rabbit jump up en crack his heels tergedder en come down wid
de sludge-hammer—ker-blam!—en eve'y time he jump
up, he holler out:
and Miss Meadows and the gals they up and cough. Three times Brer
Rabbit jump up and crack his heels together and come down with the
sledge-hammer—ker-blam!—and every time he jump
up, he holler out:
"'Stan' fudder, ladies! Yer come de dus'!' en sho nuff, de dus' come. "'Stand further, ladies! Here come the dust!' and sure enough, the dust come.
"Leas'ways," "Leastways," continued Uncle Remus, "Brer Rabbit got one er de gals, en dey had a weddin' en a big infa'r." "Brer Rabbit got one of the gals, and they had a wedding and a big affair."
"Which of the girls did the Rabbit marry?" asked the little boy, dubiously.
"I did year tell un 'er name," "I did hear tell of her name," replied the old man, with a great affectation of interest, "but look like I done gone en fergit it off'n my mine. Ef I don't disremember," "but look like I done gone and forget it off of my mind. If I don't disremember," he continued, "hit wuz Miss Molly Cottontail, en I speck we better let it go at dat." "it was Miss Molly Cottontail, and I expect we better let it go at that."
XXXI.
A PLANTATION WITCH.
The next time the little boy got permission to call upon Uncle Remus, the old man was sitting in his door, with his elbows on his knees and his face buried in his hands, and he appeared to be in great trouble.
"What's the matter, Uncle Remus?" the youngster asked.
"Nuff de matter, honey—mo' dan dey's enny kyo fer.
"Enough the matter, honey—more than they's any cure for.
har1880.2007.001.0148.jpg
Ef dey ain't some quare gwines on 'roun' dis place
I ain't name Remus."
If they ain't some queer goings on around this place I ain't name
Remus."
The serious tone of the old man caused the little boy to open his eyes. The moon, just at its full, cast long, vague, wavering shadows in front of the cabin. A colony of tree-frogs somewhere in the distance were treating their neighbors to a serenade, but to the little boy it sounded like a chorus of lost and long-forgotten whistlers. The sound was wherever the imagination chose to locate it—to the right, to the left, in the air, on the ground, far away or near at hand, but always dim and always indistinct. Something in Uncle Remus's tone exactly fitted all these surroundings, and the child nestled closer to the old man.
"Yasser," "Yes sir," continued Uncle Remus, with an ominous sigh and a mysterious shake of the head, "ef dey ain't some quare gwines on in dish yer naberhood, den I'm de ball-headest creetur 'twix' dis en nex' Jinawerry wus a year 'go, w'ich I knows I ain't. Dat's what." "if they ain't some queer goings on in this here neighborhood, then I'm the ball-headest creature betwixt this and next January was a year ago, which I knows I ain't. That's what."
"What is it, Uncle Remus?"
"I know Mars John bin drivin' Cholly sorter hard terday, en I say ter myse'f dat I'd drap 'roun' 'bout dus' en fling nudder year er corn in de troff en kinder gin 'im a techin' up wid de kurrier-koam; en bless grashus! I ain't bin in de lot mo'n a minnit 'fo' I seed sump'n wuz wrong wid de hoss, and sho' nuff dar wuz his mane full er witch-stirrups." "I know Master John been driving Charlie sort of hard today, and I say to myself that I'd drop around about dusk and fling another ear of corn in the trough and kind of give him a touching up with the currier-comb; and bless gracious! I ain't been in the lot more than a minute before I seed something was wrong with the horse, and sure enough there was his mane full of witch-stirrups."
"Full of what, Uncle Remus?"
"Full er witch-stirrups, honey. Ain't you seed no
witch-stirrups? Well, w'en you see two stran' er ha'r tied
"Full of witch-stirrups, honey. Ain't you seen no witch-stirrups? Well,
when you see two strand of hair tied
har1880.2007.001.0149.jpg
tergedder in a hoss' mane, dar you see a
witch-stirrup, en, mo'n dat, dat hoss done bin rid by um."
together in a horse's mane, there you see a witch-stirrup, and, more
than that, that horse done been rode by them."
"Do you reckon they have been riding Charley?" inquired the little boy.
"Co'se, honey. Tooby sho dey is. W'at else dey bin doin'?" "Course, honey. To be sure they is. What else they been doing?"
"Did you ever see a witch, Uncle Remus?"
"Dat ain't needer yer ner dar. W'en I see coon track in de branch, I know de coon bin 'long dar." "That ain't neither here nor there. When I see coon track in the branch, I know the coon been along there."
The argument seemed unanswerable, and the little boy asked, in a confidential tone:
"Uncle Remus, what are witches like?"
"Dey comes diffunt,"
"They comes different,"
responded the cautious old darkey.
"Dey comes en dey cunjus fokes. Squinch-owl holler
eve'y time he see a witch, en w'en you hear de dog howlin' in de middle
er de night, one un um's mighty ap' ter be prowlin' 'roun'. Cunjun fokes
kin tell a witch de minnit dey lays der eyes on it, but dem w'at ain't
cunjun, hit's mighty hard ter tell w'en dey see one, kase dey might come
in de 'pearunce un a cow en all kinder beas's. I ain't bin useter no
cunjun myse'f, but I bin livin' long nuff fer ter know w'en you meets up
wid a big black cat in de middle er de road, wid yaller eyeballs, dars
yo' witch fresh fum de Ole Boy. En, fuddermo', I know dat 'tain't proned
inter no dogs fer ter ketch de rabbit w'at use in a berryin'-groun'. Dey
er de mos' ongodlies' creeturs w'at you ever laid eyes on,"
"They comes and they conjures folks.
Squinch-owl holler every time he see a witch, and when you hear the dog
howling in the middle of the night, one of them's mighty apt to be
prowling around. Cunjun folks can tell a witch the
minute they lays their eyes on it, but them what ain't
cunjun, it's mighty hard to tell when they see one,
'cause they might come in the appearance of a cow and all kind of beasts.
I ain't been use to no cunjun myself, but I been
living long enough for to know when you meets up with a big black cat in
the middle of the road, with yellow eyeballs, there's your witch fresh
from the Ole Boy. And, furthermore, I know that it ain't
proned into no dogs for to catch the rabbit what
use in a burying-ground. They are the most ungodliest creatures what you
ever laid eyes on,"
continued Uncle Remus, with unction.
"Down dar in Putmon County yo' Unk Jeems, he make
like he gwineter ketch wunner dem dar graveyard rabbits. Sho
"Down there in Putnam County your Uncle James, he make like he going to
catch one of them there graveyard rabbits. Sure
har1880.2007.001.0150.jpg
nuff, out he goes, en de dogs ain't no mo'n got ter
de place fo' up jump de ole rabbit right 'mong um, en atter runnin'
'roun' a time or two, she skip right up ter Mars Jeems, en Mars Jeems, he
des put de gun-bairl right on 'er en lammed aloose. Hit tored up de
groun' all 'roun', en de dogs, dey rush up, but dey wan't no rabbit dar;
but bimeby Mars Jeems, he seed de dogs tuckin' der tails 'tween der legs,
en he look up, en dar wuz de rabbit caperin' 'roun' on a toomstone, en
wid dat Mars Jeems say he sorter feel like de time done come w'en yo'
gran'ma was 'specktin' un him home, en he call off de dogs en put out.
But dem wuz ha'nts. Witches is deze yer kinder fokes wat kin drap der
body en change inter a cat en a wolf en all kinder creeturs."
enough, out he goes, and the dogs ain't no more than got to the place
before up jump the old rabbit right among them, and after running around
a time or two, she skip right up to Master James, and Master James, he
just put the gun-barrel right on her and lammed aloose. It
tored up the ground all around, and the dogs, they rush up, but they
wasn't no rabbit there; but by and by Master James, he seed the dogs
tucking their tails between their legs, and he look up, and there was the
rabbit capering around on a tombstone, and with that Master James say he
sort of feel like the time done come when your grandma was expecting of
him home, and he call off the dogs and put out. But them was
haunts. Witches is these here kind of folks what can
drop their body and change into a cat and a wolf and all kind of
creatures."
"Papa says there ain't any witches," the little boy interrupted.
"Mars John ain't live long ez I is," "Master John ain't live long as I is," said Uncle Remus, by way of comment. "He ain't bin broozin' 'roun' all hours er de night en day. I know'd a nigger w'ich his brer wuz a witch, kaze he up'n tole me how he tuck'n kyo'd 'im; en he kyo'd 'im good, mon." "He ain't been broozin' around all hours of the night and day. I knowed a nigger which his brer was a witch, 'cause he up and told me how he took and cured him; and he cured him good, man."
"How was that?" inquired the little boy.
"Hit seem like," "It seem like," continued Uncle Remus, "dat witch fokes is got a slit in de back er de neck, en w'en dey wanter change derse'f, dey des pull de hide over der head same ez if 'twuz a shut, en dar dey is." "that witch folks is got a slit in the back of the neck, and when they want to change theirself, they just pull the hide over their head same as if it was a shirt, and there they is."
"Do they get out of their skins?" asked the little boy, in an awed tone.
"Tooby sho, honey. You see yo' pa pull his shut
off? Well, dat des 'zackly de way dey duz. But dish yere nigger
"To be sure, honey. You see your pa pull his shirt off? Well, that just
exactly the way they does. But this here nigger
har1880.2007.001.0151.jpg
w'at I'm tellin' you 'bout, he kyo'd his brer de
ve'y fus pass he made at him. Hit got so dat fokes in de settlement
didn't have no peace. De chilluns 'ud wake up in de mawnins wid der ha'r
tangle up, en wid scratches on um like dey bin thoo a brier-patch, twel
bimeby one day de nigger he 'low dat he'd set up dat night en keep one
eye on his brer; en sho' nuff dat night, des ez de chickens wuz crowin'
fer twelve, up jump de brer an pull off his skin en sail out'n de house
in de shape un a bat, en w'at duz de nigger do but grab up de hide, en
turn it wrongsud-out'ards en sprinkle it wid salt. Den he lay down en
watch fer ter see w'at de news wuz gwineter be. Des 'fo' day yer come a
big black cat in de do', en de nigger git up, he did, en druv her away.
Bimeby, yer come a big black dog snuffin' roun', en de nigger up wid a
chunk en lammed 'im side er de head. Den a squinch-owl lit on de koam er
de house, en de nigger jam de shovel in de fier en make 'im flew away.
Las', yer come a great big black wolf wid his eyes shinin' like fier
coals, en he grab de hide and rush out. 'Twa'n't long 'fo' de nigger year
his brer holler'n en squallin', en he tuck a light, he did, en went out,
en dar wuz his brer des a waller'n on de groun' en squirmin' 'roun', kaze
de salt on de skin wuz stingin' wuss'n ef he had his britches lineded wid
yaller-jackets. By nex' mawnin' he got so he could sorter shuffle 'long,
but he gun up cunjun, en ef dere wuz enny mo' witches in dat settlement
dey kep' mighty close, en dat nigger he ain't skunt hisse'f no mo' not
endurin' er my 'membunce."
what I'm telling you about, he cured his brother the very first pass he
made at him. It got so that folks in the settlement didn't have no peace.
The children would wake up in the mornings with their hair tangle up, and
with scratches on them like they been through a briar-patch, til by and
by one day the nigger he allow that he'd set up that night and keep one
eye on his brother; and sure enough that night, just as the chickens was
crowing for twelve, up jump the brother and pull off his skin and sail
out of the house in the shape of a bat, and what does the nigger do but
grab up the hide, and turn it
wrongside-outwards
and sprinkle it with salt. Then he lay down and watch for to see what the
news was going to be. Just before day here come a big black cat in the
door, and the nigger get up, he did, and drove her away. By and by, here
come a big black dog round, and the nigger up with
a chunk and lammed him side of the head. Then a squinch-owl
lit on the comb of the house, and the nigger jam the shovel in the fire
and make him flew away. Last, here come a great big black wolf with his
eyes shining like fire coals, and he grab the hide and rush out. It
wasn't long before the nigger hear his brother hollering and squalling
and he took a light, he did, and went out, and there was his brother just
a wallowing on the ground and squirming around, 'cause the salt on the
skin was stinging worse than if he had his britches
lineded with yellow-jackets. By next morning he got so
he could sort of shuffle along, but he gun up
cunjun, and if there was any more witches in that
settlement they kept mighty close, and that nigger he ain't
skunt hisself no more not enduring of my
rememberance."
The result of this was that Uncle Remus had to take
har1880.2007.001.0152.jpg
the
little boy by the hand and go with him to the "big house," which the old man was
not loath to do; and, when the child went to bed, he lay awake a long time
expecting an unseemly visitation from some mysterious source. It soothed him,
however, to hear the strong, musical voice of his sable patron, not very far away,
tenderly contending with a lusty tune; and to this accompaniment the little boy
dropped asleep:
XXXII.
"JACKY-MY-LANTERN."
Upon his next visit to Uncle Remus, the little boy was exceedingly anxious to know
more about witches, but the old man prudently refrained from exciting the
youngster's
har1880.2007.001.0153.jpg
imagination any further in that
direction. Uncle Remus had a board across his lap, and, armed with a mallet and a
shoe-knife, was engaged in making shoe-pegs.
"W'iles I wuz crossin' de branch des now," "While I was crossing the branch just now," he said, endeavoring to change the subject, "I come up wid a Jacky-my-lantern, en she wuz bu'nin' wuss'n a bunch er lightnin'-bugs, mon. I know'd she wuz a fixin' fer ter lead me inter dat quogmire down in de swamp, en I steer'd cle'r un 'er. Yasser. I did dat. You ain't never seed no Jacky-my-lantuns, is you, honey?" "I come up with a Jacky-my-lantern, and she was burning worse than a bunch of lightning-bugs, man. I knowed she was a fixing for to lead me into that quagmire down in the swamp, and I steered clear of her. Yes sir. I did that. You ain't never seen no Jacky-my-lanterns, is you, honey?"
The little boy never had, but he had heard of them, and he wanted to know what they were, and thereupon Uncle Remus proceeded to tell him.
"One time," said the old darkey, transferring his spectacles from his nose to the top of his head and leaning his elbows upon his peg-board, "dere wuz a blacksmif man, en dish yer blacksmif man, he tuck'n stuck closer by his dram dan he did by his bellus. Monday mawnin' he'd git on a spree, en all dat week he'd be on a spree, en de nex' Monday mawnin' he'd take a fresh start. Bimeby, one day, atter de blacksmif bin spreein' 'roun' en cussin' might'ly, he hear a sorter rustlin' fuss at de do', en in walk de Bad Man." "there was a blacksmith man, and this here blacksmith man, he took and stuck closer by his dram than he did by his bellows. Monday morning he'd get on a spree, and all that week he'd be on a spree, and the next Monday morning he'd take a fresh start. By and by, one day, after the blacksmith been spreeing around and cussing mightily, he hear a sort of rustling fuss at the door, and in walk the Bad Man."
"Who, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked.
"De Bad Man, honey; de Ole Boy hisse'f right fresh
from de ridjun w'at you year Miss Sally readin' 'bout. He done hide his
hawns, en his tail, en his hoof, en he come dress up like w'ite fokes. He
tuck off his hat en he bow, en den he tell de blacksmif who he is, en dat
he done come
"The Bad Man, honey; the Old Boy hisself right fresh from the
ridjun what you hear Miss Sally reading about. He done
hide his horns, and his tail, and his hoof, and he come dress up like
white folks. He took off his hat and he bow, and then he tell the
blacksmith who he is, and that he done come
har1880.2007.001.0154.jpg
atter 'im. Den de blacksmif, he gun ter cry en beg,
en he beg so hard en he cry so loud dat de Bad Man say he make a trade
wid 'im. At de een' er one year de sperit er de blacksmif wuz to be
his'n, en endurin' er dat time de blacksmif mus' put in his hottes' licks
in de intruss er de Bad Man, en den he put a spell on de cheer de
blacksmif was settin' in, en on his sludge-hammer. De man w'at sot in de
cheer couldn't git up less'n de blacksmif let 'im, en de man w'at pick up
de sludge 'ud hatter keep on knockin' wid it twel de blacksmif say quit;
en den he gun 'im money plenty, en off he put.
after him. Then the blacksmith, he begun to cry and beg, and he beg so
hard and he cry so loud that the Bad Man say he make a trade with him. At
the end of one year the spirit of the blacksmith was to be his, and
enduring of that time the blacksmith must put in his hottest licks in the
intruss of the Bad Man, and then he put a
spell on the chair the blacksmith was setting in, and on his
sledge-hammer. The man what sat in the chair couldn't get up unless the
blacksmith let him, and the man what pick up the sledge would have to
keep on knocking with it til the blacksmith say quit; and then he
give him money plenty, and off he put.
"De blacksmif, he sail in fer ter have his fun, en
he have so much dat he done clean forgot 'bout his contrack, but bimeby,
one day he look down de road, en dar he see de Bad Man comin', en den he
know'd de year wuz out. W'en de Bad Man got in de do', de blacksmif wuz
poundin' 'way at a hoss-shoe, but he wa'n't so bizzy dat he didn't ax 'im
in. De Bad Man sorter do like he ain't got no time fer ter tarry, but de
blacksmif say he got some little jobs dat he bleedzd ter finish up, en
den he ax de Bad Man fer ter set down a minnit; en de Bad Man, he tuck'n
sot down, en he sot in dat cheer w'at he done conju'd, en, co'se, dar he
wuz. Den de blacksmif, he 'gun ter poke fun at de Bad Man, en he ax him
don't he want a dram, en won't he hitch his cheer up little nigher de
fier, en de Bad Man, he beg en he beg, but 'twan't doin' no good, kase de
blacksmif 'low dat he gwineter keep 'im dar twel he promus dat he let 'im
off one year mo', en, sho nuff, de Bad Man promus dat ef de blacksmif let
'im up he give 'im a n'er showin'. So den de
"The blacksmith, he sail in for to have his fun, and he have so much
that he done clean forgot about his contract, but by and by, one day he
look down the road, and there he see the Bad Man coming, and then he
knowed the year was out. When the Bad Man got in the door, the blacksmith
was pounding away at a horse-shoe, but he wasn't so busy that he didn't
ask him in. The Bad Man sort of do like he ain't got no time for to
tarry, but the blacksmith say he got some little jobs that he
bleedzd to finish up, and then he askthe Bad Man
for to set down a minute; and the Bad Man, he took and sat down, and he
sat in that chair what he done conjured, and, course, there he
was. Then the blacksmith, he begun to poke fun at the Bad Man, and he ask
him don't he want a dram, and won't he hitch his chair up little nigher
the fire, and the Bad Man, he beg and he beg, but it wasn't doing no
good, 'cause the blacksmith allow that he going to keep him there til he
promise that he let him off one year more, and, sure enough, the Bad Man
promise that if the blacksmith let him up he give him another showing. So
then the
har1880.2007.001.0155.jpg
blacksmif gun de wud, en de Bad Man sa'nter off
down de big road, settin' traps en layin' his progance fer ter ketch mo'
sinners.
blacksmith give the word, and the Bad Man saunter off down the big
road, setting traps and laying his progance for to catch more
sinners.
"De nex' year hit pass same like t'er one. At de 'p'inted time yer come de Ole Boy atter de blacksmif, but still de blacksmif had some jobs dat he bleedzd ter finish up, en he ax de Bad Man fer ter take holt er de sludge en he'p 'im out; en de Bad Man, he 'low dat r'er'n be disperlite, he don't keer ef he do hit 'er a biff er two; en wid dat he grab up de sludge, en dar he wuz 'gin, kase he done conju'd de sludge so dat whosomedever tuck 'er up can't put 'er down less'n de blacksmif say de wud. Dey perlaver'd dar, dey did, twel bimeby de Bad Man he up'n let 'im off n'er year. "The next year it pass same like the other one. At the appointed time here come the Ole Boy after the blacksmith, but still the blacksmith had some jobs that he bleedzd to finish up, and he ask the Bad Man for to take hold of the sledge and help him out; and the Bad Man, he allow that r'er'n be disperlite, he don't care if he do hit 'er a biff or two; and with that he grab up the sledge, and there he was again, 'cause he done conjured the sledge so that whosomedever took her up can't put her down unless the blacksmith say the word. They palavered there, they did, til by and by the Bad Man he up and let him off another year.
"Well, den, dat year pass same ez t'er one. Mont' in en mont' out dat man wuz rollin' in dram, en bimeby yer come de Bad Man. De blacksmif cry en he holler, en he rip 'roun' en t'ar his ha'r, but hit des like he didn't, kase de Bad Man grab 'im up en cram 'im in a bag en tote 'im off. W'iles dey wuz gwine 'long dey come up wid a passel er fokes w'at wuz havin' wunner deze yer fote er July bobbycues, en de Ole Boy, he 'low dat maybe he kin git some mo' game, en w'at do he do but jine in wid um. He jines in en he talk politics same like t'er fokes, twel bimeby dinner-time come 'roun', en dey ax 'im up, w'ich 'greed wid his stummuck, en he pozzit his bag underneed de table 'longside de udder bags w'at de hongry fokes'd brung. "Well, then, that year pass same as the other one. Month in and month out that man was rolling in dram, and by and by here come the Bad Man. The blacksmith cry and he holler, and he rip around and tear his hair, but it just like he didn't, 'cause the Bad Man grab him up and cram him in a bag and tote him off. While they was going along they come up with a passel of folks what was having one of these here fourth of July barbecues, and the Old Boy, he allow that maybe he can get some more game, and what do he do but join in with them. He joins in and he talk politics same like the other folks, til by and by dinner-time come around, and they ask him up, which agreed with his stomach, and he posited his bag underneath the table alongside the other bags what the hungry folks'd brung.
"No sooner did de blacksmif git back on de groun'
dan he 'gun ter wuk his way outer de bag. He crope out, he
"No sooner did the blacksmith get back on the ground than he begun to
work his way out of the bag. He crept out, he
har1880.2007.001.0156.jpg
did, en den he tuck'n change de bag. He tuck'n tuck
a n'er bag en lay it down whar dish yer bag wuz, en den he crope outer de
crowd en lay low in de underbresh.
did, and then he took and change the bag. He took and took another bag
and lay it down where this here bag was, and then he crept out of the
crowd and lay low in the underbrush.
"Las', w'en de time come fer ter go, de Ole Boy up wid his bag en slung her on his shoulder, en off he put fer de Bad Place. W'en he got dar he tuck'n drap de bag off'n his back en call up de imps, en dey des come a squallin' en a caperin', w'ich I speck dey mus' a bin hongry. Leas'ways dey des swawm'd 'roun', hollerin out: "Last, when the time come for to go, the Old Boy up with his bag and slung her on his shoulder, and off he put for the Bad Place. When he got there he took and drop the bag off of his back and call up the imps, and they just come a squalling and a capering, which I expect they must a been hungry. Leastways they just swarmed around, hollering out:
"'Daddy, w'at you brung—daddy, w'at you brung?' "'Daddy, what you brung—daddy, what you brung?'
"So den dey open de bag, en lo en beholes, out jump a big bull-dog, en de way he shuck dem little imps wuz a caution, en he kep' on gnyawin' un um twel de Ole Boy open de gate en tu'n 'im out." "So then they open the bag, and lo and behold, out jump a big bull-dog, and the way he shook them little imps was a caution, and he kept on gnawing on them til the Old Boy open the gate and turn him out."
"And what became of the blacksmith?" the little boy asked, as Uncle Remus paused to snuff the candle with his fingers.
"I'm drivin' on 'roun', honey. Atter 'long time, de blacksmif he tuck'n die, en w'en he go ter de Good Place de man at de gate dunner who he is, en he can't squeeze in. Den he go down ter de Bad Place, en knock. De Ole Boy, he look out, he did, en he know'd de blacksmif de minnit he laid eyes on 'im; but he shake his head en say, sezee: "I'm driving on around, honey. After 'long time, the blacksmith he took and die, and when he go to the Good Place the man at the gate don't know who he is, and he can't squeeze in. Then he go down to the Bad Place, and knock. The Old Boy, he look out, he did, and he knowed the blacksmith the minute he laid eyes on him; but he shake his head and say, says he:
"'You'll hatter skuze me, Brer Blacksmif, kase I dun had 'speunce 'longer you. You'll hatter go some'rs else ef you wanter raise enny racket,' sezee, en wid dut he shet de do'. "'You'll have to excuse me, Brer Blacksmith, 'cause I done had 'speunce along with you. You'll have to go somewheres else if you want to raise any racket,' says he, and with that he shut the door.
"En dey do say,"
"And they do say,"
continued Uncle Remus, with unction,
"dat sence dat day de blacksmif bin sorter huv'rin'
"that since that day the blacksmith been sort of hovering
har1880.2007.001.0157.jpg
'roun' 'twix' de heavens en de ye'th, en dark
nights he shine out so fokes call 'im Jacky-my-lantun. Dat's w'at dey
tells me. Hit may be wrong er't may be right, but dat's w'at I years."
around betwixt the heavens and the earth, and dark nights he shine out
so folks call him Jacky-my-lantern. That's what they tells me. It may be
wrong or it may be right, but that's what I hears."
XXXIII.
WHY THE NEGRO IS BLACK.
One night, while the little boy was watching Uncle Remus twisting and waxing some shoe-thread, he made what appeared to him to be a very curious discovery. He discovered that the palms of the old man's hands were as white as his own, and the fact was such a source of wonder that he at last made it the subject of remark. The response of Uncle Remus led to the earnest recital of a piece of unwritten history that must prove interesting to ethnologists.
"Tooby sho de pa'm er my han's w'ite, honey," "To be sure the palm of my hands white, honey," he quietly remarked; "en, w'en it come ter dat; dey wuz a time w'en all de w'ite folks 'uz black—blacker dan me, kaze I done bin yer so long dat I bin sorter bleach out." "and, when it come to that; they was a time when all the white folks was black—blacker than me, 'cause I done been here so long that I been sort of bleach out."
The little boy laughed. He thought Uncle Remus was making him the victim of one of his jokes; but the youngster was never more mistaken. The old man was serious. Nevertheless, he failed to rebuke the ill-timed mirth of the child, appearing to be altogether engrossed in his work. After a while he resumed:
har1880.2007.001.0158.jpg
"Yasser. Fokes dunner w'at bin yit, let 'lone w'at gwinter be. Niggers is niggers now, but de time wuz w'en we 'uz all niggers tergedder." "Yes sir. Folks don't know what been yet, let alone what going to be. Niggers is niggers now, but the time was when we was all niggers together."
"When was that, Uncle Remus?"
"Way back yander. In dem times we 'uz all un us black; we 'uz all niggers tergedder, en 'cordin' ter all de 'counts w'at I years fokes 'uz gittin 'long 'bout ez well in dem days ez dey is now. But atter 'w'ile de news come dat dere wuz a pon' er water some'rs in de naberhood, w'ich ef dey'd git inter dey'd be wash off nice en w'ite, en den one un um, he fine de place en make er splunge inter de pon', en come out w'ite ez a town gal. En den, bless grashus! w'en de fokes seed it, dey make a break fer de pon', en dem w'at wuz de soopless, dey got in fus' en dey come out w'ite; en dem w'at wuz de nex' soopless, dey got in nex', en dey come out merlatters; en dey wuz sech a crowd un um dat dey mighty nigh use de water up, w'ich w'en dem yuthers come 'long, de morest dey could do wuz ter paddle about wid der foots en dabble in it wid der han's. Dem wuz de niggers, en down ter dis day dey ain't no w'ite 'bout a nigger 'ceppin de pa'ms er der han's en de soles er der foot." "Way back yonder. In them times we was all of us black; we was all niggers together, and acording to all the accounts what I hears folks was getting along about as well in them days as they is now. But after awhile the news come that there was a pond of water somewheres in the neighborhood, which if they'd get into they'd be wash off nice and white, and then one of them, he find the place and make her splunge into the pond, and come out white as a town gal. And then, bless gracious! when the folks seed it, they make a break for the pond, and them what was the soopless, they got in first and they come out white; and them what was the next soopless, they got in next, and they come out mulattoes; and they was such a crowd of them that they mighty nigh use the water up, which when them others come along, the morest they could do was to paddle about with their foots and dabble in it with their hands. Them was the niggers, and down to this day they ain't no white about a nigger excepting the palms of their hands and the soles of their foot."
The little boy seemed to be very much interested in this new account of the origin of races, and he made some further inquiries, which elicited from Uncle Remus the following additional particulars:
"De Injun en de Chinee got ter be 'counted 'long er de merlatter. I ain't seed no Chinee dat I knows un, but dey tells me dey er sorter 'twix' a brown en a brindle. Dey er all merlatters." "The Injun and the Chinese got to be accounted along er the mulatto. I ain't seen no Chinese that I knows of, but they tells me they are sort of betwixt a brown and a brindle. They are all mulattoes."
har1880.2007.001.0159.jpg
"But mamma says the Chinese have straight hair," the little boy suggested.
"Co'se, honey," "Course, honey," the old man unhesitatingly responded, "dem w'at git ter de pon' time nuff fer ter git der head in de water, de water hit onkink der ha'r. Hit bleedzd ter be dat away." "them what get to the pond time enough for to get their head in the water, the water it unkink their hair. It bleedzd to be that away."
XXXIV.
THE SAD FATE OF MR. FOX.
"Now, den," "Now, then," said Uncle Remus, with unusual gravity, as soon as the little boy, by taking his seat, announced that he was ready for the evening's entertainment to begin; "now, den, dish yer tale w'at I'm agwine ter gin you is de las' row er stumps, sho. Dish yer's whar ole Brer Fox los' his breff, en he ain't fine it no mo' down ter dis day." "now, then, this here tale what I'm a'going to give you is the last row of stumps, sure. This here's where old Brer Fox lost his breath, and he ain't find it no more down to this day."
"Did he kill himself, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked, with a curious air of concern.
"Hole on dar, honey!" "Hold on there, honey!" the old man exclaimed, with a great affectation of alarm; "hole on dar! Wait! Gimme room! I don't wanter tell you no story, en ef you keep shovin' me forrerd, I mout git some er de facks mix up 'mong deyse'f. You gotter gimme room en you gotter gimme time." "hold on there! Wait! Give me room! I don't want to tell you no story, and if you keep shoving me forward, I might get some of the facts mix up among theyself. You got to give me room and you got to give me time."
The little boy had no other premature questions to ask, and, after a pause, Uncle Remus resumed:
"Well, den, one day Brer Rabbit go ter Brer Fox
house,
"Well, then, one day Brer Rabbit go to Brer Fox house,
har1880.2007.001.0160.jpg
he did, en he put up mighty po' mouf. He say his
ole 'oman sick, en his chilluns cole, en de fier done gone out. Brer Fox,
he feel bad 'bout dis, en he tuck'n s'ply Brer Rabbit widder chunk er
fier. Brer Rabbit see Brer Fox cookin' some nice beef, en his mouf gun
ter water, but he take de fier, he did, en he put out to'rds home; but
present'y yer he come back, en he say de fier done gone out. Brer Fox
'low dat he want er invite ter dinner, but he don't say nuthin', en
bimeby Brer Rabbit he up'n say, sezee:
he did, and he put up mighty poor mouth. He say his old woman sick, and
his children cold, and the fire done gone out. Brer Fox, he feel bad
about this, and he took and supply Brer Rabbit with a chunk of fire. Brer
Rabbit see Brer Fox cooking some nice beef, and his mouth begun to water,
but he take the fire, he did, and he put out towards home; but presently
here he come back, and he say the fire done gone out. Brer Fox allow that
he want a invite to dinner, but he don't say nothing, and
by and by Brer Rabbit he up and say, says he:
"'Brer Fox, whar you git so much nice beef?' sezee, en den Brer Fox he up'n 'spon', sezee: "'Brer Fox, where you get so much nice beef?' says he, and then Brer Fox he up and respond, says he:
"'You come ter my house ter-morrer ef yo' fokes ain't too sick, en I kin show you whar you kin git plenty beef mo' nicer dan dish yer,' sezee: "'You come to my house tomorrow if your folks ain't too sick, and I can show you where you can get plenty beef more nicer than this here,' says he:
"Well, sho nuff, de nex' day fotch Brer Rabbit, en Brer Fox say, sezee: "Well, sure enough, the next day fetch Brer Rabbit, and Brer Fox say, says he:
"'Der's a man down yander by Miss Meadows's w'at got heap er fine cattle, en he gotter cow name Bookay,' sezee, 'en you des go en say Bookay, en she'll open her mouf, en you kin jump in en git des as much meat ez you kin tote,' sez Brer Fox, sezee. "'There's a man down yonder by Miss Meadows's what got heap of fine cattle, and he got a cow name Bookay,' says he, 'and you just go and say Bookay, and she'll open her mouth, and you can jump in and get just as much meat as you can tote,' says Brer Fox, says he.
"'Well, I'll go 'long,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'en you kin jump fus' en den I'll come follerin' atter,' sezee. "'Well, I'll go along,' says Brer Rabbit, says he, 'and you can jump first and then I'll come following after,' says he.
"Wid dat dey put out, en dey went promernadin' 'roun' 'mong de cattle, dey did, twel bimeby dey struck up wid de one dey wuz atter. Brer Fox, he up, he did, en holler Bookay, en de cow flung 'er mouf wide open. Sho nuff, in dey jump, en w'en dey got dar, Brer Fox, he say, sezee: "With that they put out, and they went promenading around among the cattle, they did, til by and by they struck up with the one they was after. Brer Fox, he up, he did, and holler Bookay, and the cow flung her mouth wide open. Sure enough, in they jump, and when they got there, Brer Fox, he say, says he:
har1880.2007.001.0161.jpg
"'You kin cut mos' ennywheres, Brer Rabbit, but don't cut 'roun' de haslett,' sezee. "'You can cut most anywheres, Brer Rabbit, but don't cut around the haslett,' says he.
"Den Brer Rabbit, he holler back, he did: 'I'm a gitten me out a roas'n-piece;' sezee. "Then Brer Rabbit, he holler back, he did: 'I'm a getting me out a roasting-piece;' says he.
"'Roas'n, er bakin', er fryin',' sez Brer Fox, sezee, 'don't git too nigh de haslett,' sezee. "'Roasting, or baking, or frying,' says Brer Fox, says he, 'don't get too nigh the haslett,' says he.
"Dey cut en dey kyarved, en dey kyarved en dey cut, en w'iles dey wuz cuttin' en kyarvin', en slashin' 'way, Brer Rabbit, he tuck'n hacked inter de haslett, en wid dat down fell de cow dead. They cut and they carved, and they carved and they cut, and while they was cutting and carving, and slashing away, Brer Rabbit, he took and hacked into the haslett, and with that down fell the cow dead.
"'Now, den,' sez Brer Fox, 'we er gone, sho,' sezee. "'Now, then,' says Brer Fox, 'we are gone, sure,' says he.
"'W'at we gwine do?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "'What we going do?' says Brer Rabbit, says he.
"'I'll git in de maul,' sez Brer Fox, 'en you'll jump in de gall,' sezee. "'I'll get in the maul,' says Brer Fox, 'and you'll jump in the gall,' says he.
"Nex' mawnin' yer cum de man w'at de cow b'long ter, an he ax who kill Bookay. Nobody don't say nuthin'. Den de man say he'll cut 'er open en see, en den he whirl in, en twan't no time 'fo' he had 'er intruls spread out. Brer Rabbit, he crope out'n de gall, en say, sezee: "Next morning here come the man what the cow belong to, and he ask who kill Bookay. Nobody don't say nothing. Then the man say he'll cut her open and see, and then he whirl in, and it wasn't no time before he had her entrails spread out. Brer Rabbit, he crept out of the gall, and say, says he:
"'Mister Man! Oh, Mister Man! I'll tell you who kill yo' cow. You look in de maul, en dar you'll fine 'im,' sezee. "'Mister Man! Oh, Mister Man! I'll tell you who kill your cow. You look in the maul, and there you'll find him,' says he.
"Wid dat de man tuck a stick and lam down on de
maul so hard dat he kill Brer Fox stone-dead. W'en Brer Rabbit see Brer
Fox wuz laid out fer good, he make like he mighty sorry, en he up'n ax de
man fer Brer Fox head. Man say he ain't keerin', en den Brer Rabbit
tuck'n brung it ter Brer Fox house. Dar he see ole Miss Fox, en he tell
'er dat he done fotch her some nice beef w'at 'er ole
"With that the man took a stick and lam down on the maul so hard that
he kill Brer Fox stone-dead. When Brer Rabbit see Brer Fox was laid out
for good, he make like he mighty sorry, and he up and ask the man for
Brer Fox head. Man say he ain't caring, and then Brer Rabbit took and
brung it to Brer Fox house. There he see old Miss Fox, and he tell her
that he done fetch her some nice beef what her old
har1880.2007.001.0162.jpg
man sont 'er, but she ain't gotter look at it twel
she go ter eat it.
man sent her, but she ain't got to look at it til she go to eat
it.
"Brer Fox son wuz name Tobe, en Brer Rabbit tell Tobe fer ter keep still w'iles his mammy cook de nice beef w'at his daddy sont 'im. Tobe he wuz mighty hongry, en he look in de pot he did w'iles de cookin' wuz gwine on, en dar he see his daddy head, en wid dat he sot up a howl en tole his mammy. Miss Fox, she git mighty mad w'en she fine she cookin' her ole man head, en she call up de dogs, she did, en sickt em on Brer Rabbit; en ole Miss Fox en Tobe en de dogs, dey push Brer Rabbit so close dat he hatter take a holler tree. Miss Fox, she tell Tobe fer ter stay dar en mine Brer Rabbit, w'ile she goes en git de ax, en w'en she gone, Brer Rabbit, he tole Tobe ef he go ter de branch en git 'im a drink er water dat he'll gin 'im a dollar. Tobe, he put out, he did, en bring some water in his hat, but by de time he got back Brer Rabbit done out en gone. Ole Miss Fox, she cut and cut twel down come de tree, but no Brer Rabbit dar. Den she lay de blame on Tobe, en she say she gwineter lash 'im, en Tobe, he put out en run, de ole 'oman atter 'im. Bimeby, he come up wid Brer Rabbit, en sot down fer to tell 'im how 'twuz, en w'iles dey wuz a settin' dar; yer come ole Miss Fox a slippin' up en grab um bofe. Den she tell um w'at she gwine do. Brer Rabbit she gwineter kill, en Tobe she gwineter lam ef its de las' ack. Den Brer Rabbit sez, sezee: "Brer Fox son was name Tobe, and Brer Rabbit tell Tobe for to keep still while his mammy cook the nice beef what his daddy sent him. Tobe he was mighty hungry, and he look in the pot he did while the cooking was going on, and there he see his daddy head, and with that he set up a howl and told his mammy. Miss Fox, she get mighty mad when she find she cooking her old man head, and she call up the dogs, she did, and sicced them on Brer Rabbit; and old Miss Fox and Tobe and the dogs, they push Brer Rabbit so close that he had to take a hollow tree. Miss Fox, she tell Tobe for to stay there and mind Brer Rabbit, while she goes and get the ax, and when she gone, Brer Rabbit, he told Tobe if he go to the branch and get him a drink of water that he'll give him a dollar. Tobe, he put out, he did, and bring some water in his hat, but by the time he got back Brer Rabbit done out and gone. Old Miss Fox, she cut and cut til down come the tree, but no Brer Rabbit there. Then she lay the blame on Tobe, and she say she going to lash him, and Tobe, he put out and run, the old woman after him. By and by, he come up with Brer Rabbit, and sat down for to tell him how it was, and while they was a setting there; here come old Miss Fox a slipping up and grab them both. Then she tell them what she going do. Brer Rabbit she going to kill, and Tobe she going to lam if it's the last act. Then Brer Rabbit says, says he:
"'Ef you please, ma'am, Miss Fox, lay me on de grindstone en groun' off my nose so I can't smell no mo' w'en I'm dead.' "'If you please, ma'am, Miss Fox, lay me on the grindstone and ground off my nose so I can't smell no more when I'm dead.'
har1880.2007.001.0163.jpg
"Miss Fox, she tuck dis ter be a good idee, en she fotch bofe un um ter de grindestone , en set um up on it so dat she could groun' off Brer Rabbit nose. Den Brer Rabbit, he up'n say, sezee: "Miss Fox, she took this to be a good idea, and she fetch both of them to the grindestone , and set them up on it so that she could ground off Brer Rabbit nose. Then Brer Rabbit, he up and say, says he:
"'Ef you please, ma'am, Miss Fox, Tobe he kin turn de' handle w'iles you goes atter some water fer ter wet de grinestone,' sezee. "'If you please, ma'am, Miss Fox, Tobe he can turn the handle while you goes after some water for to wet the grindstone,' says he.
"Co'se, soon'z Brer Rabbit see Miss Fox go atter de water, he jump down en put out, en dis time he git clean away." "Course, soon as Brer Rabbit see Miss Fox go after the water, he jump down and put out, and this time he get clean away."
"And was that the last of the Rabbit, too, Uncle Remus?" the little boy asked, with something like a sigh.
"Don't push me too close, honey," responded the old man; "don't shove me up in no cornder. I don't wanter tell you no stories. Some say dat Brer Rabbit's ole 'oman died fum eatin' some pizen-weed, en dat Brer Rabbit married ole Miss Fox, en some say not. Some tells one tale en some tells nudder; some say dat fum dat time forrer'd de Rabbits en de Foxes make frien's en stay so; some say dey kep on quollin'. Hit look like it mixt. Let dem tell you w'at knows. Dat w'at I years you gits it straight like I yeard it." "don't shove me up in no corner. I don't want to tell you no stories. Some say that Brer Rabbit's old woman died from eating some poison-weed, and that Brer Rabbit married old Miss Fox, and some say not. Some tells one tale and some tells another; some say that from that time forward the Rabbits and the Foxes make friends and stay so; some say they kept on quarreling. It look like it mixed. Let them tell you what knows. That what I hears you gets it straight like I heard it."
There was a long pause, which was finally broken by the old man:
"Hit's 'gin de rules fer you ter be noddin' yer, honey. Bimeby you'll drap off en I'll hatter tote you up ter de big 'ouse. I hear dat baby cryin', en bimeby Miss Sally'll fly up en be a holler'n atter you." "It's against the rules for you to be nodding here, honey. By and by you'll drop off and I'll have to tote you up to the big house. I hear that baby crying, and by and by Miss Sally'll fly up and be a hollering after you."
"Oh, I wasn't asleep," the little boy replied. "I was just thinking."
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"Well, dat's diffunt," "Well, that's different," said the old man. "Ef you'll clime up on my back," "If you'll climb up on my back," he continued, speaking softly, "I speck I ain't too ole fer ter be yo' hoss fum yer ter de house. Many en many's de time dat I toted yo' Unk Jeems dat away, en Mars Jeems wuz heavier sot dan w'at you is." "I expect I ain't too old for to be your horse from here to the house. Many and many's the time that I toted your Uncle James that away, and Master James was heavier set than what you is."
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PLANTATION PROVERBS.
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HIS SONGS.
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I.
REVIVAL HYMN.
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II.
CAMP-MEETING SONG. [note *]
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III.
CORN-SHUCKING SONG.
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IV.
THE PLOUGH-HANDS' SONG.
(JASPER COUNTY—1860.)
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V.
CHRISTMAS PLAY-SONG.
(MYRICK PLACE, PUTNAM COUNTY—1858.)
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VI.
PLANTATION PLAY-SONG.
(PUTNAM COUNTY—1856.)
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VII.
TRANSCRIPTIONS. [note *]
1. A PLANTATION CHANT.
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2. A PLANTATION SERENADE
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VIII.
THE BIG BETHEL CHURCH.
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IX.
TIME GOES BY TURNS.
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A STORY OF THE WAR.
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A STORY OF THE WAR.
When Miss Theodosia Huntingdon, of Burlington, Vermont, concluded to come South in 1870, she was moved by three considerations. In the first place, her brother, John Huntingdon, had become a citizen of Georgia—having astonished his acquaintances by marrying a young lady, the male members of whose family had achieved considerable distinction in the Confederate army; in the second place, she was anxious to explore a region which she almost unconsciously pictured to herself as remote and semi-barbarous; and, in the third place, her friends had persuaded her that to some extent she was an invalid. It was in vain that she argued with herself as to the propriety of undertaking the journey alone and unprotected, and she finally put an end to inward and outward doubts by informing herself and her friends, including John Huntingdon, her brother, who was practicing law in Atlanta, that she had decided to visit the South.
When, therefore, on the 12th of October, 1870—the date is duly recorded in one of
Miss Theodosia's letters—she alighted from the cars in Atlanta, in the midst of a
great crowd, she fully expected to find her brother waiting to
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receive her. The bells
of several locomotives were ringing, a number of trains were moving in and out, and
the porters and baggage-men were screaming and bawling to such an extent that for
several moments Miss Huntingdon was considerably confused; so much so that she paused
in the hope that her brother would suddenly appear and rescue her from the smoke, and
dust, and din. At that moment some one touched her on the arm, and she heard a
strong, half-confident, half-apologetic voice exclaim:
"Ain't dish yer Miss Doshy?" "Ain't this here Miss Doshy?"
Turning, Miss Theodosia saw at her side a tall, gray-haired negro. Elaborating the incident afterward to her friends, she was pleased to say that the appearance of the old man was somewhat picturesque. He stood towering above her, his hat in one hand, a carriage-whip in the other, and an expectant smile lighting up his rugged face. She remembered a name her brother had often used in his letters, and, with a woman's tact, she held out her hand, and said:
"Is this Uncle Remus?"
"Law, Miss Doshy! how you know de ole nigger? I know'd you by de faver; but how you know me?" "Law, Miss Doshy! how you know the old nigger? I knowed you by the favor; but how you know me?" And then, without waiting for a reply: "Miss Sally, she sick in bed, en Mars John, he bleedzd ter go in de country, en dey tuck'n sont me. I know'd you de minnit I laid eyes on you. Time I seed you, I say ter myse'f, 'I lay dar's Miss Doshy,' en, sho nuff, dar you wuz. You ain't gun up yo' checks, is you? Kaze I'll git de trunk sont up by de 'spress waggin." "Miss Sally, she sick in bed, and Master John, he to go in the country, and they took and sent me. I knowed you the minute I laid eyes on you. Time I seed you, I say to myself, 'I lay there's Miss Doshy,' and, sure enough, there you was. You ain't gun up your checks, is you? 'Cause I'll get the trunk sent up by the express wagon."
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The next moment Uncle Remus was elbowing his way unceremoniously through the crowd, and in a very short time, seated in the carriage driven by the old man, Miss Huntington was whirling through the streets of Atlanta in the direction of her brother's home. She took advantage of the opportunity to study the old negro's face closely, her natural curiosity considerably sharpened by a knowledge of the fact that Uncle Remus had played an important part in her brother's history. The result of her observation must have been satisfactory, for presently she laughed, and said:
"Uncle Remus, you haven't told me how you knew me in that great crowd."
The old man chuckled, and gave the horses a gentle rap with the whip.
"Who? Me! I know'd you by de faver. Dat boy er Mars John's is de ve'y spit en immij un you. I'd a know'd you in New 'Leens, let 'lone down dar in de kyar-shed." "Who? Me! I knowed you by the favor. That boy of Master John's is the very spit and image of you. I'd a knowed you in New Orleans, let alone down there in the car-shed."
This was Miss Theodosia's introduction to Uncle Remus. One Sunday afternoon, a few weeks after her arrival, the family were assembled in the piazza enjoying the mild weather. Mr. Huntingdon was reading a newspaper; his wife was crooning softly as she rocked the baby to sleep; and the little boy was endeavoring to show his Aunt Dosia the outlines of Kennesaw Mountain throngh the purple haze that hung like a wonderfully fashioned curtain in the sky and almost obliterated the horizon. While they were thus engaged, Uncle Remus came around the corner of the house, talking to himself.
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"Dey er too lazy ter wuk," "They are too lazy to work," he was saying, "en dey specks hones' fokes fer ter stan' up en s'port um. I'm gwine down ter Putmon County whar Mars Jeems is—dat's w'at I'm agwine ter do." "and they expects honest folks for to stand up and support them. I'm going down to Putnam County where Master James is—that's what I'm a'going to do."
"What's the matter now, Uncle Remus?" inquired Mr. Huntingdon, folding up his newspaper.
"Nuthin' 'tall, Mars John, 'ceppin deze yer sunshine niggers. Dey begs my terbacker, en borrys my tools, en steals my vittles, en hit's done come ter dat pass dat I gotter pack up en go. I'm agwine down ter Putmon, dat's w'at." "Nothing at all, Master John, excepting these here sunshine niggers. They begs my tobacco, and borrows my tools, and steals my vittles, and it's done come to that pass that I got to pack up and go. I'm a'going down to Putnam, that's what."
Uncle Remus was accustomed to make this threat several times a day, but upon this occasion it seemed to remind Mr. Huntingdon of something.
"Very well," he said, "I'll come around and help you pack up, but before you go I want you to tell Sister here how you went to war and fought for the Union.—Remus was a famous warrior," he continued, turning to Miss Theodosia; "he volunteered for one day, and commanded an army of one. You know the story, but you have never heard Remus's version."
Uncle Remus shuffled around in an awkward, embarrassed way, scratched his head, and looked uncomfortable.
"Miss Doshy ain't got no time fer ter set dar an year de ole nigger run on." "Miss Doshy ain't got no time for to set there and hear the old nigger run on."
"Oh, yes, I have, Uncle Remus!" exclaimed the young lady; "plenty of time."
The upshot of it was that, after many ridiculous protests, Uncle Remus sat down on
the steps, and proceeded to tell
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his story of the war. Miss
Theodosia listened with great interest, but throughout it all she observed—and she
was painfully conscious of the fact, as she afterward admitted—that Uncle Remus spoke
from the standpoint of a Southerner, and with the air of one who expected his hearers
to thoroughly sympathize with him.
"Co'se,"
"Course,"
said Uncle Remus, addressing himself to Miss Theodosia,
"you ain't bin to Putmon, en you dunner whar de Brad
Slaughter place en Harmony Grove is, but Mars John en Miss Sally, dey bin
dar a time er two, en dey knows how de lan' lays. Well, den, it 'uz right
'long in dere whar Mars Jeems lived, en whar he live now. When de war come
'long he wuz livin' dere longer Ole Miss en Miss Sally. Ole Miss 'uz his ma,
en Miss Sally dar 'uz his sister. De war come des like I tell you, en
marters sorter rock along same like dey allers did. Hit didn't strike me dat
dey wuz enny war gwine on, en ef I hadn't sorter miss de nabers, en seed
fokes gwine outer de way fer ter ax de news, I'd a 'lowed ter myse'f dat de
war wuz 'way off 'mong some yuther country. But all dis time de fuss wuz
gwine on, en Mars Jeems, he wuz des eatchin' fer ter put in. Ole Miss en
Miss Sally, dey tuck on so he didn't git off de fus' year, but bimeby news
come down dat times wuz gittin putty hot, en Mars Jeems he got up, he did,
en say he gotter go, en go he did. He got a overseer fer ter look atter de
place, en he went en jined de army. En he 'uz a fighter, too, mon, Mars
Jeems wuz. Many's en many's de time,"
"you ain't been to Putnam , and you don't know where the Brad
Slaughter place and Harmony Grove is, but Master John and Miss Sally, they
been there a time or two, and they knows how the land lays. Well, then, it
was right along in there where Master James lived, and where he live now.
When the war come along he was living there along with Old Miss and Miss
Sally. Old Miss was his ma, and Miss Sally there was his sister. The war
come just like I tell you, and matters sort of rock along same like they
always did. It didn't strike me that they was any war going on, and if I
hadn't sort of miss the neighbors, and seed folks going out of the way for
to ask the news, I'd have allowed to myself that the war was away off among
some other country. But all this time the fuss was going on, and Master
James, he was just itching for to put in. Old Miss and Miss Sally, they took
on so he didn't get off the first year, but by and by news come down that
times was getting pretty hot, and Master James he got up, he did, and say he
got to go, and go he did. He got a overseer for to look after the place, and
he went and joined the army. And he was a fighter, too, man, Master James
was. Many's and many's the time,"
continued the old man, reflectively,
"dat I hatter take'n bresh dat boy on accounter his
'buzin' en beatin' dem yuther boys.
"that I had to take and brush that boy on account of his abusing and
beating them other boys.
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He went off dar fer ter fight, en he fit. Ole Miss
useter call me up Sunday en read w'at de papers say 'bout Mars Jeems, en it
hope 'er up might'ly. I kin see 'er des like it 'uz yistiddy.
He went off there for to fight, and he fit. Old Miss
used to call me up Sunday and read what the papers say about Master James,
and it hope her up mightily. I can see her just like it was
yesterday.
"'Remus,' sez she, 'dish yer's w'at de papers say 'bout my baby,' en den she'd read out twel she couldn't read fer cryin'. Hit went on dis way year in en year out, en dem wuz lonesome times, sho's you bawn, Miss Doshy—lonesome times, sho. Hit got hotter en hotter in de war, en lonesomer en mo' lonesomer at home, en bimeby 'long come de conscrip' man, en he des everlas'nly scoop up Mars Jeems's overseer. W'en dis come 'bout, ole Miss, she sont atter me en say, sez she: "'Remus,' says she, 'this here's what the papers say about my baby,' and then she'd read out til she couldn't read for crying. It went on this way year in and year out, and them was lonesome times, sure as you born, Miss Doshy—lonesome times, sure. It got hotter and hotter in the war, and lonesomer and more lonesomer at home, and by and by along come the conscript man, and he just everlastingly scoop up Master James's overseer. When this come about, old Miss, she sent after me and say, says she:
"'Remus, I ain't got nobody fer ter look arter de place but you,' sez she, en den I up'n say, sez I: "'Remus, I ain't got nobody for to look after the place but you,' says she, and then I up and say, says I:
"'Mistiss, you kin des 'pen' on de ole nigger.' "'Mistress, you can just depend on the old nigger.'
"I wuz ole den, Miss Doshy—let 'lone w'at I is now; en you better b'leeve I bossed dem han's. I had dem niggers up en in de fiel' long 'fo' day, en de way dey did wuk wuz a caution. Ef dey didn't earnt der vittles dat season den I ain't name Remus. But dey wuz tuk keer un. Dey had plenty er cloze en plenty er grub, en dey wuz de fattes' niggers in de settlement. "I was old then, Miss Doshy—let alone what I is now; and you better believe I bossed them hands. I had them niggers up and in the field long before day, and the way they did work was a caution. If they didn't earn their vittles that season then I ain't name Remus. But they was took care of. They had plenty of clothes and plenty of grub, and they was the fattest niggers in the settlement.
"Bimeby one day, Ole Miss, she call me up en say de
Yankees done gone en tuck Atlanty—dish yer ve'y town; den present'y I hear
dey wuz a marchin' on down todes Putmon, en, lo en beholes! one day, de fus
news I know'd, Mars Jeems he rid up wid a whole gang er men. He des stop
long nuff fer ter change hosses en snatch a mouffle er
"By and by one day, Old Miss, she call me up and say the Yankees done gone
and took Atlanta—this here very town; then presently I hear they was
a'marching on down towards Putnam, and, lo and behold! one day, the first
news I knowed, Master James he rid up with a whole gang of men. He just stop
long enough for to change horses and snatch a mouthful of
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sump'n' ter eat, but 'fo' he rid off, he call me up en
say, sez he:
something to eat, but before he rode off, he call me up and say, says
he:
"'Daddy'—all Ole Miss's chilluns call me daddy—'Daddy,' he say, ''pears like dere's gwineter be mighty rough times 'roun' yer. De Yankees, dey er done got ter Madison en Mounticellar, en 'twon't be many days 'fo' dey er down yer. 'Tain't likely dey'll pester mother ner sister; but, daddy, ef de wus come ter de wus, I speck you ter take keer un um,' sezee. "'Daddy'—all Old Miss's children call me daddy—'Daddy,' he say, ''appears like there's going to be mighty rough times around here. The Yankees, they have done got to Madison and Monticello, and it won't be many days before they are down here. It ain't likely they'll pester mother nor sister; but, daddy, if the worse come to the worst, I expect you to take care of them,' says he.
"Den I say, sez I: 'How long you bin knowin' me, Mars Jeems?' sez I. "Then I say, says I: 'How long you been knowing me, Master James?' says I.
"'Sence I wuz a baby,' sezee. "'Since I was a baby,' says he.
"'Well, den, Mars Jeems,' sez I, 'you know'd t'wa'nt no use fer ter ax me ter take keer Ole Miss en Miss Sally.' "'Well, then, Master James,' says I, 'you knowed it wasn't no use for to ask me to take care Old Miss and Miss Sally.'
"Den he tuck'n squoze my han' en jump on de filly I bin savin' fer 'im, en rid off. One time he tu'n 'roun' en look like he wanter say sump'n', but he des waf' his han'—so—en gallop on. I know'd den dat trouble wuz brewin'. Nigger dat knows he's gwineter git thumped kin sorter fix hisse'f, en I tuck'n fix up like de war wuz gwineter come right in at de front gate. I tuck'n got all de cattle en hosses tergedder en driv' um to de fo'-mile place, en I tuck all de corn en fodder en w'eat, en put um in a crib out dar in de woods; en I bilt me a pen in de swamp, en dar I put de hogs. Den, w'en I fix all dis, I put on my Sunday cloze en groun' my axe. Two whole days I groun' dat axe. De grinestone wuz in sight er de gate en close ter de big 'ouse, en dar I tuck my stan'. "Then he took and squeeze my hand and jump on the filly I been saving for him, and rode off. One time he turn around and look like he want to say something, but he just waved his hand—so—and gallop on. I knowed then that trouble was brewing. Nigger that knows he's going to get thumped can sort of fix hisself, and I took and fix up like the war was going to come right in at the front gate. I took and got all the cattle and horses together and drive them to the four-mile place, and I took all the corn and fodder and wheat, and put them in a crib out there in the woods; and I built me a pen in the swamp, and there I put the hogs. Then, when I fix all this, I put on my Sunday clothes and ground my axe. Two whole days I ground that axe. The grindstone was in sight of the gate and close to the big house, and there I took my stand.
"Bimeby one day, yer come de Yankees. Two un um
"By and by one day, here come the Yankees. Two of them
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come fus, en den de whole face er de yeath swawm'd wid
um. De fus glimpse I kotch un um, I tuck my axe en march inter Ole Miss
settin'-room. She done had de sidebode move in dar, en I wish I may drap ef
twuzn't fa'rly blazin' wid silver—silver cups en silver sassers, silver
plates en silver dishes, silver mugs en silver pitchers. Look like ter me
dey wuz fixin' fer a weddin'. Dar sot Ole Miss des ez prim en ez proud ez ef
she own de whole county. Dis kinder hope me up, kaze I done seed Ole Miss
look dat away once befo' w'en de overseer struck me in de face wid a w'ip. I
sot down by de fier wid my axe 'tween my knees. Dar we sot w'iles de Yankees
ransack de place. Miss Sally, dar, she got sorter restless, but Ole Miss
didn't skasely bat 'er eyes. Bimeby, we hear steps on de peazzer, en yer
come a couple er young fellers wid strops on der shoulders, en der sodes a
draggin' on de flo', en der spurrers a rattlin'. I won't say I wuz skeer'd,"
come first, and then the whole face of the earth swarmed with them. The
first glimpse I catch of them, I took my axe and march into Old Miss
setting-room. She done had the move in there, and I
wish I may drop if it wasn't fairly blazing with silver—silver cups and
silver saucers, silver plates and silver dishes, silver mugs and silver
pitchers. Look like to me they was fixing for a wedding. There sat Old Miss
just as prim and as proud as if she own the whole county. This kind of
hope me up, 'cause I done seen Old Miss look that away once before
when the overseer struck me in the face with a whip. I sat down by the fire
with my axe between my knees. There we sat while the Yankees ransack the
place. Miss Sally, there, she got sort of restless, but Old Miss didn't
scarcely bat her eyes. By and by, we hear steps on the piazza, and here come
a couple of young fellows with straps on their shoulders, and their swords
a'dragging on the floor, and their spurs a'rattling. I won't say I was
scared,"
said Uncle Remus, as though endeavoring to recall something he failed to
remember,
"I wont say I wuz skeer'd, kaze I wuzent; but I wuz
took'n wid a mighty funny feelin' in de naberhood er de gizzard. Dey wuz
mighty perlite, dem young chaps wuz; but Ole Miss, she never tu'n 'er head,
en Miss Sally, she look straight at de fier. Bimeby one un um see me, en he
say, sezee:
"I won't say I was scared, 'cause I wasn't; but I was
took'n with a mighty funny feeling in the neighborhood of the
gizzard. They was mighty polite, them young chaps was; but Old Miss, she
never turn her head, and Miss Sally, she look straight at the fire. By and
by one of them see me, and he say, says he:
"'Hello, ole man, w'at you doin' in yer?' sezee. "'Hello, old man, what you doing in here?' sezee.
"'Well, boss,' sez I, 'I bin cuttin' some wood fer Ole Miss, en I des stop fer ter wom my han's a little,' sez I. "'Well, boss,' says I, 'I been cutting some wood for Old Miss, and I just stop for to warm my hands a little,' says I.
"'Hit is cole, dat's a fack,' sezee. "'It is cold, that's a fact,' says he.
"Wid dat I got up en tuck my stan' behime Ole Miss
"With that I got up and took my stand behind Old Miss
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[illustration - "SEEM LIKE I AIN'T NEVER SEE NO RAW DAY LIKE DAT."]
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en Miss Sally, en de man w'at speak, he went up en wom
his han's. Fus thing you know, he raise up sudden, en say, sezee:
and Miss Sally, and the man what speak, he went up and warm his hands.
First thing you know, he raise up sudden, and say, says he:
"'W'at dat on yo' axe?' "'What that on your axe?'
"'Dat's de fier shinin' on it,' sez I. "'That's the fire shining on it,' says I.
"'Hit look like blood,' sezee, en den he laft. "'It look like blood,' says he, and then he laughed.
"But, bless yo' soul, dat man wouldn't never laft dat day ef he'd know'd de wukkins er Remus's mine. But dey didn't bodder nobody ner tech nuthin', en bimeby dey put out. Well, de Yankees, dey kep' passin' all de mawnin' en it look like ter me dey wuz a string un um ten mile long. Den dey commence gittin' thinner en thinner, en den atter w'ile we hear skummishin' in de naberhood er Armer's fe'y, en Ole Miss 'low how dat wuz Wheeler's men makin' persoot. Mars Jeems wuz wid dem Wheeler fellers, en I know'd ef dey wuz dat close I wa'n't doin' no good settin' 'roun' de house toas'n my shins at de fier, so I des tuck Mars Jeems's rifle fum behime de do' en put out ter look atter my stock. "But, bless your soul, that man wouldn't never laughed that day if he'd knowed the workings of Remus's mind. But they didn't bother nobody nor touch nothing, and by and by they put out. Well, the Yankees, they kept passing all the morning and it look like to me they was a string of them ten mile long. Then they commence getting thinner and thinner, and then after while we hear skirmishing in the neighborhood of Armer's fe'y, and Old Miss allow how that was Wheeler's men making pusuit. Master James was with them Wheeler fellows, and I knowed if they was that close I wasn't doing no good setting around the house toasting my shins at the fire, so I just took Master James's rifle from behind the door and put out to look after my stock.
"Seem like I ain't never see no raw day like dat, needer befo' ner sence. Dey wa'n't no rain, but de wet des sifted down; mighty raw day. De leaves on de groun' 'uz so wet dey don't make no fuss, en I got in de woods, en w'enever I year de Yankees gwine by, I des stop in my tracks en let um pass. I wuz stan'in' dat away in de aidge er de woods lookin' out 'cross a clearin', w'en—piff!—out come a little bunch er blue smoke fum de top er wunner dem big lonesome-lookin' pines, en den—pow! "Seem like I ain't never see no raw day like that, neither before nor since. They wasn't no rain, but the wet just sifted down; mighty raw day. The leaves on the ground was so wet they don't make no fuss, and I got in the woods, and whenever I hear the Yankees going by, I just stop in my tracks and let them pass. I was standing that away in the edge of the woods looking out across a clearing, when—piff!—out come a little bunch of blue smoke from the top of one of them big lonesome-looking pines, and then—pow!
"Sez I ter myse'f, sez I: 'Honey, youer right on my
"Says I to myself, says I: 'Honey, you're right on my
har1880.2007.001.0206.jpg
route, en I'll des see w'at kinder bird you got
roostin' in you,' en w'iles I wuz a lookin' out bus' de smoke—piff! en den—bang! Wid dat I
des drapt back inter de woods, en sorted skeerted 'roun' so's ter git de
tree 'twix' me en de road. I slid up putty close, en wadder you speck I see?
Des ez sho's youer settin' dar lissenin' dey wuz a live Yankee up dar in dat
tree, en he wuz a loadin' en a shootin' at de boys des ez cool es a
cowcumber in de jew, en he had his hoss hitch out in de bushes, kaze I year
de creetur tromplin' 'roun'. He had a spy-glass up dar, en w'iles I wuz a
watchin' un 'im, he raise 'er up en look thoo 'er, en den he lay 'er down en
fix his gun fer ter shoot. I had good eyes in dem days, ef I ain't got um
now, en 'way up de big road I see Mars Jeems a comin'. Hit wuz too fur fer
ter see his face, but I know'd 'im by de filly w'at I raise fer 'im, en she
wuz a prancin' like a school-gal. I know'd dat man wuz gwineter shoot Mars
Jeems ef he could, en dat wuz mo'n I could stan'. Manys en manys de time dat
I nuss dat boy, en hilt 'im in dese arms, en toted 'im on dis back, en w'en
I see dat Yankee lay dat gun 'cross a lim' en take aim at Mars Jeems I up
wid my ole rifle, en shet my eyes en let de man have all she had."
route, and I'll just see what kind of bird you got roosting in you,' and
while I was a'looking out bus' the smoke—piff! and then—bang! With that I just
dropped back into the woods, and sorted skirted around so as to get the tree
betwixt me and the road. I slid up pretty close, and what do you expect I
see? Just as sure as you're setting there listening they was a live Yankee
up there in that tree, and he was a'loading and a'shooting at the boys just
as cool as a cucumber in the dew, and he had his horse hitch out in the
bushes, 'cause I hear the creature around. He had a
spy-glass up there, and while I was a'watching of him, he raise her up and
look through her, and then he lay her down and fix his gun for to shoot. I
had good eyes in them days, if I ain't got them now, and away up the big
road I see Master James a'coming. It was too far for to see his face, but I
knowed him by the filly what I raise for him, and she was a'prancing like a
school-gal. I knowed that man was going to shoot Master James if he could,
and that was more than I could stand. Manys and manys the time that I nurse
that boy, and held him in these arms, and toted him on this back, and when I
see that Yankee lay that gun across a limb and take aim at Master James I up
with my old rifle, and shut my eyes and let the man have all she had."
"Do you mean to say," exclaimed Miss Theodosia, indignantly, "that you shot the Union soldier, when you knew he was fighting for your freedom?"
"Co'se, I know all about dat,"
"Course, I know all about that,"
responded Uncle Remus,
"en it sorter made cole chills run up my back; but
w'en I see dat man take aim, en Mars Jeems gwine home ter Ole Miss en Miss
Sally, I des disremembered all 'bout freedom
"and it sort of made cold chills run up my back; but when I see that man
take aim, and Master James going home to Old Miss and Miss Sally, I just
disremembered all about freedom
har1880.2007.001.0207.jpg
en lammed aloose. En den atter dat, me en Miss Sally
tuck en nuss de man right straight along. He los' one arm in dat tree
bizness, but me en Miss Sally we nuss 'im en we nuss 'im twel he done got
well. Des 'bout dat time I quit nuss'n 'im, but Miss Sally she kep' on. She
kep' on,"
and lammed aloose. And then after that, me and Miss Sally took and nurse
the man right straight along. He lost one arm in that tree business, but me
and Miss Sally we nurse him and we nurse him til he done got well. Just
about that time I quit nursing him, but Miss Sally she kept on. She kept
on,"
continued Uncle Remus, pointing to Mr. Huntingdon,
"en now dar he is."
"and now there he is."
"But you cost him an arm," exclaimed Miss Theodosia.
"I gin 'im dem," "I give him them," said Uncle Remus, pointing to Mrs. Huntingdon, "en I gin 'im deze" "and I give him these" —holding up his own brawny arms. "En ef dem ain't nuff fer enny man den I done los' de way." "And if them ain't enough for any man then I done lost the way."
har1880.2007.001.0208.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0209.jpg
HIS SAYINGS.
har1880.2007.001.0210.jpg
har1880.2007.001.0211.jpg
I.
JEEMS ROBER'SON'S LAST ILLNESS.
A Jonesboro negro, while waiting for the train to go out, met up with Uncle Remus. After the usual "time of day" had been passed between the two, the former inquired about an acquaintance.
"How's Jeems Rober'son?" "How's James Robertson?" he asked.
"Ain't you year 'bout Jim?" "Ain't you hear about Jim?" asked Uncle Remus.
"Dat I ain't," "That I ain't," responded the other; "I ain't hear talk er Jem sence he cut loose fum de chain-gang. Dat w'at make I ax. He ain't down wid de biliousness, is he?" "I ain't hear talk of Jim since he cut loose from the chain-gang. That what make I ask. He ain't down with the biliousness, is he?"
"Not dat I knows un,"
"Not that I knows of,"
responded Uncle Remus, gravely.
"He ain't sick, an' he ain't bin sick. He des tuck'n
say he wuz gwineter ride dat ar roan mule er Mars John's de udder Sunday,
an' de mule, she up'n do like she got nudder ingagement. I done bin fool
wid dat mule befo', an' I tuck'n tole Jim dat he better not git tangle up
wid 'er; but Jim, he up'n 'low dat he wuz a hoss-doctor, an' wid dat he
ax me fer a chaw terbarker, en den he got de bridle, en tuck'n kotch de
mule en got on her—Well,"
"He ain't sick, and he ain't been sick. He just took
and say he was going to ride that there roan mule of Master John's the
other Sunday, and the mule, she up and do like she got another
engagement. I done been fool with that mule before, and I took and told
Jim that he better not get tangle up with her; but Jim, he up and allow
that he was a horse-doctor, and with that he ask me for a chew
tobacco, and then he got the bridle, and took and catch the mule and got
on her—Well,"
continued Uncle Remus, looking uneasily around,
"I speck
"I expect
har1880.2007.001.0212.jpg
you better go git yo' ticket. Dey tells me dish yer
train goes a callyhootin'."
you better go get your ticket. They tells me this here train goes a
callyhootin'."
"Hole on dar, Uncle Remus; you ain't tell me 'bout Jim," "Hold on there, Uncle Remus; you ain't tell me about Jim," exclaimed the Jonesboro negro.
"I done tell you all I knows, chile. Jim, he tuck'n light on de mule, an' de mule she up'n hump 'erse'f, an den dey wuz a skuffle, an' w'en de dus' blow 'way, dar lay de nigger on de groun', an' de mule she stood eatin' at de troff wid wunner Jim's gallusses wrop 'roun' her behime-leg. Den atterwuds, de ker'ner, he come 'roun', an' he tuck'n gin it out dat Jim died sorter accdental like. Hit's des like I tell you: de nigger wern't sick a minnit. So long! Bimeby you won't ketch yo' train. I got ter be knockin' long." "I done tell you all I knows, child. Jim, he took and light on the mule, and the mule she up and hump herself, and then they was a scuffle, and when the dust blow away, there lay the nigger on the ground, and the mule she stood eating at the trough with one of Jim's gallusses wrap around her behind-leg. Then afterwards, the ker'ner, he come around, and he took and give it out that Jim died sort of accidental like. It's just like I tell you: the nigger weren't sick a minute. So long! By and by you won't catch your train. I got to be knocking long."
II.
UNCLE REMUS'S CHURCH EXPERIENCE.
The deacon of a colored church met Uncle Remus recently, and, after some uninteresting remarks about the weather, asked:
"How dis you don't come down ter chu'ch no mo', Brer Remus? We er bin er havin' some mighty 'freshen' times lately." "How this you don't come down to church no more, Brother Remus? We have been er having some mighty 'freshen' times lately."
"Hit's bin a long time sence I bin down dar, Brer Rastus, an' hit'll be longer. I done got my dose." "It's been a long time since I been down there, Brother Rastus, and it'll be longer. I done got my dose."
"You ain't done gone an' unjined, is you, Brer Remus?" "You ain't done gone and unjoined, is you, Brother Remus?"
har1880.2007.001.0213.jpg
"Not zackly, Brer Rastus. I des tuck'n draw'd out. De members 'uz a blame sight too mutuel fer ter suit my doctrines." "Not exactly, Brother Rastus. I just took and drawed out. The members was a blame sight too mutual for to suit my doctrines."
"How wuz dat, Brer Remus?" "How was that, Brother Remus?"
"'Well, I tell you, Brer Rastus. W'en I went ter dat chu'ch, I went des ez umbill ez de nex' one. I went dar fer ter sing, an' fer ter pray, an' fer ter wushup, an' I mos' giner'lly allers had a stray shinplarster w'ich de ole 'oman say she want sont out dar ter dem cullud fokes 'cross de water. Hit went on dis way twel bimeby, one day, de fus news I know'd der was a row got up in de amen cornder. Brer Dick, he 'nounced dat dey wern't nuff money in de box; an' Brer Sim said if dey wern't he speck Brer Dick know'd whar it disappeared ter; an' den Brer Dick 'low'd dat he won't stan' no 'probusness, an' wid dat he haul off an' tuck Brer Sim under de jaw—ker blap!—an' den dey clinched an' drapped on de flo' an' fout under de benches an' 'mong de wimmen. "'Well, I tell you, Brother Rastus. When I went to that church, I went just as humble as the next one. I went there for to sing, and for to pray, and for to worship, and I most generally always had a stray shinplarster which the old woman say she want sent out there to them colored folks across the water. It went on this way til by and by, one day, the first news I knowed there was a row got up in the amen corner. Brother Dick, he announced that they weren't enough money in the box; and Brother Sim said if they weren't he expect Brother Dick knowed where it disappeared to; and then Brother Dick allowed that he won't stand no 'probusness, and with that he haul off and took Brother Sim under the jaw—ker blap!—and then they clinched and dropped on the floor and fought under the benches and among the women.
"'Bout dat time Sis Tempy, she lipt up in de a'r, an'
sing out dat she done gone an' tromple on de Ole Boy, an' she kep' on
lippin' up an' slingin' out 'er han's twel bimeby—blip!—she tuck Sis Becky in de mouf, an' den Sis Becky riz an'
fetch a grab at Sis Tempy, an' I 'clar' ter grashus ef didn't 'pear ter
me like she got a poun' er wool. Atter dat de revivin' sorter het up
like. Bofe un um had kin 'mong de mo'ners, an' ef you ever see skufflin'
an' scramblin' hit wuz den an' dar. Brer Jeems Henry, he mounted Brer
Plato an' rid 'im over de railin', an' den de preacher he start down fum
de pulpit, an' des ez he wuz
"'About that time Sis Tempy, she leaped up in the air,
and sing out that she done gone and trample on the Old Boy, and
she kept on leaping up and slinging out her hands til by and by—blip!—she took Sis Becky in the mouth, and then
Sis Becky rose and fetch a grab at Sis Tempy, and I declare to gracious
if didn't appear to me like she got a pound of wool. After that the
reviving sort of heat up like. Both of them had kin among the
mo'ners, and if you ever see scuffling and scrambling it was
then and there. Brother James Henry, he mounted Brother Plato and rode
him over the railing, and then the preacher he start down from the
pulpit, and just as he was
har1880.2007.001.0214.jpg
skippin' onter de flatform a hyme-book kotch 'im in de
bur er de year, an' I be bless ef it didn't soun' like a bungshell'd
busted. Des den, Brer Jesse, he riz up in his seat, sorter keerless like,
an' went down inter his britches atter his razer, an' right den I know'd
sho' nuff trubble wuz begun. Sis Dilsey, she seed it herse'f, an' she
tuck'n let off wunner dem hallyluyah hollers, an' den I disremember w'at
come ter pass.
skipping onto the flatform a
hymn-book catch him in the bur of the ear, and I be bless if it
didn't sound like a bungshell'd busted. Just then,
Brother Jesse, he rose up in his seat, sort of careless like, and went
down into his britches after his razor, and right then I knowed sure
enough trouble was begun. Sis Dilsey, she seed it herself, and she took
and let off one of them hallelujah hollers, and then I disremember what
come to pass.
"I'm gittin' sorter ole, Brer Rastus, an' it seem like de dus' sorter shet out de pannyrammer. Fuddermo', my lim's got ter akin, mo' speshully w'en I year Brer Sim an' Brer Dick a snortin' and a skufflin' under de benches like ez dey wuz sorter makin' der way ter my pew. So I kinder hump myse'f an' scramble out, and de fus man wa't I seed was a p'leeceman, an' he had a nigger 'rested, an' de fergiven name er dat nigger wuz Remus." "I'm getting sort of old, Brother Rastus, and it seem like the dust sort of shut out the pannyrammer. Furthermore, my limbs got to aching, more especially when I hear Brother Sim and Brother Dick a'snorting and a'scuffling under the benches like as they was sort of making their way to my pew. So I kind of hump myself and scramble out, and the first man what I seed was a policeman, and he had a nigger arrested, and the fergiven name of that nigger was Remus."
"He didn't 'res' you, did he, Brer Remus?" "He didn't arrest you, did he, Brother Remus?"
"Hit's des like I tell you, Brer Rastus, an' I hatter git Mars John fer to go inter my bon's fer me. Hit ain't no use fer ter sing out chu'ch ter me, Brer Rastus. I done bin an' got my dose. W'en I goes ter war, I wanter know w'at I'm a doin'. I don't wanter git hemmed up 'mong no wimmen and preachers. I wants elbow-room, an' I'm bleedzd ter have it. Des gimme elbow-room." "It's just like I tell you, Brother Rastus, and I had to get Master John for to go into my bonds for me. It ain't no use for to sing out church to me, Brother Rastus. I done been and got my dose. When I goes to war, I want to know what I'm a'doing. I don't want to get hemmed up among no women and preachers. I wants elbow-room, and I'm bleedzd to have it. Just give me elbow-room."
"But Brer Remus, you ain't—"
"I mout drap in, Brer Rastus, an' den agin I moutn't;
but w'en you duz see me santer in de do', wid my specs on, youk'n des say
to de congergashun, sorter familious like, 'Yer come ole man Remus wid
his hoss-pistol, an' ef dar's
"I might drop in, Brother Rastus, and then again I
mightn't; but when you does see me saunter in the door, with my
spectacles on, you can just say to the congregation, sort of
familious like, 'Here come old man Remus with his
horse-pistol, and if there's
har1880.2007.001.0215.jpg
much uv a skuffle 'roun' yer dis evenin' youer
gwineter year fum 'im.' Dat's me, an' dat's what you kin tell um. So
long! 'Member me to Sis Abby."
much of a skuffle around here this evening you're
going to here from him.' That's me, and that's what you can tell them. So
long! Remember me to Sis Abby."
III.
UNCLE REMUS AND THE SAVANNAH DARKEY.
The notable difference existing between the negroes in the interior of the cotton States and those on the seaboard—a difference that extends to habits and opinions as well as to dialect—has given rise to certain ineradicable prejudices which are quick to display themselves whenever an opportunity offers. These prejudices were forcibly, as well as ludicrously, illustrated in Atlanta recently. A gentleman from Savannah had been spending the summer in the mountains of north Georgia, and found it convenient to take along a body-servant. This body-servant was a very fine specimen of the average coast negro—sleek, well-conditioned, and consequential—disposed to regard with undisguised contempt everything and everybody not indigenous to the rice-growing region—and he paraded around the streets with quite a curious and critical air. Espying Uncle Remus languidly sunning himself on a corner, the Savannah darkey approached.
"Mornin', sah." "Morning, sir."
"I'm sorter up an' about," "I'm sort of up and about," responded Uncle Remus, carelessly and calmly. "How is you stannin' it?" "How is you standing it?"
har1880.2007.001.0216.jpg
"Tanky you, my helt mos' so-so. He mo' hot dun in
de mountain. Seem so lak man mus' git need [note * ]
Underneath. [back]
"In dis wi'ch?" "In this which?" inquired Uncle Remus, with a sudden affectation of interest.
"In dis pa'ts. In dis country. Da plenty in Sawanny." "In this parts. In this country. There are plenty in Savannah."
"Plenty whar?" "Plenty where?"
"Da plenty in Sawanny. I enty fer see no crab an' no oscher; en swimp, he no stay 'roun.' I lak some rice-bud now." "There are plenty in Savannah. I enty for see no crab and no oscher; and shrimp, he no stay around. I like some rice-bird now."
"Youer talkin' 'bout deze yer sparrers, w'ich dey er
all head, en 'lev'm un makes one mouffle, [note + ]
Mouthful. [back]
"Him po' country fer true," "Him po' country for true," commented the Savannah negro; "he no like Sawanny. Down da, we set need de shade an' eaty de rice-bud, an' de crab, an' de swimp tree time de day; an' de buckra man drinky him wine, an' smoky him seegyar all troo de night. Plenty fer eat an' not much fer wuk." "he no like Savannah. Down there, we set neath the shade and eat the rice-bird, and the crab, and the shrimp three time the day; and the buckra man drink him wine, and smoke him cigar all through the night. Plenty for eat and not much for work."
"Hit's mighty nice, I speck,"
"It's mighty nice, I expect,"
responded Uncle Remus, gravely.
"De nigger dat ain't hope up 'longer high feedin'
ain't got no grip. But up yer whar fokes is gotter scramble
"The nigger that ain't hope up along with
high feeding ain't got no grip. But up here where folks is got to
scramble
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ble 'roun' an' make der own livin', de vittles wat's
kumerlated widout enny sweatin' mos' allers gener'lly b'longs ter some
yuther man by rights. One hoe-cake an' a rasher er middlin' meat las's me
fum Sunday ter Sunday, an' I'm in a mighty big streak er luck w'en I gits
dat."
ble around and make their
own living, the vittles what's accumulated without any sweating almost
always generally belongs to some other man by rights. One
hoe-cake and a rasher of middling meat lasts me
from Sunday to Sunday, and I'm in a mighty big streak of luck when I gets
that."
The Savannah negro here gave utterance to a loud, contemptuous laugh, and began to fumble somewhat ostentatiously with a big brass watch-chain.
"But I speck I struck up wid a payin' job las' Chuseday," "But I expect I struck up with a paying job last Tuesday continued Uncle Remus, in a hopeful tone.
"Wey you gwan do?" "What you going do?"
"Oh, I'm a waitin' on a culled gemmun fum Savannah—wunner deze yer high livers you bin tellin' 'bout." "Oh, I'm a'waiting on a colored gentleman from Savannah—one of these here high livers you been telling about."
"How dat?" "How that?"
"I loant 'im two dollars," "I loaned him two dollars," responded Uncle Remus, grimly, "an' I'm a waitin' on 'im fer de money. Hit's wunner deze yer jobs w'at las's a long time." "and I'm a'waiting on him for the money. It's one of these here jobs what lasts a long time."
The Savannah negro went off after his rice-birds, while Uncle Remus leaned up against the wall and laughed until he was in imminent danger of falling down from sheer exhaustion.
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IV.
TURNIP SALAD AS A TEXT.
As Uncle Remus was going down the street recently he was accosted by several acquaintances.
"Heyo!" "Heyo!" said one, "here comes Uncle Remus. He look like he gwine fer ter set up a bo'din-house." "here comes Uncle Remus. He look like he going for to set up a boarding-house."
Several others bantered the old man, but he appeared to be in a good humor. He was carrying a huge basket of vegetables.
"How many er you boys," "How many of you boys," said he, as he put his basket down, "is done a han's turn dis day? En yit de week's done commence. I year talk er niggers dat's got money in de bank, but I lay hit ain't none er you fellers. Whar you speck you gwineter git yo' dinner, en how you speck you gwineter git 'long?" "is done a hands turn this day? And yet the week's done commence. I hear talk of niggers that's got money in the bank, but I lay it ain't none of you fellows. Where you expect you going to get your dinner, and how you expect you going to get along?"
"Oh, we sorter knocks 'roun' an' picks up a livin'," "Oh, we sort of knocks around and picks up a living," responded one.
"Dat's w'at make I say w'at I duz," "That's what make I say what I does," said Uncle Remus. "Folks go 'bout in de day-time an' makes a livin', an' you come 'long w'en dey er res'in' der bones an' picks it up. I ain't no han' at figgers, but I lay I k'n count up right yer in de san' en number up how menny days hit'll be 'fo' you'er cuppled on ter de chain-gang." "Folks go about in the day-time and makes a living, and you come along when they are resting their bones and picks it up. I ain't no hand at figures, but I lay I can count up right here in the sand and number up how many days it'll be before you're coupled on to the chain-gang."
"De ole man's holler'n now sho'," "The old man's hollering now sure," said one of the listeners, gazing with admiration on the venerable old darkey.
"I ain't takin' no chances 'bout vittles. Hit's proned
inter me fum de fus dat I got ter eat, en I knows dat I got
"I ain't taking no chances about vittles. It's
proned into me from the first that I got to eat,
and I knows that I got
har1880.2007.001.0219.jpg
fer ter grub fer w'at I gits. Hit's agin de mor'l law
fer niggers fer ter eat w'en dey don't wuk, an' w'en you see um
'pariently fattenin' on a'r, you k'n des bet dat ruinashun's gwine on
some'rs. I got mustard, en poke salid, en lam's quarter in dat baskit, en
me en my ole 'oman gwineter sample it. Ef enny you boys git a invite you
come, but ef you don't you better stay 'way. I gotter muskit out dar
wa't's used ter persidin' 'roun' whar dey's a cripple nigger. Don't you
fergit dat off'n yo' mine."
for to grub for what I gets. It's against the moral
law for niggers for to eat when they don't work, and when you see them
apparently fattening on air, you can just bet that ruination's going on
somewheres. I got mustard, and poke salad, and lamb's quarter in that
basket, and me and my old woman going to sample it. If any you boys get a
invite you come, but if you don't you better stay away. I got a musket
out there what's used to presiding around where they's a cripple nigger.
Don't you forget that off of your mind."
V.
A CONFESSION.
"Wat's dis yer I see, great big niggers gwine 'lopin' 'roun' town wid cakes 'n pies fer ter sell?" "What's this here I see, great big niggers going 'lopin' around town with cakes and pies for to sell?" asked Uncle Remus recently, in his most scornful tone.
"That's what they are doing," responded a young man; "that's the way they make a living."
"Dat w'at make I say w'at I duz—dat w'at keep me grum'lin' w'en I goes in cullud fokes s'ciety. Some niggers ain't gwine ter wuk nohow, an' hit's flingin' 'way time fer ter set enny chain-gang traps fer ter ketch um." "That what make I say what I does—that what keep me grumbling when I goes in colored folks's society. Some niggers ain't going to work nohow, and it's flinging away time for to set any chain-gang traps for to catch them."
"Well, now, here!" exclaimed the young man, in a dramatic tone, "what are you giving us now? Isn't it just as honest and just as regular to sell pies as it is to do any other kind of work?"
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"Tain't dat, boss," "It ain't that, boss," said the old man, seeing that he was about to be cornered; "tain't dat. Hit's de nas'ness un it w'at gits me." "it ain't that. It's the nas'ness of it what gets me."
"Oh, get out!"
"Dat's me, boss, up an' down. Ef dere's ruinashun ennywhar in de known wurril, she goes in de comp'ny uv a hongry nigger w'at's a totin' pies 'roun'. Sometimes w'en I git kotch wid emptiness in de pit er de stummuck, an' git ter fairly honin' arter sump'n' w'at got substance in it, den hit look like unto me dat I kin stan' flat-footed an' make more cle'r money eatin' pies dan I could if I wuz ter sell de las' one twix't dis an' Chrismus. An' de nigger w'at k'n trapes 'round wid pies and not git in no alley-way an' sample um, den I'm bleedzd ter say dat nigger outniggers me an' my fambly. So dar now!" "That's me, boss, up and down. If there's ruination anywhere in the known world, she goes in the company of a hungry nigger what's a'toting pies around. Sometimes when I get catch with emptiness in the pit of the stomach, and get to fairly honin' after something what got substance in it, then it look like unto me that I can stand flat-footed and make more clear money eating pies than I could if I was to sell the last one betwixt this and Christmas. And the nigger what can traipse around with pies and not get in no alley-way and sample them, then I'm bleedzd to say that nigger outniggers me and my family. So there now!"
VI.
UNCLE REMUS WITH THE TOOTHACHE.
When Uncle Remus put in an appearance one morning recently, his friends knew he had been in trouble. He had a red cotton handkerchief tied under his chin, and the genial humor that usually makes his aged face its dwelling-place had given way to an expression of grim melancholy. The young men about the office were inclined to chaff him, but his look of sullen resignation remained unchanged.
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"What revival did you attend last night?" inquired one.
"What was the color of the mule that did the hammering?" asked another.
"I always told the old man that a suburban chicken-coop would fall on him," remarked some one.
"A strange pig has been squealing in his ear," suggested some one else.
But Uncle Remus remained impassive. He seemed to have lost all interest in what was going on around him, and he sighed heavily as he seated himself on the edge of the trash-box in front of the office. Finally some one asked, in a sympathetic tone:
"What is the matter, old man? You look like you'd been through the mill."
"Now you'er knockin' at de back do' sho'. Ef I ain't bin thoo de mill sence day 'fo' yistiddy, den dey ain't no mills in de lan'. Ef wunner deze yer scurshun trains had runned over me I couldn't er bin wuss off. I bin trompin' 'roun' in de low-groun's now gwine on seventy-fi' year, but I ain't see no sich times ez dat w'at I done spe'unst now. Boss, is enny er you all ever rastled wid de toofache?" "Now you're knocking at the back door sure. If I ain't been through the mill since day before yesterday, then they ain't no mills in the land. If one of these here excursion trains had runned over me I couldn't have been worse off. I been tromping around in the low-grounds now going on seventy-five year, but I ain't see no such times as that what I done experienced now. Boss, is any of you all ever wrestled with the toothache?"
"Oh, hundreds of times! The toothache isn't anything."
"Den you des played 'roun' de aidges. You ain't had de
kine w'at kotch me on de underjaw. You mout a had a gum-bile, but you
ain't bin boddered wid de toofache. I wuz settin' up talkin' wid my ole
'oman, kinder puzzlin' roun' fer ter see whar de nex' meal's vittles wuz
a gwineter
"Then you just played around the edges. You ain't had
the kind what catch me on the underjaw. You might have had a
gum-bile, but you ain't been bothered with the toothache. I
was setting up talking with my old woman, kind of puzzling around for to
see where the next meal's vittles was a going to
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cum fum, an' I feel a little ache sorter crawlin' long
on my jaw-bone, kinder feelin' his way. But de ache don't stay long. He
sorter hankered 'roun' like, en den crope back whar he come fum. Bimeby I
feel 'im comin' agin, an' dis time hit look like he come up closer—kinder
skummishin' 'roun' fer ter see how de lan' lay. Den he went off.
Present'y I feel 'im comin', an' dis time hit look like he kyar'd de news
unto Mary, fer hit feel like der wuz anudder wun wid 'im. Dey crep' up
an' crep roun', an' den dey crope off. Bimeby dey come back, an' dis time
dey come like dey wuzen't 'fear'd er de s'roundin's, fer dey trot right
up unto de toof, sorter zamine it like, an' den trot all roun' it, like
deze yer circuous hosses. I sot dar mighty ca'm, but I spected dat
sump'n' wuz gwine ter happ'n."
come from, and I feel a little ache sort of crawling
long on my jaw-bone, kind of feeling his way. But the ache don't stay
long. He sort of hankered around like, and then crept back where he come
from. By and by I feel him coming again, and this time it look like he
come up closer—kind of skirmishing around for to see how the land lay.
Then he went off. Presently I feel him coming, and this time it look like
he carried the news unto Mary, for it feel like there was another one
with him. They crept up and crept around, and then they crept off. By and
by they come back, and this time they come like they wasn't afeard of the
suroundings, for they trot right up unto the tooth, sort of examine it
like, and then trot all around it, like these here
circuous horses. I sat there mighty calm, but I
suspected that something was going to happen."
"And it happened, did it?" asked some one in the group surrounding the old man.
"Boss, don't you fergit it,"
"Boss, don't you forget it,"
responded Uncle Remus, fervidly.
"W'en dem aches gallop back dey galloped fer ter stay,
an' dey wuz so mixed up dat I couldn't tell one fum de udder. All night
long dey racked an' dey galloped, an' w'en dey got tired er rackin' an'
gallopin', dey all cloze in on de ole toof an' thumped it an' gouged at
it twel it 'peared unto me dat dey had got de jaw-bone loosened up, an'
wuz tryin' fer ter fetch it up thoo de top er my head an' out at der back
er my neck. An' dey got wuss nex' day. Mars John, he seed I wuz
'stracted, an' he tole me fer ter go roun' yere an' git sump'n' put on
it, an' de drug man he 'lowed dat I better have 'er draw'd an' his wuds
wuzent more'n cole 'fo' wunner deze yer watchyoumaycollums—
"When them aches gallop back they galloped for to
stay, and they was so mixed up that I couldn't tell one from the other.
All night long they racked and they galloped, and when they got tired of
racking and galloping, they all close in on the old tooth and thumped it
and gouged at it til it appeared unto me that they had got the jaw-bone
loosened up, and was trying for to fetch it up through the top of my head
and out at the back of my neck. And they got worse next day. Master John,
he seed I was distracted, and he told me for to go around here and get
something put on it, and the drug man he allowed that I better have her
draw'd and his words wasn't more than cold before one of these
here what-you-may-call-thems—
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wunner deze dentis' mens—had retched fer it wid a pa'r
er tongs w'at don't tu'n loose w'en dey ketches a holt. Leas'ways dey
didn't wid me. You oughter seed dat toof, boss. Hit wuz wunner deze yer
fo'-prong fellers. Ef she'd a grow'd wrong eend out'ard, I'd a bin a bad
nigger long arter I jin'd de chu'ch. You year'd my ho'n!"
one of these dentist mens—had reached for it with a
pair of tongs what don't turn loose when they catches a'hold. Leastways
they didn't with me. You ought to seen that tooth, boss. It was one of
these here four-prong fellows. If she'd have growed wrong end outward,
I'd have been a bad nigger long after I joined the church. You heared my
horn!"
VII.
THE PHONOGRAPH.
"Unc Remus," asked a tall, awkward-looking negro, who was one of a crowd surrounding the old man, "wat's dish 'ere w'at dey calls de fonygraf—dish yer inst'ument w'at kin holler 'roun' like little chillun in de back yard?" "what's this here what they calls the phonograph—this here instrument what can holler around like little children in the back yard?"
"I ain't seed um," "I ain't seen them," said Uncle Remus, feeling in his pocket for a fresh chew of tobacco. "I ain't seed um, but I year talk un um. Miss Sally wuz a readin' in de papers las' Chuseday, an' she say dat's it's a mighty big watchyoumaycollum." "I ain't seen them, but I hear talk of them. Miss Sally was a'reading in the papers last Tuesday, and she say that's it's a mighty big what-you-may-call-them."
"A mighty big w'ich?" "A mighty big which?" asked one of the crowd.
"A mighty big w'atzisname,"
"A mighty big what's-his-name,"
answered Uncle Remus, cautiously.
"I wuzent up dar close to whar Miss Sarah wuz a
readin', but I kinder geddered in dat it wuz one er deze 'ere
w'atzisnames w'at you hollers inter one year an' it comes out er de
udder. Hit's mighty funny unter me how dese folks kin go an'
prognosticate der eckoes inter one er deze yer i'on boxes, an' dar hit'll
stay on twel de man
"I wasn't up there close to where Miss
Sarah was a'reading, but I
kind of gathered in that it was one of these here what's-his-names what
you hollers into one ear and it comes out of the other. It's mighty funny
unto me how these folks can go and prognosticate their echoes into one of
these here iron boxes, and there it'll stay on til the man
har1880.2007.001.0224.jpg
comes 'long an' tu'ns de handle an' let's de fuss come
pilin' out. Bimeby dey'll git ter makin' sho' nuff fokes, an' den dere'll
be a racket 'roun' here. Dey tells me dat it goes off like one er deze
yer torpedoes."
comes along and turns the handle and let's the fuss
come piling out. By and by they'll get to making sure enough folks, and
then there'll be a racket around here. They tells me that it goes off
like one of these here torpedoes."
"You year dat, don't you?" "You hear that, don't you?" said one or two of the younger negroes.
"Dat's w'at dey tells me," "That's what they tells me," continued Uncle Remus. "Dat's w'at dey sez. Hit's one er deze yer kinder w'atzisnames w'at sasses back w'en you hollers at it." "That's what they says. It's one of these here kind of what's-his-names what sasses back when you hollers at it."
"W'at dey fix um up fer, den?" "What they fix them up for, then?" asked one of the practical negroes.
"Dat's w'at I wanter know," "That's what I want to know," said Uncle Remus, contemplatively. "But dat's w'at Miss Sally wuz a readin' in de paper. All you gotter do is ter holler at de box, an' dar's yo' remarks. Dey goes in, an' dar dey er tooken and dar dey hangs on twel you shakes de box, an' den dey draps out des ez fresh ez deze yer fishes w'at you git fum Savannah, an' you ain't got time fer ter look at dere gills, nudder." "But that's what Miss Sally was a'reading in the paper. All you got to do is to holler at the box, and there's your remarks. They goes in, and there they are tooken and there they hangs on til you shakes the box, and then they drops out just as fresh as these here fishes what you get from Savannah, and you ain't got time for to look at their gills, neither."
VIII.
RACE IMPROVEMENT.
"Dere's a kind er limberness 'bout niggers dese days dat's mighty cu'us," "There's a kind of limberness about niggers these days that's mighty curious," remarked Uncle Remus yesterday, as he deposited a pitcher of fresh water upon the exchange table. "I notisses it in de alley-ways an' on de street-cornders. Dey er rackin' up, mon, deze yer cullud fokes is." "I notices it in the alley-ways and on the street-corners. They are racking up, man, these here colored folks is."
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"What are you trying to give us now?" inquired one of the young men, in a bilious tone.
"The old man's mind is wandering," said the society editor, smoothing the wrinkles out of his lavender kids.
Uncle Remus laughed. "I speck I is a gittin' mo frailer dan I wuz fo' de fahmin days wuz over, but I sees wid my eyes an' I years wid my year, same ez enny er dese yer young bucks w'at goes a gallopin' 'roun' huntin' up devilment, an' w'en I sees de limberness er dese yer cullud people, an' w'en I sees how dey er dancin' up, den I gits sorter hopeful. Dey er kinder ketchin' up wid me.'" "I expect I is a'getting more frailer than I was before the famine days was over, but I sees with my eyes and I hears with my ear, same as any of these here young bucks what goes a'galloping around hunting up devilment, and when I sees the limberness of these here colored people, and when I sees how they are dancing up, then I gets sort of hopeful. They are kind of catching up with me.'"
"How is that?"
"Oh, dey er movin'," "Oh, they are moving," responded Uncle Remus. "Dey er sorter comin' 'roun'. Dey er gittin' so dey b'leeve dat dey ain't no better dan de w'ite fokes. W'en freedom come out de niggers sorter got dere humps up, an' dey staid dat way, twel bimeby dey begun fer ter git hongry, an' den dey begun fer ter drap inter line right smartually; an' now," "They are sort of coming around. They are getting so they believe that they ain't no better than the white folks. When freedom come out the niggers sort of got their humps up, and they stayed that way, til by and by they begun for to get hungry, and then they begun for to drop into line right smartly; and now," continued the old man, emphatically, "dey er des ez palaverous ez dey wuz befo' de war. Dey er gittin' on solid groun', mon." "they are just as palaverous as they was before the war. They are getting on solid ground, man."
"You think they are improving, then?"
"Youer chawin' guv'nment now, boss. You slap de law
onter a nigger a time er two, an' larn 'im dat he's got fer to look atter
his own rashuns an' keep out'n udder fokes's chick'n-coops, an' sorter
coax 'im inter de idee dat he's got ter feed 'is own chilluns, an' I be
blessed ef you ain't got 'im on risin' groun'. An', mo'n dat, w'en he
gits holt er de fack dat a nigger k'n have yaller fever same
"You're chewing government now, boss. You slap the law
onto a nigger a time or two, and learn him that he's got for to look
after his own rations and keep out of other folks's chicken-coops, and
sort of coax him into the idea that he's got to feed his own children,
and I be blessed if you ain't got him on rising ground. And, more than
that, when he gets hold of the fact that a nigger can have yellow fever
same
har1880.2007.001.0226.jpg
ez w'ite folks, you done got 'im on de mo'ners' bench,
an' den ef you come down strong on de p'int dat he oughter stan' fas' by
de folks w'at hope him w'en he wuz in trouble de job's done. W'en you
does dat, ef you ain't got yo' han's on a new-made nigger, den my name
ain't Remus, an' ef dat name's bin changed I ain't seen her
abbertized."
as white folks, you done got him on the
mo'ners' bench, and then if you come down strong
on the point that he ought to stand fast by the folks what
hope him when he was in trouble the job's done. When you does
that, if you ain't got your hands on a new-made nigger, then my name
ain't Remus, and if that name's been changed I ain't seen her
advertised."
IX.
IN THE RÔLE OF A TARTAR.
A Charleston negro who was in Atlanta on the Fourth of July made a mistake. He saw Uncle Remus edging his way through the crowd, and thought he knew him.
"Howdy, Daddy Ben?" the stranger exclaimed. "I tink I nubber see you no mo'. Wey you gwan? He hot fer true, ain't he?" "I think I never see you no more. Where you going? It's hot for true, ain't it?"
"Daddy who?" asked Uncle Remus, straightening himself up with dignity. "W'ich?" "Which?"
"I know you in Charl'son, an' den in Sewanny. I spec I dun grow way frum 'membrance." "I know you in Charleston, and then in Savannah. I expect I done grow way from remembrance."
"You knowed me in Charlstun, and den in Savanny?" "You knowed me in Charleston, and then in Savannah?"
"He been long time, ain't he, Daddy Ben?" "It been long time, ain't it, Daddy Ben?"
"Dat's w'at's a pesterin' un me. How much you reckon you know'd me?" "That's what's a'pestering of me. How much you reckon you knowed me?"
"He good while pas'; when I wer' pickaninny. He long time ago. Wey you gwan, Daddy Ben?" "It good while past; when I were picaninny. It long time ago. Where you going, Daddy Ben?"
"W'at does you season your recollection wid fer ter make it hole on so?" "What does you season your recollection with for to make it hold on so?" inquired the old man.
har1880.2007.001.0227.jpg
"I dunno. He stick hese'f. I see you comin' 'long 'n I say 'Dey Daddy Ben.' I tink I see you no mo', an' I shaky you by de han'. Wey you gwan? Dey no place yer wey we git wine?" "I don't know. It stick itself. I see you coming along and I say 'They Daddy Ben.' I think I see you no more, and I shake you by the hand. Where you going? They no place here where we get wine?"
Uncle Remus stared at the strange darkey curiously for a moment, and then he seized him by the arm.
"Come yer, son, whar dey ain't no folks an' lemme drap some Jawjy 'intment in dem years er yone. Youer mighty fur ways fum home, an' you wanter be a lookin' out fer yo'se'f. Fus and fo'mus, youer thumpin' de wrong watermillion. Youer w'isslin' up de wrong chube. I ain't tromped roun' de country much. I ain't bin to Charlstun an' needer is I tuck in Savanny; but you couldn't rig up no game on me dat I wouldn't tumble on to it de minit I laid my eyeballs on you. W'en hit come ter dat I'm ole man Tumbler, fum Tumblersville—l is dat. Hit takes one er deze yer full-blooded w'ite men fur ter trap my jedgment. But w'en a nigger comes a jabberin' 'roun' like he got a mouf full er rice straw, he ain't got no mo' chance 'long side er me dan a sick sparrer wid a squinch-owl. You got ter travel wid a circus 'fo' you gits away wid me. You better go 'long an' git yo' kyarpet-sack and skip de town. Youer de freshest nigger w'at I seen yit." "Come here, son, where they ain't no folks and let me drop some Georgia ointment in them ears of yours. You're mighty far ways from home, and you want to be a'looking out for yourself. First and foremost, you're thumping the wrong watermelon. You're whistling up the wrong tube. I ain't tromped around the country much. I ain't been to Charleston and neither is I took in Savannah; but you couldn't rig up no game on me that I wouldn't tumble on to it the minute I laid my eyeballs on you. When it come to that I'm old man Tumbler, from Tumblersville—l is that. It takes one of these here full-blooded white men for to trap my judgment. But when a nigger comes a'jabbering around like he got a mouth full of rice straw, he ain't got no more chance along side of me than a sick sparrow with a squinch-owl. You got to travel with a circus before you gets away with me. You better go along and get your carpet-sack and skip the town. You're the freshest nigger what I seen yet."
The Charleston negro passed on just as a policeman came up.
"Boss, you see dat smart Ellick?" "Boss, you see that smart Aleck?"
"Yes; what's the matter with him?"
"He's one er deze yer scurshun niggers from Charlstun.
I seed you a stannin' over agin de cornder yander,
"He's one of these here excursion niggers from
Charleston. I seed you a'standing over against the corner yonder,
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and if that nigger'd a drawed his monty cards on me, I
was a going to holler for you. Would youer come, boss?"
and if that nigger'd have drawed his monty
cards on me, I was a'going to holler for you. Would you've come,
boss?"
"Why, certainly, Uncle Remus."
"Dat's w'at I 'lowd. Little more'n he'd a bin aboard er de wrong waggin. Dat's wat he'd a bin." "That's what I allowed. Little more and he'd have been aboard of the wrong wagon. That's what he'd have been."
X.
A CASE OF MEASLES.
"You've been looking like you were rather under the weather for the past week or two, Uncle Remus," said a gentleman to the old man.
"You'd be sorter puny, too, boss, if you'der bin whar I bin." "You'd be sort of puny, too, boss, if you'd have been where I been."
"Where have you been?"
"'Pear ter me like ev'eybody done year 'bout dat. Dey ain't no ole nigger my age an' size dat's had no rattliner time dan I is." "'Appear to me like everybody done hear about that. They ain't no old nigger my age and size that's had no time than I is."
"A kind of picnic?"
"Go 'long, boss! w'at you speck I be doin' sailin' 'roun' ter dese yer cullud picnics? Much mo' an' I wouldn't make bread by wukkin fer't, let 'lone follerin' up a passel er boys an' gals all over keration. Boss, ain't you year 'bout it, sho' 'nuff?" "Go along, boss! what you expect I be doing sailing around to these here colored picnics? Much more and I wouldn't make bread by working for it, let alone following up a passel of boys and gals all over creation. Boss, ain't you hear about it, sure enough?"
"I haven't, really. What was the matter?"
"I got strucken wid a sickness, an' she hit de ole nigger a joe-darter 'fo' she tu'n 'im loose." "I got stricken with a sickness, and she hit the old nigger a joe-darter before she turn him loose."
"What kind of sickness?"
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"Hit look sorter cu'ous, boss, but ole an' steddy ez I is, I tuck'n kotch de meezles." "It look sort of curious, boss, but old and steady as I is, I took and catch the measles."
"Oh, get out! You are trying to get up a sensation."
"Hit's a natal fack, boss, I declar' ter grashus ef 'tain't. Dey sorter come on wid a cole, like—leas'ways dat's how I commence fer ter suffer, an' den er koff got straddle er de cole—one deze yer koffs wa't look like hit goes ter de foundash'n. I kep' on linger'n' 'roun' sorter keepin' one eye on de rheumatiz an' de udder on de distemper, twel, bimeby, I begin fer ter feel de trestle-wuk give way, an' den I des know'd dat I wuz gwineter gitter racket. I slipt inter bed one Chuseday night, an' I never slip out no mo' fer mighty nigh er mont'. "It's a natural fact, boss, I declare to gracious if it ain't. They sort of come on with a cold, like—leastways that's how I commence for to suffer, and then a cough got straddle of the cold—one these here coughs what look like it goes to the foundation. I kept on lingering around sort of keeping one eye on the rheumatism and the other on the distemper, til, by and by, I begin for to feel the trestle-work give way, and then I just knowed that I was going to get a racket. I slipped into bed one Tuesday night, and I never slip out no more for mighty nigh a month.
"Nex' mornin' de meezles 'd done kivered me, an' den ef I didn't git dosted by de ole 'oman I'm a Chinee. She gimme back rashuns er sassafac tea. I des natally hankered an' got hongry atter water, an' ev'y time I sing out fer water I got b'ilin' hot sassafac tea. Hit got so dat w'en I wake up in de mornin' de ole 'oman 'd des come 'long wid a kittle er tea an' fill me up. Dey tells me 'roun' town dat chilluns don't git hurted wid de meezles, w'ich ef dey don't I wanter be a baby de nex' time dey hits dis place. All dis yer meezles bizness is bran'-new ter me. In ole times, 'fo' de wah, I ain't heer tell er no seventy-fi'-year-ole nigger grapplin' wid no meezles. Dey ain't ketchin' no mo', is dey, boss?" "Next morning the measles had done covered me, and then if I didn't get dosted by the old woman I'm a Chinese. She give me back rations of sassafrass tea. I just naturally hankered and got hungry after water, and every time I sing out for water I got boiling hot sassafrass tea. It got so that when I wake up in the morning the old woman would just come along with a kettle of tea and fill me up. They tells me around town that children don't get hurted with the measles, which if they don't I want to be a baby the next time they hits this place. All this here measles business is brand-new to me. In old times, before the war, I ain't hear tell of no seventy-five-year-old nigger grappling with no measles. They ain't catching no more, is they, boss?"
"Oh, no—I suppose not."
"'Kaze ef dey is, youk'n des put my name down wid de migrashun niggers." "'Cause if they is, you can just put my name down with the migration niggers."
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XI.
THE EMIGRANTS.
When Uncle Remus went down to the passenger depot one morning recently, the first sight that caught his eye was an old negro man, a woman, and two children sitting in the shade near the door of the baggage-room. One of the children was very young, and the quartet was altogether ragged and forlorn-looking. The sympathies of Uncle Remus were immediately aroused. He approached the group by forced marches, and finally unburdened his curiosity:
"Whar is you m'anderin' unter, pard?" "Where is you meandering unto, pard?"
The old negro, who seemed to be rather suspicious, looked at Uncle Remus coolly, and appeared to be considering whether he should make any reply. Finally, however, he stretched himself and said:
"We er gwine down in de naberhoods er Tallypoosy, an' we ain't makin' no fuss 'bout it, nudder." "We are going down in the neighborhoods of Tallapoosa, and we ain't making no fuss about it, neither."
"I disremember," said Uncle Remus, thoughtfully, "whar Tallypoosy is." "where Tallapoosa is."
"Oh, hit's out yan," "Oh, it's out yan," replied the old man, motioning his head as if it was just beyond the iron gates of the depot.
"Hit's down in Alabam. When we git dar, maybe we'll go on twel we gits ter Massasip." "It's down in Alabama. When we get there, maybe we'll go on til we gets to Mississippi."
"Is you got enny folks out dar?" "Is you got any folks out there?" inquired Uncle Remus.
"None dat I knows un." "None that I knows of."
har1880.2007.001.0231.jpg
"An' youer takin' dis 'oman an' deze chillun out dar whar dey dunno nobody? Whar's yo' perwisions?" "And you're taking this woman and these children out there where they don't know nobody? Where's your provisions?" eying a chest with a rope around it.
"Dem's our bed-cloze," "Them's our bed-clothes," the old negro explained, noticing the glance of Uncle Remus. "All de vittles what we got we e't 'fo' we started." "All the vittles what we got we ate before we started."
"An' you speck ter retch dar safe an' soun'? Whar's yo' ticket?" "And you expect to reach there safe and sound? Where's your ticket?"
"Ain't got none. De man say ez how dey'd pass us thoo. I gin a man a fi'-dollar bill 'fo' I lef' Jonesboro, an' he sed dat settled it." "Ain't got none. The man say as how they'd pass us through. I give a man a five-dollar bill before I left Jonesboro, and he said that settled it."
"Lemme tell you dis," "Let me tell you this," said Uncle Remus, straightening up indignantly: "you go an' rob somebody an' git on de chain-gang, an' let de 'oman scratch 'roun' yer an' make 'er livin'; but don't you git on dem kyars—don't you do it. Yo' bes' holt is de chain-gang. You kin make yo' livin' dar w'en you can't make it nowhars else. But don't you git on dem kyars. Ef you do, youer gone nigger. Ef you ain't got no money fer ter walk back wid, you better des b'il' yo' nes' right here. I'm a-talkin' wid de bark on. I done seed deze yer Arkinsaw emmygrants come lopein' back, an' some un 'em didn't have rags nuff on 'em fer ter hide dere nakidness. You leave dat box right whar she is, an' let de 'oman take wun young un an' you take de udder wun, an' den you git in de middle er de big road an' pull out fer de place whar you come fum. I'm preachin' now." "you go and rob somebody and get on the chain-gang, and let the woman scratch around here and make her living; but don't you get on them cars—don't you do it. Your best holt is the chain-gang. You can make your living there when you can't make it nowheres else. But don't you get on them cars. If you do, you're gone nigger. If you ain't got no money for to walk back with, you better just build your nest right here. I'm a-talking with the bark on. I done seen these here Arkansas emigrants come lopein' back, and some of them didn't have rags enough on them for to hide their nakedness. You leave that box right where she is, and let the woman take one young un and you take the other one, and then you get in the middle of the big road and pull out for the place where you come from. I'm preaching now."
Those who watched say the quartet didn't take the cars.
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XII.
AS A MURDERER.
Uncle Remus met a police officer recently.
"You ain't hear talk er no dead nigger nowhar dis mawnin', is you, boss?" "You ain't hear talk of no dead nigger nowhere this morning, is you, boss?" asked the old man, earnestly.
"No," replied the policeman, reflectively. "No, I believe not. Have you heard of any?"
"Pears unter me dat I come mighty nigh gittin' some news 'bout dat size, and dats w'at I'm a huntin' fer. Bekaze ef dey er foun' a stray nigger layin' 'roun' loose, wid 'is bref gone, den I wanter go home an' git my brekfus, an' put on some clean cloze, an' 'liver myse'f up ter wunner deze yer jestesses er de peace, an' git a f'ar trial." "Appears unto me that I come mighty nigh getting some news about that size, and that's what I'm a'hunting for. Because if they have found a stray nigger laying around loose, with his breath gone, then I want to go home and get my breakfast, and put on some clean clothes, and deliver myself up to one of these here justices of the peace, and get a fair trail."
"Why, have you killed anybody?"
"Dat's wat's I'm a 'quirin' inter now, but I wouldn't be sustonished ef I ain't laid a nigger out some'rs on de subbubs. Hit's done got so it's agin de law fer ter bus' loose an' kill a nigger, ain't it, boss?" "That what I'm inquiring into now, but I wouldn't be astonished if I ain't laid a nigger out on the . It's done got so it's against the law for to bust loose and kill a nigger, ain't it, boss?"
"Well, I should say so. You don't mean to tell me that you have killed a colored man, do you?"
"I speck I is, boss. I speck I done gone an' done it dis time, sho'. Hit's bin sorter growin' on me, an' it come ter a head dis mawnin', less my name ain't Remus, an' dat's w'at dey bin er callin' me sence I wuz ole er 'nuff fer ter scratch myse'f wid my lef' han'." "I expect I is, boss. I expect I done gone and done it this time, sure. It's been sort of growing on me, and it come to a head this morning, unless my name ain't Remus, and that's what they been a'calling me since I was old enough for to scratch myself with my left hand."
"Well, if you've killed a man, you'll have some fun, sure enough. How was it?"
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"Hit wuz dis way, boss: I wuz layin' in my bed dis mawnin' sorter ruminatin 'roun', when de fus news I know'd I year a fus 'mong de chickens, an' den my brissels riz. I done had lots er trubble wid dem chickens, an' w'en I years wun un um squall my ve'y shoes comes ontied. So I des sorter riz up an' retch fer my ole muskit, and den I crope out er de back do', an' w'atter you reckin I seed?" "It was this way, boss: I was laying in my bed this morning sort of ruminating around, when the first news I knowed I hear a fuss among the chickens, and then my rose. I done had lots of trouble with them chickens, and when I hears one of them squall my very shoes comes untied. So I just sort of rose up and reached for my old musket, and then I crept out of the back door, and what do you reckon I seed?"
"I couldn't say."
"I seed de biggest, blackest nigger dat you ever laid eyes on. He shined like de paint on 'im was fresh. He hed done grabbed fo'er my forwardes' pullets. I crope up nigh de do', an' hollered an' axed 'im how he wuz a gittin' on, an' den he broke, an' ez he broke I jammed de gun in de small er his back and banged aloose. He let a yell like forty yaller cats a courtin', an' den he broke. You ain't seed no nigger hump hisse'f like dat nigger. He tore down de well shelter and fo' pannils er fence, an' de groun' look like wunner deze yer harrycanes had lit dar and fanned up de yeath." "I seed the biggest, blackest nigger that you ever laid eyes on. He shined like the paint on him was fresh. He had done grabbed four of my pullets. I crept up nigh the door, and hollered and asked him how he was a'getting on, and then he broke, and as he broke I jammed the gun in the small of his back and . He let a yell like forty yellow cats a'courting, and then he broke. You ain't seen no nigger hump hisself like that nigger. He tore down the well shelter and four panels of fence, and the ground look like one of these here hurricanes had lit there and fanned up the earth."
"Why, I thought you killed him?"
"He bleedzed ter be dead, boss. Ain't I put de gun right on im? Seem like I feel 'im give way w'en she went off." "He to be dead, boss. Ain't I put the gun right on him? Seem like I feel him give way when she went off."
"Was the gun loaded?"
"Dat's w'at my ole 'oman say. She had de powder in dar, sho', but I disremember wedder I put de buckshot in, er wedder I lef' um out. Leas'ways, I'm gwineter call on wunner deze yer jestosses. So long, boss." "That's what my old woman say. She had the powder in there, sure, but I disremember whether I put the buckshot in, or whether I left them out. Leastways, I'm going to call on one of these here justices. So long, boss."
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XIII.
HIS PRACTICAL VIEW OF THINGS.
"Brer Remus, is you heern tell er deze doin's out yer in de udder eend er town?" "Brother Remus, is you heard tell of these doings out here in the other end of town?" asked a colored deacon of the church the other day.
"W'at doin's is dat, Brer Ab?" "What doings is that, Brer Brother Ab?"
"Deze yer signs an' wunders whar dat cullud lady died day 'fo' yistiddy. Mighty quare goin's on out dar, Brer Remus, sho's you bawn." "These here signs and wonders where that colored lady died day before yesterday. Mighty queer goings on out there, Brother Remus, sure as you born."
"Sperrits?" "Spirits?" inquired Uncle Remus, sententiously.
"Wuss'n dat, Brer Remus. Some say dat jedgment-day ain't fur off, an' de folks is flockin' 'roun' de house a hollerin' an' a shoutin' des like dey wuz in er revival. In de winder glass dar you kin see de flags a flyin', an' Jacob's lather is dar, an' dar's writin' on de pane w'at no man can't read—leas'wise dey ain't none read it yit." "Worse than that, Brer Remus. Some say that judgment day ain't far off, and the folks is flocking around the house a'hollering and a'shouting just like they was in a revival. In the window glass there you can see the flags a'flying, and Jacob's ladder is there, and there's writing on the pane what no man can't read—leastwise they ain't none read it yet."
"W'at kinder racket is dis youer givin' un me now, Brer Ab?" "What kind of racket is this you're giving of me now, Brother Ab?
"I done bin dar, Brer Remus; I done seed um wid bofe my eyes. Cullud lady what wuz intranced done woke up an' say dey ain't much time fer ter tarry. She say she meet er angel in de road, an' he p'inted straight fer de mornin' star, an' tell her fer ter prepar'. Hit look mighty cu'us, Brer Remus." "I done been there, Brother Remus; I done seen them with both my eyes. Colored lady what was entranced done woke up and say they ain't much time for to tarry. She say she meet a angel in the road, and he pointed straight for the morning star, and tell her for to prepare. It look mighty curious, Brother Remus."
"Cum down ter dat, Brer Ab,"
"Come down to that, Brother Ab,"
said Uncle Remus, wiping his spectacles carefully, and readjusting them—
"cum down ter dat, an' dey ain't nuthin' dat ain't
cu'us. I ain't no spishus nigger myse'f, but I 'spizes fer ter year
"come down to that, and they ain't nothing that ain't
curious. I ain't no suspicious nigger myself, but I for to
hear
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dogs a howlin' an' squinch-owls havin' de ager out in
de woods, an' w'en a bull goes a bellerin' by de house den my bones git
cole an' my flesh commences fer ter creep; but w'en it comes ter deze yer
sines in de a'r an' deze yer sperrits in de woods, den I'm out—den I'm
done. I is, fer a fack. I bin livin' yer more'n seventy year, an' I year
talk er niggers seein' ghos'es all times er night an' all times er day,
but I ain't never seed none yit; an' deze yer flags an' Jacob's lathers,
I ain't seed dem, nudder."
dogs a'howling and
having the out in the woods, and when a bull goes a'bellowing
by the house then my bones get cold and my flesh commences for to creep;
but when it comes to these here signs in the air and these here spirits
in the woods, then I'm out—then I'm done. I is, for a fact. I been living
here more than seventy year, and I hear talk of niggers seeing ghosts all
times of night and all times of day, but I ain't never seen none yet; and
these here flags and Jacob's ladders, I ain't seen them, neither."
"Dey er dar, Brer Remus." "They are there, Brother Remus."
"Hit's des like I tell you, Brer Ab. I ain't 'sputin 'bout it, but I ain't seed um, an' I don't take no chances deze days on dat w'at I don't see, an' dat w'at I sees I got ter 'zamine mighty close. Lemme tell you dis, Brer Ab: don't you let deze sines onsettle you. W'en old man Gabrile toot his ho'n, he ain't gwinter hang no sine out in de winder-panes, an' when ole Fadder Jacob lets down dat lather er his'n you'll be mighty ap' fer ter hear de racket. An' don't you bodder wid jedgment-day. Jedgment-day is lierbul fer ter take keer un itse'f." "It's just like I tell you, Brother Ab. I ain't disputing about it, but I ain't seen them, and I don't take no chances these days on that what I don't see, and that what I sees I got to examine mighty close. Let me tell you this, Brother Ab: don't you let these signs unsettle you. When old man Gabriel toot his horn, he ain't going to hang no sign out in the window-panes, and when old Father Jacob lets down that ladder of his you'll be mighty apt for to hear the racket. And don't you bother with judgment-day. Judgment-day is liable for to take care of itself."
"Dat's so, Brer Remus." "That's so, Brother Remus."
"Hit's bleedzed ter be so, Brer Ab. Hit don't bodder me. Hit's done got so now dat w'en I gotter pone er bread, an' a rasher er bacon, an' nuff grease fer ter make gravy, I ain't keerin' much w'edder fokes sees ghos'es er no." "It's to be so, Brother Ab. It don't bother me. It's done got so now that when I got a of bread, and a ration of bacon, and enough grease for to make gravy, I ain't caring much whether folks sees ghosts or no."
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XIV.
THAT DECEITFUL JUG.
Uncle Remus was in good humor one evening recently when he dropped casually into the editorial room of "The Constitution," as has been his custom for the past year or two. He had a bag slung across his shoulder, and in the bag was a jug. The presence of this humble but useful vessel in Uncle Remus's bag was made the occasion for several suggestive jokes at his expense by the members of the staff, but the old man's good humor was proof against all insinuations.
"Dat ar jug's bin ter wah, mon. Hit's wunner deze yer ole timers. I got dat jug down dar in Putmon County w'en Mars 'Lisha Perryman wuz a young man, an' now he's done growed up, an' got ole an' died, an' his chilluns is growed up an' dey kin count dere gran'chilluns, an' yit dar's dat jug des ez lively an' ez lierbul fer ter kick up devilment ez w'at she wus w'en she come fum de foundry." "That there jug's been to war, man. It's one of these here old timers. I got that jug down there in Putnam County when Master 'Lisha Perryman was a young man, and now he's done growed up, and got old and died, and his children is growed up and they can count their grandchildren, and yet there's that jug just as lively and as liable for to kick up devilment as what she was when she come from the foundry."
"That's the trouble," said one of the young men. "That's the reason we'd like to know what's in it now."
"Now youer gittin' on ma'shy groun',"
"Now you're getting on ground,"
replied Uncle Remus.
"Dat's de p'int. Dat's w'at make me say w'at I duz. I
bin knowin' dat jug now gwine on sixty-fi' year, an' de jug w'at's more
seetful dan dat jug ain't on de top-side er de worrul. Dar she sets,"
"That's the point. That's what make me say what I
does. I been knowing that jug now going on sixty-five year, and the jug
what's more deceitful than that jug ain't on the top-side of the world.
There she sets,"
continued the old man, gazing at it reflectively,
"dar she sets dez ez natchul ez er ambertype, an' yit
whar's de man w'at kin tell w'at kinder
"there she sets just as natural as
, and yet where's the man what can tell what kind
of
har1880.2007.001.0237.jpg
confab she's a gwineter carry on w'en dat corn-cob is
snatched outen 'er mouf? Dat jug is mighty seetful, mon."
confab she's a'going to carry on when that corn-cob is
snatched out of her mouth? That jug is mighty deceitful, man."
"Well, it don't deceive any of us up here," remarked the agricultural editor, dryly. "We've seen jugs before."
"I boun' you is, boss; I boun' you is. But you ain't seed no seetful jug like dat. Dar she sets a bellyin out an' lookin' mighty fat an' full, an' yit she'd set dar a bellyin' out ef dere wuzent nuthin' but win' under dat stopper. You knows dat she ain't got no aigs in her, ner no bacon, ner no grits, ner no termartusses, ner no shellotes, an' dat's 'bout all you duz know. Dog my cats ef de seetfulness er dat jug don't git away wid me," "I bound you is, boss; I bound you is. But you ain't seen no deceitful jug like that. There she sets a'bellying out and looking mighty fat and full, and yet she'd set there a'bellying out if there wasn't nothing but wind under that stopper. You knows that she ain't got no eggs in her, nor no bacon, nor no grits, nor no , nor no shallots, and that's about all you does know. Dog my cats if the deceitfulness of that jug don't get away with me," continued Uncle Remus, with a chuckle. "I wuz comin' 'cross de bridge des now, an' Brer John Henry seed me wid de bag slung onter my back, an' de jug in it, an' he ups an' sez, sezee: "I was coming across the bridge just now, and Brother John Henry seed me with a bag slung onto my back, and the jug in it, and he ups and says, says he:
"'Heyo, Brer Remus, ain't it gittin' late for watermillions?' "', Brother Remus, ain't it getting late for watermelons?'
"Hit wuz de seetfulness er dat jug. If Brer John Henry know'd de color er dat watermilion, I speck he'd snatch me up 'fo' de confunce. I 'clar' ter grashus ef dat jug ain't a caution!" "It was the deceitfulness of that jug. If Brother John Henry knowed the color of that watermelon, I expect he'd snatch me up before the . I declare to gracious if that jug ain't a caution!"
"I suppose it's full of molasses now," remarked one of the young men, sarcastically.
"Hear dat!" "Hear that!" exclaimed Uncle Remus, triumphantly— "hear dat! W'at I tell you? I sed dat jug wuz seetful, an' I sticks to it. I bin knowin' dat—" "hear that! What I tell you? I said that jug was deceitful, and I sticks to it. I been knowing that—"
"What has it got in it ?" broke in some one; "molasses, kerosene, or train-oil?"
har1880.2007.001.0238.jpg
"Well, I lay she's loaded, boss. I ain't shuk her up sence I drapt in, but I lay she's loaded." "Well, I lay she's loaded, boss. I ain't shook her up since I dropped in, but I lay she's loaded."
"Yes," said the agricultural editor, "and it's the meanest bug-juice in town—regular sorghum skimmings."
"Dat's needer yer ner dar," "That's neither here nor there," responded Uncle Remus. "Po' fokes better be fixin' up for Chrismus now w'ile ra-shuns is cheap. Dat's me. W'en I year Miss Sally gwine 'bout de house w'isslin' 'W'en I k'n Read my Titles Cler,'—an' w'en I see de martins swawmin' atter sundown—an' w'en I year de peckerwoods confabbin' tergedder dese moonshiny nights in my een' er town—den I knows de hot wedder's a breakin' up, an' I knows it's 'bout time fer po' fokes fer ter be rastlin' 'roun' and huntin' up dere rashuns. Dat's me, up an' down." "Poor folks better be fixing up for Christmas now while rations is cheap. That's me. When I hear Miss Sally going about the house whistling 'When I can Read my Title Clear,'—and when I see the martins swarming after sundown—and when I hear the peckerwoods confabbing together these nights in my end of town—then I knows the hot weather's a'breaking up, and I knows it's about time for poor folks for to be wrestling around and hunting up their rations. That's me, up and down."
"Well, we are satisfied. Better go and hire a hall," remarked the sporting editor, with a yawn. "If you are engaged in a talking match you have won the money. Blanket him somebody, and take him to the stable."
"An' w'at's mo'," "And what's more," continued the old man, scorning to notice the insinuation, "dough I year Miss Sally w'isslin', an' de peckerwoods a chatterin', I ain't seein' none er deze yer loafin' niggers fixin' up fer ter 'migrate. Dey kin holler Kansas all 'roun' de naberhood, but ceppin' a man come 'long an' spell it wid greenbacks, he don't ketch none er deze yer town niggers. You year me, dey ain't gwine." "though I hear Miss Sally whistling, and the peckerwoods a'chattering, I ain't seeing none of these here loafing niggers fixing up for to emigrate. They can holler Kansas all around the neighborhood, but excepting a man come along and spell it with greenbacks, he don't catch none of these here town niggers. You hear me, they ain't going."
"Stand him up on the table," said the sporting editor; "give him room."
"Better go down yer ter de calaboose, an' git some
"Better go down here to the calaboose, and get
some
har1880.2007.001.0239.jpg
news fer ter print,"
news for to print,"
said Uncle Remus, with a touch of irony in his tone.
"Some new nigger mighter broke inter jail."
"Some new nigger might have broke into jail."
"You say the darkeys are not going to emigrate this year?" inquired the agricultural editor, who is interested in these things.
"Shoo! dat dey ain't! I done seed an' I knows." " that they ain't! I done seen and I knows."
"Well, how do you know?"
"How you tell w'en crow gwineter light? Niggers bin prom'nadin' by my house all dis summer, holdin' dere heads high up an' de w'ites er dere eyeballs shinin' in de sun. Dey wuz too bigitty fer ter look over de gyardin' palin's. 'Long 'bout den de wedder wuz fetchin' de nat'al sperrits er turkentime outen de pine-trees an' de groun' wuz fa'rly smokin' wid de hotness. Now dat it's gittin' sorter airish in de mornin's, dey don't 'pear like de same niggers. Dey done got so dey'll look over in de yard, an' nex' news you know dey'll be tryin' fer ter scrape up 'quaintence wid de dog. W'en dey passes now dey looks at de chicken-coop an' at de tater-patch. W'en you see niggers gittin' dat familious, you kin 'pen' on dere campin' wid you de ballunce er de season. Day 'fo' yistiddy I kotch one un um lookin' over de fence at my shoats, an' I sez, sez I: "How you tell when crow going to light? Niggers been promenading by my house all this summer, holding their heads high up and the whites of their eyeballs shining in the sun. They was too biggity for to look over the garden . Along about then the weather was fetching the natural spirits of turpentine out of the pine trees and the ground was fairly smoking with the hotness. Now that it's getting sort of in the mornings, they don't appear like the same niggers. They done got so they'll look over in the yard, and next news you know they'll be trying for to scrape up acquaintance with the dog. When they passes now they looks at the chicken coop and at the tater-patch. When you see niggers getting that , you can depend on their camping with you the balance of the season. Day before yesterday I catch one of them looking over the fence at my shoats, and I says, says I:
"'Duz you wanter purchis dem hogs?' "'Does you want to purchase them hogs?'
"'Oh, no,' seezee, 'I wuz des lookin' at dere p'ints.' "'Oh no,' says he, "I was just looking at their .'
"'Well, dey ain't pintin' yo' way,' sez I, 'an, fuddermo,' ef you don't bodder 'longer dem hogs dey ain't gwineter clime outer dat pen an' 'tack you, nudder,' sez I. "'Well, they ain't your way,' says I, 'and, furthermore, if you don't bother along with them hogs they ain't going to climb out of that pen and attack you, neither,' says I.
har1880.2007.001.0240.jpg
"An' I boun'," "And I bound," continued Uncle Remus, driving the corn-cob stopper a little tighter in his deceitful jug and gathering up his bag— "an' I boun' dat my ole muskit'll go off 'tween me an' dat same nigger yit, an' he'll be at de bad een', an' dis seetful jug'll 'fuse ter go ter de funer'l." "and I bound that my old musket'll go off between me and that same nigger yet, and he'll be at the bad end, and this deceitful jug'll refuse to go to the funeral."
XV.
THE FLORIDA WATERMELON.
"Look yer, boy," "Look here, boy," said Uncle Remus yesterday, stopping near the railroad crossing on Whitehall Street, and gazing ferociously at a small colored youth; "look yer, boy, I'll "look here, boy, I'll lay you out flat ef you come flingin' yo' watermillion rimes under my foot—you watch ef I don't. You k'n play yo' pranks on deze yer w'ite fokes, but w'en you come a cuttin' up yo' capers roun' me you'll lan' right in de middle uv er spell er sickness—now you mine w'at I tell you. An' I ain't gwine fer ter put up wid none er yo' sassness nudder—let 'lone flingin' watermillion rimes whar I kin git mixt up wid um. I done had nuff watermillions yistiddy an' de day befo'." lay you flat if you come flinging your watermelon rinds under my foot—you watch if I don't. You can play your pranks on these here white folks, but when you come a'cutting up your capers round me you'll land right in the middle of a spell of sickness—now you mind what I tell you. And I ain't going for to put up with none of your neither—let alone flinging watermelon rinds where I can get mixed up with them. I done had enough watermelons yesterday and the day before."
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"How was that, Uncle Remus?" asked a gentleman standing near.
"Hit wuz sorter like dis, boss. Las' Chuseday, Mars John he fotch home two er deze yer Flurridy watermillions, an him an' Miss Sally sot down fer ter eat um. Mars John an' Miss Sally ain't got nuthin' dat's too good fer me, an' de fus news I know'd Miss Sally wuz a hollerin fer Remus. I done smelt de watermillion on de a'r, an' I ain't got no better sense dan fer ter go w'en I years w'ite fokes a hollerin—I larnt dat w'en I wa'n't so high. Leas'ways I galloped up ter de back po'ch, an' dar sot de watermillions des ez natchul ez ef dey'd er bin raised on de ole Spivey place in Putmon County. Den Miss Sally, she cut me off er slishe—wunner deze yer ongodly slishes, big ez yo' hat, an' I sot down on de steps an' wrop myse'f roun' de whole blessid chunk, 'cepin' de rime." "It was sort of like this, boss. Last Tuesday, Master John he fetch home two of these here Florida watermelons, and him and Miss Sally sat down for to eat them. Master John and Miss Sally ain't got nothing that's too good for me, and the first news I knowed Miss Sally was a'hollering for Remus. I done the watermelon on the air, and I ain't got no better sense than for to go when I hears white folks a'hollering—I that when I wasn't so high. Leastways I galloped up to the back porch, and there sat the watermelons just as natural as if they'd have been raised on the old Spivey place in Putnam County. Then Miss Sally, she cut me off a slice—one of these here ungodly slices, big as your hat, and I sat down on the steps and wrap myself round the whole blessed chunk, excepting the rind." Uncle Remus paused and laid his hand upon his stomach as if feeling for something.
"Well, old man, what then?"
"Dat's w'at I'm a gittin' at, boss,"
"That's what I'm a'getting at, boss,"
said Uncle Remus, smiling a feeble smile.
"I santered roun' 'bout er half nour, an' den I begin
fer ter feel sorter squeemish—sorter like I done bin an' swoller'd 'bout
fo' poun's off'n de ruff een' uv er scantlin'. Look like ter me dat I wuz
gwineter be sick, an' den hit look like I wuzent. Bimeby a little pain
showed 'is head an' sorter m'andered roun' like he wuz a lookin' fer a
good place fer ter kotch holt, an' den a great big pain jump up an' take
atter de little one an' chase 'im 'roun' an' roun, an' he mus' er kotch
'im, kaze
"I sauntered round about a half hour, and then I begin
for to feel sort of squeamish—sort of like I done been and swallowed
about four pounds off of the rough end of a . Look like
to me that I was going to be sick, and then it look like I was wasn't. By
and by a little pain showed his head and sort of meandered round like he
was a'looking for a good place for to catch hold, and then a great big
pain jump up and take after the little one and chase him around and
round, and he must have caught him, cause
har1880.2007.001.0242.jpg
bimeby de big pain retch down an' grab dis yer lef'
leg—so—an' haul 'im up, an' den he retch down an' grab de udder one an'
pull him up, an' den de wah begun, sho nuff. Fer mighty nigh fo' hours
dey kep' up dat racket, an' des ez soon ez a little pain 'ud jump up de
big un 'ud light outer it an' gobble it up, an' den de big un 'ud go
sailin' roun' huntin' fer mo'. Some fokes is mighty cu'us, dough. Nex'
mornin' I hear Miss Sally a laughin', an' singin' an' a w'isslin' des
like dey want no watermillions raise in Flurridy. But somebody better pen
dis yer nigger boy up w'en I'm on de town—I kin tell you dat."
by and by the big pain reached down and grab this here
left leg—so—and haul him up, and then he reached down and grab the other
one and pull him up, and then the war begun, sure enough. For mighty nigh
four hours they kept up that racket, and just as soon as a little pain
would jump up the big one would light out to it and gobble it up, and
then the big one would go sailing round hunting for more. Some folks is
mighty curious, though. Next morning I hear Miss Sally a'laughing, and
singing and a'whistling just like they no watermelons
raise in Florida. But somebody better pen this here nigger boy up when
I'm on the town—I can tell you that."
XVI.
UNCLE REMUS PREACHES TO A CONVERT.
"Dey tells me you done jine de chu'ch," "They tells me you done joined the church," said Uncle Remus to Pegleg Charley.
"Yes, sir," responded Charley, gravely, "dat's so." "that's so."
"Well, I'm mighty glad er dat," "Well, I'm mighty gad of that," remarked Uncle Remus, with unction. "It's 'bout time dat I wuz spectin' fer ter hear un you in de chain-gang, an', stidder dat, hit's de chu'ch. Well, dey ain't no tellin' deze days whar a nigger's gwineter lan'." "It's about time that I was expecting for to hear of you in the chain-gang, and, instead of that, it's the church. Well, they ain't no telling these days where a nigger's going to land."
"Yes," responded Charley, straightening himself up
and speaking in a dignified tone,
"yes, I'm fixin' to do better. I'm preparin' fer to
shake worldliness. I'm done quit so'shatin' wid deze w'ite town boys.
Dey've been a
"yes, I'm fixing to do better. I'm preparing for to
shake worldliness. I'm done quit associating with these white town boys.
They've been a
har1880.2007.001.0243.jpg
goin' back on me too rapidly here lately, an' now
I'm a goin' back on dem."
going back on me too rapidly here lately, and now
I'm a'going back on them."
"Well, ef you done had de speunce un it, I'm mighty glad. Ef you got 'lijjun, you better hole on to it 'twell de las' day in de mornin'. Hit's mighty good fer ter kyar' 'roun' wid you in de day time an' likewise in de night time. Hit'll pay you mo' dan politics, an' ef you stan's up like you oughter, hit'll las' longer dan a bone-fellum. But you wanter have one er deze yer ole-time grips', an' you des gotter shet yo' eyes an' swing on like wunner deze yer bull-tarrier dogs." "Well, if you done had the on it, I'm mighty glad. If you got religion, you better hold on to it til the last day in the morning. It's mighty good for to carry around with you in the day time and likewise in the night time. It'll pay you more than politics, and if you stand up like you ought to, it'll last longer than a . But you want to have one of these here old time and you just got to shut your eyes and swing on like one of these here bull terrier dogs."
"Oh, I'm goin' to stick, Uncle Remus. You kin put your money on dat. Deze town boys can't play no more uv dere games on me. I'm fixed. Can't you lend me a dime, Uncle Remus, to buy me a pie? I'm dat hongry dat my stomach is gittin' ready to go in mo'nin'." "Oh, I'm going to stick, Uncle Remus. You can put your money on that. These town boys can't play no more of their games on me. I'm fixed. Can't you lend me a dime, Uncle Remus, to buy me a pie? I'm that hungry that my stomach is getting ready to go in moaning."
Uncle Remus eyed Charley curiously a moment, while the latter looked quietly at his timber toe. Finally, the old man sighed and spoke:
"How long is you bin in de chu'ch, son?" "How long is you been in the church, son?"
"Mighty near a week," replied Charley.
"Well, lemme tell you dis, now, 'fo' you go enny fudder. You ain't bin in dar long nuff fer ter go 'roun' takin up conterbutions. Wait ontwell you gits sorter seasoned like, an' den I'll hunt 'roun' in my cloze an' see ef I can't run out a thrip er two fer you. But don't you levy taxes too early." "Well, let me tell you this, now, before you go any further. You ain't been in there long enough for to go around taking up contributions. Wait until you gets sort of seasoned like, and then I'll hunt around in my clothes and see if I can't run out a or two for you. But don't you levy taxes too early."
Charley laughed, and said he would let the old man off if he would treat to a watermelon.
har1880.2007.001.0244.jpg
XVII.
AS TO EDUCATION.
As Uncle Remus came up Whitehall Street recently, he met a little colored boy carrying a slate and a number of books. Some words passed between them, but their exact purport will probably never be known. They were unpleasant, for the attention of a wandering policeman was called to the matter by hearing the old man bawl out:
"Don't you come foolin' longer me, nigger. Youer flippin' yo' sass at de wrong color. You k'n go roun' yer an' sass deze w'ite people, an' maybe dey'll stan' it, but w'en you come a slingin' yo' jaw at a man w'at wuz gray w'en de fahmin' days gin out, you better go an' git yo' hide greased." "Don't you come fooling along with me, nigger. You're flipping your sass at the wrong color. You can go round here and sass these white people, and maybe they'll stand it, but when you come a'slinging your jaw at a man what was gray when the famine days give out, you better go and get your hide greased."
"What's the matter, old man?" asked a sympathizing policeman.
"Nothin', boss, 'ceppin I ain't gwineter hav' no
nigger
"Nothing boss, excepting I ain't going to have no
nigger
har1880.2007.001.0245.jpg
chillun a hoopin' an' a hollerin' at me w'en I'm gwine
'long de streets."
children a'hooping and a'hollering at me when I'm
going along the streets."
"Oh, well, school-children—you know how they are."
"Dat's w'at make I say w'at I duz. Dey better be home pickin' up chips. W'at a nigger gwineter l'arn outen books? I kin take a bar'l stave an' fling mo' sense inter a nigger in one minnit dan all de school-houses betwixt dis en de State er Midgigin. Don't talk, honey! Wid one bar'l stave I kin fa'rly lif' de vail er ignunce." "That's what make I say what I does. They better be home picking up chips. What a nigger going to learn out of books? I can take a barrel stave and fling more sense into a nigger in one minute than all the school-houses betwixt this and the State of Michigan. Don't talk, honey! With one barrel stave I can fairly lift the veil of ignorance."
"Then you don't believe in education?"
"Hits de ruination er dis country. Look at my gal. De ole 'oman sont 'er ter school las' year, an' now we dassent hardly ax 'er fer ter kyar de washin' home. She done got beyant 'er bizness. I 'aint larnt nuthin' in books, 'en yit I kin count all de money I gits. No use talkin', boss. Put a spellin'-book in a nigger's han's, en right den en dar' you loozes a plow-hand. I done had de spe'unce un it." "It's the ruination of this country. Look at my gal. The old woman sent her to school last year, and now we daren't hardly ask her for to carry the washing home. She done got beyond her business. I ain't learned nothing in books, and yet I can count all the money I gets. No use talking, boss. Put a spelling-book in a nigger's hands, and right then and there you a . I done had the experience of it."
har1880.2007.001.0246.jpg
XVIII.
A TEMPERANCE REFORMER.
"Yer come Uncle Remus," "Here come Uncle Remus," said a well-dressed negro, who was standing on the sidewalk near James's bank recently, talking to a crowd of barbers. "Yer come Uncle Remus. I boun' he'll sign it." "Here come Uncle Remus. I bound he'll sign it."
"You'll fling yo' money away ef you bet on it," "You'll fling your money away if you bet on it," responded Uncle Remus. "I ain't turnin' nothin' loose on chu'ch 'scriptions. I wants money right now fer ter git a pint er meal." "I ain't turning nothing loose on church subscriptions. I wants money right now for to get a pint of meal."
"'Tain't dat." "It ain't that."
"An' I ain't heppin fer ter berry nobody. Much's I kin do ter keep de bref in my own body." "And I ain't helping for to bury nobody. Much as I can do to keep the breath in my own body."
"'Tain't dat, nudder." "It ain't that, neither."
"An' I ain't puttin' my han' ter no reckommends. I'm fear'd fer ter say a perlite wud 'bout myse'f, an' I des know I ain't gwine 'roun flatter'n up deze udder niggers." "And I ain't putting my hand to no recommends. I'm afeard for to say a polite word about myself, and I just know I ain't going round flatterning up these other niggers."
"An' 'tain't dat," "And it ain't that," responded the darkey, who held a paper in his hand. "We er gittin up a Good Tempeler's lodge, an' we like ter git yo' name." "We are getting up a Good Tempeler's lodge, and we like to get your name."
"Eh-eh, honey! I done see too much er dis nigger
tempunce. Dey stan' up mighty squar' ontwell dere dues commence ter cramp
um, an' dey don't stan' de racket wuf a durn. No longer'n yistiddy I seed
one er de head men er one er dese Tempeler's s'cieties totin' water fer a
bar-room. He had de water in a bucket, but dey ain't no tellin' how much
red licker he wuz a totin'. G'long, chile—jine yo'
", honey! I done see too much of this
nigger temperance. They stand up mighty square until their dues commence
to cramp them, and they don't stand the racket worth a durn. No longer
than yesterday I seed one of the head men in one of these Tempeler's
societies toting water for a bar-room. He had the water in a bucket, but
they ain't no telling how much red liquor he was a'toting. Go long
child—join your
har1880.2007.001.0247.jpg
s'ciety an' be good ter yo'se'f. I'm a gittin' too
ole. Gimme th'ee er fo' drams endurin er de day, an' I'm mighty nigh ez
good a tempunce man ez de next un. I got ter scuffle fer sump'n
t'eat."
society and be good to yourself. I'm a'getting too
old. Give me three or four drams of the day, and I'm
mighty nigh as good a temperance man as the next one. I got to scuffle
for something to eat."
XIX
AS A WEATHER PROPHET.
Uncle Remus was enlightening a crowd of negroes at the car-shed yesterday.
"Dar ain't nuthin'," "There ain't nothing," said the old man, shaking his head pensively, "dat ain't got no change wrote on it. Dar ain't nothin' dat ain't spotted befo' hit begins fer ter commence. We all speunces dat p'overdence w'at lifts us up fum one place an' sets us down in de udder. Hit's continerly a movin' an a movin'." "that ain't got no change wrote on it. There ain't nothing that ain't spotted before it begins for to commence. We all that providence what lifts us up from one place and sets us down in the other. It's continually a'moving and a'moving."
"Dat's so!" "Youer talkin' now!" "That's so!" "You're talking now!" came from several of his hearers.
"I year Miss Sally readin' dis mawnin," "I hear Miss Sally reading this morning," continued the old man, "dat a man wuz comin' down yer fer ter take keer er de wedder—wunner deze yer Buro mens w'at goes 'roun' a puttin' up an' pullin' down." "that a man was coming down here for to take care of the weather—one of these here Buro what goes around a'putting up and pulling down."
"W'at he gwine do 'roun' yer?" "What he going do around here?" asked one.
"He's a gwineter regelate de wedder," "He's a'going to regulate the weather," replied Uncle Remus, sententiously. "He's a gwineter fix hit up so dat dere won't be so much worriment 'mong de w'ite fokes 'bout de kinder wedder w'at falls to dere lot." "He's a'going to fix it up so that there won't be so much worriment among the white folks about the kind of weather what falls to their lot."
har1880.2007.001.0248.jpg
"He gwine dish em up," "He going dish them up," suggested one of the older ones, "like man dish out sugar."
"No," answered Uncle Remus, mopping his benign features with a very large and very red bandana. "He's a gwineter fix um better'n dat. He's a gwineter fix um up so you kin have any kinder wedder w'at you want widout totin' her home." "He's a'going to fix them better than that. He's a'going to fix them up so you can have any kind of weather what you want without toting her home."
"How's dat?" "How's that?" asked some one.
"Hit's dis way," "It's this way," said the old man, thoughtfully. "In co'se you knows w'at kinder wedder you wants. Well, den, w'en de man comes 'long, w'ich Miss Sally say he will, you des gotter go up dar, pick out yo' wedder, an' dere'll be a clock sot fer ter suit yo' case, an' w'en you git home, dere'll be yo' wedder a settin' out in de yard waitin' fer you. I wish he wuz yer now," "In course you knows what kind of weather you wants. Well, then, when the man comes along, which Miss Sally say he will, you just got to go up there, pick out your weather, and there'll be a clock set for to suit your case, and when you get home, there'll be your weather a'setting out in the yard waiting for you. I wish he was here now," the old man continued. "I'd take a p'ar er frosts in mine, ef I kotched cold fer it. Dat's me!" "I'd take a pair of frosts in mine, if I caught cold for it. That's me!"
There were various exclamations of assent, and the old man went on his way singing, "Don't you Grieve Atter After Me."
XX.
THE OLD MAN'S TROUBLES.
"What makes you look so lonesome, Brer Remus?" Brother Remus?" asked a well-dressed negro, as the old man came shuffling down the street by James's corner yesterday.
"Youer mighty right, I'm lonesome, Brer John
Henry.
"You're mighty right, I'm lonesome, Brother John
Henry.
har1880.2007.001.0249.jpg
W'en a ole nigger like me is gotter paddle de canoe
an' do de fishin' at de same time, an' w'en you bleedzd ter ketch de fish
and dassent turn de paddle loose fer ter bait de hook, den I tell you,
Brer John, youer right whar de mink had de goslin'. Mars John and Miss
Sally, dey done bin gone down unto Putmon County fer ter see dere
kinfolks mighty nigh fo' days, an' you better b'leeve I done bin had ter
scratch roun' mighty lively fer ter make de rashuns run out even."
When a old nigger like me is got to paddle the canoe
and do the fishing at the same time, and when you to catch the
fish and daren't turn the paddle loose for to bait the hook, then I tell
you, Brother John, you're right where the mink had the gosling. Master
John and Miss Sally, they done been gone down unto Putnam County for to
see their kinfolks mighty nigh four days, and you better believe I done
been had to scratch round mighty lively for to make the rations run out
even."
"I wuz at yo' house las' night, Brer Remus," "I was at your house last night, Brother Remus," remarked Brer John Henry, "but I couldn't roust you outer bed." "but I couldn't roust you out of bed."
"Hit was de unseasonableness er de hour, I speck," "It was the unseasonableness of the hour, I expect," said Uncle Remus, dryly. "'Pears unto me dat you all chu'ch deacons settin' up mighty late deze cole nights. You'll be slippin' round arter hours some time er nudder, an' you'll slip bodaciously inter de calaboose. You mine w'at I tell you." "Appears unto me that you all church deacons setting up mighty late these cold nights. You'll be slipping round after hours some time or another, and you'll slip bodaciously into the calaboose. You mind what I tell you."
"It's mighty cole wedder," "It's mighty cold weather," said Brer Brother John Henry, evidently wishing to change the subject.
"Cole!" "Cold!" exclaimed Uncle Remus; "hit got pas' cole on de quarter stretch. You oughter come to my house night 'fo' las'. Den you'd a foun' me 'live an' kickin'." "it got past cold on the quarter stretch. You ought to come to my house night before last. Then you'd have found me alive and kicking."
"How's dat?" "How's that?"
"Well, I tell you, Brer John Henry, de cole wuz so
cole, an' de kiver wuz so light, dat I thunk I'd make a raid on Mars
John's shingle pile, an' out I goes an' totes in a whole armful. Den I
gits under de kiver an' tells my ole 'oman fer ter lay 'em onto me like
she was roofin' a house. Bimeby she crawls in, an' de shingles w'at she
put on her
"Well, I tell you, Brother John Henry, that cold was
so cold, and the cover was so light, that I thunk I'd make a raid on
Master John's shingle pile, and out I goes and totes in a whole armful.
Then I gets under the cover and tells my old woman for to lay them onto
me like she was roofing a house. By and by she crawls in, and the
shingles what she put on her
har1880.2007.001.0250.jpg
side fer ter kiver wid, dey all drap off on de flo'.
Den up I gits an' piles 'em on agin, an' w'en I gits in bed my shingles
draps off, an' dat's de way it wuz de whole blessid night. Fus' it wuz me
up an' den de ole 'oman, an' it kep' us pow'ful warm, too, dat kinder
exercise. Oh, you oughter drapt roun' 'bout dat time, Brer John Henry.
You'd a year'd sho' nuff cussin'!"
side for to cover with, they all drop off on the
floor. Then up I gets and piles them on again, and when I gets in bed my
shingles drops off, and that's the way it was the whole blessed night.
First it was me up and then the old woman, and it kept us powerful warm,
too, that kind of exercise. Oh, you ought to dropped round about that
time, Brother John Henry. You'd have heard sure enough cussing!"
"You don't tell me, Brer Brother Remus!"
"My ole 'oman say de Ole Boy wouldn't a foun' a riper nigger, ef he wer' ter scour de country fum Ferginny ter de Alabam!" "My old woman say the Old Boy wouldn't have found a riper nigger, if he were to scour the country from Virginia to the Alabama!"
XXI.
THE FOURTH OF JULY.
Uncle Remus made his appearance recently with his right arm in a sling and his hand bandaged to that extent that it looked like the stick made to accompany the Centennial bass-drum. The old man evidently expected an attack all around, for he was unusually quiet, and fumbled in his pockets in an embarrassed manner. He was not mistaken. The agricultural editor was the first to open fire:
"Well, you old villain! what have you been up to now?"
"It is really singular," remarked a commencement orator, "that not even an ordinary holiday—a holiday, it seems to me, that
ought to arouse all the latent instincts of
har1880.2007.001.0251.jpg
patriotism in the bosom of
American citizens—can occur without embroiling some of our most valuable
citizens. It is really singular to me that such a day should be devoted by a
certain class of our population to broils and fisticuffs."
This fine moral sentiment, which was altogether an impromptu utterance, and which was delivered with the air of one who addresses a vast but invisible audience of young ladies in white dresses and blue sashes, seemed to add to the embarrassment of Uncle Remus, and at the same time to make an explanation necessary.
"Dey ain't none er you young w'ite men never had no 'casion fer ter strike up wid one er deze Mobile niggers?" "They ain't none of you young white men never had no occasion for to strike up with one of these Mobile niggers?" asked Uncle Remus. "'Kaze ef you iz, den you knows wharbouts de devilment come in. Show me a Mobile nigger," "'Cause if you is, then you knows whereabouts the devilment come in. Show me a Mobile nigger," continued the old man, "an' I'll show you a nigger dat's marked for de chain-gang. Hit may be de fote er de fif' er July, er hit may be de twelf' er Jinawerry, but w'en a Mobile nigger gits in my naberhood right den an' dar trubble sails in an' 'gages bode fer de season. I speck I'm ez fon' er deze Nunited States as de nex' man w'at knows dat de Buro is busted up; but long ez Remus kin stan' on his hine legs no Mobile nigger can't flip inter dis town longer no Wes' P'int 'schushun an' boss 'roun' 'mong de cullud fokes. Dat's me, up an' down, an' I boun' dere's a nigger some'rs on de road dis blessid day dat's got dis put away in his 'membunce." "and I'll show you a nigger that's marked for the chain-gang. It may be the fourth or the fifth of July, or it may be the twelfth of January, but when a Mobile nigger gets in my neighborhood right then and there trouble sails in and engages abode for the season. I expect I'm as fond of these United States as the next man what knows that the Buro is busted up; but long as Remus can stand on his hind legs no Mobile nigger can't flip into this town along with no West Point and boss around among the colored folks. That's me, up and down, and I bound there's a nigger somewhere on the road this blessed day that's got this put away in his rememberance."
"How did he happen to get you down and maul you in this startling manner?" asked the commencement orator, with a tone of exaggerated sympathy in his voice.
har1880.2007.001.0252.jpg
"Maul who?" exclaimed Uncle Remus, indignantly. "Maul who? Boss, de nigger dat mauled me ain't bornded yit, an' dey er got ter have anudder war 'fo' one is bornded. " "Maul who? Boss, the nigger that mauled me ain't borned yet, and they have got to have another war before one is borned."
"Well, what was the trouble?"
"Hit wuz sorter dis way, boss. I wuz stannin' down dere by Mars John Jeems's bank, chattin' wid Sis Tempy, w'ich I ain't seed 'er befo' now gwine on seven year, an' watchin' de folks trompin' by, w'en one er deze yer slick-lookin' niggers, wid a bee-gum hat an' a brass watch ez big ez de head uv a beer-bar'l, come 'long an' bresh up agin me—so. Dere wuz two un um, an' dey went 'long gigglin' an' laffin' like a nes'ful er yaller-hammers. Bimeby dey come 'long agin an' de smart Ellick brush up by me once mo'. Den I say to myse'f, 'I lay I fetch you ef you gimme anudder invite.' An', sho' 'nuff, yer he come agin, an' dis time he rub a piece er watermillion rime under my lef' year." "It was sort of this way, boss. I was standing down there by Master John Jeems's bank, chatting with Sis Tempy, which I ain't seed her before now going on seven year, and watching the folks tromping by, when one of these here slick-looking niggers, with a bee-gum hat and a brass watch as big as the head of a beer-barrel, come along and brush up against me—so. There was two of them, and they went along giggling and laughing like a nestful of yaller-hammers. By and by they come along again and the smart Aleck brush up by me once more. Then I say to myself, 'I lay I fetch you if you give me another invite.' And, sure enough, here he come again, and this time he rub a piece of watermelon rind under my left ear."
"What did you do?"
"Me? I'm a mighty long-sufferin' nigger, but he hadn't no mo'n totch me 'fo' I flung dese yer bones in his face." "Me? I'm a mighty long-suffering nigger, but he hadn't no more than touch me before I flung these here bones in his face." Here Uncle Remus held up his damaged hand triumphantly. "I sorter sprained my han', boss, but dog my cats if I don't b'leeve I spattered de nigger's eyeballs on de groun', and w'en he riz his count'nence look fresh like beef-haslett. I look mighty spindlin' an' puny now, don't I, boss?" "I sort of sprained my hand, boss, but dog my cats if I don't believe I spattered the nigger's eyeballs on the ground, and when he rose his countenance look fresh like beef haslett. I look mighty spindling and puny now, don't I, boss?" inquired the old man, with great apparent earnestness.
"Rather."
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"Well, you des oughter see me git my Affikin up. Dey useter call me er bad nigger long 'fo' de war, an' hit looks like ter me dat I gits wuss an' wuss. Brer John Henry say dat I oughter supdue my rashfulness, an' I don't 'spute it, but tu'n a Mobile nigger loose in dis town, fote er July or no fote er July, an', me er him, one is got ter lan' in jail. Hit's proned inter me." "Well, you just ought to see me get my up. They used to call me a bad nigger long before the war, and it looks like to me that I gets worse and worse. Brother John Henry say that I ought to subdue my rashness, and I don't dispute it, but turn a Mobile nigger loose in this town, fourth of July or no fourth of July, and, me or him, one is got to land in jail. It's into me."
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